Chapter Text
Tooru
Saturday 9:37 PM
Iwaizumi: Oi, Shittykawa
Iwaizumi: Did you take my hw packet
Oikawa: iwa-chan????
Iwaizumi: Yes? Who tf else would it be
Iwaizumi: Did you actually fucking delete
my number
Oikawa: wahh do you think so little of me,
iwa-chan?? (இ﹏இ`｡)
Oikawa: ik we haven’t talked in a longgg
while but you’re still my bestest
friend forever ღゝ◡╹)ノ♡
Iwaizumi: We just walked home together
wtf do you mean
Iwaizumi: Look do you have my hw packet
or not? If you don’t can you at
least send pictures
Oikawa: awww iwa-chan dreams of me!!!!
Oikawa: i miss walking home w you too
(ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ
Oikawa: remember in middle school when
we’d race each other home? ahh
those were the days （´・｀ ）♡
Iwaizumi: You know what I’m just gonna
come over
Oikawa: ehhhhhhh??!?!??!?
Oikawa: rn??!?!?!?!?!????
Oikawa: it’s late/?!!?!??!??!
Iwaizumi: It’s not that late
Oikawa: yes it is!!!!!
Oikawa: you can’t just come over!!!!!!!!
Oikawa: what would your parents
say!!!!!!!!!!!!
Iwaizumi: They won’t care?
Oikawa: wtf
Oikawa: ofc they would??????
Oikawa: no you’re not allowed to come
over
Oikawa: what if you get mugged!!!!!!
Iwaizumi: Wtf why would I get mugged
Oikawa: it’s late!!!!
Oikawa: and it’s a long distance!!
Oikawa: well i guess it’s not thaaaaat far
Oikawa: but you still have to take the bus
and stuff
Oikawa: are the buses even running this
late
Iwaizumi: What the fuck are you on
Iwaizumi: I’m not taking the bus? I’m
walking
Oikawa: WALKING??????
Oikawa: IWA-CHAN YOU CAN’T WALK
ACROSS THE CITY WTF
Iwaizumi: Why would I walk across the
city? You live down the street
Oikawa: what
Oikawa: oh
Oikawa: did my mom tell you i’m home
for the weekend??
Oikawa: ahhh sorry iwa-chan, i’m staying
at the dorms instead.. (⋟﹏⋞)
Iwaizumi: Dorms?
Oikawa: yeah i usually go home every
third weekend
Oikawa: but coach washijou’s making us
practice this weekend too bc of
the interhigh next week
｡･ﾟ(ﾟ><ﾟ)ﾟ･｡
Iwaizumi: Coach Washijou? The
Shiratorizawa coach?
Oikawa: yeah he’s rlly scary (((＞＜)))
Oikawa: you would think after three years
it would get better but he’s still a
fucking demon
Iwaizumi: What are you even talking
about? You’re not making
any fucking sense.
Iwaizumi: Whatever I’m coming over
Oikawa: NO YOU CANT!!!!!
Oikawa: IWAIZUMI HAJIME ARE YOU
FUCKING CRAZY YOU CANT
WALK TO SHIRATORIZAWA
Iwaizumi: What?
Oikawa: look i
Oikawa: i get it, i rlly do
Oikawa: i miss you a lot too
Oikawa: and i’m not sure what made you
text me tonight but i’m rlly glad
you did bc well um
Oikawa: idk? we haven’t talked since our
first interhigh
Oikawa: and i miss you. a lot
Iwaizumi: What
Oikawa: i pour my heart out to you and
that’s all you have to say???????
??
Oikawa: wow i take it back! i don’t miss
you, iwa-chan!!!! (#｀皿´)
Iwaizumi: No I’m genuinely confused
Iwaizumi: Are you OK? Did you hit your
head?
Oikawa: yeah yk what i don’t wanna talk
to you anymore
Oikawa: still!! don’t come here, it’s late
and it’s dangerous
Oikawa: if you get mugged, you’re gonna
end up in the hospital, and then i
won’t be able to play against you
during the interhigh!!
