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30th of August M.E. 766.
Exactly 2 weeks, 3 days and 9 hours since Noctis Lucis Caelum sacrificed himself for Eos and brought back the dawn for all who made it through the long night.
Up here in the beyond, the King of Light had everything that was rightfully owed to him.
When he took his first few steps into the ocean of blue and purple as a free man, void from duty and destiny, he finally got to see his parents again. Regis and Aulea were the first to embrace him, tell him how much they loved him and how proud they were of everything he had achieved in the limited amount of time he had graced the Eosian surface. Seeing them, tears of joy fell from the young king's eyes and he was so grateful that they would never leave his side again; not unless he wanted them to. He had his family back and nothing could ever take them away from him. He also had Luna here too, his childhood friend who had supported him so much over the years - although the support was done through a secret notebook and a pair of loveable fluffy canines. Noctis would always be in debt to her and her kind heart and loving nature. Here, in the beyond, he finally got the chance to thank her face to face and share a warm embrace he had longed to give her since before the fires blazed across Tenebrae and they were separated by the bloody and bitter war of Lucis and Niflheim.
But here, there was no war.
There was no pain.
There was no bloodshed or sorrowful tears.
Noctis was surrounded by love and happiness; a paradise full of endless joyful possibilities!
It was the afterlife after all. He should expect no less. After all he had done, all he had lost and fought for, he deserved this happiness. Everyone had told him as such. And yet… something was missing. He knew it was. It was the guys.
Gladio, Ignis, Prompto.
Today he should have turned 31 and like the 10 birthdays prior to this one he was spending it without them. He had his dad, his mum, Luna… but he didn’t have the guys. Until it was their time to depart the world below his feet he wouldn’t see them again and hurt so much. However, he didn’t want anyone else to see his hurt. It wasn’t fair on them, not when they were meant to be enjoying an everlasting paradise.
Noctis took himself away from his loved ones. He walked through the endless sea of purples and blues until he was certain no one had followed him. Only then did he wish for a fish pond to appear in front of him and a fishing rod too.
“At least now I can try to take you guys off my mind.” Noctis whispered to himself as he walked along the wooden fishing spot before sitting down at the very edge to throw his lure in.
Being in paradise Noctis was more than aware he could make the fish catch the bait straight away but he didn’t want to. He had always enjoyed the many hours spent by the water’s edge just waiting until the fish came to him. It was so peaceful and calming. That was how he needed to feel on his birthday. Calm and one with his surroundings.
“I dare say how positively evil of you.”
Noctis felt his entire body slump upon hearing that very familiar articulated voice.
Of course, he’d be out here.
“You do realise that fishing dead fish can be very traumatic for them? That is probably how the poor things ended up here and your mind-numbing hobby is destroying the peace they are entitled to.”
Noctis sighed, knowing full well that Ardyn had taken a seat next to him on the wooden fishing pier and gave his ‘guest’ a brief side glance.
“Mind-numbing, huh? If it is that boring, why are you here?”
“Oh, I’ve simply come to inform you how disrespectful you are being, dear Noct.”
“When don’t you.”
A small smile graced the young king’s lips when the man who he once considered his enemy let out a small chuckle. Sure, Ardyn may have ruined his life, taken everything he had ever loved away from him just so he could get his revenge on a deceased family member that Noctis barely gave two thoughts of during his life, but he got it.
He thought he understood it too well.
They were both dealt incredibly shitty hands by the Astrals. Both their lives were ripped apart and they were both given a destiny that they never asked for.
They were one in the same really.
For that reason, Noctis didn’t want to hold grudges nor did he want to fight. He actually found himself enjoying the former Chancellor’s company whenever the man came to find him. And now that he thought about it Ardyn had been popping up a lot recently…
“Kinda surprised you aren’t spending the afterlife with Aera.” Noctis said as he turned to face the former Chancellor, preventing the atmosphere from turning silent. “That is her name, right?”
“That it is.” Ardyn nodded, leaning back on his hands as he looked up at the serene sky. “She doesn’t want to spend it with me though.”
