Chapter Text
Jim wakes up to the sound of David crying, and for a moment he forgets that the last week happened. He blinks his eyes open expecting to see the red ceiling of his room in Sarek’s house, and instead he sees the cool tones of his bedroom on Earth. Blinking, he sees Spock already getting out of bed to see what the baby needs, and his heart is full to bursting.
Right. They made it home. They saved the day, and Spock has come back to himself, at least enough to be a husband and a father again. They’ve spent the last several nights together in their own bed, making up for lost time with each other’s bodies and minds; it’s felt like a second honeymoon, a little time out of time.
No matter what happens, Jim has appreciated getting to have this time. He doesn’t know what force of order decided to give him his husband and son back from the dead, but he never wants to have to imagine life without them ever again.
Spock comes back into the room with David cradled to his chest. “He would like to sleep with us, please.”
Jim smiles at them, unable to help himself. He flips back the covers and scoots over to make room, saying, “By all means.”
Spock’s telepathy makes him a very good parent to a nonverbal child. Where Jim has to guess based on what he assumes David needs, Spock actually knows, especially now that he has established a parent-child bond between them.
Now, David snuggles into the space between them, cooing happily when Spock scoots closer so he’s pressed between both their chests. Jim reaches out and wraps his arm around both of them, and he feels Spock’s pleasure in that through their bond.
“That’s right,” Jim says. “My boys.”
“Hello,” Spock says. “It’s very early in the morning.”
“I don’t know if I’ll be able to go back to sleep,” Jim says. “The court martial is today.”
“I have not forgotten,” Spock replies. “But I think it would behoove you to rest as much as you can, even if you do not sleep. You must be emotionally prepared for whatever outcome you face.”
“I’m just worried about David,” Jim admits. “Not that—obviously you’ll do a great job of raising him. But I don’t want to make you.”
“It is my intention to stand with the crew,” Spock says.
“Spock, we talked about this—”
“It is my right,” Spock says. “And my privilege. My parents will gladly care for David if we are briefly detained, which I very much doubt will come to pass.”
“Your mother says she’s too old to raise another child.”
“My father is not,” Spock counters. “I have spoken to him about this. He agrees with the logic of my position.”
“Well, maybe David will learn how to pronounce his family name after all,” Jim says, bested. “I just don’t have your optimism about the results.”
“You saved the planet,” Spock says. “They may argue with your methods, but they cannot argue with the results.”
“Seems like they might.”
Spock cups his cheek, pulling him in so their foreheads touch. “They will not.”
Jim sighs, tipping his face up to kiss him. It’s hard to get too worked up over anything when they’re lying here in bed together with their baby between them, living the life he’d always been too scared to even dream of. If he could go back twenty years and tell himself that it all works out, that Spock decides it’s worth it to love him back and have kids with him, he’d have laughed in his own face. But they’re here. Jim doesn’t think he’ll ever stop marveling over it.
Even death couldn’t keep them apart.
Jim wakes up alone. He must have drifted back off after all, because the sun is shining through the window. He can hear Spock’s voice in the other room, speaking low and affectionate to David, and he finds himself smiling despite his anxieties. He loves them so much.
He stretches and then climbs out of bed to go join them, finding Spock feeding their son his breakfast.
“Good morning.”
“Good morning,” Spock replies. “David was hungry.”
“I figured,” Jim says, crossing into the kitchen to get himself a cup of coffee. “How is he?”
“His language processing skills continue to improve,” Spock says. “Although just because he can understand me doesn’t mean that he obeys.”
Jim laughs. “Yeah, that sounds about right.”
“He is your son.”
Jim smiles, coming over to drop a kiss onto the baby’s head. “He sure is.”
“Is there anything I can do to help you prepare for today?”
Jim sighs, shaking his head and taking a sip of his coffee. “Not that you haven’t already done. I wish you’d reconsider standing with us, but I know you won’t.”
“I cannot.”
“I know.” Jim leans up and kisses his cheek. “And I do love that about you. I’m just worried about David.”
