Chapter Text

my thoughtless thoughtcrime,

When I reached my hand to the sky,
I wished I could feel your hand holding mine.

acoasm,

[ …. ………r ……a
i . . . n. ……
a …….g… …
ai…
….. n…
…
.. ]

It was about the eighth day of the test when the ambiance of the storm’s incessant taps filled the room, followed by the trails of water that slid down the glass pane of the window on the wall behind him, begging to be let inside.

With the tick of a wristwatch marking the afternoon of the day, Ratio cast his attention to the man sitting on the other side of the observation glass — the man sitting at an empty table with his head turned to his own window beside him to watch the weather outside.

It was usually like this, Ratio thought.

Whenever it rained, there was almost always a moment when he would catch Aventurine like this.

Quiet.

Pensive.

Wistful, almost, with something heavy weighing down the diamond pupils.

The usual bravado facade Ratio was familiar with would instead dwell a little deeper under the surface. And as there were times when some smiles didn’t reach Aventurine’s eyes on a normal day, Ratio found that most didn’t during this time. With how the atmosphere veiled their world in a muted gray, Ratio merely wondered about how much longer the man’s flamboyance would survive.

[ .. …. . … … ]

The static in the back of his head faintly buzzed — hardly loud enough that the rain would have nearly overshadowed it had it not been for Ratio trying to maintain his focus on the noise. Fortunately, he had managed to catch the changes and differences in the noise: the peaks of distortion that sounded like someone briefly adjusting the volume dial up before lowering it back down, and the shifts in the frequency of the sound's oscillations.

During certain moments, it’d be higher-pitched — sometimes even a sharp jump in noise — and in other moments, it’d drop into a low pitch.

Was the static truly an effect of the Curio?

That was his initial hypothesis at the beginning of the test: figuring that instead of actual mind-reading, the participants grasped something like very vague concepts of their partner’s thoughts at a surface level.

But after reviewing several notes, and including some observations reported from Aventurine himself, substantial thoughts were being processed, and that included streams of consciousness. And based on some of the participants’ answers in the test sessions earlier, they were able to recite detailed information and information specific to their partner.

It’s like hearing a second inner voice, some of them described.

(Although, Ratio came to quickly learn the differences between mind-reading and telepathy with this Curio. Where telepathy involved active communication, he observed that the participants struggled to communicate in basic conversation.

'It felt hard — like speaking to a void and waiting for the void to respond. And it gets a little awkward because of the delay in waiting for that response.'

'There was a time when we tried to talk about an animal that scares us. I heard them think about something from their past, but when I responded to that, my partner looked surprised afterwards. Turns out, they said they didn’t mean to respond with that.'

Rather, the participants weren’t able to grasp a normal conversation as they frequently had to talk or ask verbally with their partners to continue a conversation.)

However, as this Curio limited itself to a shared link between two people, Ratio’s first-hand observations relied on his first partner — and mostly his partner — as his second inner voice was the persistent static.

That being said, there were times when it did speak, much like how it did earlier when Aventurine stared out at the window, and all the other rare times, albeit brokenly.

Those cases — most of them seemed unintentional based on the moments when Aventurine looked surprised whenever Ratio brought it up, such as when Aventurine was trying to figure out what wine to bring to one of their dinners, and the one day when Aventurine asked him what he had heard after he was violently awakened from his nap by whatever was in his mind.

Were those times due to Aventurine’s brief moment of letting his guard down, or was it because Ratio himself had somehow managed to capture the fleeting frequency of that thought?

“Director Aventurine.”

His assistant, Margaret, came into view, finally entering the testing room with a clipboard and tablet in her hands. Ratio straightened up, reaching for his own tablet that had been sitting on his desk. At the same time, Margaret strode over to the seat across the table from Aventurine, who had already gathered his bearings and displayed a polite smile.

As always, he did this. Ratio rumbled quietly as he caught the purple-blue eyes flickering at him briefly.

“I apologize for the wait,” Margaret said, taking her seat. “Are you ready to begin the test? Or do you have any questions before we start?”

Aventurine shook his head as he replied, “I’m in your hands, Miss Margaret.”

“Then —” Margaret cleared her throat and gestured at her tablet. “I’m going to show Doctor Ratio a series of pictures, and you’ll answer the questions based on what you hear Doctor Ratio is thinking about. If you are unable to answer, then you’re free to skip.”

“Perfect. With the Doctor’s mind, this will be a walk in the park,” Aventurine said, and Ratio’s brow twitched at the lips curving teasingly from the other side of the glass when Aventurine shot him a look. “Don’t get mad if I pass the test with a perfect score.”

Ratio clicked his tongue, waving a hand to dismiss the banter.

“You can begin the test now, Margaret,” Ratio said, earning a nod from his assistant.

On cue, his tablet flashed a simple picture.

“What do you see, Director Aventurine?”

“A red square.”
Correct.

Next picture:
“An apple.”
Correct.

Next:
“A pig.”


Next:
“A glass cup.”


Next:
“A wooden chair.”


Next:
“A green ribbon.”


Next:
“A desk lamp.”


Next:
“A brick house.”

“How clear were Doctor Ratio’s thoughts at that time?”

Aventurine hummed as he leaned back in his chair and tilted his head lazily in thought.

“I’d say it’s as clear as day. I was able to pick up his thoughts easily — or rather easier than other times — since, from what I’m guessing, Doctor was concentrating real hard there,” Aventurine answered, shrugging lightly. “Though now, his mind’s all over the place again.”

Ratio clicked his tongue, unamused when Aventurine’s smile widened.

“Interesting,” Margaret murmured, briefly jotting down notes in her clipboard before she glanced at the observation glass to receive a head nod to continue. “Anyways, I’ll give a couple of questions now. Try to recite what you hear from Doctor Ratio as best as you can, and if you are unable to provide the question, you can skip.”

“I’m in your hands.”

With a nod, Margaret swiped on her tablet.

“Think of the last meal you had without each other. What was the last thing Doctor Ratio ate?”
“Cosmic Fried Rice.”
Correct.

“What was the last thing he had read?”
Aventurine’s eyes lowered a bit, face creased in an attempt to focus.
“Some… philosophical book about understanding the human mind.”
… Mildly correct.

“For Doctor Ratio, observe something within the room. For Director Aventurine:
What is the first thing that you hear?”

Ratio forced himself to move his head before he could linger any longer on the purple-blue eyes that turned to him in anticipation — opting forcing himself to be interested in the trails of water on the window in the observation room. Ratio tuned in to the sounds of the patterings from the outside, tracing the outlines of the dark clouds hanging in the air as he tried not to ruminate on the volume of the static rising in the back of his head.

Ah, how unpleasant this storm was.

[ . . . … . …………
…………
…… ? ……
. . . . .. . . . ]
(a low pitch… interesting.)

“The rain outside.”

Ratio’s curiosity piqued at the hidden crack of hesitation that yet spread so smoothly along Aventurine’s curved lips.

Aventurine continued, “In fact, it’s pouring a lot more than usual — not to mention how thick the clouds are. And — ah, according to the Doctor’s mental weather reports, it’ll storm for the next few hours or so,” An exasperated sigh before Aventurine tilted his head at Ratio. “Seems like the weather will be unpleasant today. Right, Ratio?”

Margaret glanced over at Ratio.

Ratio furrowed his brows, clicking his tongue disapprovingly at the mildly provocative smile before he turned down to his tablet to jot his notes.

“Correct,” Ratio stated. “He read my thoughts well.”

“Then, for the last one: Recite whatever you hear, Director Aventurine. As for Doctor Ratio…”

Margaret cleared her throat.

“Describe the first person that comes to mind.”

The first person that comes to mind…
The first person…

It wasn’t a hard task to think about a person — at least in this case, Ratio didn’t struggle to come up with one.

Because the first person whose eyes he landed on was sitting on the other side of the glass,
looking at him with a sense of curiosity and anticipation.
The purple-blue eyes that flickered,
the strands of blonde that threatened to fall as he craned his head in curiosity.

[ .. ? … ]
(a low pitch again.)

And the person’s expression broke —
something that looked like he was deeply concentrated.

No.
There was a struggle.
The way their eyes threatened to shut themselves tight, confusion twisting their lips.

[ ?????? … ??????? …… …. ??? ….. ?? ]
(the s tAtic dISTort e d inTO a lOW, dEEP tONE?
AS in visible needles ridd l ed
TWI Sted
his ne rves,

and Ratio cl enched his jaw ti ghtly to re tain hi s own compo su r e.]

