Chapter Text
Another day, another painfully average morning at High school. Cody opened his locker, grabbed his books, a few notebooks he definitely wasn’t going to use, and stuffed them into his backpack like he was packing for a five-minute vacation.
“Okay,” he muttered. “Math class… biology… and then I get to leave this educational prison.”
Meet Cody Anderson: 14 years old, tech nerd, professional girl-repellent, and—unfortunately for him—about to unlock a very weird superpower.
And also about to lose a fight with gravity.
Cody headed for the stairs, totally unaware he had just walked past a 90’s cheerleader ghost covered in shoe prints and a janitor ghost with half a mop handle sticking out of his skull.
These were Jessica Rulipa and Robert Terrynson.
Yes, they were dead.
No, they were not special.
This school had more ghosts than functioning Wi-Fi.
Jessica died in the 90s during the legendary Gas-Leak-Fire-Stampede Incident, which the school board still pretends “wasn’t anyone’s fault.”
Robert got pushed down the basement stairs in the 80s by some jerk. It was the 80s; health and safety were optional.
“I bet five shoulder massages he tries flirting with his teacher again,” Robert said.
“Don’t be dumb,” Jessica shot back. “That’s the safest bet on Earth. Ten bucks he tries the class president instead.”
“Deal.”
Even in death, they still made terrible choices.
Near the top of the stairs, Cody spotted his natural enemy:
A pretty girl.
He immediately activated “Codemeister Mode,” strutting forward with confidence that didn’t actually exist in his DNA.
And he walked straight through a ghost.
“AAAAHAHAH WHY DO YOU PEOPLE DO THIS?!” shrieked Lucius Canderlif, a ghostly 1700s teacher who had died of a heart attack caused by stress, bad diet, and drinking during class like it was the Olympics.
Walking through Lucius had one side effect: instant, involuntary drunkenness.
Which hit Cody like a truck.
“Heeeeey, Charlie,” Cody slurred, stumbling toward the girl. “You hic look amazing today… Since when do you have… two faces? hic”
Charlie stared. “Uh… are you dying?”
“Dyin’? Nah. Cody don’t die. Cody—AHHHHH!”
He fell down the staircase like a sack of malfunctioning potatoes.
“Oh my GOD!” Charlie screamed. “Someone call the nurse! The weird kid just ate the floor!”
Lucius peeked over the railing.
“I was never here,” he whispered, and vanished through a wall.
Students gathered around Cody, poking him, shouting his name, shaking him like an unlabeled soda bottle.
Nothing helped.
The last thing he saw was a cheerleader and a janitor staring down at him.
Great. Even in unconsciousness he couldn’t impress girls.
Cody woke to a bright white ceiling.
“Ugh… my head…”
It felt like someone had installed a jackhammer behind his eyeballs.
“What happened?”
“Lucky,” someone muttered.
Cody turned and saw a guy in biker clothes sitting beside him—looking extremely annoyed for someone who was see-through.
“Guy takes one tumble and wakes up with a headache,” the biker complained. “Meanwhile I slip on ONE wet floor and look at me now.”
Who is this dude? Why does he look like the dollar-store villain from a vampire motorcycle movie?
The nurse’s office door opened.
“Ah, you’re awake,” said the school doctor. “Good. Now, would you like to explain why you were drinking alcohol during class hours?”
“WHAT?!”
The biker ghost cackled. “You’re toast, tiny.”
The doctor crossed his arms.
“You showed mild symptoms of drunkenness. Therefore, you must have been drinking.”
Cody looked like someone just leaked his search history.
“Sir, I swear on my grandma’s old cat I’ve never touched alcohol!”
“Your chart suggests otherwise.”
The biker ghost snorted. “HAHAHAHA—busted!”
That did it.
“CAN YOU SHUT UP?!” Cody yelled.
The doctor blinked. “Excuse me?”
“Not you! Him! The annoying biker dude from the 80s!”
The biker froze. “Wait, what?”
The doctor looked in the direction Cody was pointing.
“…Kid, there’s no one there.”
Cody stared. “Huh?!”
The biker’s face lit up like a Christmas trhee.
“He can see us!” He shot through the wall. “I gotta tell the others!”
Cody’s blood pressure spiked so hard it could’ve shattered glass.
“What.”
“Kid,” the doctor said slowly, “are you still drunk?”
Before Cody could answer, the biker ghost burst back in—dragging Jessica and Julius with him.
Jessica raised an eyebrow. “Wow. He really can see us.”
“Incredible,” Julius said, fascinated like Cody was a science fair project.
“What the heck is THIS?!” Cody screamed, scrambling backward like a terrified crab on caffeine.
“What is all that yelling?!” Robert floated through the wall, looking cranky. “Some of us are trying to nap.”
He blinked at Cody.
“What’s up with the noodle kid?”
Cody screamed so loud it echoed through the entire school