Work Text:
Cheng Xiaoshi practices his speech in front of the mirror:
“Lu Guang is the worst roommate ever—”
Okay, no, scratch that. No one will believe that and especially not Qiao Ling.
Lu Guang may seem cold and aloof but Cheng Xiaoshi knows just how kind a soul he is inside. It's almost been a year since he moved into the Time Photo Studio with him and Cheng Xiaoshi would be lying if he said that Lu Guang's presence didn't drastically improve every aspect of his life. Instead of living on his own and badgering Qiao Ling into having occasional sleepovers with him, now he could finally share a living space with another person.
Now he could sing loudly in the shower and wait to be scolded for the ruckus he was making by the sleeping beauty still lying curled upon the top bunk in their room, always a little grumpy in the mornings. He could cook for two instead of one and take great pleasure in knowing that Lu Guang liked the food he made and he could even nudge him into having more helpings because Lu Guang was just way too bony. He could share chores around the house, darkroom tasks from their photography clients, and virtually anything that was on his mind with his roommate.
Lu Guang fit perfectly here as if he was always meant to be together with him, a puzzle piece slotting into its rightful position. Lu Guang was his first—
Wait, what is this?
Ahem, he's gotten carried away. This is not what he's complaining about. Ugh, it's all Lu Guang’s fault!
Coming back to the point: "Lu Guang is a stubborn old man, Qiao Ling! You don't know what I have to deal with. All day, every day, he eats sweet snacks and I don't scold him for it. But the cold drinks? Milk tea every other day? He's practically tempting fate! There's no use explaining the yin-yang imbalance from eating too many cold foods to him. Neither does he listen to the scientific articles I send him. Sure, it's summer and the weather is hot and uncomfortably sticky, and we could really do with air conditioning right about now, if only the heavens above sent us a generous donation, hah, but he needs to listen to me on this! If it goes on any longer, mark my words, he's going to catch such a terrible cold...”
The hot weather excuse doesn't work on Cheng Xiaoshi for one simple reason.
This is Lu Guang they are talking about. He doesn't even own a single pair of shorts. Apparently, while moving in, he'd lost the box containing all his summer clothes but he'd made no move to replace them and continued wearing full-sleeved shirts and even his lighter crewnecks. At night, Cheng Xiaoshi would often start suffocating like a fish out of water if the fan wasn't at full mast but Lu Guang wasn't particular about it. It didn't seem like the temperature bothered him at all.
It was only when it came to his incorrigible sweet tooth that Lu Guang seemed to feel this supposed heat and cared not about freezing his gums off or catching a cold or any of the things that Cheng Xiaoshi constantly lectured him about.
“Qiao Ling? Hello? Why aren't you saying anything?”
The Qiao Ling on his phone screen blinks at him twice then scowls.
“And here I thought you had a real emergency! Do you know how many deadlines I have this week, Cheng Xiaoshi?” She whisper-yells. Ah, she must be in the library. Well, it can't be helped.
“This is important too! Don't you care about our poor Lu Guang's health? I expected better from you...” Cheng Xiaoshi tuts, but lowers his voice as well.
“Of course I care!” Qiao Ling declares, immediately wincing at her own volume. Whispering an apology to the table, she briskly walks out the room with phone in hand and Cheng Xiaoshi can see her shooting daggers at him even from the totally unflattering under-the-chin angle.
Once outside, she says: “What's this about Lu Guang? He's younger than you but much more mature so how come he's acting the way you say he is? Usually, I just rely on him to make sure that you're alive at all… Are you sure you're not just slandering him because he confiscated your game again?”
Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't bother refuting her. This much is true. This is also the first time that he's found himself nagging at Lu Guang, usually it's always the other way around, with Lu Guang calling him an idiot in that particular exasperated tone of his, making Cheng Xiaoshi's heart race and making him want to do even more stupid things just to hear it again.
What the hell, he's off track once more!!
“Qiao Ling,” he says in a serious voice. “Your favoritism is astounding but that's for you and I to discuss later. Lu Guang is on the cusp of unleashing absolute disaster upon himself and we need to stop him. You need to help me talk to him because whatever I say goes out his other ear. He doesn't listen to me at all!”
