Chapter Text
Jimmy couldn’t get Gary off his mind.
Every time he closed his eyes, he found himself back in that moment - Gary with his pants around his ankles, his face hidden beneath a jacket. Jimmy's jacket. His thoughts kept circling back to that detail. Out of everything that had happened, that was what stuck with him most. Gary had stolen his jacket just to pleasure himself with. Did that mean anything? Jimmy doubted it. It couldn't. And yet he couldn't stop wondering. He'd meant to apologize for walking in on him. The words had been right there, but when the moment came, they refused to leave his mouth.
Then Gary didn't show up to any of his classes. People skipped class all the time around here. Nobody thought much of it. But after what had happened the other night, every empty seat felt significant. Every missed class made Jimmy wonder if Gary was avoiding him. By the end of the day, Jimmy was tired of wondering. Every time he walked into class, he found himself scanning the room, only to be met with unfamiliar faces looking back.
That evening, he found himself outside the boys' dormitory. For a moment he considered what he was going to say. Sorry for walking in on you jerking it, can I have my jacket back? Jimmy shook his head and rubbed the back of his neck. That didn't sound right. He shoved his hands into his pockets and headed inside before he could talk himself out of it.
The hallway was quiet. Most of the residents were either out or downstairs. He found Gary's room near the end of the hallway and stopped outside the door. Jimmy's heart hammered against his ribs. This was stupid, there was no reason for him to be as nervous as he was. Dudes walk in on each other all the time, just apologize and move on. Don't even ask for the jacket back. He raised his hand and gave the door a hesitant knock.
Nothing.
Jimmy knocked again. This time, movement stirred on the other side. A chair scraped across the floor. The doorknob turned. Gary opened the door just enough to peek through the gap. The moment he recognized Jimmy, every trace of color drained from his face. "What do you want?" He hissed, not opening the door any further.
"I just wanted to talk."
"Well I don't. Goodbye." Gary went to close the door before Jimmy shoved his foot into the barely opened crack. "Just hear me out." He insisted.
Gary swung the door open, his jaw tightened and his brow furrowed. He jabbed an accusatory finger into Jimmy's chest. "You came here just to belittle me, didn't you? Who have you told? Who knows?"
Jimmy put his hands up defensively. "I haven't told nobody anything!"
"Bullshit."
"Gary, listen. I came to apologize."
Gary laughed once, a dry, humorless laugh. "Apologize?" Jimmy nodded and glanced past him into the room. Gary tapped his foot and bit the inside of his lip, clearly debating if he wanted to have this conversation or if he wanted to slam the door in Jimmy's face. His gaze flicked down the hallway. Then back to Jimmy. His fingers tightened around the edge of the door.
"Please, man. I'm serious. I didn't come here to make fun of you."
Gary stared at him. The hallway stretched silent between them. Jimmy could practically see the argument playing out behind Gary's eyes. Slam the door. Tell him to get lost. Pretend none of this ever happened. Sighing, Gary moved to the side and held his arm out for Jimmy to come in. "You've got five minutes. Make them count."
Jimmy stepped inside, the door clicked shut behind him.
Neither of them spoke.
Gary folded his arms. "Well?"
Jimmy had spent the entire walk over rehearsing what he wanted to say. Now that he was actually here, every word had vanished. "I... I'm sorry, for walking in on you... y'know..." He trailed off. Gary's face was burning with embarrassment, but he managed to keep what little composure he had left. "Is that it? Is that your big apology?" Gary scoffed, then pointed a thumb towards the door. "Thanks, now get out."
Jimmy didn't move. Gary frowned.
"What are you still doing here?"
Jimmy shifted his weight
"There was... something else." Gary's expression immediately darkened.
"Of course there was."
"No, that's not-"
"Then what?"
"Why did you have my jacket?" Jimmy practically blurted the words out, his cheeks beginning to redden as he spoke. The moment the words left his mouth, he regretted them.
Silence.
