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Recent works
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saudade (will i ever find home again?) by questionablyflying12451
Fandoms: Heated Rivalry (TV)
19 Feb 2026
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Summary
For Ilya, home is an aching memory. It’s something that once was, existing in the back corners of his mind where it occasionally stirs like a creature twitching in its year long hibernation. It feels like an undying bruise: stinging, but bearable if ignored.
Home died with his mother. And now the only warmth he feels is the pulse of the rinkside heaters.
OR: Giving Ilya a much needed, thorough backstory
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to be understood (do you understand?) by questionablyflying12451
Fandoms: Babel - R. F. Kuang
06 May 2025
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The Chinese character ài (爱) carries the English meaning of “to love or to be fond of.” It’s not much different from its English counterpart: it’s what a father tells to his son, his wife. Or so Robin has been told.
But there was one thing that confused little Robin. The Chinese character for friend (友) was always present in ài. No matter what era of documents he scoured through, there wasn’t a single instance where ài lost its friend.
So perhaps he never learned the distinction between “friend” and “love.” Perhaps he had intertwined the two concepts in his mind so deeply it had, unbeknownst to him, changed the way he viewed his world. So much so that when he was presented with a friend, he thought it was love.
Or perhaps his feelings for that brown eyed boy were genuine. Perhaps the only reason he thought it was a friendship was because he was merely confused by the intricacies of language. It wouldn’t be the first time it had occurred.
He would die without an answer, left only with a feeling so intense it would follow him past his final breath.
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collection of poems i wrote way too late at night
topics of poems and their chapters:
>>SEE INSIDE<<
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sakura blossoms after spring by questionablyflying12451
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
07 May 2024
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It was Ayaka’s mother who first introduced her to tea ceremonies.
And since then she never stopped holding them.
Before her, Ayaka’s mother had organized a tea ceremony for the Tri-commission each spring as a yearly celebration to ensure prosperity and peace for the upcoming year. And it was at this table that yearly plans were proposed and hefty promises were made.
After all, spring was the perfect season for new growth.
Now with her mother passed, the responsibility fell into Ayaka’s hands.
At that table with those people, Ayaka would recall the times when she was younger, how mother and father would praise her skills with warm smiles. She could still feel their presence shining on her in the shade of scattered pink and purple petals.
She was only brought back when the final cup was drained and her brother said their final goodbyes. Together, they walked back to the Kamisato estate, exchanging no words.
Though he never admitted it, Ayaka knew her brother felt them too.
But at least they would always have the tea. The last trace of their love in their convoluted, confusing lives.
OR: Giving Ayaka's childhood the explanation it deserves
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4am thoughts by questionablyflying12451
Fandoms: 崩坏:星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)
12 Feb 2024
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Summary
collection of poems i wrote way too late at night
and i probably should have kept unpublished.
part 2topics of poems and their chapters:
1. star rail
Recent bookmarks
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Conlang Dialogue: House of the Dragon, Season 1 by Dedalvs
Fandoms: House of the Dragon (TV)
24 Oct 2022
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Summary
This is the created language dialogue from first season of HBO's House of the Dragon. (Please note: This work contains spoilers for season 1 of House of the Dragon.)
Series
Bookmarked by questionablyflying12451
05 Apr 2026
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In the daytime he tries not to think about it, but when he’s alone and honest, he can’t deny how much he wants Art—wants him back, wants him like before they graduated from Rebellato. Fuck. He’d live in a dorm room forever if he had to, wouldn’t even touch him if he didn’t want it.
Or—almost ten years, from Patrick's point of view.
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To Be Understood by Madness by The_Egg_Came_First
Fandoms: 崩坏:星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game)
21 Apr 2025
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Summary
There was screaming. Or maybe there had been.
Anaxagoras couldn’t tell.
He lay on his side, his body pressed against the cracked pavement, his cheek grinding into the coarse, rough concrete. His coat, twisted and tangled like a flag left to rot in a forgotten battlefield, draped over him in disarray. The fabric felt heavier than it had any right to. Smoke slithered through the air, thick and suffocating, curling and clinging to his lungs as if it, too, wanted to drag him into the chaos. The acrid bite of burning rubber and scorched coolant clawed at his throat, making each shallow breath a bitter fight. Somewhere, a sob echoed, distant and breaking, the sound warped by the fog of pain pressing in around him.AKA - Professor Anaxa gets into a bus accident and starts hallucinating the God of Reason. (MODERN AU with elements of alchemy and fantasy)
Bookmarked by questionablyflying12451
26 Jul 2025
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Bookmarker's Notes
absolute cinema it does not get better than this 5/5
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He gets home and his father is angry. That's the norm, so Ilya barely even cares to notice it, except his father is really angry. He doesn't like that Ilya was out all day. He's pacing the room in circles around Ilya, interrogating him on why he's home so late, and Ilya wants to roll his eyes.
You want me to play in the KHL, yes? Then I need to practice.
The answer was bullshit, for many reasons. Grigori Rozanov didn't know it yet, but Ilya would never play a single KHL game. At least, he hoped not. If things went the way Ilya wanted them to, he'd be drafted to the NHL in 2009, and he'd move to America, and he'd have money and fame and he'd never have to think about this godawful place again.
He only wishes he could bring his mother with him.
A series of scenes, both pre and post-canon, spanning thirty two years of Ilya Rozanov's life.
Series
- Part 1 of Through Time
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Summary
Flins is a late-night bakery employee, and Varka is the tired streamer who keeps visiting him at two in the morning.
Bookmarked by questionablyflying12451
03 Jan 2026
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Bookmarker's Notes
streamers kinda cute
