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Operation McDonalds

Summary:

I don't even know how to explain this.
Uh... C4-621 sure loves McDonalds!

Notes:

here's another story I shat out for no reason
who cares about ""quality""

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

MAIN SYSTEM.

MISSION BRIEFING.

 

“Got a job for you, 621.”

              “This one is more unique than usual. The request comes from an off-world company that wants to muscle their way into Rubicon.”

              The computer shook, depicting a red backdrop before a large yellow M showed up.

              MCDONALDS CORPORATION.

              “You saw the message, I hope I don’t need to elaborate about who we are and what we represent,” a tired voice said over the comms. “Let’s just get this done and over with.”

              Another picture opened, this time showing a slightly different version of the same logo.

              MCDONALDS RUBICON OPERATIONS LLC.

              “In the original speech, I had to say a lot of legal bullshit, but to cut things short, several years ago we created a new subsidiary that we planned to use in our acquisition of Rubicon and it’s Coral.”

              The picture changed to a different scene, this time of an army stomping across an empty factory.

              “Things should’ve gone smooth, but the brass fucked up.”

              One member of the army began to set up an elaborate device, and residue Coral in the air began to pull towards it.

              “They wanted to test a Coral device that was created after the Fires of Ibis, a Coral device we thought would change the entire fast-food industry.”

              “But after the troops turned the device on… everything went dark.”

              The machine pulsed a single red, a loud agonizing noise was heard, and the image went dark.

              “Everyone we sent afterwards also went dark. Their sensors were blocked while in that building, so we don’t even know what happened.”

              “…”

              “Employee, we need you to figure out what the hell is going on and see if you can stop it… before it’s too late.”

              The call ended and Handler Walter took over the call once again.

              “Like I said, 621. It’s interesting.”

              “I don’t trust these large fast-food corporations. For all we know they could’ve sent us complete lies for an ambush. But the pay is well, and if this isn’t a trap, you could gain influence beyond any mercenary on this planet.”

              “The decision is up to you, 621.”

              Walter cut away, leaving Raven alone, staring at the screen in brooding contemplation.

              Ayre spoke up.

              << Raven… I have a feeling that they’re not lying. >>

              Her voice had a shiver to it. Raven never heard her so scared before.

              << I heard the Coral scream. >>

              << Even when they burned, they didn’t make a noise. >>

              << The humans, what did they do? >>

               << Raven, what they created might be a threat to both Coral AND humanity. >>

              Raven stared at their arms, covered with scars and missing chunks of flesh because of their fourth-generation surgery. They didn’t even have it the worst.

              It didn’t take a second longer before Raven accepted the mission and began customizing their mech for the occasion.

              “I wasn’t sure if you were going to take the deal,” Walter said as Raven continued to change different parts of their set up.

              A shotgun for pure power, a flamethrower for bio threats, a grenade launcher on the shoulder for crowd control, and laser blade for when things get tight. A good enough build, along with several light parts as to increase speed.

              “But remember, 621. Remember what I said in that mission where BAWS went empty: expect the unexpected.”

 

MAIN SYSTEM

COMBAT MODE ACTIVATE

 

“Main system, activating combat mode.”

              Raven stomped down a dark tunnel, core shining a bright light in front of them. The footprints left by earlier squads were obvious, so they just followed that, waving through dust and the occasional cracks that let dripping water in.

              It was a good place to have a secret base, especially since it was insulated enough that most chatter wouldn’t come through. But Raven, even in their mech that was shorter than usual, was touching the ceiling and their weapons kept brushing against the walls. Maybe they should’ve have gone with tank legs or tetrapods instead.

              Continuing to stomp down the tunnel, they turned a corner, when Raven heard Ayre gasp.

              Raven turned their flamethrower towards what they sensed she was looking at and saw tiny beads of Coral drift through the tunnel.

              << They’re here. >>

              << It should be impossible but they’re here. >>

              << And I hear what calls them. >>

              << Music. >>

              Raven watched as the Coral went down the same path that the footprints were going on and followed it slowly.

              Tracing the Coral as it flowed through the tunnel, as more and more Coral began to appear. Until the density was so thick that they could barely see what was in front of them.

              So, when they began to hear that sizzling noise, they stopped.

              << Raven, look bellow you. >>

              Raven leaned down and touched what seemed to be a puddle of water. Before lifting their mechanical finger up and saw a drooping yellowish orange substance that had boiling liquid squelching from it. Scanning it, they sensed it was grease and burning oil.

              The scan of the area also revealed another thing: a destroyed MT collapsed on the corner. Carefully wadding through the grease, Raven stepped next to the MT, realizing that it was stuck to the wall by a thick layer of fat and grease.