“He will be alright.” Spock reaches for Jim’s hand and squeezes it. “I am quite confident they will not imprison us, and that if they do, it will not be for long.”
“I just don’t want to miss any of this,” Jim says. “I missed his whole first childhood, and watching him now—I see how precious each day is.”
“I believe that by standing with you, I increase the chances of you getting to be present for those days,” Spock says. “I believe they will not wish to imprison an innocent man.”
“Maybe,” Jim says. He takes another sip of his coffee and then moves back into the kitchen. “Have you had breakfast yet?”
Spock has decided on a dramatic statement, so he doesn’t join them in the antechamber where they’re awaiting trial. Instead he’s sitting in the courtroom with David, his father, and Gillian, acting as if he’s going to be a good little spectator. Jim is curious to see how his plan will go over with the president.
Finally, they’re called in. Spock passes David to Sarek and finds his place in their line between Jim and Bones.
“Captain Spock,” the president says. “You do not stand accused.”
“Mr. President, I stand with my shipmates,” he replies, standing tall and proud and defiant—perfectly himself. Jim has never loved him more.
“As you wish,” the president says. “The charges and specifications are conspiracy, assault on Federation officers, theft of Federation property—namely the starship Enterprise—sabotage of the USS Excelsior, willful destruction of Federation property—specifically the aforementioned USS Enterprise—and finally, disobeying the direct orders of a Starfleet commander. Admiral Kirk, how do you plead?”
When he reads it out like that, the idea that they might escape a prison sentence seems absurd. Jim really hopes Sarek and Amanda do a better job with David than they did with Spock. “On behalf of all of us, Mr. President, I’m authorized to plead guilty.”
“So entered,” the president says. “Because of certain mitigating circumstances, all charges but one are summarily dismissed.” Chatter breaks out around the room, but the president keeps going. “The remaining charge, disobeying orders of a superior officer, is directed solely at Admiral Kirk.” He looks at Jim. “I’m sure the Admiral will recognize the necessity of keeping discipline in any chain of command.”
“I do, sir,” Jim says, nerves jangling. At least Spock will be free to raise David. That’s what matters.
“James T. Kirk,” the president says. “It is the judgment of this council that you be reduced in rank to captain, and that as a consequence of your new rank, you be given the duties for which you have repeatedly demonstrated unswerving ability: the command of a starship.”
The room explodes into applause and conversation, but the president isn’t done. “Silence! Captain Kirk, you and your crew have saved this planet from its own shortsightedness, and we are forever in your debt.”
That earns them a standing ovation, and the president doesn’t bother to call the room back into order this time. Jim looks at Spock, and Spock looks back, the “I told you so” clear on his face and in his mind.
Jim sticks his mental tongue out at him and turns to shake the hand of the person coming up to congratulate him.
He shakes a lot of hands. There are a lot of grateful people here. But finally the room starts to clear out, and Gillian makes it up to him.
He smiles to see her, and she smiles to see him.
“I’m so happy for you I can’t tell ya,” she says. “Thank you, so much.”
She moves to step around him and walk out, and Jim stops her. “Wait a minute, where are you going?”
“You’re going to your ship, I’m going to mine! Science vessel.” She gestures to her civilian’s uniform. “I got three hundred years of catch-up learning to do.”
“You mean this is goodbye?” Jim had expected her to hang around a bit longer, at least until he and his crew shipped off, but apparently she’s been busy making plans for herself.
Gillian shakes her head. “Why does it have to be goodbye?”
“Well… like they say in your century, I don’t even have your telephone number.” Jim chuckles. “How will I find you?”
“Don’t worry,” she says. “I’ll find you.” She leans in and gives him a kiss on the cheek. “See you around the galaxy.”
And then she’s gone. Yet another loss. If only he didn’t get so attached to women so quickly.
But when he looks ahead, there’s Spock, holding David now as he speaks quietly to his father, and Jim can’t help but smile as he goes to lean against the wall to wait for him. He may not be any good at holding onto women, but he’s got one love that won’t ever leave him—not even if he dies, apparently.