“Why do I have to deal with your domestic troubles too...” Qiao Ling grumbles. “But fine. I'll come over tomorrow before my morning lecture.”
“Thank you, my ever so gracious landlady, I knew I could always count on you.”
“Scram now and don’t you dare disturb me again.”
Cheng Xiaoshi is in a good mood after his video call with Qiao Ling and decides to lounge on the sofa and wait for his elusive roommate to get back home.
Lu Guang has been out since early afternoon to deliver a few bundles of photographs all around town and although he'd mentioned that he'd just have dinner outside, it's getting late now. He's already closed up the shop for the day. Just when Cheng Xiaoshi wonders if he should text Lu Guang, the sound of the key turning in the lock greets his ears, followed by the chiming of the bell.
“Welcome back, Lu Guanggggg…” Cheng Xiaoshi draws out the second syllable.
“Hm.” Lu Guang is busy changing into his slippers and keeping the keys in their original spot so Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't notice anything amiss until he walks into the room. Immediately Cheng Xiaoshi’s spine goes rigid and he sits up straight on the couch.
This man is truly impossible. Didn't he already have his fill at noon when he made himself a glass of cold coffee so he could “have the energy to go deliver photographs?” Does he really have a sugar dependency?
“Lu Guang, what's that in your hand?”
"Iced milk tea. I got you one too," he says sagely, holding up the bag in his hand. Indeed, next to Lu Guang's trademark brown sugar boba with the max sweetness is his own favorite taro bubble tea. He’s touched for a second before quickly willing the sentiment away.
No, no, no, Cheng Xiaoshi is really putting down his foot this time!
"Lu Guang, come here," he beckons in a stern voice.
Lu Guang looks up at him. "Why?"
"Just do as I say for once!" Cheng Xiaoshi barks out as he stands up, trying to make himself sound as commandeering as possible.
Lu Guang shoots him an unimpressed look but obliges, walking right up to him, which... makes him happier than it should.
Focus!!!
Cheng Xiaoshi swiftly snatches the bag away from Lu Guang and holds it up out of his reach. It's freezing cold to the touch.
"Of course, Master Lu couldn't even ask for no ice for my sake, even though I've told you to a million times now. It hurts way too much, I tell you!”
Lu Guang simply levels a deadpan stare at him, then reaches his hand up to try and wrestle the bag out of his grip.
As if Cheng Xiaoshi would let that happen. This sly fox may be able to outsmart him with his little tricks but his physical ability is far superior than Lu Guang’s, this much is for sure. Lu Guang must know it as well which is why a look of frustration soon blooms on his face. Cheng Xiaoshi cherishes it wholeheartedly, committing the sight to memory.
"Give it to me."
"Absolutely not."
“I waited in line for one hour to get them.”
“Then, you can wait some more! You’re not drinking this today, I’m confiscating it,” he declares. Is this what Lu Guang feels like when he does the same with him? Wow, lecturing someone is really not without its appeal!
"Cheng Xiaoshi, stop being difficult."
"Oh? Look at you acting all aggrieved like I'm bullying you."
"I got one for you too. Don't be unreasonable."
“Do you think you can always get your way if you bribe me with boba, eh, Xiao Guangguang?”
“I can't?” Lu Guang asks, tilting his head with a guileless look on his face, lips the slightest bit upturned so it seems like he's pouting. He's not. Probably.
Cheng Xiaoshi falters. He badly wants to just kiss that little frown off his friend's face but he must persevere. This is far more important!
“That's not the point! You're going to catch a cold if it goes on like this, Lu Guang. You make yourself some tooth-achingly sweet drink every evening and when we go to the convenience store, you buy every single brand of coffee! You promised me that you'll cut down on your caffeine and sugar intake but I don't see you stopping at all. I understand once or twice a week but you buy some or the other sweet beverage every single day!” Cheng Xiaoshi heaves a breath from how fast he's been talking, immediately launching into another tirade.
“This is not even to mention your addiction to sweet snacks. I think you consume more desserts in a week than Qiao Ling and I ever did growing up! What if you get cavities at your big age? Do you know how painful it is? I was just looking up root canal surgery online before you came back. It sounds like hell. You can't say this is unreasonable of me when I'm just worried about your pearly white teeth, baobei," he mutters all in one breath, barely even realizing what he's just said.