              The machine itself was beginning to dissolve, metal skin melting away to innards of wire and circuitry. It was dissolving so fast that Raven couldn’t tell what destroyed it, even while looking closer at the flesh deep within. What they could see was the cockpit, which had yellow tendrils growing from it.

              No, not tendrils but French Fries.

              << Made for the Coral. Made to trap us. >>

              << While we head towards the music. >>

              Raven narrowed their eyes before firing their flamethrower and burning the remaining MT to slush. There were no orders that they can’t destroy anything, and it was better to be safe than sorry. Ayre made a sorrowful noise, Raven figuring she was mourning the lost Coral within.

              After finishing their job, they continued down the tunnel. Every step churning the grease and making it scream by spluttering out even more fat. Oil began to drip from the ceiling and splatter Raven, who sighed at the amount of cleanup they were going to do after this.

              The tunnel widened slightly the further they went down the path and no longer did their body take up the entire space. But that space made the darkness more oppressive as the light couldn’t cover everything. Shadows danced and mocked Raven for their inability to see any further. Their sensor was getting corrupted and barely worked. Everything felt heavier, their steps, the grease, the feeling that something was terribly off.

              Raven could swear they could smell that disgusting stench even though their AC was airtight and made for space.

              But through sheer will they managed to push down the tunnel until they couldn’t even see the metal anymore but endless, endless, dripping fat. With the occasional rotting MT devoured in the grease, French Fry tendrils like weeds infested the entire tunnel. Raven stepped as far away as they could from the things, setting them on fire as much as they could, but eventually just gave up.

              There were too many bodies and not enough ammo. They had to move on, whether they and Ayre liked it or not. Except she wasn’t saying anything anymore, her presence dimmed.

              Raven picked up their step. The longer they stay here, the worse it becomes.

              The tunnel continued to grow, and more formations began to appear. Stalactites of grease formed around the floor and ceiling, which should’ve been impossible considering how long it takes for that to happen. Slimily white gloop that looked like fish gills grew around the wall, looking alive as they flapped uselessly.

              It would be a miracle to any scientist, but Raven didn’t take much time to investigate anything else. Running their lights across the wall, brushing by the French Fry tendrils when-

              << The music. It’s getting louder. >>

              Raven froze.

              The darkness began to laugh.

              They typed on their keyboard.

              Are you okay? Should we stop?

              << It’s so beautiful, yet so terrible at the same time. >>

              Red spots suddenly glowing in the dark.

              At least five of them.

              Perhaps even more.

              A slight tremble in the ground.

              << It’s my dream but twisted. >>

              A movement in the darkness and Raven barely boosted away as a claw smashed against the ground they were standing on.

              Raven didn’t have much time to see what attacked them when they sensed more movement and dodged again. Running out of energy, they activated their flamethrower and torched the area around them, aim wonky due to the lack of a sensor.

              The fire still hit several of the opponents and made them burn, but Raven couldn’t find out what they looked like. Just that they were broad figures, large and foreboding, several appendages coming from their corrupt bodies.

              <<  It’s my… it’s our path. >>

              Raven decided enough was enough and fired a grenade from their right shoulder.

              The enemies reacted instantly, jumping to the side, before scrambling towards Raven. Raven boosted against a wall, kicking off it, just before they were crushed. Swinging their blade, and slashing them with sizzling energy.

              There was a sensation of hitting flesh but there wasn’t much reaction from the enemy. So much so that the monster they hit grabbed their leg and sent them smashing down. Raven felt their entire body shake as they hit the slick ground, but boosted away before the monster could hold them tight.

              Using their left shoulder, they switched their sword with a laser shot gun, and fired, the energy blasts slamming into their grabber. The grabber stumbled back but several more came to replace the enemy, rushing as fast as they could, swinging wildly. Raven was smashed about, several blades ramming into their body and forcing them to stumble.

              << Raven… you have to… escape. >>

              Raven growled and fired their shotgun again at a jumping attacker before Assault Boosting away. Their jets on full burn and zooming with no idea where they could go, they carried down the hell hole at max speed before finally loosing energy and slamming down for a few seconds.

              Looking down the next part of the tunnel, Raven noticed that it was filled with those French Fry tendrils, piles of destroyed MT’s thrown around without care.

              Enemies could be hiding there; Raven didn’t know what else this place had to hide.

              But Raven could hear the ground shake as the monsters behind them began to attack. So boosted into the tunnel, zipping down it. Getting slapped by the tendrils and slowed down by darkness, Ravin barely had time to notice more enemies running in.

              Before jumping right at them and swinging hard.

              Raven cursed and shot a grenade, making the crowd move apart. That didn’t stop several blows slamming against them, and Raven barely made it past without breaking.

