Work Text:
Lee Minho turned onto his other side in bed for what felt like the hundredth time.
Right after the fan meeting, which had dragged on far too long for his liking, he went straight home and shut himself in his room. For a few hours, he scrolled through various social media platforms, watching clips from the event and looking for things to improve. But more often than not, he found himself lingering on posts focused on that one moment. The one that made butterflies in his stomach and turned his ears red as a tomato.
It was about the moment when Kim Seungmin kissed him on the cheek. Well, technically, he hadn’t even touched him with his lips, but from the right angle, it looked completely different.
Minho hadn’t even noticed when the sun had set and small stars appeared in the sky. Even though he had long since put his phone down and closed his eyes, he couldn’t fall asleep. No, he couldn’t stop thinking about how it looked to the fans. The microphone perfectly covering the moment, the sound of Seungmin making a kissing noise… Fans squealing in the background, Chan probably reacting the same way, the members laughing… practically the perfect illusion for views and fan service.
And that was the problem.
An illusion. Something meant to deceive the viewer’s eyes. A lie, perfectly acted out.
Minho knew perfectly well it wasn’t real. After all, he had been there. He was the one who chose Seungmin to “fulfill Chan’s spoilers.” He had even tilted his head just right, giving the younger one the perfect opportunity. Then he overreacted so the fans could laugh. He played his role so well that social media was flooded with clips of that moment. Right after the event, he even posted on Bubble that he had washed his face three times, as if it were the funniest joke under the sun.
Even though he knew it was just another piece of fan service, suggested by their managers… Minho couldn’t stop thinking about it. His thoughts raced like wild horses, but Kim Seungmin kept appearing in all of them.
He turned onto his other side again, the sheets tangling around his legs. The room was completely dark and quiet, except for the occasional cars passing outside. His phone had long been resting on the nightstand, but his mind refused to shut off.
It kept replaying that one scene from earlier.
Seungmin’s face slowly moving closer, laughing. His warm breath brushing against Minho’s cheek, his eyes fixed on a single point on his face. And then… nothing. Literally nothing. No contact at all, just air and the warmth of his breath grazing his skin. It lasted exactly a second before Minho pulled away in “disgust,” and Seungmin rolled off on that stupid scooter of his.
Minho took a deep breath, pressing his face into the pillow.
“Idiot…” he mumbled into the fabric.
Of course it wasn’t real. Of course that damn dog didn’t actually kiss him. Of course he rolled away after a second on that ridiculous scooter. Why would Seungmin kiss him anyway? It was just fan service. Nothing more.
They’d done crazier things as a group. Way more out there than some fake kiss. His dance with Hyunjin to “Troublemaker”. His dynamic with Jisung was way more freaky than that so-called kiss. Hell, even Seungmin was more freaky with Changbin, letting himself be manhandled! Even the way Chan hugged everyone everywhere had more intimacy than that whole “kiss.”
Minho frowned at the thought.
Because today, he had seen Chan hug Seungmin on stage. He saw Seungmin allow it, smiling, clearly pleased.
Something in Minho’s stomach tightened.
Because Seungmin did all kinds of things with others, even in front of fans. He provoked Changbin and then enjoyed it when the other got irritated. He let Felix cuddle up to him, never pulling away. He stayed close to Hyunjin, often laughing at his jokes. He didn’t even mind flirting with Jeongin. When others teased him, Seungmin responded instantly sharp, playful and witty.
But with Minho?
A completely different story.
Sometimes Minho tried to provoke him, to get any kind of reaction. He nudged him, teased him, laughed at him, but Seungmin often just ignored him. Sometimes he’d smile and walk away, unfazed. Sometimes he didn’t even notice. The only thing that seemed to get his attention was when Minho stared at him like a psychopath, then Seungmin would actually stop and mirror his gaze.
It hadn’t always been like that. Minho couldn’t even pinpoint when things changed. Probably when their company came up with that stupid “divorce” concept. They had drifted apart a little then… not like drastically, but enough for people to notice.