Well, the ball has been dropped.
There is a heavy pause.
Lu Guang coughs slightly and then turns away entirely.
Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't know where he finds the courage to keep looking at Lu Guang after letting that slip but he notices that the sides of Lu Guang's cheeks have gone slightly pink. It must be because of the cold that he must've already caught. Right. Because he drinks too many iced teas and coffees and whatever ridiculously sweet treat he can lay his hands on. Of course, that must be it.
Hah…
Truth be told, this is not the first time Cheng Xiaoshi has called him… that.
Of course, Cheng Xiaoshi knows Lu Guang's opinion on such cheesy endearments. Back when he was pretending to be Zhou Xun and trying to flirt with Vivian, he'd used the same term, albeit the delivery was way too sleazy to convince any girl, let alone someone like Lu Guang. He'd freely expressed his distaste at the time.
However, there had been a time months later when Cheng Xiaoshi had fallen asleep quite late after playing a game on his phone all night and Lu Guang tried to wake him up so that he wouldn't miss his morning lecture. He distinctly remembers saying something to the effect of "Five more minutes, baobei, you get ready first, I'll be down in a whiiiiiiiiile." He remembers slurring through his words and barely making any sense at all but the odd thing had been that Lu Guang had gone deathly quiet at the time.
Also, you cannot blame him for tacking that on, Cheng Xiaoshi claims no responsibility for anything said under the influence of sleep! Well, not completely under its influence. Cheng Xiaoshi is not some loser jerk who would pretend to like someone only to run away, okay? He can own up to his own feelings, his feelings that make him do inexplicable things like call his pretty roommate Baobei.
Yeah, well. The cat is already out of the bag. He's colossally fucked but at least he's made his peace with it. Somewhat. Lu Guang is way too uninterested in these matters. He’s never brought up romance at all in all his time here. Cheng Xiaoshi has no chance. He doesn't even know what he would do if he had a chance. Lu Guang is his first real friend. Cheng Xiaoshi has watched his fair share of romance dramas to know that everything gets complicated and messy once you get tangled in the web of feelings.
What if Lu Guang hated his... well, feelings for him and moved out? What would Cheng Xiaoshi do then? How would he cope with having no company again? How would he even manage to live one day in this house without Lu Guang? No, no, thinking about such matters was futile.
And yet.
For the past five minutes, they've both just been standing silently in their respective positions, rooted to the spot as if their bodies suddenly turned into stone. Cheng Xiaoshi’s arm is still hanging in the air and it's begun to ache. He slowly lowers it, making the drinks slosh with the motion.
Lu Guang is definitely blushing. It's unmistakable. He looks a sight, the contrast of his pale white hair making the complexion of his flushed red face look even more striking.
“I’m going to sleep,” he says calmly, shuffling his feet.
He doesn't ask for his drink back as he goes up the stairs.
Cheng Xiaoshi would have liked to look at him some more but a small smile tugs at his lips as the rusty gears turn in his brain.
So, something works after all huh?
As promised, Qiao Ling comes over early the next morning, heading over straight to the kitchen where she spots Lu Guang reaching into the fridge for something.
Thankfully Cheng Xiaoshi makes his way down the stairs right at that moment too and spots her, sprinting into the kitchen and quickly snatching the carton of cold milk from Lu Guang's hand.
Lu Guang: ?
Qiao Ling: ???
Qiao Ling narrows her eyes at him as he covers Lu Guang with his body. "What are you doing," she mouths.
Cheng Xiaoshi winces as Lu Guang struggles to get free and grabs for the milk again. He blocks him behind his back and restrains his hand at the same time. The tussle goes on for a while, until finally surrendering to his fate, Lu Guang just sort of settles there next to his shoulder.
“Good morning, Qiao Ling-jie,” he mutters in a resigned tone.
“Morning, Lu Guang. I heard from Cheng Xiaoshi—” You choose now to be loyal, Qiao Ling! He wants to tell her that there's no need for her services anymore; he has found a much better method to coax Lu Guang. One that he wants to try and test some more.