“I’m sorry,” Aventurine gave a faint, apologetic smile. “I don’t think I’ll be able to answer the question…

… it’s a little hard to hear.”

paroxysm,

It took ten minutes.

Ten minutes to reach back to his office, and ten minutes for the nerves to dial back down to the intensity of being barely and occasionally pricked by needles. Though true to his expectations, it took the Gambler no time to superficially regain his usual bravado, especially when Aventurine relieved a dramatic sigh while he made himself comfortable on Ratio’s office couch as per usual.

“Testing me only, Doctor?” Aventurine inquired with a lazy hum. “I’m not sure if I should be happy about this special treatment, or be sorely disappointed that I didn’t get to be the one thinking of the prompts.”

“Feel neither,” Ratio stated blandly as he stood at his desk, rummaging through the research papers together that he had left in an organized mess prior to the session. “In a few hours, we’re going to conduct the same experiment, but alternate — meaning that you will be the one with the prompts, and I’ll be reciting out your thoughts.”

There was a small laugh.

“Reciting my thoughts?” Aventurine shot him a sly grin. “Oh, I can already imagine it now, Doctor.”

Ratio’s eye twitched.

Imagine him skipping every answer, Ratio figured what Aventurine had meant.

By this point, it was a known fact between them that Ratio still hadn’t managed to decipher Aventurine’s thoughts clearly, no matter how hard he tried tuning in on it. Any broken words he had somehow grasped would all quickly fall back into the hissing noise, not to mention how it would even take Ratio by surprise on occasions — sparing him no chance to properly hold onto the 'channel' in time.

Yet for the Gambler, he allegedly mentioned an opposite ordeal.

Too loud.

Too many thoughts.

Like a room full of radios —
a chaotic mess of everything, yet nothing all at once.

The only thing Ratio noted was Aventurine’s earlier observation during their session. Something about how his thoughts tuned down when Ratio himself was concentrating on answering the prompts in his head.

Tuning down as he concentrated… his thoughts were preoccupied.

Turning back up afterwards to the same level of loudness… his thoughts were unrestrained.

Pitches…

Pitches?

Right.

Ratio had heard it earlier.

The pitch in the static that fell into strangely low distortions for a few moments.

“Gambler.”

Aventurine turned his head before he made a knowing look.

“Oh?” Aventurine blinked curiously, obliging to Ratio’s wordless instructions as he stood up and brought himself to the desk where Ratio stood. “Did the great Doctor Veritas Ratio finally make a breakthrough?”

“Perhaps. Stand right there,” Ratio instructed, and Aventurine moved to stand right beside him. “Now turn around.”

[ . . . . ]
— as he expected, his heart started to race.

“What? Are you going to dip your hand in an ice bucket again?” Aventurine joked, turning around until his back faced Ratio. “Though, from the looks of it, I highly doubt you’d have an ice bucket lying around here. I wonder — what kind of other tests do you have in mind? Are you going to gauge whatever tuning you were thinking about? Should I concentrate on something? Or are you —”

“You talk a lot when you’re nervous.”

[ ……………………… ]
Ratio closed his eyes,
and took a deep breath,
feeling the needles pick at him harder.

Aventurine merely hummed.

“And you force your thoughts to get quieter whenever you try to hide something from me. Perhaps the nervousness right now is because of you.”

“I’m very certain that this doesn’t belong to me, Gambler,” Ratio said, feeling his heart shake slightly as he quietly pulled out a drawer from his desk. “Although, if it eases you, I’m only doing something very simple. It won’t harm you or me in any way.”

“I know that.”

“Do you?”

His stomach churned uncomfortably.

Anxious.

Ratio looked down at the gloved fingers that twitched at Aventurine’s side.

No matter how reckless he was, or how much of a show Aventurine displayed, moments like these reminded Ratio how Aventurine was still human to a fault.

“You’re uneasy,” Ratio said, curling his own fingers in and retracting his hand away from the desk. “We can disregard this. I can test my hypothesis tomorrow during our —”

“How about a negotiation?”

The brisk words interrupted Ratio from continuing further, allowing the storm outside to overshadow his train of thought, and soon, the murmur from the latter.

“I want to test a personal hypothesis as well.”

Ratio tipped his head.

A personal hypothesis? What would that be?

[ …………………….. ]

Right.

Ratio figured Aventurine wasn’t going to be keen on him being privy to it, judging by the way Aventurine’s shoulders stiffened in response to his mental inquiry.

Ratio sighed as he reached into his drawer to grasp for something.

“Only if it’s a reasonable request, Gambler.”

“It’s a simple question — that reasonable enough?”

“Knowing you, I have my skepticism.”

A laugh.

Ratio huffed at the latter. “Go ahead and ask first.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to go first?”

“It’ll be better if you do.”

[ . . . . … ? …. .. . ]
(the pitch dropped slightly.
perhaps, Ratio could observe it like this.)

The silence washed in, giving them a moment to listen to the drumming along the walls of the office. The dull ambiance of the gray trickled in, filtering the vibrance of the world into a muted shade of gray.

In a tacit understanding — as if Aventurine had peered into his thoughts that Ratio had attempted to quell, Aventurine began to gather the long strands of hair that fell along his back. The motion was slow, yet deliberate, as he brought them forth onto his shoulders to leave the back of his neck exposed.

A permission granted.

“Ratio,” Aventurine murmured, the next breath hardly audible underneath the weight of the rain. “Can you think about the first person that comes to mind?”

… What?

Ratio blinked, taken aback.

“That’s the same question from earlier.”

“I’m only curious as to why the answer was so hard to hear, compared to the other questions.”

“And what did you hear exactly?” Ratio inquired.

[ ……………………………………………………………………………………………. ]
une a s e.
(Ratio could hear Aventurine opting for silence.)

Interesting.

Earlier, Aventurine had skipped this specific question, explaining that the — his — thoughts were undecipherable and loud. Whatever that meant.

“Part of it was true, y’know,” Aventurine said, or rather replied, to his mental monologue. “I’m sure you’d find a loud, garbling radio undecipherable, no?”

What an analogy.

Ratio scoffed, petulant to the silvery laugh.

“That was what it was, Doctor.” Aventurine gestured with a wave of a hand. “Whatever was in your head, it was nothing but a garbled, incoherent mess — as if too many things were playing all at once. It came to the point where I could barely pick up the answer. After all, I’m sure that you wouldn’t be able to listen to one song if ten different songs were playing all at once.

“Barely means you grasped onto something, Gambler.”

[ ……! !!!!! …………………..
……….. !!! ……
……………………
…………………… !! ………. ]
(high-pitched, right as his heart rate spiked up.)

“So you did hear something,” Ratio narrowed his eyes. “That was why you were nervous earlier.”

[ ……………………………………………………………
………………………………………………………………….. ……………
……………… ………………………………………………
…………………. ]

“Or am I wrong?”

“I see that you’re trying hard to interrogate me,” Aventurine replied. “From how I see it, you’re stalling. Perhaps, you’re afraid I’ll actually catch it this time. Right?”

“If I were afraid of you peering into my thoughts, I wouldn’t have volunteered to be your partner,” Ratio asserted, sweeping his eyes down to the blue earrings that dangled delicately in response to Aventurine barely turning his head to the side.

“Hm — Really now, Doctor?” Aventurine retorted. “Then, tell me: Which one of us is afraid right now?”

Which one of them was afraid?

What an absurd question.

This feeling of unease — the one that traveled through his bloodstream at this moment — wasn’t his. That, Ratio knew well, because he had never felt this before until the beginning of this experiment. Are you sure? — he could hear the static ask with a loud, distorted noise.

Are you sure?

The question lingered in his head, hand in hand with the perturbation that bothered him within his chest.

Are you sure?

Was he sure?

He had nothing to hide, at least, that was what he told himself.

No.

There was something he needed to know, at least.

(Not every gamble needs an audience. Just a couple of players. One winner, and one loser.)

“Off in your own world again, Doctor,” Aventurine interjected with a hum, and Ratio could hear him smile. “Well?”

Ratio frowned, then relented with a sigh.

“Fine.”

The first person that came to mind:
The person who first came to mind:

Someone who’d leave everything to chance; who’d considered high-risk methods in exchange for high rewards; displayed an aptitude to pull off a show of flamboyance and elaborate schemes with every lie and facade he dressed himself in; drawn to danger like a moth to a flame; and chased for results no matter what, because no matter what, he had always made it out alive.

Despite the wits, the shrewdness, the luck of things, he was still an incorrigible fool.