Minho groaned, turning over again and rubbing his face.
It was frustrating. No, more than frustrating. Because Minho was actually trying to get something out of him. He nudged him, teased him, laughed at him, trying to make him react the way he did with everyone else.
But that stupid dog never did.
And the worst part? Minho couldn’t do it either.
He swallowed hard, sighing quietly.
He couldn’t hold eye contact with Seungmin for long, because his lips would immediately curl into a smile, and his heart would start beating faster. Warm, uncomfortable thoughts would form in his head, downright embarrassing ones. He became hyper-aware of himself. His voice and his appearance. Or the way he stood.
It didn’t happen with anyone else. Never with Chan or Felix. Hell, not even with Jisung, who he flirted with on stage all the time. He could hug anyone, smack their ass, joke around, do insane fan service. All that without getting nervous or shy.
But the moment he stood too close to Seungmin, his thoughts spiraled, his ears turned red, and he’d retreat, giggling like a shy girl. Sometimes, seeing Seungmin in certain stage outfits made him feel like a medieval man seeing a bare ankle.
“Why…?” Minho whispered into the darkness.
Why didn’t he just kiss him? Why go through all that acting?
It could’ve been simpler. Natural. They’d been a group for years, friends for years, they even hugged randomly during lives! They could act like a couple, and their ship was one of the more popular ones. Seungmin used to have no problem kissing him on the cheek. Back then, when they were younger, he would…
Minho held his breath.
Back then… they were closer, weren’t they?
He closed his eyes, frustration building in his chest.
“Ah, what the…!” he growled, throwing off the blanket and sitting up abruptly.
A thought flickered in his mind, the one that refused to leave. So he gave in to it, getting up and heading to his door, which he flung open.
If Kim Seungmin wasn’t going to kiss him… then he’d do it himself.
As soon as he stepped into the hallway, he realized how stupid and reckless the plan was. He had no proof Seungmin actually liked him. Just a few overexcited fan tweets picking apart every tiny interaction. Hell, he himself wasn’t even sure if he liked the younger one like that. It was absurd, but Minho was already up, so he might as well follow through.
Passing the kitchen, he spotted Jisung sneaking bites of cake they’d gotten from Hyunjin a few days earlier. He was in pajamas, hair sticking out in every direction. Judging by his half-lidded eyes, he had probably just woken up.
“Hyung?” Jisung asked, freezing mid-bite when he saw Minho marching past. “What are you even…?”
“Shhh.” Minho didn’t even slow down as he reached the entryway.
He quickly slipped on his shoes and, without caring how he looked, headed for the door.
“Hyung…?” Jisung tried again, blinking in confusion.
The only response was the sound of the door closing.
Jisung stared at it for a moment, then shrugged and went back to his cake.
***
Lee Minho was incredibly lucky, cuz the members’ apartments were in the same building, just on different floors. To get to Felix and Seungmin’s level, he had to go down a few floors. It gave him a moment to think.
His mind felt too loud. He placed each step carefully, yet quickly, afraid he might change his mind and turn back to his own apartment. In fact, he was dangerously close to doing exactly that. Inside him, fear mixed with hesitation, and his stomach was doing backflips.
It was a strange feeling, the one he hadn’t felt in a long time. The last time he felt like this was when he was going on a date with someone attractive ages ago. Now it was the same, except this time he was heading to Seungmin’s room, his best friend.
“Ah, what the…” he muttered under his breath, running a hand through his hair and slowing down slightly.
Why did he feel like this? Why did Seungmin always make him feel this way? Had he really fallen in love with his friend, the one who sometimes avoided him like the plague? The universe and the gods must have thought his life was some kind of bad joke. He had already made a fool of himself once when he appeared on National Geographic as a teenager.
The walk to his friends’ apartment felt far too short. He didn’t have enough time to properly reconsider, and suddenly he was standing in front of their damn door. Minho stopped and stared at it for a long moment.