“Oh…” Noctis cringed, feeling his cheeks turn red with embarrassment. “... I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologise.” Ardyn waved him off, supporting a sombre smile as he glanced up to the night sky, full of stars that had formed above their heads. “I am not the same person as I was 2000 years ago. I’m not her Ardyn anymore and that’s alright…”
“I am glad you are taking it so well.” Noctis commented, glancing at the water to see his reflection, noticing how tired he looked.
“What else can I do? I can’t force her to want to spend time with me. All I can do is accept her wishes but enough on her. It’s your birthday, I am much more curious to know why you are spending it alone.”
The grip he held on his fishing rod became tighter as did the muscles that surrounded his non-beating heart. Oh, why did Ardyn have to remind him of it? Why did he have to remind him of the sorrow he felt? No! He wasn’t going to think about it. He came here to forget after all.
With a simple shrug of his shoulders, Noctis replied. “I don’t know…”
“That is a bald-faced lie if I have ever heard one.” Ardyn remarked, shoving his shoulder against Noctis’s almost making the king drop his fishing rod into the pond. “Tell me!”
“It doesn’t matter.” Noctis bit back, shaking his head, only slightly annoyed by his childish behaviour.
“It does. It isn’t exactly paradise if you can’t bring yourself to enjoy your own birthday.”
“Who says I am not enjoying it?” He asked, narrowing his eyes at the man.
“You did.” Ardyn said with a confident nod.
“No, I didn’t.” Noctis sneered, ready to whack Ardyn over the head with his rod. “Now, get lost!”
“You did.” Ardyn said, remaining persistent in his conviction.
“No, I didn’t-”
“Well not you exactly but your eyes did. They are a lot of sorrow within them.”
Noctis immediately tore his gaze away from Ardyn and back down into the pond below to look upon his reflection once more. Sure enough… Ardyn was right. His midnight blue eyes didn’t have a flicker of light in them. They seemed clouded and lost and… broken. He supposed he had always felt broken ever since the day Insomnia fell. Nothing had been able to fix his aching heart ever since that day. Not seeing his parents. Not spending time with Luna. Nothing. He was missing some-
He lost his train of thought when he felt something warm cover the top of his hand.
Noctis looked down to the space between himself and Ardyn to see that the man in question had placed his hand over his own.
He felt confused. He wanted to pull away, yell at Ardyn and demand he tell him what the hell he thought he was doing. But he couldn’t shake off this feeling. A new feeling. A feeling he had never felt in the crazy old Chancellor’s presence before.
“It’s alright.” Ardyn whispered in a compassionate tone. “I understand how you feel.”
“Huh?”
That was all Noctis could bring himself to say as he looked into Ardyn’s eyes that no longer had that golden hue. He still looked like the Chancellor that had stalked him for months while they were still alive, with his wild hair and goofy hat, but his eyes… They looked so innocent and natural and so blue.
“I had 2000 years of loneliness. 2000 years were no one understood how I was feeling. That was until I met you. We are both victims and byproducts of a cruel fate. We both long to be with the ones we care about but can’t. I understand, Noct. You don’t have to pretend around me. It’s alright to feel sad, even in a paradise as glorious as this one.”
Noctis blinked, a little taken back at how vulnerable Ardyn was being with him. He never thought he’d see him like this, especially when he compared this version of the Chancellor to the one that tried to kill him and hurt his friends. But perhaps that Ardyn was never the person he was meant to be. Maybe, this Ardyn, the one so vulnerable and open, was who he really was.
“You’re sad too…” Noctis whispered, feeling his heart ache when he felt Ardyn’s grip on his hand become a little tighter.
Ardyn nodded. “Sad. Lost. Lonely… I’ve felt like that for a long while.”
A very small smile tugged at the corner of the king’s lips as he slightly moved the position of his hand, which was trapped under the Chancellor’s so that their fingers were now intertwined. Was it a little weird he was holding Ardyn Izunia’s hand? Yeah, but it didn’t feel that way. It felt good. It felt right.
Perhaps this was what he was missing all along?
Someone who understood him.
He could tell just by the expression on Ardyn’s face as it flushed pink by his advancement that was what Ardyn had been missing for all these long years.
Perhaps now that didn’t have to be the case.
Maybe they could help each other.
