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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    In the middle of a war, Hermione is stuck in the middle of nowhere.
    With Draco Malfoy.
    Without her friends, her magic, or her books, she has only her wits to rely on to survive her plight- to say nothing of her company. They've declared a truce, but somehow Draco keeps slipping past all her defences.

    Stranded together in the wilderness, Hermione and Draco are in for cold nights, endless snark, bad wine, and some interesting scars.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    39,811
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Collections:
    37
    Comments:
    1,507
    Kudos:
    16,223
    Bookmarks:
    4,935
    Hits:
    344,929

    21 Nov 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    On the 31st of October, an eleven-year-old girl will bring about the end of the world. According to prophecy, anyway, and everyone knows those are infallible.

    Fortunately, the world has unlikely heroes in the form of Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy, who've selflessly agreed to put aside their mutual hatred and long-standing prank war in order to find the girl and stop the apocalypse. If only they could be certain they have the right child…

    For fans of Terry Pratchett and dramatic irony, a comedy of errors about two people so stubbornly in denial, Fate itself decides to step in.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    116,391
    Chapters:
    14/14
    Collections:
    13
    Comments:
    1,770
    Kudos:
    3,744
    Bookmarks:
    2,507
    Hits:
    209,812

    24 Feb 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Hermione Granger and Draco Malfoy are cursed. Probably. Maybe.

    All Hermione knows for certain is that he keeps sticking his pointy nose and other body parts where they aren't welcome: like into her dating life, and under her skin, literally.

    Meanwhile, all Draco knows for certain is that in all his fantasies of getting into her knickers, he never imagined it happening like that.

    A twist of fate, a statistical anomaly, or a sex curse: whatever the cause, there's (probably) just one solution.

    -

    (In which Hermione and Draco Apparate into one another, repeatedly.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,244
    Chapters:
    4/4
    Collections:
    6
    Comments:
    655
    Kudos:
    2,871
    Bookmarks:
    865
    Hits:
    57,466

    22 Feb 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Post Hogwarts. Kids still at war. Angsty, angry, and men and women doing it in hotel rooms. This is obviously an AU by now.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,622
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    12
    Comments:
    597
    Kudos:
    5,611
    Bookmarks:
    1,422
    Hits:
    124,544

    26 Oct 2024

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Language:
    English
    Words:
    10,249
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    69
    Kudos:
    2,120
    Bookmarks:
    510
    Hits:
    50,430

    05 Jul 2024

  6. This has been deleted, sorry!

    25 Jan 2024

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    The sprawling mountains of the Romanian Dragon Sanctuary offered a perfect chance for renewed self-discovery. Lush landscapes. Majestic beasts. It was intended to be Hermione’s escape. Except, she hadn’t been alone in that plan.

    Four years had passed since she last saw him, and to her knowledge, no one else in Britain had either. Rumours had sprouted like plants under a Herbivicus Charm after he failed to return for the second half of their final year at Hogwarts. Even Hermione hadn’t been able to resist the question in nearly every student’s mind: Where had Draco Malfoy gone?

    Apparently, she now had the answer.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    102,178
    Chapters:
    22/22
    Collections:
    26
    Comments:
    1,756
    Kudos:
    7,076
    Bookmarks:
    2,733
    Hits:
    279,040

    27 Sep 2022

  8. Public Bookmark 56

    Summary

    This is part of an ongoing challenge and will be revealed soon!

    17 Jun 2022

  9. Public Bookmark 79

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    Summary

    “Watch it, Granger!” Malfoy protests from somewhere behind her, and despite the precariousness of her position, Hermione can’t help the hint of a smile that curls her lips at the thought of him having to dart out of the curse’s path.

    Serves him right.

    “Feel free to jump in and help any time you like!”
     

    Whilst on a case with a less-than-ideal partner, Hermione's met with some unexpected trouble that sparks the rediscovery of an old flame...and perhaps spells the beginnings of a new one, too.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,554
    Chapters:
    4/?
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    90
    Kudos:
    486
    Bookmarks:
    79
    Hits:
    7,770

    07 Mar 2022

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Hermione straddles the Muggle and Magical worlds as a medical researcher and Healer about to make a big discovery. Draco is an Auror assigned to protect her from forces unknown – to both of their displeasure.

