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Abed was always extra affectionate in the mornings. No, that wasn’t quite right. Abed was always very clingy in the mornings. By clingy, Troy didn’t mean emotionally. That wasn’t really Abed’s style. Troy meant octopus clingy or saran wrap clingy. Ever since they started dating, they had been sharing a bed, and during the night, Abed would inevitably get tangled with Troy. Long limbs wrapped around Troy in ways he never thought possible, thin fingers curled in Troy’s shirt or splayed over his face.
Troy had learned the hard way that Abed didn’t like to be woken up before he was ready to be awake. That wasn’t usually an issue, since Abed was an early riser and Troy liked to sleep in. One time, however, Troy had woken from a particularly vicious nightmare. He had climbed halfway up the bunk bed ladder in order to shake Abed awake and was awarded with a snort that managed to sound angrier than anything Abed could have said, and a rough push to the chest. Troy had been dislodged from the ladder and ended up crashing to the floor, resulting in a bruised tailbone. Abed had clearly felt bad about it, which meant that he felt really, really terrible about it, but from then on, Troy did his best to avoid waking up Abed.
Unfortunately, this now meant on the rare occasions Troy woke up before Abed, he was stuck until Abed woke up and disentangled himself. Today was one of those days. Abed had somehow managed to get half underneath Troy while still mostly being pressed against Troy’s back. One of Abed’s legs was thrown over Troy, while the other seemed impossibly tangled with Troy’s own legs. Abed’s arms were wrapped around Troy painfully tight, pinning one of Troy’s arms to his side. Troy’s head was pressed against the underside of Abed’s chin. Troy could hear Abed making soft snuffling sleep noises. Troy had no idea how Abed could sleep in this supremely uncomfortable position. To make things worse, Troy really really had to pee.
Troy was going to have to attempt the impossible: escape his boyfriend’s noodle-like appendages while making sure Abed stayed asleep. Troy tried extricating his arm first. He first tried to gently lift Abed’s arm off of him with his free hand, but a grunt from Abed cut that plan short. He had to settle on slowly pulling his arm loose. There were a few tense moments, but eventually Troy had worked it free… only for Abed to immediately shift, wrapping his arm around Troy’s newly liberated bicep. This made it impossible for Troy to put said arm down, so it was stuck stupidly up in the air. Troy sighed softly. Abed’s other hand crawled up Troy’s stomach. Troy had to bite his lower lip hard to keep from giggling at the tickling feeling. The effort not to laugh only put more pressure on his bladder. He couldn’t stifle a low whine. He squirmed uncomfortably. Abed made another discontented noise and Troy was forced to still himself. So this was how he died. In a stupid pose and in desperate need of the bathroom. What an anticlimactic end. He had been hoping for zombies, at the very least.
Annie suddenly popped into the fort, plate of pancakes in hand. She giggled at the sight of them. Troy shot a heated glare her way. Couldn't she see he was suffering? She seemed unperturbed by Troy's expression and mouthed “I made pancakes” silently, before setting the plate on their bedside table.
“Pancakes.” Abed’s voice came suddenly, startling Troy and making him tense. Abed unraveled himself from Troy with little fanfare and slid out of the bed. He grabbed the plate, making his way out of the fort and to the kitchen table. Sweet freedom! Troy leaped out of bed and embraced Annie suddenly, making her squeak in surprise.
“You’re a hero, Annie,” with that, he rushed to the toilet, leaving Annie standing in the blanket fort alone, looking confused.
“Thank you?”