Spock finishes with his father and comes to him, softening when he meets Jim’s eyes. “Shall we?”
Jim beams at him, reaching over to ruffle David’s hair. “Let’s.”
They walk out of the courtroom to the antechamber where the others are waiting for them, and Jim hugs everyone while Spock uses David as a convenient excuse to get out of doing so.
“I told ya they wouldnae imprison us, laddie,” Scotty says, clapping him on the back. “The wee bairn will have two fathers yet.”
“Yes, he will,” Jim says. “And he’ll grow up in space again, it sounds like.”
“Are you bringing him along?” Uhura asks. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“I’m going to see how long I can get them to delay our launch date,” Jim says. “Surely it will take them some time to find us a ship as it stands, and in a few months… why not? We’ll have to bring along a nanny, but I want him with me.”
“Children aboard starships,” Bones spits. “Don’t you care about the dangers he’ll face?”
“It will hardly be better for him to be left alone at home without his parents,” Spock says. “I would have preferred to keep our apartment and raise him here on Earth, but if this is what the Fleet has in mind for us, how can we do anything but bring him along?”
“He’s not you, Jim,” Bones says.
“No, but the situation is the same. We’re not making the same mistake.”
“So you’re going to get him killed?”
“Have I ever gotten you killed?”
“No, but you have done it to Spock. You have done it to David.”
Jim flinches, and Spock is beside him in an instant, shoulder bumping against his to bolster him. Jim gives Bones a steady look. “I’m not doing that again.”
“You may not have a choice.”
“There’s always a choice. I believe that now more than ever.”
“Gentlemen,” Spock says. “This is neither the time nor the place for this discussion. Dr. McCoy, you are welcome at our home tonight for supper. Until then, the subject is closed.”
Jim smiles up at him. “You’re right. Now’s the time to celebrate.”
“I’ll see you tonight,” Bones says, narrowing his eyes at both of them. He moves away from them, muttering about hobgoblin babies.
“Well, I think it’s lovely,” Sulu says. “We’d all love more time with our little man.”
“He will be nice to have around,” Uhura agrees. “I’m just not sure about splitting your focus between being a captain and being a father.”
“It’ll be a challenge,” Jim says. “But I’m not the first man to have done it, and I doubt I’ll be the last. If it helps me prioritize the safety of the ship, then how can that be a bad thing?”
“I feel it is not,” Spock says. “I am interested to see how your recent experiences affect your judgment as a captain all around, but I very much doubt that having our son with us will be anything but an asset to you.”
“What about to you?” Uhura asks. “Surely you’ll be affected by having your son aboard too.”
“Surely,” Spock agrees, inclining his head. “But I think it will be a positive experience for me, as well. I only regret that we will not also have our daughter.”
“How is the little lady doing?” Chekov asks. “She is settling in at the VSA?”
“She’s hardly so little, anymore,” Jim says. “But yes, I think it’s a better fit for her than Starfleet, for the moment. Who knows, perhaps she’ll change her mind again.”
“She is already telling off her instructors,” Spock says proudly. They’d gotten a letter about it last night, and Spock had been practically glowing with delight as he read it.
“That’s my wee lass,” Scotty says. “I’m sure she’ll have that school running right in no time.”
“I’m sure she will,” Jim says, smiling. “And her grandmother has certainly been enjoying having her around.”
“I never particularly intended to provide my mother with grandchildren to dote on,” Spock muses. “But it seems we have done so quite effectively.”
“Well, anything to make Amanda happy,” Jim says. “Not like we enjoy having kids or anything.”
Spock rolls his eyes and nudges his side. “Speaking of which, we should get David home. It has been a long morning, and he is due for a meal and a nap.”
“Of course,” Uhura says. “If there’s anything we can do to help, let us know.”
“And let us know when we get a ship!” Scotty adds.