An incorrigible fool with more layers than Ratio could count — could even come to understand, despite how long they had known each other.
Despite their first meeting involving nothing but a singular bullet and a foolish game of Russian Roulette, Ratio only found himself more intrigued by him.

Curious.

Curious — huh.
Despite how long they had known each other,
despite the missions before and after Penacony,
the projects they had collaborated,
the moments they had within and outside of their work…

Yeah. Right.
For Aventurine to say Ratio knew him the best —
Ratio would have been a fool if he believed a lie like that.

(Or perhaps, Ratio had already been the fool.
After all, mistaking some of these feelings as curiosity was his first mistake.)

[ …. ???? . . . . …… ???? ….. ]
(low-pitched.)

Ratio’s lips twitched knowingly.

[ .. !!! .. . . . !!! ]
(high- pitched.)

“Col—d!”

A gasp cracked through the air, followed by a jolt and a gloved hand flying to the back of his neck right as Ratio retracted his hand away in time for Aventurine to snap over at him with wide eyes.

“What — What was that?” Aventurine stammered, and Ratio’s brow lifted as he observed the flustered expression.

So red.

[ !!!!!! … .. ?????? …. ?? !! … ]
(the static distorted itself drastically — nothing but a mess of highs and lows, while Aventurine’s face grew more bashful when he couldn’t stop himself from smiling in amusement.)

“Ratio.”

“I apologize,” Ratio replied, barely earnest, as he cleared his throat and raised his chalk. “I only touched the back of your neck with this to gauge something.”

Aventurine shot a puzzled look. “And that is?”

“Despite how well you hide your thoughts, the static still reacts from certain emotions,” Ratio explained. “You know how pitches sound, correct?”

“Yes…”

Ratio continued, “The lower the pitch, the more confused or curious you are. The higher the pitch, the more shocked.”

[ … ???? … ? ..?? ]

“Just like right now. You’re confused.”

Aventurine scoffed, narrowing his eyes as he rubbed his neck.

“Then earlier, when you touched me with the chalk… What did you hear?”

“A cacophony of both,” Ratio stated matter-of-factly, and returned the chalk to the drawer. “Which seems aligned with how you were startled — either from the touch, how cold the chalk was, or both.”

Aventurine clicked his tongue, though underwhelmed by the persisting fluster painting his face as he removed his hand from his neck and narrowed his eyes.

“So my thoughts react to how I feel in certain moments. But, I highly doubt that there’s anyone else, or at all, that you mentioned having a similar case to mine. So, therefore, what good use of information is that?”

“Anything is information. Especially if it’s you,” Ratio said. “It may seem insignificant to you, but it is significant to me — that is,” Ratio tipped his head with a knowing smile. “Knowing how reactive you actually are.”

[ ….. . . ……. . . ………. ]

“Hah —

Hahaha!”

Aventurine’s laugh rang through his ears, overpowering the thrums of the rain as Ratio saw a long stretch of a smile grinning at him in a mixture of amusement and disbelief.

“How absurd, dear Doctor,” Aventurine retorted, leaning against the edge of the desk and crossing his arms while turning his head to face Ratio more clearly. “Sure — you can catch me when I’m surprised or confused with these differences in pitches. But, you can already read me based on my emotions, quote-on-quote. So, that’s to say —”

“That’s to say that I can confirm whether an emotion is mine or yours. Like, for example —” Ratio leaned closer until he could hear the hitch of Aventurine’s breath as he murmured in Aventurine’s ear.

“ — I can tell which one of us is afraid right now.”

[ … !….. !………. ]
(a faint, sharp distortion.

just as faint

as Aventurine’s

quiet breath.)

“Then, riddle me this,” Aventurine whispered as he trailed his fingertips along the edge of Ratio’s lab coat — and eventually rested his gloved hand on Ratio’s shoulder.

“Tell me what I’m afraid of, Ratio.”

Ratio ruminated quietly as he gazed at the blue earring swaying, tracing the outlines of Aventurine’s ear.

“If you were afraid of me reading your thoughts, then you wouldn’t have accepted me as your partner,” Ratio deliberated. “Well, not that you have to worry about me reading your thoughts, as we’re both aware of the fact that I’m unable to. But, based on the very few times where you’ve asked me what I’ve heard or felt, along with your defensiveness earlier — there’s something you don’t want me to know. Correct?”

[ ……… ]

Aventurine managed a half-cracked scoff under his breath.

Had they not been affected by the Curio, Ratio would have assumed Aventurine was more than upset by this.
But, with this effect,
it didn’t feel like the case.
At least, that was what his instincts and the faint pensive noise said.

“There’s something you don’t want me to know, too,” Aventurine remarked. “The way your thoughts get unnaturally quiet, or too loud to hide whatever it is you try to suppress what’s in your head — if I’m afraid, then you are too.”

Ratio scoffed against Aventurine’s ear.

“Then recite to me exactly what you heard when I answered your question.”

[ .. … . . …. .. .. . . . . . ]
(the static rose in volume.)

And something gR ASPeD, and s QUee z Ed his heart TIGHTLY.

The storm was loud.

Loud enough to overshadow the noise, the silence that stretched thin between them, the faint murmur that Ratio couldn’t hear clearly — or at all — as he only caught the vague sounds of a syllable whispered in his ear.

(… m … e ..…)

(h i S H E A R T P O U ND E D I NT E N S E LY. )

A thunder struck right as Ratio opened his mouth and pulled away, ready to ask for clarification. However, Aventurine’s hand pushed him even further, just enough for Aventurine to slink away from the desk and regain the inches of distance.

“Well, Doctor! Seems like we both got what we wanted. Glad we could conclude this in a win-win situation.”

Ratio furrowed his brows intensely as he saw Aventurine crane his head at him to show him a knowing stare.

A win-win situation…

What exactly did you win?

Ratio wanted to ask, but Aventurine interrupted his intentions sharply when he displayed the time on his phone screen to Ratio.

“I’m afraid that we have another matter to attend to, Doctor.”

Aventurine shot him a sly grin, and Ratio scoffed.

my quiet soliloquy,

(reversed. II.)

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--. .- -- -... .-.. . .-. --..-- / .-- .... . .-. . / .- .-. . / -.-- --- ..- ..--..

.. - / .... ..- .-. - .-.-.- / .. - / .... ..- .-. - / .. - / .... ..- .-. - .-.-.-

- .... . / .-- .- -.-- / - .... . / ... ..- -.. -.. . -. / .-- .- ...- . / --- ..-. / .-. . .-.. .. . ..-. / ... - .-. ..- -.-. -.- / -- . .-.-.- / - .... . / .-- .- -.-- / - .... . / ... ..- -.. -.. . -. / .-- . .. --. .... - / --- ..-. / --. .-. .- - .. - ..- -.. . / - --- / -... . / -.-. --- -. ... -.-. .. --- ..- ... / . -. --- ..- --. .... / - --- / .... . .- .-. / .... .. -- .-.-.- / - .... . / .-- .- -.-- / - .... . / ... ..- -.. -.. . -. / .--. .-. . ... ... ..- .-. . / .--. .- .. -. . -.. / -- -.-- / . -.-- . ... / - --- / - .... . / .--. --- .. -. - / - .... .- - / .. - / .... ..- .-. - .-.-.-

.-- .... .- - / .- / .-. . .-.. .. . ..-. .-.-.-

.-..-. --. --- --- -.. / -- --- .-. -. .. -. --. --..-- .-..-. / .. / ... -- .. .-.. . -.. --..-- / ..- .-. --. .. -. --. / -- -.-- ... . .-.. ..-. / - --- / -. --- - / -... .. - . / -.. --- .-- -. / .- ... / .. / .-. .- .. ... . -.. / -- -.-- / -... .-.. . . -.. .. -. --. --..-- / ... .... .- -.- .. -. --. / .- .-. -- / - --- / - .... . / ..-. .- .. -. - . ... - / .-.. .. --. .... - / .. -. / - .... . / ... -.- -.-- .-.-.- / .-..-. -.-- --- ..- / .-- --- ..- .-.. -.. -. .-..-. - / -... . .-.. .. . ...- . / .... --- .-- / -... .-. .. --. .... - / .- -. -.. / ... ..- -. -. -.-- / .. - / .. ... / - --- -.. .- -.-- --..-- / -.. --- -.-. - --- .-. .-.-.- .-..-.