He could still turn back. Say “fuck it” and go home. Back to his apartment, casually finishing the leftover cake with Jisung as if nothing had happened. Pretend he hadn’t just stormed out like he’d been electrocuted, all to kiss his best friend.
And yet, his hand lifted on its own and knocked. Sounds of movement came from the other side. He could still run. Turn on his heel, hide, pretend it was some younger members pulling a prank. He could…
The door opened, and a blond-haired boy stood there. Too late.
“Hyung?” Felix asked, surprised, raising his eyebrows.
“Felix?” Minho blinked as if seeing him for the first time.
“Well… yeah?” Felix tilted his head slightly, even more confused.
“What are you doing here?” Minho asked, blinking rapidly and frowning.
“I mean… I kind of live here…?” Felix replied after a moment, his tone making it sound like he was the one asking the question. Then he let out a small laugh, shaking his head.
“…Right,” Minho cleared his throat. “I thought you’d be at Chan’s or something.”
“We had a small misunderstanding,” Felix sighed, scrunching his nose. “I need a few days away from him.”
“…Oh…” Minho tried to fill the brief silence.
“Seungmin’s in his room,” Felix said with a smile, stepping aside.
Minho didn’t respond, he just walked in. Now he definitely couldn’t turn back, not with Felix watching him with his arms crossed. God, this was so embarrassing. He’d just been caught on his “mission” and couldn’t even leave.
So, with red ears, he walked quietly, knowing exactly where he was going. He’d been in that room so many times he couldn’t count, especially when they were working on a song together. But back then, he definitely hadn’t been this nervous.
Each step felt heavier. His heart pounded against his chest and his mind a storm. Still, he didn’t stop until he reached the door. He closed his eyes for a moment, counting to three, when he opened them, he noticed Felix was still standing in the hallway, watching him expectantly.
Fucking hell.
He opened the door and stepped inside.
Seungmin was sitting at his desk, headphones on, fingers moving quickly across the keyboard. The glow of the computer lit up his face, and it was obvious he was gaming. He wore glasses, hunched over like an old man, a blanket draped over his shoulders. His entire room definitely needed cleaning.
For a moment, Minho didn’t move and he just stared at Seungmin, like always. Judging by how fast his heart was beating and the tightness in his chest, he might have been on the verge of a heart attack. And, Gosh, he might have just fallen for a nerdy gamer.
At some point, Seungmin noticed him and flinched slightly in his chair. He turned fully toward Minho, pulling one side of his headphones off.
“Oh my God, hyung!” he said, shocked. “I didn’t know you were here! When did you even come in?”
“Shut up, Kim Seungmin,” Minho hissed.
“…Huh? What?” Seungmin blinked, eyes widening.
Minho didn’t answer. He just started walking closer, slowly, step by step and staring at him intensely. Seungmin kept looking at him, confusion gradually replacing surprise. He took off his headphones completely and set them aside, not breaking eye contact.
“Hyung? What are you even…?”
Minho suddenly leaned in, placing his hands on either side of the chair. Seungmin pressed back into the backrest, his gaze darting around the room, avoiding the boy towering over him.
Minho closed his eyes and kissed him.
Right on the lips.
It was nothing like the “kiss” at the fan meeting. There was no space between them. Their lips actually met, soft and real. Seungmin’s lips felt warm… soft… perfect.
Minho’s whole body felt like it was on fire, his ears probably as red as a beet. His chest felt tight and full at the same time, like he might explode. Everything felt surreal, unreal and yet he could feel their lips brushing.
For a moment, it felt like the whole world went silent.
Seungmin didn’t react. Didn’t move. He just sat there, frozen, staring at Minho with wide eyes. He didn’t kiss back. Nothing. Zero, null. Totally blank.
Minho pulled away abruptly, opening his eyes. His heart nearly jumped out of his chest when he saw Seungmin staring at him, eyebrows raised. Gosh, he wasn’t even blinking.