“We will,” Jim says. “We’ll see all of you soon, I’m sure. Enjoy your leave while you have it.”
“Aye-aye, Captain,” Chekov says, clapping him on the shoulder. “Now go, take care of your son.”
They make their way out of the building, slowed by several more people trying to congratulate them, and by the time they get into the shuttle to go home, David is fussing in Spock’s arms.
“We will be home soon,” Spock says, voice low and soothing as he strokes David’s hair.
Jim wraps his arms around them both, holding onto them. His precious little family.
By the time they get home, David is fully crying, overtired and overstimulated, and Jim takes him into the bathroom to change him while Spock prepares lunch for all three of them.
“Hey, little baby,” Jim says. “Daddy’s here. Daddy’s got you.”
David squirms and flails as he pulls down his little pants and undoes his onesie to get at his wet diaper.
“Oh, baby, you’re soaked! That can’t feel good,” Jim sympathizes. “Daddy’s going to get you nice and dry.”
David lets out a shriek of unhappiness as the diaper is removed, and Jim strokes his little belly and clicks his tongue to soothe him.
“It’s okay, sweet one,” Jim says. “Almost there.”
He’s a practiced hand at this now, after three months, and he has the baby diapered and clothed again in no time.
“There we go, baby,” he says, scooping David to his chest and bouncing him. “That feels better, doesn’t it?”
David makes one last noise of displeasure before sighing and slumping against him, worn out.
“Let’s go see if your father has lunch ready, shall we? And then you can take a nice nap.”
“Guh,” David says.
Jim smiles. “Exactly.”
David eats about six bites of his lunch before he’s falling asleep at the table, and Spock takes pity on him and takes him to his room to sleep properly. Through the open door, Jim can hear his soft baritone murmuring to David in Vulcan.
Spock comes back out, shutting the door behind him, and Jim smiles at him.
“Still enjoying fatherhood?”
“Very much,” Spock says. “He is a delightful child.”
“Even when he’s grumpy?”
“We are the ones who kept him out too long at a function not designed for young children,” Spock says. “It is hardly his fault that he found the experience unpleasant. Tomorrow we will have to stay home and play with his blocks to compensate.”
Jim chuckles, overwhelmed with affection. “Tomorrow we have to report to Starfleet HQ for our new assignment,” he reminds him. “To discuss our timeline, and pose our intentions.”
“Do you think they will not allow us to bring David along?” Spock asks. “If so, I will abdicate the mission and remain here as a professor.”
“Let’s hope it doesn’t come to that,” Jim says. “I just got you back. I’m not ready to lose you again.”
“Most starship captains don’t have their families with them on board.”
“Maybe it’s time that changed,” Jim says. “Maybe I want the stars and I want my family.”
“You have always had a way of getting things to fall into place according to your desires.”
“Well, I got you, didn’t I?”
Spock smiles. “After much strife.”
“Well, it’s the same with David, isn’t it? And Saavik hardly came to us easily.”
“I would just prefer that we not go through the same strife getting our life set up now,” Spock says. He looks Jim in the eyes, pleading. “Retire with me. We can get a house and raise David, or stay here, close to our friends. Tell them no.”
“Tell them no? Spock, we’ve been trying to get back out there for ten years!”
“You’ve been trying to get back out there for ten years,” Spock says. “I have been raising our children and building a life here, on Earth. I can’t lie to you and say I don’t miss the adventure, but you know it’s no place for a disabled child. Not the way things stand.”
“Spock, I… I don’t know if I can do that. I don’t know if I can be… a family man… in that way.”
“Then you should never have committed us to caring for David.” Spock looks at him for a long moment, and then reaches over and touches his hand. “I know that you want what’s best for him. For all of us. I’m asking you to think about what that is.”
“I can’t believe you agree with Bones,” Jim says, at a loss.
“He is a wise man,” Spock replies. “Though I would prefer not to tell him so.”
Jim chuckles. “I should’ve known spending all that time in his head would fuck you up.”
“You know we are talking sense.”
“I don’t know any such thing.”