“You heard nothing!” He declares grandly, trying to signal her to shut up by making his brows wiggle into an intricate dance.
Qiao Ling stares at him, eye twitching slightly.
“What about the milk?”
“He was getting it for me! Lu Guang is going to make me a steaming hot cup of tea today. Qiao Ling, you know nothing about the matters between us two bosom friends. You just wouldn’t get it!”
“It’s thirty-four degrees.” Qiao Ling shoots him a disgusted look, then directs her gaze to Lu Guang.
“Lu Guang, is this true?”
Cheng Xiaoshi elbows him gently behind his back, “It is! It is, right, Guangguang?
“Guangguang… Don't tell me you really call him that now?”
If only she knew this was the tip of the iceberg.
Lu Guang looks confused but says yes to Qiao Ling anyway. Cheng Xiaoshi wants to do nothing but envelop him in a tight hug and sweep him off his feet but he manages to rein himself in.
Qiao Ling mumbles something about Cheng Xiaoshi being a fucking weirdo and that she knew he was just trying to frame Lu Guang.
Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't bother to correct her. The crisis has been averted.
As Qiao Ling settles down on the living room couch, Cheng Xiaoshi decides it'd be nice to make breakfast for all of them.
Lu Guang is still in the kitchen, looking a little unsure about what just happened. He's eyeing a pouch of sweet condensed milk and some Milo powder (which he always prefers cold), and Cheng Xiaoshi knows he has to do something again.
Sidling closer to him, he puts an arm around Lu Guang.
“Thank you for the save, baobei. I owe you one. Should I make you sweet congee today?”
Lu Guang is immediately dazed, but Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't miss the pink warmth rising on his face. His theory seems sound so far. Lu Guang stops reaching for the milk and nods his yes to Cheng Xiaoshi's offer.
Again.
It's because Lu Guang loves sweet congee; he'd trade you for a single bowl of sweet congee, a part of his brain tries to rationalize. Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't feel like listening to it.
Next time, Lu Guang is prepared.
Of course he is. Cheng Xiaoshi knows his patterns of thinking. Once or twice in his sleep could be a fluke. But what's been happening this past week? There is simply no way.
Any time Lu Guang would try to order or make some cold beverage, Cheng Xiaoshi would instantly appear out of the blue like some apparition haunting him. Even popsicles and ice-cream aren't safe, because Cheng Xiaoshi knows all too well Lu Guang’s penchant for overindulgence in a sweet treat that he likes.
Cheng Xiaoshi would come real close and either croon at him sweetly while looking right into his eyes or wrap a hand around his waist and snatch the offending drink away from his hands. Both methods had a 100% success rate so far.
“Lu Guang, this cute white stubborn kitty keeps trying his best to catch a cold. What should I do with him, huh?
“Xiao Guangguang, you’re still testing my patience? No, I’m not letting you go until you let go.”
“Baobei, that's bad for your health. C'mon, put it back on the shelf.”
After some practice, the words practically roll off his tongue so smoothly that he doesn't even break eye contact while saying them. He's getting so good at it that for the past week, it's only him who has been gently lecturing Lu Guang, not the other way around. Although he does miss Lu Guang scolding him in that particular tone of his and calling him a shagua, he thinks getting to see him blush so prettily is a satisfactory exchange.
Lu Guang's reaction is the same every time. He freezes and reddens, then tries to pass it off as nothing by modulating his voice back to its usual calm. He doesn’t try to argue or reason with Cheng Xiaoshi. No witty remarks, none of his usual no-nonsense attitude. He simply acquiesces to whatever Cheng Xiaoshi asks of him. Cheng Xiaoshi is beginning to get somewhat addicted to saying these shameless words, even though he knows it's only so long before Lu Guang will stop falling for them.
The stick that finally breaks the camel’s back arrives in the form of a misplaced back hug. Cheng Xiaoshi swears that he was only trying to wrap an arm around Lu Guang’s back in order to reach those guilty hands wrapped around his favorite peach iced tea, but then one thing leads to another and they've ended up in the kitchen with both his hands wrapped around Lu Guang’s back, face buried in his neck.
