Work Text:
A = Aftercare (What are they like after sex)
Aftercare isn’t the best since Outbreak. Water isn’t necessarily scarce but it’s not like you are going to be lounging in a bath. Especially on the road when you need it to drink. Normally it’s wiping his cum off your skin if he’s painted your ass or belly. Wiped you down with a cleanish rag and either tucking it in his pocket or tossing it into the fire. Then you both need to correct your clothes and get some rest or stand watch.
B = Body Part (Their favorite body part on themselves and on their partner)
Eyes. He loves looking in your eyes, they are expressive. They tell him what you are thinking and he swears that he can see a little bit of the past in them. The way things used to be. He also loves your ass. He gets to watch it in a pair of jeans as you walk up the stairs or in front of him. Watching it bounce when he’s fucking you from behind and can grab handfuls of it. Loves your ass.
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum - I am a disgusting person)
Joel refuses to cum inside you. Refuses . There’s too much of a risk of pregnancy and he can’t have that on his conscience in this world. Some people might be okay with having children, bringing them into this fucked up world, but he can’t. Not when he lost Sarah on Outbreak Day. Everytime, he will either pull out and jerk off on your skin or the ground. He won’t ask you to suck him off unless there’s been a recent bath.
D = Dirty Secret (What do they secretly want)
Joel craves normalcy. He wants to be able to go back in time to when the world wasn’t in chaos and he had his life back. He knows that can’t happen but he dreams about a time where he could just live a slow, safe existence. Maybe with you, he’s still young enough to father children. Not to replace Sarah, he could never do that. But to celebrate her. It’s a sweet dream, and sometimes it’s the only thing that keeps him going even it’s just a fantasy.
E = Experience (Do they know what they are doing?)
Joel is a 56 year old MAN , who has plenty of experience under the belt. He’s not some untried boy who can’t last more than 30 seconds. He doesn’t have as much experience as some, but he’s got enough to make sure you cum when you sleep with him. He’s tried all the major positions and kinks at least once in his life.
F = Favorite Position (Self explanatory)
From behind. Just because it’s easier when the two of you are out on the road. When you’re enclosed in four walls with a secure door, it’s missionary. He wants to look into your eyes and wrap his arms around you and pull you close. Feel you move under him. He has to pull out a few seconds earlier when he’s in missionary so he can make sure that he doesn’t spill inside you.
G = Goofy (Are they serious during sex or goofy?)
There’s not a whole hell of a lot to be goofy about. His sense of humor died about twenty years ago. When he’s actually inside you, he’s serious, although he is softer than you ever imagined him to be when you first met Joel Miller. Serious is the name of the game but he makes up for a lack of humor during sex with amazing grunts and sexy groans in your ear.
H = Hair (Are they well groomed?)
He is lucky that he’s not a very hairy man because no, he’s not meticulously groomed. He’s lucky if he’s freshly bathed.
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment?)
Intimacy is actually soft with Joel. There are those brown eyes that are gorgeously focused on you. Looking deep into your eyes and connecting with you. Even if he’s never told you everything, he’s more open with you while he’s between your thighs than probably any other time. Laying himself bare, he will be more in touch with you in that moment than any other.
J = Jack Off (Do they masturbate?)
Absolutely. There’s been more masturbation than sex in Joel Miller’s life. He was single for a very long time after Sarah’s mother left him with a baby. He hadn’t had time for dating, nor had he wanted to have women in and out of his daughter’s life. So jerking off was a must. After the outbreak, there was a little more sex for him, mostly the mutual use of the other to satisfy needs, sex being one of the few pleasures left. But Joel has no problem taking himself in hand to work out his frustrations.
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
Joel isn’t exactly kinky. There’s not a lot of time or safety in some of the things that he might have liked before Outbreak day. The closest he comes to kinky might be dirty talk. He can spit filthy things in your ear while he’s balls deep and working you both towards bliss.
L = Location (Favorite place to do it)
Anywhere he can get you. He prefers you in a bed made of the softest material and silk sheets. Since he’s never had silk sheets and it’s been nearly twenty years since he’s had a bed that didn’t make his back ache, he will take what he can get. Pressed up against a tree, bent over an old sofa, laid out on blankets, he doesn’t care where he gets to touch you, just as long as he gets to touch you.
M = Motivation (What turns them on or gets them going?)