“All I ask is that you think about it.”
“Ugh, fine.”
Spock pats his hand, looking satisfied. “Good.”
Jim makes a face at him. “I was hoping we’d be celebrating this afternoon, but I guess not.”
“There is still much to celebrate.”
“No, I’m not in the mood.” Jim pushes back from the table and goes to the living room to sit on the couch instead. He’d wanted to get away, but of course Spock follows him, curling up beside him with his legs tucked up underneath him.
“Jim,” he says. “I am not trying to crush your dreams.”
“It feels that way.”
“Surely we can find a way to be happy that keeps David safe.”
“They just bent every rule to offer me a ship, and you want me to turn it down! You want me to say no, when we’ve just come back from an adventure that reminded me exactly why I want to be back out there!”
“I didn’t tell you you had to do anything.”
“You don’t have to.”
“You can do meaningful work here. You have been doing meaningful work here. And the most meaningful work you need to do in the next twenty years is be a father to David.”
Jim pinches the bridge of his nose. “I know that. I know that.” He exhales, scrubbing a hand over his face. “It never occurred to me that they’d offer me a ship, Spock. I’ve been begging for one for years, and now is when they finally give one to me?”
“The timing is most unfortunate.”
“What if they don’t accept my decision not to take the ship?” Jim asks. “What if they make me resign my commission?”
“That would be deeply unfortunate for all of us,” Spock says. “But I sincerely doubt it will come to that. You wouldn’t be the first parent to defer an offworld assignment due to your child’s needs.”
“I’m fifty-two years old, Spock,” Jim says. “Maybe you could defer it. All I can do is turn it down.”
“Pardon me, Jim, but there are human captains who are well into their sixties,” Spock says. “And when David is older, old enough to make an informed decision about coming with us, perhaps we can revisit the issue. We have very little way to know if he will remember any of his past life or how quickly he will mature; that day could come much sooner than for a normal child.”
“And it could just as easily come later,” Jim says. He sighs. “Either way, we probably don’t want to find that out on a starship.”
“No,” Spock agrees. “I’m sorry, Jim.”
“Me too.” Jim tips over to lean against him. “I just—I wanted it all to work out.”
“So did I.”
“Thanks for backing me up in front of the others.”
“Always.”
“Will you just hold me for a little while?”
“You need never doubt it.”
Jim sighs and settles into him, hand fidgeting with the crease in Spock’s pants. “I love you,” he says. “I love David. I’ll find a way to make it work.”
“You’re right and I’m stupid,” Jim says as he opens the door for Bones that evening. “Please don’t rub it in.”
Bones looks at him and then looks at Spock, putting the finishing touches on their meal in the kitchen. “Talked some sense into him, did you?”
“Once his emotions had calmed, it was evident what needed to be done.”
“And what is it that you’re going to do?” Bones crosses to the table, where David is already seated in his high chair, and ruffles his hair.
“We’re not going,” Jim says. “David needs us, and David needs to be somewhere safer than a starship. So we aren’t going to go.”
“Oh, hell,” Bones says. “Really?”
“Really,” Jim says. “Like I said, don’t rub it in.”
“Who are you and what have you done with Jim Kirk?”
“I got married. Had a baby. That changes things.”
“Having a baby didn’t stop you the first time around.”
“Carol didn’t want me to be in his life,” Jim says. “I don’t know what I’d have done if she asked me to come home and take care of him, because she didn’t. She told me to stay away.”
“Because everybody and their mother knew the man who fast-tracked himself to the command chair was never going to sit at home and be a family man, I assume.”
“Probably,” Jim admits. “And because she and I didn’t have anything like a functional relationship. But my priorities have changed a lot since then. I can still have adventures without being the captain of a starship, and I want to be here for my son.”
“Spock?”
“He didn’t require much convincing,” Spock says, coming out with a hot dish and setting it in the middle of the table. “He saw the logic of the situation on his own.”
“I just don’t believe it. Jim Kirk, turning down a starship.”