              << The… tendrils talk. >>

              << Don’t let them… touch you. >>

              Raven felt annoyed that she didn’t tell them earlier, but they was nothing they could do about that anymore. One thing to learn was that fire didn’t seem to alert the tendrils, it was only when they touched anything metallic.

              It was useless knowledge now that the entire cavern is after them, but they could at least avoid alerting more.

              Assault boosting with the remaining energy they had, they paid more attention to where they were going, and avoided any tendrils with gusto.

              << You’re… so close… I can fully feel it… the beginning… of beauty… >>

              <…>

              Raven’s energy ran out again and hell arrived.

              The attack came almost instantly.

              A swipe to Raven’s shoulder made them go down to one knee but they swirled around and blasted the beast point blank. Before lighting fire to the world and causing the surrounding monsters to at least back away.             

              Switching back to their sword, they swung hard at one of the beasts, knocking them down. They didn’t have enough time to punish that knock down as two other monsters crawled at Raven and tried to drag them down.

              Raven was forced to shoot a grenade, an explosion rattling them and the beasts, but causing confusion for a moment. They then sent another dose of fire to burn the enemies before jumping to the sky to get their sense of direction back.

              At this point, Raven got a good look at these beasts, and they were just as ugly as they thought. They looked like standard MTs that had AC parts sewn on them with gunk and prayers, and looked like they were going to fall apart any moment with the French Fries growing from their head. Several arms and legs were also glued on and there didn’t seem to be any obvious center of gravity. However, their core was positively bursting with red energy, and the stance they took made them look rabid and vicious.

              Did that make sense why one was jumping in their face at the speed of a raging bull?

              No but when Raven didn’t have time to question anything when they were slapped with the force of several trucks.

              Then getting hit by other berserk assholes and forced back again and again.

              Stuck in a brutal back and forth that was slow yet fast at the same time.

              Taking step after step, bruise after bruise.

              Their attacks weren’t the most damaging, but they had so much impact that it felt like they were stuck in that transportation container again.

              Back and back until AP fell from 50% to 30% and even lower than that.

              Until what seemed like ages had passed.

              With one last slice, the last beast fell.

              Leaving Raven alone and gasping.

              No supply crate… I have to do the rest by myself.

              Catching their breath, Raven waited for a couple of minutes of rest. They felt like they wanted to just sleep right there but duty calls. So, they got up, and did one last scan with their flashlight, making sure nobody was around them.

              Before typing to Ayre:

              How close am I to the end? What’s our status?

              Ayre didn’t respond for a while but eventually they began to hear a mumble.

              << It’s more than the strings now. >>

              She didn’t sound like she was struggling anymore but her voice was so hollow that Raven began to feel even more concern.

<< I hear the piano. The violin. >>

              But there wasn’t going any back, so the Raven assumed that they were getting close enough and carried forward.

              Moving forward, the French Fries began to decrease until there was almost none of them (thank the Coral), but the grease was even worse. Thicker yet somehow less viscous, it slowed movement on the ground. It was also turning a shade of red, beginning to occasionally bubble up and break like it was lava.

              Raven decided after some time stuck on the floor, to jump instead. Occasionally hanging in the air before falling back down.

              Falling up and down, up and down.

              Monotonous but nerve wracking as any corner could hide an enemy.

              As they continued deeper down the abyss.

              As it got redder and redder.

              As the tunnel began to close again.

              The heat becoming so oppressive that even Raven’s alarms were saying it was getting too much.

              Claustrophobia was coming back at full force and this time it felt like they were stuck in a person’s throat. The land itself convulsing and closing and-

              An open mouth.

              << I hear it! The orchestra, in its full beauty! >>

              The place where the grease converges.

              A circular room, mostly flat, but the roof was curved and high. In the middle, a single machine, connected by the grease which acted as a massive spiderweb. Around the edges of the room sat French Fries which acted like candles to a holy shrine.

              As soon as the Raven entered the room, the machine began to pulse a red.

              Raven tried to fire a grenade at the machine, but a blue shield blocked it from any damage.

              That was when it happened.

              There was no voice to taunt Raven, there was no fanfare, there was nothing as the machine shook and a massive hamburger was formed out of nowhere. Except with tank legs made from pickles, and several canons strapped to its back.

              << The instruments. >>

              Ayre chanted.

              << The devourer and its personal Hound. >>

              Raven would’ve laughed in pure delusional agony if it wasn’t for the fact that the massive Hamburger was charging at them with full force.

              Forced to boost to the side, Raven cringed as they trampled over the French Fries, remembering what happened before. This time, it was the machine that reacted, turning towards the Raven, and firing a massive beam of Coral energy.

