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“What would you do if I abstracted tomorrow?”
The room seemed to tilt, the air tightening as though the walls themselves recoiled from the question. Silence settled heavy between them, suffocating. Jax didn’t answer right away. His emotions were unreadable, his hands loose at his sides as though nothing had changed. Finally, he turned, expression blank, voice flat.
“I’d move on.” A pause. His eyes flicked to hers, cold. “And probably forget about you.”
Pomni froze. The words lodged themselves in her chest like a blade. “Okay,” she whispered. She swallowed. “Okay. I understand.” She turned away, not daring to look at him. Could he really mean that? After everything? After the laughter, the chaos, the adventures they’d survived together? Her thoughts blurred, collapsing in on themselves until all that remained was the unbearable ache.
Her fingers tightened around the gun. Slowly, she lifted it, the weight steady in her trembling hand. Behind her, Jax let out a dry chuckle, the sound scraping. “Jeez, you really can’t take a joke, ca–”
Bang. Jax’s words died in his throat. His eyes widened, shock overtaking his usual grin. Pomni’s knees buckled, the gun slipping from her hands as her body fell to the ground. And just like that, she was gone, assuming she went where everyone else went. The gun clattered against the ground, echoing too loud in the hollow room. A faint shimmer lingered where she’d been, then faded, leaving nothing. Jax stood frozen. His chest rose and fell in shallow, uneven breaths. The silence pressed in, heavier than before.
“…Shi[bleep].” His voice cracked in the emptiness.
—
Everyone was heading toward the auditorium for The Favorite Character Awards. The buzz of conversation and bright decorations couldn’t cut through the heavy air between Pomni and Jax. They hadn’t spoken since their last argument, and the silence between them felt louder than the crowd itself. Every time Pomni caught sight of him in her peripheral vision, her chest tightened. Before they reached their seats, Pomni accidentally bumped into Ragatha.
“Hey, I–I feel like, uh—”
“I–I have something I—” Pomni blurted at the same time.
They both froze, tripping over each other’s words, then burst into a small, nervous laugh.
“You can speak first,” Ragatha said gently.
“No, you go.”
The awkwardness softened for a fleeting second, the tension in Pomni’s shoulders loosening. They both grinned faintly, as if trying to promise each other: later. “Maybe we can talk after the show,” Pomni murmured. Ragatha nodded, then steered them both toward their seats.
When Jax entered, his eyes scanned the row. They were all there. Pomni, Ragatha, Zooble slouching half-drunk, Kinger muttering under his breath. For a moment, he hovered at the edge of the aisle, hands in his pockets, debating. He could sit with them. Pretend nothing happened. Pretend he wasn’t still replaying every word of their last fight in his head. But the thought of being in the middle of them, of being near her, was too much. So he slipped past and sat down with a group of NPCs who were laughing about nothing. Pomni noticed. Of course she noticed. Her eyes darted to the empty seat near her, then searched for him until she found him in the crowd. Her stomach twisted. She wanted to get up, walk over, say something but the lights dimmed, and Caine’s voice boomed across the stage.
“Helloooo, everyone! Welcome to the Favorite Character Awards!” The room erupted in cheers. Pomni forced herself to look forward, clapping along, though her thoughts kept drifting sideways toward Jax.
Jax, meanwhile, barely heard Caine’s theatrics. His chest felt tight, each cheer like a needle in his skull. He told himself it didn’t matter. He didn’t care. He never cared. So why did his throat ache? His eyes burned. He blinked hard, but the tears threatened anyway. His leg bounced uncontrollably, faster and faster. He couldn’t take it anymore. Without thinking, Jax shoved himself up and slipped out of the row, moving as quickly and quietly as he could. No one could see him like this. No one. He made it to the bathroom, slammed the door shut, and twisted the faucet on full blast. The sound of rushing water filled the room, but it didn’t drown out the ragged wheeze of his breathing. His chest heaved as though the walls were pressing in, his heart pounding so violently he thought it might rip free. His ears rang, vision swimming, and for a second he thought he might collapse. He gripped the sink until his knuckles began to hurt, staring down at his reflection in the mirror.
“God,” he muttered, voice shaking. “You really look stupid.”
The toilet flushed. Jax flinched, snapping his head up just as a stall door creaked open. Disappearing Guy stepped out, scratching his head like he’d just woken from a nap. He gave Jax a puzzled look, opened his mouth as if to say something.