“Don’t act like it’s such a shock. I’ve been taking steps toward settling down for years.”
“And every one of them has been a shock,” Bones says, sitting down in the chair Spock indicates for him. “When you two announced your engagement after that nightmare of a mission…”
“During which he kissed me in front of you,” Jim says. “Quite extensively, as I recall.”
Bones waves his hand. “That’s not the point. The point is the two of you were nowhere near ready to get engaged when he showed up on the ship, and then after one—no doubt passionate!—night back together, you decided to get married! Threw us all for a loop, I’ll tell you.”
“Well,” Jim says. “It was a very passionate night.”
Bones makes a disgusted face. “And I don’t want to hear another word about it.”
“Once we decided, we’d decided,” Spock says, bringing over the last dish and sitting down with them. “There was very little point in wasting more time than we already had.”
“And when you adopted your little girl?”
“There was also little point in wasting time,” Spock says. He begins dishing out the meal, calm as anything, as if his life choices aren’t being called into question. “She needed us immediately.”
“I suppose,” Bones says. “I’m just saying, it seems like you never really stopped and decided to settle down with a husband and kids, it just kind of happened to you.”
“Maybe it did,” Jim says. “But I wouldn’t trade it. Not for all the stars in space. And you can’t argue that David doesn’t need the care.”
“Now that’s the first reasonable thing you’ve said,” Bones says. “And I suppose I can’t let any other fool take over doctoring him. What’s the plan then? Retirement?”
“We’re going to speak to the brass about deferring the assignment,” Jim says. “And if that doesn’t work, yeah. Retirement.”
“Retirement,” Bones says. “To be a stay-at-home dad?”
“Hopefully not,” Jim says. “I really would lose my mind. But to take care of my son, yes. There’s plenty of work to be done in San Francisco.”
“So you’re planning to stay here?”
“For now,” Spock says. “Although there’s no reason we have to stay here permanently. Perhaps we will return to Jim’s family farm in Iowa.”
“Or go somewhere else entirely,” Jim says. “I hear Mars colony is a nice place to raise a family. Or we could travel further abroad—join a colonist ship bound for the frontier, maybe. Go to a starbase and work on some science project.”
“You’ve got family from Earth too, don’t you, Spock?” Bones asks. “Where are they from?”
“My grandparents lived in Seattle,” Spock says. “But we did not have much in the way of a family homestead, and they have been dead for years.”
“Still, I wouldn’t be opposed to heading up there,” Jim muses. “I hear it’s nice.”
“I enjoyed it well enough as a child,” Spock agrees. “Although it was unpleasantly cold and wet.”
“Speaking of grandparents,” Bones says. “Has anyone told Winona about the baby?”
Jim rolls his eyes. “Of course we have.”
“And?”
“She says she’d love to meet him, if it works out.”
“But she’s not going to make an effort. Of course.” Bones snorts. “That woman, I swear to god.”
“What can you do,” Jim says, shrugging. “I don’t expect anything else anymore.”
Bones tips his glass to that, and they all spend a few minutes eating.
David shouts, flinging his peas at Spock, and Spock very patiently wipes them up and moves the rest out of David’s way, offering him some mashed potatoes instead.
“It’s so funny to see you being a dad,” Bones says. “I mean, you’ve been a dad. Obviously. But not to a baby.”
“It is… different,” Spock agrees. “Saavik knew how to consume food and use a toilet long before we adopted her. David cannot even speak.”
“Spock is so good at this,” Jim says. “It took me months to figure out things Spock has gotten the hang of in days.”
“I have an advantage,” Spock says, wiggling his fingers. “I know what he’s thinking. I know what he wants and needs.”
“True,” Jim allows. “Which is very handy. Although sometimes even giving him exactly what he wants doesn’t seem to make him happy.”
“That’s babies for you,” Bones says. “Their emotions are big and not at all logical.”
“I find that David operates on a logic all his own,” Spock says fondly. “It is fascinating to observe.”