He’s a simple man with simple needs. It doesn’t take much to get him going when it’s concerning sex. He can think about you, or anything vaguely sexy and he’s ready to go if it’s been awhile. You are his girl and he takes you as you are. There’s nothing exactly soft about your lives now, so there’s no need to try to entice him with sexy lingerie or seduction. Grab his dick and he’s ready to go.
N = No (Something they will not do. Turn offs.)
Hit you. Joel would never be okay with roughing you up during sex. Violence is necessary in the world you live in but sex is not where violence belongs. He’s not opposed to slapping you on the ass but there will never be a time where he does anything beyond that. Don't even contemplate it.
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skills, etc.)
To be honest, there’s not a lot of oral. It’s not that you two aren’t into it, it’s just that hygiene standards aren’t great and it’s easier to fuck rather than perform oral sex. When there is the bathing and time for oral, Joel is actually more of a giver than a taker. He’s going to get his, and he knows how much you enjoy grinding down on his facial hair, you talk about it all the time. So he would rather eat you out and he’s rusty, but dedicated. He won’t complain about his jaw aching or want to quit halfway through, he’s going to finish the job.
P = Pace (Are they fast or rough? Or slow and sensual?)
The pace is normally fast. It’s only rough if you want it to be and it can turn that way when both of you are eager to get off. The steady slap of his hips against yours as he drills his cock into you is like a perfectly ticking watch.
Q = Quickies (Their opinions on quickies rather than regular sex)
Most of the sex you have are quickies. You don’t have much of a choice when you have to work it into when the kid is asleep, you’re in a safe spot and there’s the energy to do it. Oftentimes, it’s a race against the proverbial clock and he doesn’t care if it only takes two minutes, as long as both of you are satisfied by the end of it.
R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)
Life is a risk, sex is a risk. Every time he drops his pants, takes his eyes off watching the surrounding area, he’s taking a risk. There’s not a lot of time or privacy to experiment but there’s always the thrill of getting caught with your pants down by a Clicker.
S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go? How long do they last?)
One and done. Joel isn’t 36 anymore. He’s old, he’s tired. He just wants to nut and then get some sleep. He can last for a good while as long as the pace is steady.
T = Toys (Do they own or use toys on themselves or partners?)
He has twelve toys for you to use. All of them are attached to his body. It’s not like people are really focusing on acquiring sex toys in this world. Otherwise he would be smuggling them in.
U = Unfair (How much do they like to tease?)
Joel doesn’t tease very much. The most that he does is maybe a lingering touch. A squeeze of your hip or a pinch on your ass when he passes by you. But he’s too blunt and down to business to be a tease. Life it too fucking short for that.
V = Volume (How loud are they? What sounds do they make?)
Joel is not loud at all. That low raspy baritone is perfect for growling into your ear as he rocks his hips back and forth. He’s not going to moan loudly or scream. Instead, it’s low words of praise and telling you how good you are. And the grunts, God , are the little grunts of pleasure perfect for turning you into a horny bitch.
W = Wildcard (Random headcanon for your character)
Joel wanted more kids. Before Sarah’s mom took off, Joel had imagined two or three of them running around. Wanting to give Sarah a sibling like he had with Tommy. It wasn’t ideal having Sarah in his early twenties, but he would have liked more. Until the bustup of him and his wife ruined that dream and left Joel a single father. But he doesn’t regret a second of fatherhood at all.
X = X-ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants)
Um, excuse me. This is BDE Joel Miller . This man radiates that energy that only comes when he’s got the equipment to back up the job. While he might not have the sex drive of a man half his age, he packs more than a punch when he gives you the goods. Just barely shy of eight, mouth watering inches, he will fucking have you gagging on him. Not thick like a beer can, but he is girthy enough that your fingertips have to squeeze harshly to touch when they are wrapped around him.
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
He’s not a young man anymore. His sex drive was never that high because of the stress of being a single father. After the world ended, it became a matter of survival for a long time. He’s perfectly fine with once every couple of weeks if that’s what it is. Can he have more sex, sure. But he doesn’t have to have it to survive.
Z = ZZZ (How quickly do they fall asleep afterwards?)
When he’s able to sleep after instead of standing watch? Immediately. It’s some of the best sleep that he gets and is often better than the drug induced sleep he would put himself in with booze and pills when he was back in the QZ. He doesn’t dream of Sarah during this time, just sweet, dreamless sleep that’s even better if he can wrap himself around you. Or have you spoon him.