Vaguely, he knows this is crossing a line but Cheng Xiaoshi is too immersed in the sensation of holding Lu Guang to think too deeply about anything.
The window is shut, so there is barely any ventilation in the room. He can smell his own sweat and worries that Lu Guang would find it gross, though not to the extent that he plans to shift away from him anytime soon. For a while, nothing can be heard except the sound of their quiet breathing and his own blood roaring in his ears.
Then, a sharp inhale.
“Cheng Xiaoshi…” Lu Guang starts, disentangling himself from his embrace. “Just, just what are you up to?” His voice has a ragged quality to it, like it does when he has a sore throat.
“I'm not up to anything,” Cheng Xiaoshi answers him solemnly. He doesn’t know where to place his hands, so he just lets them drop down limply to his sides.
“Why are you doing this?” Lu Guang asks, sounding a bit frazzled. What he means by this is obvious enough, but he does not put it into words.
For the first time, Cheng Xiaoshi realizes just how scary the precipice he’s standing on truly is.
“Aren't I just stopping you from getting sick?” He says, faking a smile and playing brave like usual.
“Is that it?” Lu Guang asks, finally looking up at him. The expression on his face is undecipherable.
“Yeah? Do you question my goodwill that much, baobei?” He regrets the words as soon as they leave his lips.
Lu Guang turns away without a word and stalks off towards the direction of the stairs.
Cheng Xiaoshi cannot blame him for it.
Lu Guang is trying to keep him at arm's length.
In the mornings, Lu Guang is usually slow and unhurried, sticky from sleep, but these days, he rushes off to the bathroom as soon as he wakes up and then straight downstairs. He’s not ignoring him outright, but he’s not giving him any chances to speak to him alone. The worst part is that he even stops buying those stupid drinks.
Wow, congratulations are in order; his plan proved to be a success, after all. Lu Guang won’t catch a cold now.
Cheng Xiaoshi feels as if a fishbone is stuck in his throat. He’s really gone and done it now, huh? What if he makes Lu Guang move out, give up on him, run out without a word like his parents did—
No.
He regards the thought with such vehemence that it scares him.
He can’t get used to a life without Lu Guang and even more so a Lu Guang who barely looks at him all day... he’ll apologize, he decides. He’ll say it was all a joke and everything will go back to normal again.
It totally doesn't help that Lu Guang is so popular with the university’s cosplay club. They're always fawning over him and buying him food and drinks at the cafeteria and Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't understand why.
Although Lu Guang offers to help them from time to time, is it really necessary to spoil him with so many snacks?
Some of them even order it straight to their studio, no shame at all!
Today, Lu Guang is invited to a club meeting where he's been handed over another beautiful historical costume, this time in pure snow white, accentuating all his natural features. Cheng Xiaoshi is not the assigned photographer this time, but he knows this because he might’ve been skipping his class to go and check up on Lu Guang. If someone can see him stuck outside the club room window right now, snooping inside for the past half an hour, which they must be able to, they thankfully don’t call him out on it.
For the last couple of days, ironically enough, Lu Guang has been sniffling and dealing with a bout of runny nose, so Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't understand why the gaggle of girls and boys surrounding him still insists, thanking him and asking him to take his pick out of the chilled cans laid out on the table. A couple of them are even fanning him and complimenting his makeup. Can’t they see his sick complexion? Even though Lu Guang carries himself in a dignified manner outside and doesn’t like to cough or otherwise indicate his illness when he’s not wearing a face mask, Cheng Xiaoshi isn’t fooled. That isn’t cosplay rouge on him; it is definitely the markings of a real fever.
What’s more annoying is how Lu Guang doesn’t even decline the offer like he would at any other time. He looks too distracted and preoccupied with something to pay them much mind, selecting a random purple drink from the lot and clinking his can with the others’ before opening it and drinking it in large gulps.
Cheng Xiaoshi feels horrible. Lu Guang is already sick, and now he can’t even stop him from making it worse. What has he done?
A classmate of his who is standing next to Lu Guang then leans over. “Lu Guang, your drink looks interesting. Can I have a sip?” Before Lu Guang can say a word, the boy has already leaned into his space and slipped his hand over Lu Guang's to bring the can over to his face.
Cheng Xiaoshi suddenly sees red.