Jim chuckles. “You would say that.”
“He is my son.”
Jim feels his smile widen, and he reaches over and touches Spock’s hand. “He sure is.”
“You’re really going to stay home and play happy families, aren’t you?” Bones says. “I didn’t believe it, before. But you both look so committed.”
“There will be no playing,” Spock says. “We are a family, and we are going to build a life of contentment for our son.”
There’s some debate over who should go to the meeting with Admiral Anderson in the morning. Spock wants to come, and bring David, but Jim convinces him that it’s best for him to go alone. Spock was right, David deserves to have some time to enjoy himself after what they put him through yesterday, and this meeting will surely go better if it’s not being interrupted by a baby—even if the baby is the subject.
“We’ve got you scheduled to ship out in two weeks,” Admiral Anderson says. “I think you’ll be pleased with the ship. And your pick of crew, of course.”
“Brian,” Jim says.
The admiral stops, looking at him. “What is it, Jim?”
“I don’t know how to say this.” Jim smiles, shaking his head and spreading his hands. “But I can’t ship out in two weeks. Or even this year.”
“What? You’ve been down here asking me for a ship for years, and now you say no?”
Jim gives him another smile, shrugging. “My husband and I just got custody of my intellectually disabled two-year-old,” he says. “His mother doesn’t want him. There’s no one else to take him. He can hardly come along. So we can’t go.”
“I’d heard about your son,” Brian Anderson says, sitting back and straightening his uniform. “But I never expected to hear Jim Kirk turn down a captain’s chair because he couldn’t find a babysitter.”
Jim tries for an open expression. “It’s more complicated than that.”
“Yes, I’d imagine it is.” Brian shakes his head. “Well, I have to say I’m surprised. We expected you to jump on this.”
“I’d prefer to defer it rather than just turn it down,” Jim says. “We talked about it, and maybe when David is a little bit older, he could come along, or we’d be comfortable leaving him. But with everything, right now… we can’t.”
“And after that stunt you just pulled, I can hardly expect you to go out there without your husband,” Brian says. “I’m glad they’re not dead, but I’ll be sorry to lose you for this mission.”
“I’m sorry to miss out,” Jim agrees. “But I have to think about what’s best for my family.”
“’Course you do, Jim,” Brian says. “There’ll be other ships. We’re not going to force you off world when you’ve just saved the planet.”
“Spock will be relieved to hear that.” Jim smiles. “He was ready to bring the baby in and give you a stern talking to if you refused.”
Brian chuckles. “Now that’s something I’d like to see. That eyebrow that makes you feel about two feet tall, combined with a little tyke.”
“I can’t tell you how cute they are together, Brian. It’s really something.”
“I don’t know if ‘cute’ is a word I’d use to describe Captain Spock,” Brian says, laughing. “But to each their own, I suppose.”
“He really is precious with David,” Jim says, smiling broadly. “We’ll have to have you over for dinner soon, since it seems like we’ll be staying in the area for a while.”
“I’d love to meet the little man,” Brian says. “We’ll find a time. It’s been good to see you, Jim, but you’ve given me quite the puzzle to solve here, finding a new captain for the Enterprise on such short notice.”
“The Enterprise?”
“It was going to be a surprise,” Brian says. “We’ve got a new Enterprise all ready to go, and we wanted you for her. If not you, then Spock. Since you’re both out of commission, that puts us in a difficult position.”
“Sorry about that,” Jim says. “The baby was… unexpected.”
“And not in the way a baby usually would be.”
“Ha, no,” Jim says. “But he and Spock have really taken to each other, and I can’t say it isn’t nice to get a second chance.”
“I can imagine,” Brian says, standing and adjusting his uniform. “Well, enjoy the family life, then. We’ll see you soon.”
In the shuttle on the way home, Jim gets a message with the paperwork to fill out for paternity leave. He supposes it is the logical next step, although the idea of months at home with nothing to do is intimidating.
Still, he’s halfway through filling it out by the time he arrives at the apartment. Child’s date of birth is going to be a complicated one.