    Features hyper-competent, fiery Hermione and lazy, yet dangerous, Draco. Slow burn.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    199,548
    Chapters:
    36/36
    Collections:
    206
    Comments:
    13,471
    Kudos:
    102,151
    Bookmarks:
    31,324
    Hits:
    5,532,922

    18 Feb 2022

  11. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    And in the heartbeat that he didn't return the kiss, Hermione saw the rest of her school year flash before her eyes. The embarrassment, the teasing. Her chest constricted at this terribly awful thing she just did — kissing Draco Malfoy.

    *

    Fic / Art Collab with NikitaJobson. Two-Shot

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    8,574
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    296
    Kudos:
    14,587
    Bookmarks:
    2,697
    Hits:
    350,423

    16 Jan 2022

  12. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary


    “Three minutes to the lift, two to the board room. I believe that gives me”—he lifted his forearm to check his watch—“eight minutes to make you come.”

    Fire pooled in her belly. “A bit cocky, are we?”

    “I’ve gotten you off in less.”

    **

    Something strange is up with Malfoy, Hermione's fellow Auror and secret shagging partner. Ready or not, she's about to find out.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,547
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    16
    Comments:
    216
    Kudos:
    10,698
    Bookmarks:
    2,019
    Hits:
    200,475

    16 Jan 2022

  13. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    “So, I’m not exactly a survival expert, but I’m pretty sure the best way to stay warm-”
    “Don’t- don’t say it-”
    “-Is to share-”
    “Oh no…”
    “Share body heat.”

    Hermione and Draco are stranded in a shack during a blizzard. Tropes ensue.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,875
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    5
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    1,033
    Bookmarks:
    137
    Hits:
    13,658

    28 Dec 2021

  14. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Draco and his mother had behaved like upstanding citizens for years, donated thousands of Galleons, yet apparently it only took a bit of romantic fluff with Granger and he could consider himself fully redeemed.

    A bar so low he’d barely need to raise his feet to clear it.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    14,395
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Collections:
    29
    Comments:
    569
    Kudos:
    10,531
    Bookmarks:
    2,574
    Hits:
    153,930

    28 Dec 2021

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Draco Malfoy gets locked a closet with Hermione Granger at a party. But is that all to the story? Comedy, Romance, Mystery and so much smut to come. Dramione 3 part series. Rated M FOR A REASON **WINNER: BEST MINI FIC 2017 Dramione Awards**

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    29,671
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    67
    Kudos:
    1,985
    Bookmarks:
    408
    Hits:
    72,048

    30 Nov 2021

  16. This has been deleted, sorry!

    14 Nov 2021

  17. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It's eighth year and Hermione is trying to navigate her post-war friendship with Draco Malfoy and a relationship with Ron Weasley when she gets an unexpected visit from someone who knows her better than anyone: herself. Thrown back from the future, an older Hermione drops a bombshell on her: she has only three days to set things right, or Draco dies.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    23,649
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    17
    Comments:
    376
    Kudos:
    5,367
    Bookmarks:
    1,573
    Hits:
    68,163

    11 Nov 2021

  18. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    The war is over, and Draco Malfoy is tired of being the perfect, obedient pureblood heir. Now he wants to lose his virginity, stat. And since Draco is back at Hogwarts for his eighth year, there should be plenty of opportunities... right? Dramione.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    33,004
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Collections:
    4
    Comments:
    340
    Kudos:
    2,485
    Bookmarks:
    560
    Hits:
    51,120

    10 Nov 2021

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Three years after leaving Hogwarts, Hermione is at the top of her field and presenting a breakthrough potion at a worldwide conference in Paris. When there are threats on her life by a radical wolf pack, she's assigned security for the week. As fate would have it, her security just happens to be the same man who was her first love.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    62,026
    Chapters:
    10/10
    Collections:
    24
    Comments:
    837
    Kudos:
    10,720
    Bookmarks:
    3,626
    Hits:
    344,538

    26 Oct 2021

  20. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    “So let me get this straight. I’m currently sitting in your mother’s waiting room because you’ve informed her that we are dating —” Hermione shuddered “— because you are tired of her trying to peacock you around —”

    “Peacock me?”

    “ — to her friends’ pureblood debutante daughters, and the only way you convinced her you were really dating someone is to say that you are having relationship problems with said person and needed to see your own mother for couples mind healing.”

    Malfoy shrugged one shoulder, his arms still crossed over his chest. “Yes.”

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    24,887
    Chapters:
    8/8
    Collections:
    8
    Comments:
    376
    Kudos:
    2,978
    Bookmarks:
    734
    Hits:
    57,593

    23 Oct 2021

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