.. - / .... ..- .-. - / .. - / .... ..- .-. - / .. - / .... ..- .-. - .-.-.-

.--. .-.. . .- ... . / -.- . . .--. / - .- .-.. -.- .. -. --. / - --- / -- . / ..- -. - .. .-.. / .. / ..-. .- .-.. .-.. / .- ... .-.. . . .--. .-.-.-

-.--. .--. / .-.. / . / .- / ... / . / -.-. / --- / -- / . / .- / -. / -.. / .... / --- / .-.. / -.. / -- / . / ..- / -. / - / .. / .-.. / .. / ..-. / .- / .-.. / .-.. / .- / ... / .-.. / . / -.--.-

826,

On the table laid a glass container that held a small yet eeringly vibrant red plant, its appearance akin to what could be close to that of a strange anemone. While Ratio held onto its associated files, Aventurine peered down at the sample, inspecting it closely with the piqued curiosity of a cat assessing an unknown, tiny creature.

“What an interesting-looking flower,” Aventurine murmured in thought. “The red color gives me the shivers from just looking at it.”

“People say the shades of it look strikingly close to fresh blood,” Ratio explained. “FL-826. It’s a flower with unnatural healing properties — able to cure a majority of illnesses and injuries within a short period of time after intake.”

“And that includes curing things such as fevers and a broken leg?”

“Precisely. However, due to its nature, the flowers only bloom during this time of the season. And while it does possess benefits, it also has a defense mechanism where, if handled or consumed improperly, it becomes a dangerous hallucinogen.”

“So that’s why it’s in a container,” Aventurine mused before there was a hum from a hologram that stood beside them, observing.

“While there haven’t been any major incidents regarding FL-826, there have been quite a few close calls,” Jade chimed in, capturing both of their attentions. “The researchers over at Planet [XXX] are hoping to seek out assistance with the development of the medicine. Hence, the Intelligentsia Guild and IPC are looking to collaborate and send you two as representatives for the project. The trip will last for a few months — give or take — but may change depending on the circumstances.”

Ratio furrowed his brows deeply in thought, skimming his eyes at the bandages peeking underneath Aventurine’s sleeve for a moment.

“I’m willing to collaborate, considering that I’ve been planning to schedule my trip a week from now —”

[ . . ? ? ? . . . ]
(t he stati c crackled…?)

“However, based on Aventurine’s current conditions, it’d be wise if he stays in Pier Point to recov—”

[ ……………………………???????????????????????………………………
…………… ???????????????????????????????…………… ????????????????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!????????????????????????????………………….. ]
(a lOU D HI SS—)

A discreet nudge against his arm interrupted him sharply, making Ratio shoot the man beside him a glare at the offense. But instead, Aventurine plastered an ingenuous expression as he feigned innocence and gazed down simply at the red flower within the container.

“I believe it’ll be worth going to investigate for opportunities,” Aventurine stated, casually resting his hand on top of the glass. “Considering that they were seeking us out, I’m sure they’ll need a reliable sponsor for their project. No? Besides,” Aventurine glanced over at Ratio. “What’s the worst that can happen?”

Ratio clicked his tongue, but before the words could leave him, Jade’s hum interjected him faster.

“Regarding safety concerns, the city you will be staying in should pose no dangers for the duration of your stay — that is, if all things go smoothly,” Jade smiled a silvery one. “In fact, if the project is a success, Aventurine would be able to use it to recover from his own injuries fully.”

Ratio opened his mouth to protes—

[ A L OU D S C REEEEE C H

ST R UCK HI S HEA D ,
F O RCIN G HIM
T O S H U T

H I S M O U TH ]

“Thank you, Ma’dam Jade,” Aventurine exchanged a smile back. “Since the trip will be a week from now — apparently — Ratio and I will catch up and work out the specifics.”

“Thank you, child. Please do let me know if you have any updates.”

The S TI N GIN G N O ISESIN H IS HEAD forced Ratio to clench his jaw tightly, heart almost lurching to his throat as the hologram eventually dissipated into thin air, leaving the two of them in the room with the container of the flower.

Ratio stared down at the latter, who didn’t meet his eyes as he picked up the container.

“FL-826,” Aventurine hummed. “It really is such a strange-looking thing. Isn’t it?”

Ratio narrowed his eyes, the S TATIC relenting just enough to allow him to breathe and consider speaking now.

But the way his gUTs TWISTED vIoLENTLY
left a sickening feeling.
As if Aventurine had already peered inside his head.

“You didn’t have to stop me earlier, Gambler,” Ratio began. “There was a valid excuse for you to stay here in Pier Point instead of being sent out. You’re still not fully recovered, and if you were to rile up your wound while —”

“I’m fine, Doctor,” Aventurine answered, and hastily added. “Besides, I’m kind of bored doing paperwork all day. A change of pace would be nice.”

Ratio’s lips twisted into a thin line.

“The reason why you volunteered to test for the Curio in the first place was that you wanted to stay in Pier Point and fully recover from your injuries. It hasn’t been long since we started the test, so why are you changing your mind now?”

Aventurine stiffened.

[ ………………………………………………………………………………………….. ]
Aventurine remained quiet, his face twisting as if he couldn’t find anything to say.
(And Ratio’s own heart rACED INTENSELy, until Ratio could feel the sweat down his neck.)

Would that mean that
Aventurine wasn’t given a choice in the first place?

Ratio swallowed the instinct to give a frustrated swear.

“I’ll send a text to Jade later, and we can discuss an alternative so you’ll be able to stay in —”

“I offered up.”

Ratio’s mouth halted.

Aventurine —

What?

Since when?

“Since I attended a meeting with Jade recently, where they were seeking the IPC’s funding,” Aventurine answered, the corner of his eye twitching. “I offered to be the representative for the IPC while we were discussing a potential collaboration with the Intelligentsia Guild.”

Ratio knitted his brows in disbelief.

Aventurine offered himself up? That didn’t make any sense.

“I don’t understand. Why did you change your mind about staying in Pier Point?”

There was an evident hesitation in Aventurine’s pause, though masked by his displayed appearance of looking enamored by the red flower in his hand.

“The city is —”

“The city is safe, but the place you were in for your last mission was considered safe until you ended up getting ambushed, Aventurine. One wrong move — mess up your arm — and you’ll be back in the hospital bed again. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

However, his words garnered him a feeling that was SUFFOCATING.
A tight feeling grew within his throat and chest with an emotion
that began to boil underneath his chest.

This time, Aventurine turned to glare at Ratio — diamond pupils staring sharply at him.

“Ratio, I’m not fragile. I’ve survived time and time again — you already know this by now,” Aventurine stated, tone frigid as his fingers nearly dug into the container. “Nothing’s going to happen in Planet [XXX].”

The emotion, however, stirred his nerves further — worsening his own emotions as Ratio tried to cage his frustrations (which felt more amplified than usual).

“The last thing you need right now is to land yourself in a dire situation because of another distress, or your arm —”

“My arm. Is fine.”

A small part of his rational mind told Ratio that he needed to take a breath to calm down. But the [ SCRE AM I NG S T A TI C ] and this violent emotion stirred his own frustration, further
and further.

“If anything, considering my injury, I can volunteer to be a test subject for the medici—”

“I’m not letting you become a test subject and make you constantly ingest the flower when it’s still under development — not when there are harmful consequences to improperly taking it.”

“What? It has the same effects as a hallucinogen. If you think I can’t handle some hallu—”

Ratio sharply cut him off, narrowing his eyes. “If the reason why you’re offering up to be a representative is for the medicine, then I will send you the medicine as soon as it’s successfully —”

“Why are you so adamant about me not going?” Aventurine asked. “Don’t tell me you still detest me.”

This time, Aventurine’s demeanor was void of its usual flamboyance, the words flat yet brittle, and Ratio himself realized how much more difficult it was to calm his ragged breaths.

Detest — that was the word they used back at Penacony a year ago. The word that was used to describe their “relationship” at that time. The acting. The betrayal. And yet despite the note he had given him, the conversations thereafter…

S OM ETHI NG ST R UC K HIM HARS HLY,
A N D W REN CHED HIS HEA RT .
WASITHISOWNFRUSTRATION?ORWASITTHEGAMBLER’SANGER?

C a n’T bREATHE.

Whoever’s anger it was — it drove him to close the gap between them as he stared down at Aventurine’s unreadable expression that couldn’t hold back from twisting the same way Ratio’s face was.

“Do you know what I heard that day when you called me, Aventurine?” Ratio gritted his teeth.

You wouldn’t believe how bright and sunny it is today, Doctor — followed by a pathetic attempt at a careless laugh.

Then —

“I heard nothing,” Ratio stated. “All I heard was nothing coming out of your mouth when I tried to talk to you and ask you what happened. You know what I did hear, though? I heard a storm. And then, I heard your team screaming over the phone that you were losing too much blood.”