Spock comes and pulls him into an embrace as soon as he’s through the door, smothering him with relief, affection, and pride.
“It was no big deal,” Jim says, embarrassed. “They said ‘sure, no problem, apply for paternity leave.’”
“It was a big deal for you,” Spock says, stepping back and kissing their fingers together instead. “And I am proud of you for doing what needed to be done.”
“He offered me the Enterprise,” Jim says. “The Enterprise, Spock.”
Spock raises an eyebrow. “That is quite the temptation.”
Jim shakes his head. “I thought about you and David and I knew what I had to do.”
Spock smiles, tangling their fingers together and pulling him into the living room, where David is on the floor, methodically stacking blocks. He’s sitting on the blanket Amanda knitted for him, wearing a little yellow ducky onesie that Uhura picked out for him, and Jim couldn’t possibly love him more.
He lowers himself to the floor beside him and places a block on the structure, and he feels approval radiate through his marriage bond as Spock comes to sit on David’s other side.
“How’s he doing today?” Jim asks.
Spock shakes his head. “There have been no new developments. The blocks remain his favorite toy.”
“You have your father to thank for that,” Jim says. “He’d spend hours down on the floor playing blocks with him.”
“Fascinating,” Spock says. “I was always encouraged to engage with more… intellectual toys.”
“Probably not when you were only three months old.”
“True,” Spock allows. “If we account for the fact that David only has three months worth of existence to draw from for experience, he is quite advanced.”
“He’s a very advanced three-month-old, a slightly delayed two-year-old, or a very messed up twenty-five-year-old,” Jim says. “Really, he’s all three.”
“Yes.” Spock lifts a block and puts it in place. “I am grateful that I left the planet at approximately the same age I was when I died. While I cannot be certain that it is exact, it is… close enough.”
“Right,” Jim says. “And a few years difference in aging don’t really matter that much in the long run. You’re still an adult, and we were able to get you your katra back, so you have your memories. You have all your experience, still, even if it’s a little mixed up.”
“It gets better every day,” Spock says. “And it is much better since we restored our marriage bond.”
“But David doesn’t have that,” Jim says. “David just has himself fully regrown from nothing. He’s got to relearn everything. He’s learning fast, but he’s nearly two years behind.”
“He is learning quickly,” Spock agrees. “His comprehension in Standard and in Vulcan is improving daily. He now understands most words he has a frame of reference for.”
“We’re going to have to start being careful what we say around him.”
“Yes,” Spock confirms. “He may already be at a point where our conversation is not beyond him.”
“I hope he understands when we tell him that we love him,” Jim says.
“He knows.” Spock sets one hand on Jim and one hand on David and opens his mind, connecting them through him.
David burbles in surprise, falling over into Jim’s leg, and Jim can feel it. He can feel the odd way David sees the world, simple and clear and unfocused and without real worry.
Hi, baby, he says into the bond. I love you.
David responds with his own wave of wordless affection, reaching for him. Jim scoops him up, scooting closer to Spock so they can keep the contact, and tucks his head against David’s.
“He… loves me?”
“Very much,” Spock says, thumb rubbing against Jim’s shoulder. “You’re his daddy.”
“Oh,” Jim says, and his eyes inexplicably fill with tears.
Spock takes his hand off of David, breaking the connection between them, and instead folds them both in his arms. “It’s going to be alright, Jim,” he says. “We love you.”
“I gave up the Enterprise,” Jim says. “They gave her back to me, and I gave her up. Again.”
“I know,” Spock says. “I know, ashayam. I’m sorry.”
“He loves me,” Jim says. “You love me. And I—god help me, I love the two of you more than anything. Than anything, Spock. But this is… a lot to ask.”
“Think of it as a new adventure,” Spock says. “One we are embarking on as a family. Surely the results will be just as unpredictable.”
Jim chuckles. “Yeah.”
Spock brushes a kiss against his forehead. “It will be alright,” he soothes. “You’ll see.”