After stealing the sip, this stranger even has the gall to force his own disgusting spit-covered straw into Lu Guang’s face. “Taste mine too. I remember you like strawberry, right?” What the hell? How fucking greasy!
Before Cheng Xiaoshi can process what he’s doing, he’s already barged inside the room and put an arm around Lu Guang’s shoulder, firmly leading his upper body away from the straw and towards his own chest, no awkwardness in his motions as the muscle memory kicks in with practiced ease.
Ignoring the ugly look thrown his way by his classmate as well as the stunned silence that descends across the room, Cheng Xiaoshi schools his features into something more amiable.
“Meiren, are they bothering you?” He asks Lu Guang with a bright grin.
Lu Guang is looking at him like he’s grown two heads while the others quickly start to coo at them.
“Whoa, Cheng Xiaoshi, since when did you learn to be so smooth? No way, I almost thought Lu Guang’s real boyfriend walked into the scene.”
“I think I got goosebumps just now...”
“Is this a drama? Hahaha, what a spectacle! Did you guys plan this out beforehand?”
“Of course, we did. Now, I have to take this beauty to the doctor because he has an urgent appointment right now. I’ll come over to deliver his costume later.” Cheng Xiaoshi confidently makes up some cock and bull, slipping his hand into Lu Guang’s and dragging him out of the room in a hurry.
Immediately, he notices that Lu Guang’s hand is too warm. He was right about the fever.
Lu Guang is shocked enough that he allows himself to be led outside and walks beside him for a few steps before coming to a stop.
“Cheng Xiaoshi.”
“Let’s talk later. Walk with me till the infirmary wing first,” Cheng Xiaoshi says and tightens his hold on Lu Guang’s hand so he cannot slip away.
He’s made his choice. He’s going to tell him today.
He sits Lu Guang down on the bed and gathers lozenges and cold medicine for him once they reach the wing.
For good measure, he decides to drape the curtains around the bed shut.
“Cheng Xiaoshi–”
“I like you, Lu Guang.”
“I thought that I could try and get over it to be with you longer, but it’s no use. I really can’t control my feelings, as I’m sure you’ve already seen. I came over to find you today to apologize, but I don’t want to. I really can’t, Lu Guang. I know I’ve been overstepping boundaries and doing dumb things I shouldn't do under the guise of… well, boba tea, but I can’t help it. I keep thinking that you’ll leave me, but even that scary thought doesn’t hold up to the rest of my feelings for you. I really like you, that’s all. I just had to get this out… whatever you say now, I’ll listen to you.”
Cheng Xiaoshi’s eyes are shut tight throughout his confession. A confession, he realizes, with a shaky breath. He peeks open an eye slowly and is left feeling gobsmacked at the sight he sees.
The corners of Lu Guang’s eyes are a distressed red, and there is a glistening shine over his irises. It’s as close to crying as Cheng Xiaoshi has ever seen him. He’s wearing that same unreadable expression from a few nights ago.
It’s not confusion, not even anger, but more of... anguish? He tries not to let his heart constrict in his chest. Does Lu Guang really hate him that bad?
He has to admit that does sting.
“It’s okay if you don’t want to give me an answer right now,” he tries to chuckle, but it is unconvincing even to his own ears.
Lu Guang is quiet for so long that it kills any remaining hope he might’ve still been harbouring. Just when he’s considering finding an excuse to get the hell away from this room and possibly try to move out of the country too, Lu Guang finally speaks. He says only two words, but it’s what Cheng Xiaoshi has been longing to hear from him all this while.
“You idiot,” Lu Guang says fondly, and Cheng Xiaoshi’s heart melts all over again.
Unfortunately, Cheng Xiaoshi is not able to act on the multitude of feelings currently bursting through and out of him, because Lu Guang looks really sick and his health has always been Cheng Xiaoshi’s top priority. He simply tucks him into bed and kisses him on the forehead, barely a brush of lips. “Sweet dreams, Lu Guang. I’ll see you at home.”
His schedule for the rest of the day is considerably packed, and even though he wants nothing more than to rush back home and nurse Lu Guang back to health, Qiao Ling would really boil his head if he doesn’t finish his share of the work on time.