“Alright, Kim Seungmin, bye!” Minho said quickly, turning on his heel.
A thousand thoughts flooded his mind. He barely managed one step before he felt a hand grab him.
“Hyung…” Seungmin whispered.
Before Minho could form a single coherent thought, he felt a sudden, firm pull. He lost his balance, his foot catching on something, and a quiet, surprised sound escaped him. For a split second, he was sure he was about to hit the floor, but instead, he landed in Seungmin’s lap.
So technically… he still landed on something.
He froze, completely disoriented, feeling the warmth beneath him. He was just about to push himself up when Seungmin’s lips found his again. This time, the kiss wasn’t gentle, it was firm and certain. Minho stiffened for a second, his heart racing even faster. Then… he kissed back.
Seungmin’s hand tightened on his thigh, pulling him closer, as if the nonexistent space between them was still too much. Minho let out a breath, something between a sigh and a soft moan, and then his mind simply shut down. There was only Seungmin, his hands, his lips, exactly where they should be.
Minho didn’t want the moment to ever end. Warmth spread through his body in slow, heavy waves, making it hard to breathe. His heart was beating so fast he probably needed a medical check-up. This couldn’t be real and yet it was. Seungmin was really kissing him.
Another helpless sound escaped Minho. Without thinking, he lifted his hand and slid it to the back of Seungmin’s neck, fingers tightening instinctively. He deepened the kiss.
This time, Seungmin let out a soft sound too, parting his lips slightly. Minho reacted instinctively, giving in completely. Their tongues clashed briefly, and Minho’s other hand found Seungmin’s hair, threading his fingers through it. Seungmin inhaled sharply.
Minho thought he might faint or fall apart completely. But he couldn’t pull away. Because Seungmin tasted so familiar in a way that made no sense and yet felt so right. Addictive. Like something his body recognized instantly. He felt like after this, he’d never be able to kiss anyone else.
Gosh. What the hell was he doing. What the hell THEY were doing. He was kissing Kim Seungmin like there was no tomorrow and he didn’t want to stop.
Minho shifted slightly, brushing against Seungmin, making the younger let out a soft moan against his lips. That snapped him out of it. He froze for a second, then pulled away. Seungmin tried to kiss him again, but Minho stopped him halfway. Their faces were still close. Minho could feel Seungmin’s breath, uneven and warm, brushing against his lips.
Minho didn’t dare open his eyes.
“Hyung…” Seungmin’s voice was quieter than usual. No teasing and no jokes.
Minho sighed softly, feeling the grip on his thighs tighten slightly.
“What?” he asked, but his voice came out weaker than intended. Barely audible.
Silence followed. Long silence. Minho could feel Seungmin staring at him without even opening his eyes. His chest tightened, and he licked his swollen lips.
“Why did you come here?” Seungmin finally asked.
“What kind of question is that?” Minho scoffed automatically, but there was no bite in his voice. There never was when it came to Seungmin. He always had that strange softness toward him.
Seungmin didn’t answer. He shifted slightly in the chair, leaning back. Probably trying to get a better look at him and that made Minho open his eyes.
Big mistake.
He held his breath. There was no teasing glint in Seungmin’s eyes. No smugness, no amusement. He was looking at Minho gently and with something in his gaze that Minho couldn’t name. It felt dangerous.
“Hyung,” Seungmin repeated, softer this time. “You came in and kissed me.”
“I know what I did,” Minho snapped immediately, his face burning.
“Then explain…”
“I don’t have to explain anything to you.”
“You kind of do, if you expect me to just…” Seungmin muttered, gesturing between them with one hand while still holding Minho in place with the other. “…if I’m supposed to just go along with it…”
“You don’t have to go along with anything,” Minho bristled, suddenly very aware of their position.
“You literally just kissed me?” Seungmin raised an eyebrow slightly.