“So—” was all that came out before he vanished mid-syllable.
Jax was alone again. Alone with the sound of the faucet, his own shallow gasps, and the weight of everything unsaid. Back in the auditorium, Caine was announcing the winner of the next category. “And the award goes to… Zooble!” The crowd erupted, though Zooble, drenched in stupid sauce, could barely lift their head to acknowledge it. The audience laughed, Caine carried on, and the show continued its rhythm. Pomni, though, wasn’t paying attention. She turned toward where Jax had been sitting, only to see the empty chair. Her heart lurched.
“Ragatha,” she whispered urgently. “I need to go to the bathroom.”
Ragatha blinked. “Now? The show just—”
“I’ll be quick.” Pomni forced a smile, though her eyes betrayed her unease. Before Ragatha could press further, she slipped from her seat and made her way to the exit, pulse quickening with every step.
The bathroom door creaked open, and Pomni stepped inside. The harsh fluorescent lights flickered, buzzing faintly above her head. At the sink, Jax hunched over, hands braced against the porcelain, water running full blast as if the sound alone could drown out everything else.
“Jax…?” Pomni’s voice was tentative, quiet.
He stiffened, shoulders going rigid, but he didn’t turn to look at her. “Go away.” Pomni swallowed. She walked further in, the soft squeak of her shoes on the tile making him flinch. “I said go away!” Jax’s voice cracked, harsher this time, bouncing off the walls. “Why can’t you just listen for once?” Pomni froze a few steps behind him. He still wasn’t looking at her, but his reflection in the foggy mirror betrayed him, eyes red, face twisted with something she had never seen before.
“Jax…” she whispered, softer now.
“Don’t.” He let out a hollow laugh, his head bowing lower. “Don’t do that. Don’t sound like you actually… care.” His voice faltered. “Because you’ll just—” He broke off, breathing ragged, one hand clutching the edge of the sink as if holding himself up. Pomni’s chest tightened. “What do you mean?” Finally, he turned, and his gaze caught hers, raw and unguarded. His lip trembled before he bit it, trying to mask it.
“Ribbit.” His voice was barely above a whisper. “You never met him. He abstracted before Kuafmo. And you know what I did?” His throat bobbed as he swallowed hard. “I laughed. I made a joke. Pretended it didn’t matter.”
“But it did matter,” Jax pressed on, words tumbling out like they’d been locked away too long. “It mattered so much that I thought I was gonna break. And I decided—” He shook his head, a bitter smile twitching across his lips. “I decided I’d never care about anyone again. Because if I did, if I actually let myself…” His voice trailed off, shaking. “I’d lose them. And it would kill me.”
The faucet hissed, the only sound filling the silence that followed. Jax looked down again, shoulders trembling, as though the confession had drained what little strength he had left. Pomni’s chest tightened as Jax’s words sank in. She wanted to say something, anything but the lump in her throat made it impossible. Instead, her body moved before her mind could catch up.
Step by step, she closed the space between them. Her hands trembled, but she reached out anyway, wrapping her arms around him. The fabric of his overalls was stiff under her touch, and for a heartbeat, she braced herself for him to shove her away, to laugh, to mock her for even trying.
But he didn’t.
Jax froze, his body going rigid. The faucet still hissed in the background. Then, slowly, shakily, his shoulders slumped, and he let out a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. The warmth of her against him chipped away at the last of his defenses. His arms lifted, hesitant at first then pulled her in, holding her like if he let go she might vanish too.
“Please…” His voice cracked, muffled against her shoulder. “Please don’t ever abstract.”
Pomni’s breath caught, tears stinging her eyes. “I won’t,” she whispered, clutching him tighter. “I promise.” For a moment, they just stayed like that, clinging to each other in the empty bathroom, the weight of unspoken feelings hanging heavy in the air. Then Jax pulled back slightly, enough to look at her. His eyes were still glassy, but a crooked smirk tugged weakly at his lips.
“…If you ever tell anyone about this,” he muttered, voice rough but teasing, “I’ll kill you.”
Pomni blinked at him, then let out a shaky laugh despite herself. “Yeah, okay. Your secret’s safe.” The corner of Jax’s mouth twitched upward, not quite his usual grin, but closer. The tension in the room loosened just a little. For the first time in what felt like forever, neither of them felt so alone.