Gary went completely still. For a second, he looked like he'd forgotten how to breathe. "Like, is there a reason? Was it just an accident, like you happened to have my jacket on you and 'oh I need something to cover my face,' or...?" Jimmy rambled, uncharacteristically anxious.
"Are you asking to shame me? Is that what this is?"
Jimmy opened his mouth. The answer slipped out before he could stop it. "Dude, no, because I thought it was hot."
Both of them froze. Jimmy's face flushed a bright crimson, and Gary's color matched. Neither of them spoke. Fifteen seconds passed in absolute silence. What could either of them possibly say after that?
"You thought it was hot?" Gary echoed the statement. Jimmy swallowed hard, his heart hammering in his throat. "I mean..." He looked away. "Yeah. Yeah, it was hot."
"Which part?"
"What?"
"Which part was hot, Hopkins? Me? The fact I had your jacket? The whole thing? Elaborate." Jimmy stumbled over his words.
"I don't know."
Gary raised an eyebrow. "You don't know."
"I mean, I do, kinda."
"That's a very convincing answer." Jimmy groaned and dragged a hand down his face.
"You brought this on yourself, Hopkins."
"Yeah, I'm aware."
The room fell quiet again. Jimmy folded his arms. "It wasn't just one thing, okay?"
Gary's expression softened slightly. Jimmy took a breath.
"I think it was the whole thing."
"The whole thing?"
"Yeah."
His cheeks burned. "The jacket. You. The fact you looked so embarrassed when I walked in." The second he said it, he regretted it. For a moment, Gary just stared at him. Then the corner of his mouth twitched upward. It was the first genuine smile Jimmy had seen from him all evening. And somehow, that was worse. Gary took a step forward. Then another. Only then did Jimmy realize he was retreating. A moment later, his back bumped against the wall. Gary noticed. Of course he noticed.
"Yeah?" he asked, amusement creeping into his voice.
Jimmy's stomach dropped.
"What else was hot about it, friend?" Gary's voice lowered to a teasing, intimidating tone. Jimmy couldn't say anything, utterly speechless at the situation he found himself in. He could hear his own heartbeat, and he wondered if Gary could hear it too. He swallowed "uh... I don't - I don't..."
Gary's smile shifted. It was still there, but softer now, less sharp around the edges. "Don't what?" he asked quietly.
Jimmy looked at him, then immediately looked away again. "I don't know what you want me to say."
Jimmy let out a shaky breath. Gary's expression changed again, the teasing draining out of it slowly, like he was realizing something at the exact same moment Jimmy was. The silence stretched. Neither of them stepped back.
Jimmy's eyes flicked up without thinking, caught on Gary's mouth, and held there for half a second too long.
Gary noticed. Of course he noticed.
He took one small step closer. Not enough to crowd Jimmy, just enough to make the space between them feel intentional. Then, very carefully, as if giving Jimmy one last chance to run, Gary tilted his head. Jimmy's pulse thundered in his ears. The space between them suddenly felt impossibly small. Every breath, every shift of movement seemed amplified in the silence hanging between them. But Gary didn't move any closer. He just waited. Jimmy looked up at him. Really looked at him. The teasing grin was gone now, replaced by something softer. Something uncertain. For the first time since this whole conversation had started, Gary looked just as nervous as he felt. Neither of them said a word. For one terrifying second, Jimmy realized the choice was his. His stomach twisted. Then, before he could think better of it, he reached up and grabbed the front of Gary's shirt. Gary's eyes widened as Jimmy pulled him forward and crashed his lips into Gary's.
A startled noise left Gary's mouth as their lips collided. For one horrible second, Jimmy was convinced he'd just made the biggest mistake of his life. The kiss was awkward and uncertain, neither of them quite knowing what they were doing, but Gary kissed him back anyway.
The two pulled apart after a few heartbeats and stared at each other in stunned silence.
"James-"
Jimmy didn't want to hear whatever came next. Before Gary could finish, he yanked him back in, desperation knotting in his chest.