(“D…oct or…
it… h urt…s…”)

His hand moved faster than his rationality, grabbing onto Aventurine’s wrist and raising it to force Aventurine to look at the bandages when the sleeve of Aventurine’s shirt fell.

Aventurine stiffened, returning the same scowl Ratio made.

“Do you really want a second part to this? What’s next? Your other arm? Your head? Or do you want to keep jumping to the conclusions that I detest you?”

“Then, when were you going to tell me that you were leaving?” Aventurine hissed, eyes nearly glowing in accusation. “Were you planning to tell me soon? Or were you going to leave without saying a single word? Huh?”

This time, Ratio halted — and he came to realize Aventurine’s trembling arm in his grasp.

“I —”

was planning to tell you soon…

And that was it.

The answer that Ratio tried to speak did not come. Rather, Ratio found it difficult to consider the answer when his own blood, the STATIC, was boiling so much that it was almost overwhelming.

(That was the consequence of them sharing thoughts and emotions. The touch — Ratio’s hand around Aventurine’s wrist — only proved to make things worse when his, both, of their breaths became jagged intensely under the pressures of their clashing emotions.)

[ yO u … d ID… .N ‘T …. s A Y….
A nY

THi

n g . . .. .

w h Y? ]

C a n’T bREATHE.

“You’re saying that I haven’t said anything when you’re the one who didn’t say anything either, Doctor,” Aventurine said, and Ratio saw an arm moving behind his back. “I wasn’t informed until just earlier that you were planning to go on a trip for almost half a year. But for some reason, you decided to volunteer as my partner for this…”

Soon, Aventurine scoffed in indignation. “Were you going to tell me at some point, or were you just going to wait until this Curio ends this week to tell me?”

(“… R… a…tio…
I’m… a l i ttl e

t… i r e d…”)

Tension knotted itself within Ratio’s nerves as Ratio stared at the stubborn glare.

“There wasn’t a determinable duration for this Curi—”

“There isn’t, but I highly doubted you would want to juggle between two projects at once,” Aventurine smiled wryly. “That only means you suspected this Curio was going to end soon.

That’s why you didn’t say anything.

Right?”

(“… Aventurine?
Aventurine!
I know you’re still there!
What’s going on?

Answer me!”)

Ratio gritted his teeth,
agitation riling his nerves further as
Aventurine visibly clenched his jaw tight.

c a n ‘t b r E A t h e .
w HA t w a s t h i s E M o t i o n ?

“Aven—”

[ stopstopsotSTOPSTOPSTOP …. . . .
. . ..I . .. .
D ON… T TH IN K
AB OUT IT DONTTHINKABOUTITSTOPSTOPSTOP ]

Sweat trailed down the back of his neck as Ratio tried to suck air through his teeth, only to feel the sickening dread in the pits of his stomach when Aventurine suddenly swept his eyes away and trembled madly.

Ratio himself realized his own nerves were trembling under the pressure, as the STATIC sCREAMED IN HIS HEAD UNTIL IT HU R T.

Something was wrong. Something was terribly wrong.

“Aven—”

(“Get the Director to the hospital!
Was the Director calling someone? Ah!
Doctor Ratio! I — I don’t know what happened.
There was an attack, and
Director Aventurine, he
got caught in it.”)

Aventurine’s wrist jerked out of his grasp, leaving Ratio’s hand empty as he pulled away and averted his stare. However, the absence of touch only made Ratio realize how his own hand was shaking, followed by the chills running down his back.

This wasn’t his own emotion. Ratio was certain of it.

[ wHATS—WR—ME—WHA—TS—-STOP….STOPTHINK— ]

“Fine. Fine,” Aventurine snipped sharply, his mouth moving hastily. “You can send me the medicine whenever it’s done developing. I only thought of the opportunities that came with the project. Nothing more. Nothing less. But, since the doctor’s note strongly opposes this, it can’t be helped. I’ll give Jade a heads-up tomorrow. I’m sure she’ll find another representative quickly.”

[STOPSTOPSTSTOPSTO STOPS TST
OPSTOPSTO PTHINKING……………………wHATsWRong…………………
…………………………….ST……wITHME……….]

“Why do I care so much about you leaving anyway?”

[ STOPSTOSPTOSPTOSPOTPS DONTTHINDONTTHINKDONTTHINKSTOPFEELINGLIKETHISSTOP STOP STOP]

Ratio’s skin burned almost feverishly as guilt surfaced and stung within his throat. Ratio held back the urge to pinch his nose and desperately inhale for air — only trying to subdue whatever he could internally.

However, this dread…

(Ratio himself didn’t say anything yet,
because if he did,
then he wouldn’t know what to do
if he couldn’t stop himself from selfishly convincing Aventurine
to come with him.

Only to end up getting hurt again.)

[WHyDoyOUCARESOMUCHABOUTHIMLEAVINGISSOMETHINGWRONGWITHYOUWHATS—]

“Aventurine, I —”

“Ratio,” Aventurine’s voice nearly cracked, and his fingers grabbed tightly onto his own bandaged arm in distress. “Can you just — just stop thinking for five seconds —!”

Before he could say anything to that, a knock interrupted them, causing both of them to look over and see Margaret tentatively peering in when she opened the door.

“Doctor Ratio. Director Aventurine,” Margaret said, but trailed off when she seemed to assess the tension in the air. “I apologize. Is now a bad time?’

“No,” Aventurine answered hastily, as he plastered a smile and walked past Ratio. “We just finished up our meeting. So, we’re ready for the next test.”

Then, Aventurine turned at Ratio with a hum.

“Right, Ratio?”

Ratio gritted his teeth.

[…….s…Top…T…HINKING…]

forbode,

“This’ll be similar to earlier’s test session, but reversed. Director Aventurine, I’ll be showing you a few pictures on your tablet. Please describe them in your head and refrain from verbally answering out loud. As for Doctor Ratio, you’ll answer based on what you hear. If you’re unable to answer, then you may skip.”

Ratio nodded briefly in confirmation. But a glance over at the observation glass, and he saw Aventurine immediately look down at his tablet instead — only offering Ratio and Margaret a curt nod.

[ .S……….SS………s……….ssssss……………….. ]
tHe pa iN sPLIn t eRED thRoughOut hIS bODy —
tHIS nUMBING, aCHING Pa iN?

The emotions hadn’t alleviated yet, nor did the vehement static stop crackling in his head — a dissonance of nothing but broken syllables and harsh distortion of crepitating sounds. And based on the way they hadn’t exchanged a direct look since then, it was clear to Ratio how Aventurine had no interest in talking to him.

Like any other human, Ratio knew there were moments where Aventurine would seethe quietly in his anger, although he had effortlessly displayed otherwise with his usual facade and constant smile. But, right now, Ratio discovered that —

— it Hurt.

The way his heart gnawed at itself, clawed at his chest, wrenching his gut. If this was a test of resilience, it truly, truly tested him.

If Aventurine was feeling this —
this angry at him —

[ …………..!!!!!!!!. …… S ………T………SS…………………..
HHHHHHH……!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! C…….AL…….
DO……..W…………

…

……

…. ]

Margaret cleared her throat, then swiped her own tablet.

“First one, whenever you two are ready.”

Ratio balled his fist underneath the table.

Had things gone differently with their last conversation, maybe he’d see Aventurine smugly smiling at him through the glass, and shooting him a look as if he effectively predicted how this test session was going to go.

Ratio knew how it was going to go as well. Just not like this —

“I don’t hear anyth—”

[ Apple. ]

What?

Ratio snapped over to the glass, stunned with confusion stinging his nerves while Aventurine remained staring down at his tablet.

That

was so

clear.

Why was Aventurine’s mind suddenly so clear?

In fact, the static, the distortions, were nearly gone.

The inner voice disappeared and quieted itself.

So, why was this feeling getting

WORSE?

“Doctor Ratio?”

Broken out of his stupor, Ratio fought the urge to grimace at the invisible, strangling hold on his neck as he turned back to Margaret.

“Apple.”

Thankfully unaware, Margaret nodded.

Must be correct.

Next:
[ Bat. ]
“Bat.”

Next:
[ Stool. ]
“Stool.”

Next:
[ Boo k. ]
“Book.”

Next:
[ Wo l f. ]
“Wolf.”

Margaret nodded in approval, jotting down notes quickly on her clipboard before she swiped her tablet.

“How clear were Director Aventurine’s thoughts at the time?”

“Clear.” The clearest it had ever been since the start of this entire test. Why?

Why?