“And you kissed me back. Actually, you started the second one,” Minho shot back, lifting his brows as well.
Seungmin fell silent instantly and Minho immediately regretted his words. It felt like he had just picked the worst possible dialogue option, and his love meter had dropped drastically. In his mind, he could already see Seungmin laughing, saying something worse like “it was just a joke” or “you looked so pathetic I felt bad.”
His stomach flipped again, and he felt like he might throw up.
“…Yeah,” Seungmin said after a moment. Just that with no excuses or denial. “But why did you do it?”
Minho’s heart started doing somersaults again. He hated that question. There was no simple answer and the real one felt too hard to say. Too embarrassing. So he chose the dumbest possible option.
“Because you didn’t kiss me earlier.”
“What?” Seungmin blinked, unsure how to respond.
“At the fan meeting,” Minho continued, sighing loudly and rolling his eyes. “You didn’t actually kiss me… you just pretended.”
“…Is that really what this is about? You came into my room and kissed me because I pretended to do it at a fan meeting?” Seungmin asked, stunned, his eyes widening.
It sounded unbelievably stupid, but there was no way he was going to admit he was in love with him like an idiot.
“And you weren’t paying attention to me at all,” Minho snapped, more harshly than he intended. “You give it to everyone else, but not me, damn it.”
Seungmin’s expression shifted immediately. His lips curved into a soft smile, and his eyes softened as he looked straight at Minho. The older one cleared his throat, staring down at his hands clenched in Seungmin’s hoodie.
“Everyone else?” Seungmin repeated quietly.
“Changbin, for example,” Minho started listing, glaring at him. “You’re always waiting for him to manhandle you. Felix, Hyunjin… even Chan! He hugs you, and you just let him!”
Seungmin let out a quiet chuckle, resting his forehead against Minho’s shoulder.
“And me?” Minho pressed, his voice rising slightly. His hand instinctively moved to Seungmin’s hair. “What, you just… smile and walk away? Ignore me? Okay, sometimes you hold my gaze when I stare at you, but normally…”
Minho realized he had just said something out loud that he hadn’t meant to. A truth he’d been pushing away. Lee Minho was just a jealous idiot and he had just admitted it to the person involved.
The room fell into silence. Not a comfortable one. Minho wished he could take back his words or better yet, this entire situation, but he couldn’t. He felt Seungmin shift slightly against his shoulder, and then heard his soft voice.
“Hyung… you really don’t get it…” Seungmin said, lifting his head and looking him straight in the eyes.
Minho swallowed.
“I don’t get it?” he muttered, frowning.
Seungmin laughed softly, like he couldn’t believe what he was hearing.
“Hyung…” he sighed, brushing his thumb against Minho’s cheek. “Do you even realize how you act around me?”
Minho straightened and went rigid. Oh, he knew exactly what Seungmin meant. Still, he decided to play dumb, like he clearly was.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked, clearing his throat.
“You can barely look me in the eyes most of the time.”
“That’s not true!” Minho shot back immediately, his face turning completely red as his gaze dropped.
“You get shy,” Seungmin continued, gesturing with one hand. “You become… different. You act completely differently than you do with others. Look at you and Han! You can flirt with him all the time, make jokes, even touch him suggestively… But with me, you’re so different that I don’t even know how to act. You can’t even touch me without turning red.”
Minho opened his mouth, then immediately closed it. Because he couldn’t deny it. There was proof everywhere. Even now.
“And you think I’m the one acting weird?” Seungmin asked. “Every time you try to provoke me and I respond, you freeze up, start laughing, and run away.”
Something in Minho’s chest tightened.
Because that wasn’t a lie. Whenever Seungmin responded to his teasing, Minho shut down completely and chose to escape instead. And when Seungmin held his gaze too long, he’d just grin like an idiot.
“And you’re asking why I don’t treat you like the others?” Seungmin murmured, watching him.
“…Yeah,” Minho cleared his throat, looking away.