When he’s finally back home, Lu Guang is already asleep.
That’s just as well. He needs all the rest he can get. No matter that Cheng Xiaoshi has been dying to see him all day.
He's ready to let the matter go until he hears a muffled sneeze from the top bunk.
!!!
Lu Guang, you little shit…
“You’re awake, Xiao Guanggang. What is this, lying to me already?”
Cheng Xiaoshi stands up and peers into the top bunk. Lu Guang is undeniably awake, head turned the other way, shoulders shaking slightly.
Fuck. Is he crying?
“Lu Guang, are you alright?”
No response. The fan is switched off even though it’s a hot night, and Lu Guang must be sweating inside his blankets, not to mention Cheng Xiaoshi doesn't even know if his fever has broken yet. Lu Guang has never been someone to take care of himself properly when ill.
“Lu Guang, look at me please,” Cheng Xiaoshi says softly, reaching out his hand and gingerly placing it on a shaking shoulder.
Lu Guang finally lets a sniffle escape. The sound is so unfamiliar coming from the boy he knows that Cheng Xiaoshi freezes for a moment.
“It’s okay, Lu Guang. I don’t know what’s wrong, and you don’t need to tell me if you don’t want to. I just want to be here for you, okay?” He speaks gently, as if comforting a scared little animal.
After a minute, Lu Guang finally turns around. His pretty face is blotched red from crying, and tear tracks are running down his cheeks, but his breathing is better now, finally stable. He mutters something Cheng Xiaoshi can’t make out.
“What did you say?” Cheng Xiaoshi asks, slowly brushing the stray tears away from his face and checking his temperature. Still burning up.
“I’m sorry, Cheng Xiaoshi.” Lu Guang’s voice is impossibly hoarse and Cheng Xiaoshi’s heart aches. He should’ve been home to look after him.
His words give him pause, though.
“What for?” He asks, puzzled.
“I… I don’t know why I’m being like this either. But you don’t need to worry. I’ll never leave you.” Lu Guang’s voice is small, but the conviction behind his words is anything but. He says it so steadfastly that Cheng Xiaoshi cannot help but smile, something tight in his chest finally uncurling.
“I believe you. I’ll never let you go either. Now, come down. Sleep in my bed instead, baobei...” Cheng Xiaoshi coaxes. This time, the term of endearment does its job. Despite his fever, the blush is evident on Lu Guang’s face and ears. He averts his gaze but makes to get up obediently.
As he’s making his way down the short ladder, Cheng Xiaoshi suddenly grabs hold of him from behind and then maneuvers a hand below Lu Guang’s knees so that he can princess carry him instead.
“This is really not necessary,” Lu Guang grumbles, but hangs onto his shoulders anyway.
Cheng Xiaoshi laughs. “Who says it isn’t? I’m a gentleman, aren’t I? What’s with this look, be honest you like it!”
Cheng Xiaoshi deposits him on the bed gently and, given Lu Guang’s worrying temperature, thinks it’s better to get him a cold compress straight away. As soon as he turns away, though, a hand is already grabbing at his sleeve.
“Don't go,” Lu Guang mumbles.
Oh god. Cheng Xiaoshi tries not to collapse on the spot. His Lu Guang is so fucking cute.
“I’m just getting some stuff for your fever,” he tells him, but Lu Guang doesn’t relent.
“I’m fine. Really. Just don’t go, please.”
Well, Cheng Xiaoshi would really be a scoundrel if he ups and leaves now. He decides to simply hold Lu Guang for a while until he calms down and take it from there. As he settles inside the covers and moves to hug him, he realizes that Lu Guang is shivering. He presses his chest to his back and rubs a hand over his chest soothingly.
“Are you annoyed I’m acting this way?”
“Huh? Why would I be annoyed?”
“Because I don’t let you see this side of me. I’m always hiding things from you. Don’t you hate me?” Lu Guang’s voice sounds really tired.
Cheng Xiaoshi quietly moves his hand lower and slips his palm over the back of Lu Guang’s hand, interlocking their fingers.
“You know what I think? You’re just thinking too much. Hate you? Lu Guang, I could never,” he promises.
Lu Guang doesn’t answer.