“Then, shall we continue the next portion?”

Ratio narrowed his eyes, fully turning his head to stare at Aventurine, who — this time — tore away from his tablet to look back at Margaret with an unreadable curve of his lips.

“I’m ready to continue,” Aventurine said.

“Go ahead, Margaret,” Ratio said, tentative as doubt seeped in further when Aventurine dragged his stare back into his tablet, and propped his face on his hand in a way that covered the majority of Aventurine’s face from his view.

[ sT—
oP L — oo K
iNg ]

(broken. the voice cut itself
on a n d o ff .
a Nd th e p a in StABB e d in to hi m.
what was hAp pEn ing?)

“I’ll give a couple of questions now. Try to recite what you hear from Director Aventurine as best as you can, and if you are unable to answer the question, you can skip,” Margaret swiped her tablet. “Now…”

“Think of the last meal you had without each other. What was the last thing Director Aventurine ate?”

[ Fros t w e a v e S al mon bREa d. ]
(wHy diD HIS H EAd hURT?
W hy D ID th a t feel like A Lie?)

“… Frostweave Salmon Bread.”

Something was wrong.

“Doctor Ratio? Are you okay?”

“You — tell me,” Ratio breathed out raggedly from the throbbing ache in his head, turning to the man on the other side of the glass. “Aventurine.”

“I am fine to continue, Doctor,” Aventurine spoke, his voice rigid as he visibly took in a deep inhale and brought his eyes to barely meet Ratio’s from the gaps in between Aventurine’s fingers on his face. “Unless you want to give up right now.”

Ratio held strong doubts about the first sentence in particular, more so when he began to hear a mental wall metaphorically crack, and the static — that he assumed Aventurine had been attempting to suppress — slowly began to leak back into his head again.

There was a stubborn expression within Aventurine’s smile, and the purple-blue eyes that began to sharpen the longer Ratio was skeptical.

With a deep breath, Ratio soon exhaled and turned back to his assistant. “You can continue, Margaret.”

‘Why do I care so much about you leaving?’

“Then,” Margaret murmured, quietly confused.

“What is a moment where Director Aventurine was happy?”

Happy?
The last time Aventurine was happy —

[ WHeN I wa tc HED a MOVI e LASt WEEK ]
(A sharp, quick answe r, as the sTAtIC BEGAN TO HISS TO PREVENT HIM FROM THINKING.)

“When he went to —” A deep breath. “— watch a movie last week.”

“Is that correct, Director Aventurine?”

“Yes.”

Something was wrong something was…

“Then, the next.” Margaret flicked on her tablet.

“What is something that comforts Director Aventurine?”

Something was terribly wrong.

“I skip this —”

[ PILLOWS. BLANKETS. BED. S L EEP.
SLEEPING. COMFORTABLE. GOING T O

SLEEP.
(STO—P—THIN…)]

Something was wrong something was wrong something was terribly wrong.

“Sleep—ing,” Ratio gritted his teeth, his fingers clenching tightly as he attempted to swallow down the tension in his throat. Flickering his eyes over to Aventurine, he saw the latter now resting his forehead in his palm as he continued to stare down at the table. “He thinks… sleeping is comfortable.”

The lie statement was difficult, almost painful, to say after a sharp pang struck him thereafter, and at this point, a part of Ratio figured that he needed to end this session —

“He’s correct,” Aventurine spoke up abruptly, interrupting his train of thought. “I’m ready for the next question.”

Margaret cautiously looked at Ratio, and after another deep breath, Ratio nodded.

“Go ahead, Margaret.”

“Continuing to the last question then,” Margaret murmured. “Recite whatever you hear, Doctor Ratio. As for Director Aventurine:”

“What is the first person that comes to mind?”

The first person that came to mind.

Aventurine’s eyes flickered at him, and his thin smile fell.

— something was wrong.

Something was wrong, something was —

Pain struck him violently in the head as the static SCREAMED.

[ N……. O
ONE.

N O
O N E

CO M ES

TO

MIND.

NOONENOONENOONENO

STOPTHINKINGABOUTHIM—]

(SNAP)

It happened all at once.

His body jolted on its own as Ratio suddenly — desperately — breathed, air nearly drowning his lungs as the invisible hand suffocating him by the throat finally dissipated, granting him the liberty to breathe. All of the tension, the inexplicible anger, was ripped out of his body to the point of nearly leaving him disoriented. Attempting to gather his senses, Ratio came to realize how his veins were pulsing violently against his neck with sweat trailing right down his head.

“Doctor Ratio! Are you okay?”

Ratio ragged some sort of answer, more concerned with his partner as he urgently looked to see Aventurine’s head within his hands, gasping brokenly with fingers gripping into his hair.

It hit him, too.

“Aventurine,” Ratio called out wearily, as he pushed out of his chair and strode towards the glass.

Except about halfway through, Aventurine shot his eyes up at Ratio, giving Ratio a glimpse of a twisted, distressed expression before Aventurine abruptly pulled out of his own chair to leave through the door without sparing a single word.

“Aventurine!”

“Doctor Ratio? What’s —”

“I apologize, Margaret,” Ratio said brusquely as he rushed towards the door. “I’ll send you a detailed report later on other observations.”

The static was gone.

The cacophony of emotions was gone.

And as Ratio left the room to try and find him, the Gambler was gone.

The Curio had expired.

D-0,

3:55pm
1. Gambler. [Unread]
2. [Missed call]
3. Call me back. [Unread]

5:31pm
1. [Missed call]
2. [Missed call]
3. Whenever you are available, call me back. [Unread]
4. (Ratio’s ears rang.)
5. (What an eerie silence.)

11:29pm
1. (He’s at home, right?)
2. (I hope he ate dinner.)

didn’t make sense,

(reversed. VIII)

.. / -.. --- -. .----. - / -.- -. --- .-- / .-- .... -.-- / .. / --. --- - / ... --- / .- -. --. .-. -.-- .-.-.- / .. - .----. ... / -. --- - / .-.. .. -.- . / .-- . .----. ...- . / -... . . -. / .- .--. .- .-. - / ..-. .-. --- -- / . .- -.-. .... / --- - .... . .-. / -... . ..-. --- .-. . .-.-.- / ... --- / .-- .... -.-- / .-- .- ... / .. / ... --- / .. .-. .-. .- - .. --- -. .- .-.. .-.. -.-- / .- -. --. .-. -.-- / .- - / .... .. -- / .-.. . .- ...- .. -. --. ..--.. / .. - / -.. .. -.. -. .----. - / -- .- -.- . / ... . -. ... . .-.-.- / ... --- -- . - .... .. -. --. / .-- .- ... / .-- .-. --- -. --. / .-- .. - .... / -- . .-.-.- / - .... . / -... .- -. -.. .- --. . / -.-. .- -- . / --- ..-. ..-. .-.-.- / .. / -. . . -.. / - --- / .--. ..- - / .. - / -... .- -.-. -.- / --- -. / .- --. .- .. -. .-.-.- / .. -. . . -.. - --- .--. ..- - .. - -... .- -.-. -.- --- -. .- --. .- .. -. .-.-.- / .. -. . . -.. - --- .--. ..- - .. - -... .- -.-. -.- --- -. .-.-.- / .-- .... .- - - .... . .... . .-.. .-.. .. ... .-- .-. --- -. --. .-- .. - .... -- . .-- .... -.-- -.. .. -.. .. --. . - .- -. --. .-. -.-- .- - .... .. -- .-- .... -.-- -.. --- -. - .. .-- .- -. - .... .. -- - --- .-.. . .- ...- . -.--. -- . -.--.- ..--..

D-1,

10:05am
1. “Aventurine? He has meetings all day today. Why?”
2. “I just wanted to know. Thank you, Topaz.”
3. “Do you want me to let him know that you need him for something?”
4. “… No need.”

5:49pm
1. Aventurine. [Unread]
2. Call me back when you can. [Unread]

D-2,

12:43pm
1. “Doctor Ratio. I’ve prepared all the files for you in regards to your trip, as you’ve requested.”
2. “Thank you, Margaret. Are there any news on the IPC representative?”
3. “You mean Director Aventurine? Not from what I’ve heard… Do you need me to inquire him for you?”
4. “… No.”
5. Ratio pinched the bridge of his nose, and stared at himself from the glass of the red flower’s container.

11:59pm
1. [Missed call]

D-3,

3:12am
that night, Ratio couldn’t sleep.

sick in the pit of his stomach.

the silence lashing out.

gnawed at him.

phone soundless.

angry. seething.

the faint memory of the static surfaced.

his ears rang.

