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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “I want one day,” Shane interrupted Ilya’s inner meltdown with, really, the only acceptable response. “And then we can…” Shane trailed off. “Then we can, I don’t know. Reset.”

    “Reset,” Ilya repeated, unconvinced.

    “Yeah.”

    It was another few moments of stunned silence before Ilya spoke again.

    “We could go somewhere.”

    *

    or, what if Shane decided to stay, that night… and then decided to miss his flight home the next day.

    Language:
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    15 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    So lovely and achey

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya Rozanov does not come pre-installed with good communication or healthy coping skills. Is he going to seek out help on his own? Hell no! But when a family member kills himself, fellow Boston Raider and friend Cliff Marleau decides that Ilya is going to therapy come hell or high water. And Ilya... well, Ilya is just playing along to keep the peace. Right? He doesn't need therapy. But if it helps his friend be less worried, so be it.

    OR

    What if Ilya came into the tuna meltdown with slightly upgraded social skills and no one actually ran away before they had a conversation?

    Series
    Language:
    English
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    28,232
    Chapters:
    5/5
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    12 May 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    "Nothing is running. It is a fucking blizzard," Ilya tried to sound calm, but he was still kind of freaking out.

    "What time is your flight back?" Hollander asked, still facing the window. It was hard to read his tone without seeing his face, although far be it for Ilya to complain about the view.

    "Probably not until afternoon, if planes take off at all tomorrow," Ilya admitted.

    "What hotel are you staying at?"

    "The Hyatt over by the rink,"

    "Yeah, you'll never make it back there tonight," Hollander muttered.

    They didn't stay. It just wasn't something they ever did. As soon as they were done, one of them was out the door and back to wherever they were supposed to be in the first place. But surely Hollander wasn't about to send him out into a literal blizzard with no way to get back to his hotel. Ilya put his phone on the nightstand and stood up, tentatively approaching where Hollander remained frozen staring out into the snowy abyss that had once been the city of Montreal.

    "Is it okay that I stay here?"

    "Well yeah, you're gonna have to, man, there's no way you're getting back tonight," Hollander replied like Ilya was being slow.

    Language:
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    2/2
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    04 May 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Lovely!

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya’s still learning what Shane likes and needs, observing him quietly because Shane’s not so forthcoming with what he wants unless he’s certain it’s what he’s supposed to want. But it’s not until Shane reaches back and grabs Ilya’s hip to pull him closer, pressing their bodies together and taking some of Ilya’s weight, that he realises Shane’s been studying Ilya the same way.

    “I’m trying to take care of you.”
    “Why?” Ilya says, instead of something safer.
    Shane twists over his shoulder to frown at him. “Because I want to? Because you’re tired and sad and not feeling well?”
    “Oh.” Ilya pulls his bottom lip through his teeth. “But I…”
    “I think maybe we both fucked up tonight?” Shane says tentatively.
    “No, is not your fault.” Ilya rubs a hand over Shane’s shoulder and then kisses it, wet and soft. “You’re good.”
    Shane hums like he’s not convinced. He turns and drapes his arms over Ilya’s shoulders, still pressed close. “After this, will you…”
    “Yes,” Ilya says, his mind sharpening attentively, “Tell me what you need.”


    Or: They communicate just a little bit better and let themselves be just a little more vulnerable, both with each other and their people.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,873
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
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    30 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Beautiful!!!!

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Ilya knows what he is. He has always known what he is. The word for it in Russian tastes like something you'd scrape off a boot.

    The word in English is bisexual, which is a nicer word, which he has heard, which he does not use. He uses other words. He uses the word his brother taught him. He uses it on himself before anyone else can.

    He grows up. He gets good at hockey. He moves to America. He... falls in love.

    (Or, five times people fail to notice Ilya being queer, and one time they have no choice.)

    Language:
    English
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    23 Apr 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Beautiful