telarna
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You Can Lead a Bard to Healthcare by telarna for tablelamp
Fandoms: Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023)
18 Dec 2023
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- but you sure can't make him drink!
Except, hang on, that's a lie; Holga absolutely can and will force medication down Ed's throat, she's got zero mercy for anyone who isn't Kira or a questionably attractive halfling man preferably carrying freshly scalloped potatoes, but. Where was he going with this.
Look, it's a metaphor, okay, Ed's working on it. He'll get back to you when he can see in a straight line again.
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Tales From Bunny Mountain by telarna for enemyofrome
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
24 Dec 2019
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The auntie freezes. “Ah,” she says, and swallows. “That is to say…” Her fingers tighten around the basket, and she goes on, despairingly, “Has Lan-er-gongzi not… spoken to you? Of the Thousand Freedoms spirit cleansing array and its… side effects?”
“A-yi,” Wei Wuxian says gravely, still petting the rabbit, “it is safe to say that he has not.”
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What’s a little grand theft dino between friends?
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Forces Impressed Thereon by telarna for valmora
Fandoms: Rivers of London - Ben Aaronovitch
17 Dec 2016
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"Every body perseveres in its state of rest, or of uniform motion in a right line, unless it is compelled to change that state by forces impressed thereon." - Isaac Newton
Thomas returns to the Folly in the wake of the defeat of Henry Pyke.
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Masochism by Prim_the_Amazing for Kolleh
Fandoms: 人渣反派自救系统 - 墨香铜臭 | The Scum Villain's Self-Saving System - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
17 Aug 2024
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“I’ll do it.”
Shen Qingqiu stares at him blankly for a long moment.
“You’ll… do what?”
Yue Qingyuan feels the same way. What did he just suggest? But despite himself, he continues.
“If you-- if you feel the need to visit a brothel, then-- just come find me instead. I won’t expect anything from you, including gratitude, and I won’t tell anyone about it either. That way it’ll be… it won’t cause you any trouble.”
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Yue Qingyuan and Shen Qingqiu start an arrangement.
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- English
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- 85,630
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- 7/7
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Bookmarked by telarna
09 Jun 2026
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Leaning in close, Harvey murmurs, “You’re awfully mouthy for this early in the evening.”
Mike tilts his head, flirtatious confrontation as the car rolls to a stop. “Bit early in the evening to be discussing my mouth, don’t you think? Sir?”
“Tell you what,” Harvey muses lowly. “You make me look good tonight, I’ll do more than just discuss it. Fair?”
Mike gulps and nods, light-headed, and he doesn’t think it’s from yesterday’s blood loss. He can feel Harvey’s breath on his lips, smell his cologne, subtle and smooth, thinks maybe he’s gonna get luckier than he’d hoped, and then with a smirk Harvey reaches across his body and cracks open the door. “Out,” he commands, and Mike sighs, hauling his tired ass out of the car. Figures.
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- English
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- 66,200
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- 7/7
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- 454
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Bookmarked by telarna
07 Jun 2026
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When Yuri steps off the plane at Narita International Airport for Japanese Nationals following his disaster at the Grand Prix Final, the last person he expects to see waiting for him is none other than Lilia Baranovskaya, demanding that Celestino hands Yuri over to her.
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- English
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- 200,374
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- 37/37
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Bookmarked by telarna
06 Jun 2026
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Leonyra's Adventures in the House of the Dragon by Loke_Lyon
Fandoms: House of the Dragon (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms
05 Jul 2024
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Gyldayn is the worst historian in Westeros. He can't even get the ages right, after all. Now she's stuck having to navigate the Dance of Dragons with some seriously inaccurate information.
A light-hearted take on the main character of The Blacks, the Greens and the Reds being inserted into HBO's House of the Dragon.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 54,096
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- 27/27
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- 546
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- 2,491
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- 747
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- 62,074
Bookmarked by telarna
24 May 2026
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Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
uhhh so im on r/shanehollander rn and some guy is claiming to have cloned shane’s dad’s phone and uploaded it to the internet?? has anyone else clicked on this link will it give me a virus if i do
7:03 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 135.1k retweets | 232.1k likes
Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
okay I googled his dad and he’s a 52 year old forensic accountant who thinks fashion peaked with ralph lauren polo shirts. am I enough of a hollander simp to risk my laptop just to look through the phone of his dad who acts like sandals and bermuda shorts are a risqué choice. yes.
7:04 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 137.1k retweets | 235.9k likes
Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
oh my god his password for everything is ShaneHollander24. pov you love your son so much that it compromises your bank account
7:04 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 143.7k retweets | 250.7k likes
Shandry's Third @shaneybaby
HOLY FUCK
7:19 P.M. | 12 Jan 2018 | 337.1k retweets | 413.3k likes
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 71,911
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- 7/?
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- 4,550
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- 18,465
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Bookmarked by telarna
23 May 2026