              Raven jumped to the side, but the laser still clipped them…

              Making their left arm churn to ashes.

              << Our goals are the same. >>

              << Destroy, destroy, destroy! >>

              Raven ignored Ayre and fired their flamethrower at the hamburger, making it scream in pain as it charred. While opening its mouth, it decided to fire several Chicken McNuggets into the sky.

              Raven was forced to dodge again as the Chicken McNuggets touched the ground and exploded, releasing a cloud of smoke. For a moment, they couldn’t see where they were, but they could still hear the burger charge.

              So, they hopped to the sky just as the hamburger crashed against the wall and trampled over the French Fries.

              The machine screamed and fired a beam, smashing the hamburger.

              The hamburger was stunned so Raven took advantage. They were still automatically reloading their grenade launcher, so they could only continue to fire their flamethrower, but it was good enough as the hamburger began to turn even darker and charred.

              Which happened to make it even angrier, and their own flamethrowers began to pop out. Spinning in circles, the Burger torched the area around it, and Raven was forced to fly into the sky again. But the burger wasn’t done yet and while Raven was flying, it fired several of its cannons.

              Turns out, it’s hard to dodge in the sky, and Raven was knocked down by one of the missiles.

              Tumbling down and rolling across the floor, their vision darkening.

              Ringing.

              They barely got up to their feet, almost sliding onto the French Fries.

              The hamburger laughed at the sight, it’s bellowing loud and clear.

              Raven took the insult in stride by getting their grenade launcher ready and firring straight into its mouth.

              The hamburger swallowed it and gagged before imploding inside out.

              However, the thing was still alive and turned towards Raven, steam coming from its mouth.

              Raven ditched their flamethrower on the ground.

              A ringing noise was playing through their ears, they couldn’t hear anything.

              The two fighters stared each other down.

              << Endings and Beginnings. >>

              Ayre giggled.

              << They are the same thing. >>

              The hamburger opened its mouth again, spraying Chicken McNuggets. Raven Assault Boosted forward, zipping through the air and made a sharp turn before any explosions hit them.

              The cannons on the hamburger decided to fire and Raven stopped their Assault Boost, falling on the floor right before getting smashed by any explosions.

              The hamburger roared and flames came out of its jets.

              Ravenn pushed through the flame before jumping high into the sky.

              Raising a single fist, their only fist.

              Right above the beast and slamming down.

              Piercing through the bun and right through the patty and other condiments. Crushing an entire hole in the system.

              The hamburger died without any ceremony, just like its birth.

              The ringing was getting louder.

              Raven hopped from the hole they made and approached the machine in the middle.

              They didn’t bother to look back and give the destroyed enemy any sign of respect. Instead stopping right in front of the machine and scanning it.

              Its shield was flickering, damaged by the battle between the two.

              Raven just began to punch the shield again and again, repeating their success with the hamburger, and destroying the plasma shield. Once that happened, they threw the machine on the floor, and made it skid across the ground.

              Making sure to not explode it and cause a Coral incident, they instead stomped on it.

              The ringing was ear bleeding.

              They continued to stomp on it.

              Just stomp and stomp and stomp and stomp and stomp and stomp and stomp and stomp and stomp and stomp and-

 

MISSION COMPLETE

 

 

NOTFICATION

 

“One new message.”

              “621…”

              Walter’s voice said over the comms, sounding genuinely flabbergasted.

              “I… don’t have much to say. I made the company pay you a bigger sum. Maybe you can buy some new parts with that.”

              “…”

             “Just get some rest. That’s an order and this time… actually follow it.”

              The call ended, leaving Raven staring at the ceiling. Countless tubes were attached to their body pumping drugs and numbing serums and a bunch of other random crap that they couldn’t care less about.

              Ayre appeared in their head.

              << I’m sorry, Raven. >>

              << I… the machine was manipulating me by the end. >>

              << The pull, it was just too much.  >>

              << I wished I… was stronger. >>

              Raven couldn’t say anything, no computer next to their body, and just continued to stare at the ceiling. Their fingers were flinching though, wanting to write, wanting to say something, anything.

              << I’ll leave you alone for a while. >>

              Ayre said, filled with sorrow.

              << Like what your Handler said, get some rest. >>

              Her voice disappeared and Raven was left alone.

              They felt like they wanted to cry but their body didn’t let them, the numbing serum starting to kick in. So instead, they continued to feel emptiness, waiting until time ticked by.

              Feeling an utter sense of disappointment and defeat.

Notes:

One of my favorite things to do is take an incredibly stupid idea seriously.
I think it's very funny but maybe that's just me.
I think this might remind people of Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs, similiar ideas.