Even now, he couldn’t look him in the eyes. His face burned red. Seungmin sighed softly, brushing his cheek again.
“Because it’s not the same,” he said, like it was the simplest truth in the world.
“What does that mean?” Minho asked immediately, his gaze snapping back to Seungmin.
Seungmin hesitated. And for the first time… he looked unsure. He glanced away, toward the wall behind Minho. A faint blush spread across his cheeks. The sight did something strange to Minho’s heart.
“You think I don’t react to you, that I don’t give you enough attention,” Seungmin started quietly.
“Well, yeah,” Minho swallowed.
“Hyung…” Seungmin sighed softly. “I’m trying to avoid reacting to you. I’m trying to avoid giving you attention.”
“…What?” Minho’s brain completely short-circuited.
Seungmin rolled his eyes and looked back at him, so intensely it felt like he could burn a hole through him. This time, Minho didn’t look away.
“I’m trying to avoid it…” Seungmin repeated. “…because otherwise…”
He froze mid-sentence.
“Because otherwise what?” Minho leaned in slightly without even realizing it, as if instinct had taken over.
Seungmin’s gaze dropped down to Minho’s lips. Minho noticed immediately and froze.
“…Because otherwise, I’d do things like this in front of all the fans,” Seungmin finished quietly.
And then he kissed him again. This time, it was much softer and unhurried. Like he was sure it wouldn’t be the last.
Minho melted completely. There was no other word for it. All the tension, frustration, and questions that had been tormenting him just… dissolved. Because this… this gave him more than any words could.
Minho exhaled through his nose, tightening his hold on Seungmin. This time, it was firmer, but gentler. Seungmin’s hand slid from his thigh to his back, pulling him closer, and Minho could practically feel him smiling into the kiss.
When they finally pulled apart, it was reluctant. They clearly wanted to continue, but their lungs weren’t quite up for it. Minho let his forehead fall lightly against Seungmin’s shoulder, trying to catch his breath. He felt a soft brush of lips against his hair.
“You’re annoying,” he muttered into his shoulder.
“You’re the one who came here and kissed me,” Seungmin chuckled softly, tracing circles on his back.
“Because you apparently don’t know what a kiss is, since during…”
“That was fan service,” Seungmin sighed, making Minho smile.
“I’m well aware of that.”
“Then why…?”
“Because I wanted to,” Minho said, before he could stop himself.
He hadn’t meant to say it. Not at all, because now the words hung in the air between them. Silence filled the room. He felt Seungmin freeze beneath him. Minho closed his eyes, silently begging for this to be a dream.
It wasn’t.
“Hyung…” Seungmin said quietly.
Minho didn’t respond, pressing his face into the crook of his neck, breathing him in. He didn’t trust himself. He was almost certain that if he looked at him, he’d completely fall apart and never want to let go. Seungmin shifted, forcing him to lift his head. He gently tilted Minho’s chin up so he would look at him.
“You should’ve said that from the start,” Seungmin murmured.
“I’m not you, idiot,” Minho sighed, looking into his eyes. “I don’t say things like that.”
“I noticed,” Seungmin laughed softly.
Minho rolled his eyes, but there was no irritation in it. Just warmth. Embarrassing, overwhelming warmth and probably reserved forever for that big, stupid dog.
“So… what now?” Minho asked after a moment.
“Well…” Seungmin murmured. “Now I know you came all this way just to kiss me.”
“It’s not that far, and I didn’t ‘come all this…’”
“And,” Seungmin continued smoothly, cutting him off, “you admitted you wanted me to kiss you.”
“Just stop talking, Kim Seungmin,” Minho groaned.
Seungmin smiled widely, pulling him closer. He leaned in and kissed him again, without any hesitation, silencing them both. Maybe Felix was standing outside the door listening. Maybe tomorrow they’d wake up and even regret it. But Minho stopped thinking about that.
Because now… Lee knows.