“Come here, look at me,” Cheng Xiaoshi forces Lu Guang to turn to the opposite side with some difficulty and then lays him down on his chest.
“Indeed, I may not know a lot about you and as you said, you may be hiding things from me,” he begins. “I admit, I really don’t like that feeling, and you probably know why.” Lu Guang immediately tenses up in his arms and raises his head from where he’d buried it in the crook of his chest and shoulder. He looks so, so afraid and vulnerable.
“But so what? You’re here and you promised that you’ll never leave me. I already know you in every way that matters. The rest is secondary. I can prove it to you too,” Cheng Xiaoshi says, tilting his head down slightly, and pressing his lips to Lu Guang’s in a firm kiss. The angle is uncomfortable, and he has no technique to speak of, but Lu Guang’s lips are so warm and soft under his that all other thoughts soon fade away. It takes a bit of coaxing, but Lu Guang finally kisses back, making Cheng Xiaoshi smile.
This is the sweetest victory he’s ever won.
Wow. Cheng Xiaoshi didn’t know kissing felt this good. He sits up straight to kiss Lu Guang more properly, going back in for more and more. Lu Guang’s taste, his scent, his warmth, everything is dangerously addictive. Cheng Xiaoshi has no intent of stopping after getting everything he’s ever wanted right in front of him but a hand against his chest pushes him away abruptly.
“You’ll catch my cold,” Lu Guang says, cheeks aflame, chest heaving from how hard he’s breathing. Cheng Xiaoshi simply presses another kiss to his lips to tell him this line of arguing is moot until he’s shoved away again, this time with more force.
“Idiot,” Lu Guang whispers.
Cheng Xiaoshi smiles. “Okay, there will be more opportunities. I cannot bully a patient. This is why we need to get you better as soon as possible.”
Lu Guang shakes his head at him and settles back down on the bed.
“Oh, by the way, don’t think I’ve let you off the hook yet. Tell me, Xiao Guangguang, will you still drink those terrible drinks, especially when a stranger offers it to you?”
“No. I wasn’t about to drink it anyway. You made a scene for nothing.”
“For nothing? Hah, put yourself in my shoes for a second. Look at the cold and fever you’ve got right now! I’ll ask you again: will you still drink them?”
“No.”
“Good. Will you drink the soup I'll make for you tomorrow?”
“No.”
Cheng Xiaoshi: …
“Of course,” Lu Guang says, face finally breaking into a tiny smile.
Ah… way too pretty. Cheng Xiaoshi really worries for his own heart now. How is he to survive someone as cute and pretty and adorable as Lu Guang?
“Alright, you're forgiven,” Cheng Xiaoshi bundles Lu Guang up into his arms again and peppers his cheek with tiny kisses.
“And I don't know what you're so sad about but I swear I'll never actually be upset with you. Even if I am, you need to know that that's not me but the stupid dog inside of me talking, okay? I can never hate you, Guangguang. My precious baobei,” Cheng Xiaoshi promises him sincerely.
“Okay.” There’s something in Lu Guang’s voice that tells him he believes him.
The tension in Lu Guang’s body never quite drains out, but Cheng Xiaoshi will just have to convince him all over again until it does.
Cheng Xiaoshi wakes up with a prickly feeling in his throat. It's the best sleep he's had in forever. No nightmares, no thoughts of being alone. Lu Guang is sticky sweet and clinging to him still, chest rising and falling slowly next to him. He raises a hand to touch his forehead and notices that his fever has reduced slightly.
In a short while, Lu Guang will open his eyes and immediately reach out for him, missing his warmth beside him. Cheng Xiaoshi will hand him a glass of hot water and feed him warm porridge mouthful by mouthful. He will prop his half-awake figure against his chest and then force feed him cough syrup.
Lu Guang will complain about the taste, prompting Cheng Xiaoshi to kiss him in order to drive all the bitterness away. Lu Guang will blush, then try to feign composure. He’ll make Cheng Xiaoshi swear to bring him his favorite boba tea as soon as he gets better. Cheng Xiaoshi, now made an impossibly weak man, will easily give in.
For now, though, he is content to hold his sweet treasure in his arms for a while longer.