4:30am
1. [Read]

and i laughed,

(reversed. VI)

.. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / .... . .-.. .--. / -... ..- - / .-.. .- ..- --. .... .-.-.- / .-- .... .- - / .-- .- ... / .-- .-. --- -. --. / .-- .. - .... / -- . ..--.. / .. / .-.. .- ..- --. .... . -.. / .-- .. .-.. -.. .-.. -.-- / .- ... / .. / -... ..- .-. .. . -.. / -- -.-- / .--. .- .-.. -- ... / .. -. - --- / -- -.-- / . -.-- . ... .-.-.- / - --- / -... . -.-. --- -- . / ... --- / -.. . .--. . -. -.. . -. - ..--.. / ... --- / .-. . .-.. .. .- -. - ..--.. / .- - - .- -.-. .... . -.. ..--.. / .-- .... .- - / .-- .- ... / .-- .-. --- -. --. / .-- .. - .... / -- . ..--.. / .. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / .... . .-.. .--. / -... ..- - / .-.. .- ..- --. .... / .- - / - .... . / ... .. .-.. . -. -.-. . .-.-.- / - .... . / .-- .- -.-- / -- -.-- / .... .- -. -.. ... / ... .... --- --- -.- / .-- .... . -. / - .... . / -... .- -. -.. .- --. . ... / --- -. / -- -.-- / .- .-. -- / ..-. . .-.. .-.. / --- ..-. ..-. / .- --. .- .. -. .-.-.- / .-- .... -.-- / .-- --- -. .----. - / - .... . / -... .- -. -.. .- --. . ... / ... - .- -.-- / --- -. / -.-. --- .-. .-. . -.-. - .-.. -.-- ..--.. / .... --- .-- / -.. .. -.. / .... . / -.. --- / .. - / .- --. .- .. -. ..--.. / .. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / - .... .. -. -.- .-.-.- / .. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / - .... .. -. -.- .-.-.- / .-- .... .- - .----. ... / .-- .-. --- -. --. / .-- .. - .... / -- . ..--.. / .. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / .... . .- .-. / .- -. -.-- - .... .. -. --. .-.-.- / .. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / .... . .- .-. / .... .. -- .-.-.- / .. / -.. --- -. .----. - / .-- .- -. - / - --- / ... . . / .... .. -- .-.-.- / .. / -.. --- -. .----. - / .-- .- -. - / - --- / .... . .- .-. / .... .. -- .-.-.- / .... . .----. ... / .-.. . .- ...- .. -. --. / ... --- --- -. .-.-.- / .. / -.. --- -. .----. - / -.-. .- .-. . .-.-.- / .. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / - .... .. -. -.- .-.-.- / ... - --- .--. / - .... .. -. -.- .. -. --. .-.-.- / ... - --- .--. / ..-. . . .-.. .. -. --. .-.-.- / ... - --- .--. / -... . .. -. --. / .-.. .. -.- . / - .... .. ... .-.-.- / -.--. ... - --- .--. / -.-. .-. -.-- .. -. --. -.--.- .-.-.-

prevaricate,

Suffice to say, the silence within his mind was something Ratio could not adjust to.

There was a strange feeling that followed the absence, especially when he came to be very, very aware that the usual crackling static in his head — no matter how faint or loud — was entirely gone. The absence within his head, and now the fact that Aventurine hadn’t contacted him back or visited his office after the last couple of days, had him feeling guilty and on edge.

And today, the third day since the Curio’s expiration, Ratio wasn’t greeted by the particular person.

(The nerves, one he was familiar with throughout the Curio’s experiment, prickled within the back of his neck, on top of the twisting in his stomach when he’d glance at his phone to see his messages had been read, but yet to be responded.

His own sleeplessness and hunger were catching up to him — him barely being able to eat or sleep within the past few days because of the guilt and the bitter taste from the way their last conversation had ended.

There wasn’t any screeching static. No intense emotions that nauseated him, or agitated him, or kept him awake because of the effects of the Curio. But his stomach was still twisting uncomfortably, restlessly, the longer the silence — absence — persisted.

Ratio surmised that if this was what he himself was currently feeling, then Aventurine was feeling much, much worse than him.)

The vibrant red flower sitting within the cold glass container sat quietly on his desk and, underneath his tired scrutiny, felt Ratio’s fingers slide along the walls as he observed it.

FL-826.

A flower that could heal anything, maybe almost everything. Presumably, the medicine was as smooth as water and even left a lasting sweet taste on the tongue.

Hence, an accident was more than bound to happen.

The “close cases” — a couple of researchers and volunteers within the city were taken in quarantine after they suddenly showed erratic behaviors as if they saw something that terrified them. Then, it was later discovered that they had ingested the flower before it had been properly processed.

While the individuals were fortunately contained in time before they could cause a significant disruption, those who had attempted to restrain them didn’t exactly get away unscathed.

But considering the temptations to take a medicine that could cure the majority of ailments, who knew what would happen if someone was desperate enough to ignore all cautionary signs and inevitably cause another accident? More or less, a person who would have a much more violent behavior than the other close calls.

Hence, the last thing Ratio wanted was for Aventurine to get caught in another distressing situation again.

But, the thing was — Aventurine himself didn’t want to either, which was why he opted to volunteer to test the Curio in the first place to stay in Pier Point. So, the fact that Aventurine offered up on another long-term project like this…

If it hadn’t been for the Curio, Ratio would have never come to realize how angry and upset Aventurine was during their conversation. Was it because Ratio didn’t say anything about planning his own departure? Or the fact that Ratio tried to make him back off from the project and stay in Pier Point?

(‘Why do I care so much about you leaving?’)

The red flower faintly glowed.

whelve,

The tentative knock at the unfamiliar office door echoed.

Then, another knock, until he heard the click of the door opening, followed by the purple-blue eyes that tiredly dragged themselves up to look at him for a moment before —

“Wait, wait, wait,” Ratio hastily spoke, shoving his foot in between the gap to block the door from shutting him out. From the action, he received a frigid glare from the other side.

“Doctor,” Aventurine smiled, although the corners didn’t reach his eyes. “I didn’t realize we had an appointment.”

“We don’t,” Ratio replied — this time, grabbing onto the edge to stop Aventurine from pushing the door against his foot any further. “But I’m sure you know why I’m here.”

“Do I?”

“Five minutes of your time,” Ratio murmured with a deep frown. “Please.”

Aventurine’s face visibly faltered as he stared, his eyes flickering in hesitation and consideration.

The brief moment allowed Ratio to see the hints of dark circles underneath the mask of a concealer, along with the way Aventurine sluggishly averted his gaze, suggested that Aventurine indeed had not slept well or at all for the last few days.

Finally, the door was left unrestrained when the latter wordlessly disappeared from the gap of the door, allowing Ratio to enter through as Aventurine had already walked further down into his office to regain the distance.

“If you were trying to schedule another appointment regarding the conclusion of the Curio’s experiment, then you should’ve sent out an email,” Aventurine stated, keeping his back towards Ratio as he stood at his desk to peruse through the files and the floating screens around him. Ratio took one cursory glance to see that Aventurine had been reading about the project surrounding FL-826. “You didn’t have to come this far to visit my office.”

“I’m not here for that.”

“Then?”

“I’m only here for a conversation.”

“A text message suffices.”

“You would’ve ignored my message.”

“Perhaps that’s a sign.”

“And that’s why I’m here,” Ratio hesitated, pausing briefly as he furrowed his brows. “I’d rather… not let things go unresolved. Especially not when you’re still angry.”

The gloved fingers that had been typing on the screen froze momentarily, lasting a second enough for Ratio to guess that it was indeed the case, before the fingers went back to typing.

“I’m not angry,” Aventurine said before his voice was reduced to a mumble.

“I’m not angry at all.”

However, the tension stretched thinly between them — the air quiet enough that the sound of Aventurine’s earring nearly echoed when Aventurine turned his head slightly, as if debating (or reluctant) whether to look at him or not.

(For a moment, Ratio wondered what Aventurine was thinking about. Was it still pure static? Or were there coherent thoughts?)

Ratio frowned, trying to consider his next words until Aventurine exhaled a sharp breath.

“Since the Curio’s effect has ended, we aren’t doing any tests together. After all, you’ll have your hands tied with the project in… a couple of days from now. So,” Aventurine paused. “If you’re here to talk about the collaboration, I have a meeting set up with Jade to arrange and debrief another representative to —”

“I’m here to tell you to do otherwise.”

There was a soft thump when something was placed on the desk, making Aventurine look down to see a small black box sitting close to him.

