Margot1972
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Summary
“In my humble opinion there’s only three things that men should be and that is bloody, slutty, and pathetic.” And, on a good day, Draco Malfoy can be all three.
When war heroine Hermione Granger and Azkaban-tattooed war criminal Draco Malfoy are forced to wed as part of Shacklebolt’s controversial Reconciliation Act, they openly fight the match and each other—their public brawls breathlessly reported by the press.
Secretly, a deeply traumatized Draco delights in Hermione’s attention and pines for a real marriage with her—even as her forced proximity to the Black family magic irritates the cursed scar Bellatrix left on her arm, reminding her why she can never truly trust or forgive him. Then Hermione discovers that Draco’s blood will soothe the scar . . . and Draco is willing to trade his blood for her body.
(With post-war blood purity politics, black market potioneers, Pansy Parkinson’s career advice, the Malfoys blackmailing Hermione’s Wizengamot opposition, BDE Neville Longbottom hunting Death Eaters, a slutty Theo Nott serving as Draco’s right-hand man, and Crookshanks loose in Malfoy Manor.)
Series
- Part 1 of THE BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC SERIES
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 195,969
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Comments:
- 7,498
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- 31,466
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- 12,483
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Bookmarked by Margot1972
06 Jan 2026
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Summary
"His face was numb from vodka, his shirt was unbuttoned, he was sliding onto a leather banquette in a club with bottle service, and a girl was running her hand down his chest, asking how he got his scars. "Cursed," he told her.
When his house arrest was done, Pansy dragged him along behind her to meet up with the pureblood scions who’d been too smart or too callow to get too involved, who definitely wanted to party but weren’t sure yet whether they wanted to party with Draco. They went to Muggle London—the supremacist kids always wanted to slum it there—and tried to pretend it was before the war.
The purebloods couldn’t decide if they wanted to suck up to him or take the piss out of him, but they knew he wasn’t fun. He and Theo both—they fought too much and too sloppy; they didn’t care how much they got hurt and they didn’t care whether they won."—Chapter 5, BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC
One shot inspired by BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC
Series
- Part 2 of Related to BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC
Bookmarked by Margot1972
06 Jan 2026
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GREEDY, UNGRATEFUL, AND IMPOSSIBLE TO PLEASE by WhatMurdah
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
21 Jul 2024
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Summary
“Sweet Salazar’s poxy dick, what is that?” said Theo, stepping from the floo into Draco’s dimly lit study.
“This is Mrs. Malfoy’s progeny,” said Draco dryly. The orange abomination sat on his desk, too close to his ledger for comfort. The animal’s expression was excessively judgmental. Draco sneered back. “I am not allowed to kill it.”—Chapter 5, BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC
A one shot about books, biscuits, and rodentia (or: the perils of gift-giving) inspired by Draco and Crooks in BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC
Series
- Part 3 of Related to BLOODY, SLUTTY, AND PATHETIC
Bookmarked by Margot1972
06 Jan 2026
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Summary
A few years have passed since Sarah left the Labyrinth. While she was able to put the past behind her, the Goblin King has not. Even though time hasn't healed his wounds, Jareth will soon discover that he must push aside his grief as he faces a danger that he might not be able to escape.
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Summary
He can never love her without fear of the consequences.
The Goblin King is suspected of violating an ancient law. Sarah is forced by the Fae Queen to trick him into confessing. But the crime is his love for her, and if she can't keep her heart to herself they will both lose everything.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 192,056
- Chapters:
- 21/21
- Comments:
- 239
- Kudos:
- 431
- Bookmarks:
- 135
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- 12,948
Bookmarked by Margot1972
15 Dec 2020
Bookmarker's Notes
Sara pozostaje człowiekiem, Jareth oddaje jej nieśmiertelność