Chapter Text
In the dark room, the only light source comes from the full moon bypassing the windows. Shadows hide in the darkest corners, almost like if given a chance, it would swallow my owner, Toya, with it if not for the moon protecting him. I took my eyes away from it as I hugged his shivering and freezing body, wrapping my tiny and orange fur body around his knees. While I never cursed my lack of height because it had made it easier for him to carry me around, I wished for it. In hopes that my action would calm his crying, it only made him quietly cry harder.
With his head tucked in his arms and knees locked together, he sniffles, whispering, “I hate this.”
I tragically stare at the purple marks forming on his arms.
It’s okay. I’m here for you.
Finally, Toya holds his head up, even if barely. I step back to the sight of his red-rimmed eyes and tears still streaming down. Soon, he pats me.
He smiles brokenly, staring into my black plastic eyes, “You’re the only one, Aki.”
I let go of his knee to clasp his hand sitting on my head.
Standing with my back tall, I can only assure him, Tomorrow will be better.
He shakes his head sadly; he is no longer crying or shaking; his eyes shift from me to the violin case on his desk. I quickly glance at it before gazing back at my owner’s hazy gray eyes. Something flashes in it before he swiftly closes them, not allowing me to guess what was behind it.
A close call comes from when Toya was heading downstairs to grab us food. Standing near the wall, close to the kitchen and dining room, Toya and I both overheard how his father wanted to get rid of me. His mom was against it, considering how much Toya liked it. His father kept repeating a weird comment, “He’s always talking to that —----!”
A heavy sigh comes from his mom.
Toya hugs me closely as he silently rushes back upstairs to his room.
What about food? Aren’t you hungry?
He says with a strained voice, barely audible, “It’s fine.”
Since then, Toya has tried carrying me around rather than leaving me in his room. Strangely with that, I also slowly start to fade every time around the night. While it didn’t seem like Toya noticed, I hoped it wasn’t anything significant.
From outside, cherry blossoms fell to the ground, and spring was nearing its departure. On this day, I had left Aki’s home. I only realized it when it was during my lunch break, trying to search for it in my bag. I trembled.
No- I put him in his regular hiding spot. I’m sure it’ll be fine.
Taking deep breaths, I put my bag away and ate my food with a heavy heart. I struggled with writing my notes in class for the rest of the day.
Once I finally got out of school, I paced back home.
Rushing to my room, I carelessly throw my bag on the floor. Reaching into the bottom drawer of my desk and taking my textbooks out, I glance at the corner of it, crestfallen.
“I messed up.”
Uncontrollable tears leak out from my eyes.
“This is bad-”
My breaths get stuck behind my throat, drowned with despair, and all I can do is squeeze my eyes, hoping against the worst outcome.
When father gets home, and I ask about it, he answers coldly, “I threw it away.”
A screaming match ensues; I only care about what I’ve lost.
That day, I hid my violin case away in my closet, leaving dust to gather on it.
With every action I take, my guilt chains me for not being able to find Aki, for making the slight mistake of leaving him behind, for not being better. Even though I had tried to reach out, there would always be silence. I seem to take his simple, quiet reassurances, for I have taken for granted, don’t come back. And with it gone, it was difficult not to think about everything wrong.
The nightmares that follow from that day are Aki showing up in my room, demanding to know why I left him, why I had let my father throw him away. Countless times, I attempted to explain to dream Aki that it wasn’t on purpose, that I didn’t mean for it to happen, and that I wanted to fix it. Even so, Aki doesn’t listen to my pleas, and it would always ends the same- something magically surrounds my neck, making me unable to breathe and Aki leaving me.
These days repeat, blurring what normalcy I had.
Ironically, it was also nearing the end of spring when I found him too.
Wandering around the different streets at night had started to be a thing I regularly did. Being at home was too oppressive and all over the place reminded me of bad memories. Today, I decided to wander around Vivid Street and observe the street performers. While it wasn’t music I was used to listening to, I couldn’t help falling for how freeing it sounded.
By chance, the person who caught my eye the most was him, ginger-haired with ambitious green eyes and a strong stage presence. Already, a large crowd had been forming around him. I was glancing at the few people, who must have been regular, who cheered his name.
Akito.
It was then he caught my interest. Was it a second chance- Vaguely, I registered something else trapping me, but instead of guilt, it was longing-
From then, Akito became —.