“What’s this?”

“An apology,” Ratio explained as he slid the box closer to Aventurine before retracting his hand away to cross his arms. “I’ve been meaning to give this to you.”

Ratio watched the confusion twist along Aventurine’s face, followed by a mixture of conflict and curiosity within the blinks as Aventurine hesitantly took the box in his hand. The purple-blue shades flickered, processing for a second, before a smile of disbelief spread along his lips.

There was a hint of genuineness in that smile — and while only a very small smile, Ratio felt slightly relieved.

“You bought me two gold rings?” Aventurine murmured, tilting the box to inspect it like a rare specimen. “Are you trying to appease me with jewelry?”

Ratio tensed, then half-earnestly said, “It’s to bargain for another five minutes.”

Aventurine didn’t respond. Not verbally.

Instead, Aventurine only stared down at the rings gleaming within the box while merely raising his two fingers to Ratio.

Two minutes.

clack.

The next offering came in the form of a small vial that stood on the desk. When Aventurine looked away from the rings to the vial, Ratio brought his eyes up to observe the latter, whose face was concealed by the shadows of the continuing storm from outside the window.

Within the sounds of the rain pouring in heavily, Ratio cleared his throat.

“The last time we’ve properly collaborated on a long-term project was half a year ago, wasn’t it?” Ratio asked. “That’s why you offered to be a representative.”

Aventurine clutched tightly onto the box as he eyed the vial between them.

“If you’re here because of whatever I said, then you don’t need to worry. I’m aware of how irrational and ridiculous I was that day, so you —”

“I’m sorry,” Ratio spoke. “For not realizing your intentions. So, if you choose to, we can continue the test. And along with that, stay as a representative, and work with me.” Ratio took a deep breath in an attempt to quell the way his heart ramped uncomfortably with every word he said. “I’d — also like to continue working with you.”

Aventurine’s mouth opened, then quickly closed itself.

The air around Aventurine was enough to make Ratio tense and straighten his back, trying to figure out what was going through Aventurine’s mind as Aventurine brought the box down to the table and closed its lid.

“You had your reason for why you were strongly adamant about not having me go. So, you don’t have to try and —”

Ratio placed a hand on top of Aventurine’s hand right as Aventurine was about to slide to the box over to him, stopping him from returning it. Although Ratio only settled his hand very lightly on top to allow Aventurine the option to push him away.

Aventurine didn’t reject the touch, but he didn’t say anything at all. Instead, he only stared down at their hands.

Ratio couldn’t help but wonder what Aventurine was feeling at this moment. Was it still the same sense of unease and nerves that bundled within his chest until his heart ached? Or was it the nauseating emotion of anger that had yet to truly die out, while the static in his head crackled madly until his ears rang?

“I was strongly adamant because you wanted to stay in Pier Point to recover from your injuries,” Ratio stated, bringing his gaze down to the bandages peeking from underneath Aventurine’s sleeve. From the looks of it, the bandages were loose — too loose — that they barely hung around Aventurine’s arm. “I won’t lie and say that I don’t have some reservations about it. The least I want to happen is for you to end up in the hospital again because of the chaos that has gotten out of control.”

“But —”

“But the city is relatively safe for the most part. So, as Jade said, there shouldn’t be any dangers that pose a risk to us if everything is kept under control,” Ratio added. “Besides, you’ll be able to get the medicine right there and then for your injury, rather than wait for it to be delivered to you. And if the worst-case scenario happens, we have that as well.”

Aventurine’s brow twitched, the corner of his lip almost quirking upwards.

Almost, as Aventurine quietly scoffed and slightly shook his head.

“Sure. Yeah,” Aventurine mumbled. “But, regardless of some all-curing medicine, I’ve always been able to get out of situations one way or another. You already know this by now, Doctor. So with a mission like this, and whether or not I get hurt, it doesn’t really matter all that —”

“It matters to me.”

Aventurine paused, and his eyes went round when he turned his head to fully face Ratio, allowing Ratio to meet with the purple-blue eyes flickering intensely at him. While he couldn’t tell what Aventurine was possibly thinking about, he could remember the sounds of the static in his head.

Loud. Quiet.

Rising in pitch. Shocked.

Surprised, maybe.

Then —

Falling into the faint crackle of
whatever hidden thoughts Aventurine was having.

It was this reaction that made Ratio even more curious
about what Aventurine was thinking about,
and it was this reaction
that made Ratio realize the aching in his own chest from
the words he had said.

‘It matters to me.’
Because it’d be a lie to say Ratio didn’t care about him.

“But, if things go well,” Ratio added afterwards. “Then, there’ll be nothing to worry about.”

The gloved fingers underneath his hand twitched, and Ratio observed the way Aventurine’s expression twisted in something that looked like Aventurine was trying to read him, or figure out the genuineness or meaning in his words. Aventurine mouthed his words again, and Ratio only nodded his head in silent confirmation.

After a thoughtful pause, Aventurine’s gaze owlishly dragged down — the motion of it reminding Ratio their mutual current states of being devoid of sleep — to their hands that remained on each other.

Finally, Aventurine sighed.

“Fine. I’ll consider your requests. But only if you let me take the Curio.”

Ratio squinted in surprise before he nodded, removing his hand away for Aventurine to pull away from the small black box and reach for the Curio’s glass vial.

“I’m guessing that you weren’t satisfied with how the effects suddenly ended,” Aventurine remarked, swishing the contents around.

Ratio wouldn’t deny that he was questioning what exactly happened for the Curio to suddenly end abruptly like it did during their previous test session. After all, the last thing he heard before their connection broke was similar to something that sounded like an old TV turning itself off.

And while he wanted to know what happened, there was also a part of him that felt like there was still… more to this.

(That it was still too soon for this to be over between them.)

“… I can’t blame you, though, Doctor. I was also curious about what happened, too,” Aventurine murmured. “It’d be a shame if there were other things that weren’t discovered with the Curio’s effect. But then there’s the next question: Why me again? What about all the other volunteers?”

Ratio furrowed his brows, trying to consider his words as Aventurine hummed and exchanged him an inquisitive expression.

(‘We’re already working together.
It’s already convenient this way.
You already understand how things work,
so I don’t need to explain anything.’

Because
it had to be him.)

“A gamble doesn’t need an audience. Just needs at least two players, a winner, and a loser,” Ratio stated. “I don’t think you’re satisfied with the results either. Correct?”

For once, after days, Aventurine laughed.

Not one of indignance, but something that held a sense of ease, as if there was a weight that was lifted from his shoulders. Thankfully, that was something Ratio could hope to come out of this conversation that was supposed to last seven minutes.

“Yeah?” Aventurine grinned at him. “You think you have a good read on me to assume that, Ratio?”

Ratio narrowed his eyes and scoffed.

“Hardly.”

Whether or not it was a good thing, Aventurine’s lips spread further into a knowing one — similar to the ones where Aventurine had already peered into his head and picked out his secrets — before Aventurine hung the vial in the air between them.

“Y’know what? I changed my mind.”

Now —

“What?”

“I think I need a little more convincing if you want me to be your partner again, for both Project [XXX] and the Curio,” Aventurine said slyly, leaning in close enough to provocatively shake the vial in front of Ratio’s face. “I’ll only give you until next afternoon since that’s how long I’ll postpone the meeting with Jade.”

Ratio flickered a firm gaze down at the glows of Aventurine’s eyes before he moved his hand to grasp onto Aventurine’s wrist in a gentle hold.

“I don’t need an afternoon,” Ratio said. “Give me your night. Tonight. A dinner.”

“Hm. Where at?”

“My home. I’ll cook.”

“Not offering up a restaurant? Should I be disappointed?”

“If that’s what you want, then we can go. But, from what I’ve seen, you’ve enjoyed the meals at home more than when we’ve gone out.”

Ratio figured the statement was true when the smile tensed up in a way that suggested Aventurine didn’t want to admit it. And Aventurine could deny it if he wanted to, but the red color that barely tinted his face would still give him away.

“I’ll consider it depending on what’s on the menu.”

“Whatever you want. I’ll make it for you.”

“And if my demands are expensive?”

“Doesn’t matter,” Ratio murmured, brushing his thumb along Aventurine’s wrist. “The main thing I have to do is convince you to be my partner again. Right?”

Ratio didn’t know what Aventurine might be thinking about
when Aventurine didn’t say anything except smile as he usually did,
despite the way he could feel Aventurine’s wrist grow warmer within his hold.

What was going through Aventurine’s head?

And for a moment, Ratio remembered the distorted static.