Iwaizumi: I’m not planning on getting
myself hospitalized before the
interhigh
Iwaizumi: But seriously are you OK?
Iwaizumi: What do you mean play against
me? We’re on the same team
Oikawa: no???
Oikawa: oh no
Oikawa: did YOU hit your head???????
??
Oikawa: do i need to call 119???????
Iwaizumi: Oikawa, this isn’t funny
Oikawa: i’m not trying to be!!!!!
Oikawa: my best friend seems to have
suffered memory loss
Oikawa: ofc i’m worried and scared!!!!!!!!!
Iwaizumi: Me? You’re the one who thinks
we’re on different teams
Oikawa: iwa-chan
Oikawa: what school do i go to
Iwaizumi: Seijoh
Oikawa: i’m calling 119
Iwaizumi: I’m coming over
Oikawa: NO STAY THERE I’M CALLING
YOU DON’T YOU DARE
FUCKING MOVE HAJIME
Saturday 10:13 PM
Iwaizumi: OK, who the hell are you and
how the fuck did you get
Oikawa’s number
Oikawa: i told you!!!
Oikawa: i AM oikawa tooru
Iwaizumi: Bullshit. I talked to Oikawa just
now in person. He said he hasn’t
sent any messages
Iwaizumi: Tell me how you got his number
or I’m reporting you to the police
Oikawa: i didn’t get it from anywhere!!!!!
Oikawa: bc i’m oikawa!!!!!!
Oikawa: if anything i should ask YOU how
you got iwaizumi’s number
Iwaizumi: That’s because I am Iwaizumi
Oikawa: ok then prove it
Iwaizumi: The fuck?
Oikawa: prove you’re iwaizumi!!
Iwaizumi: I don’t need to prove you
anything
Iwaizumi: Now tell me how you fucking got
Oikawa’s number
Oikawa: I TOLD YOU IM OIKAWA
Oikawa: this is stupid
Iwaizumi: This is a waste of time. I’m
reporting you
Oikawa: in first grade you chased me
around with a cicada during
recess until i cried and that’s
how we became friends
Iwaizumi: What the fuck
Oikawa: when my mom accidentally
washed off blanco’s autograph
you came over and helped me
look at his signed stuff online
Oikawa: you told me you’d get me his
autograph for my birthday
Oikawa: you got me my first volleyball
instead
Oikawa: i still have it, it’s sitting on my
bookshelf, next to the godzilla
toy you gave me
Oikawa: the one you got me for my
birthday the year before, bc you
wanted to convince me godzilla
was the “best monster movie
made in the history of movies”
Oikawa: then for the birthday after that
you took me to watch fucking
godzilla since there was a
special screening in theaters
Oikawa: i hated every second of it and
you knew bc you laughed at me
as soon as we got out
Oikawa: your mom took us out for ice
cream afterwards as an apology
bc she didn’t know i hated
godzilla
Oikawa: bc you told her it was also my
favorite movie in the whole wide
world
Oikawa: iwa-chan...?
Iwaizumi: I’m here
Oikawa: are you still going to report me..?
Iwaizumi: I don’t know
Oikawa: oh
Oikawa: well i would appreciate it if you
didn’t
Iwaizumi: Of course you would
Iwaizumi: I won’t report you for now
Oikawa: thanks
Oikawa: um so
Oikawa: did you get your hw packet?
Iwaizumi: Yeah
Oikawa: that’s good
Iwaizumi: Yeah
Oikawa: well!! this is a strange night!!!!
Oikawa: i think i might go to sleep!!!!!!!
Oikawa: gn iwa-chan!!!!!!!!
Iwaizumi: Oikawa
Oikawa: yeah?
Iwaizumi: Sorry
Oikawa: huh?
Oikawa: what for?
Iwaizumi: For texting you, I guess? I don’t
know
Iwaizumi: I don’t know if I even believe in
any of this. It’s... crazy.
Something straight out of your
sci-fi films
Oikawa: !!!! oh ym god iwa-chan
Oikawa: do you think this is some sort of
like
Iwaizumi: Alien shit?
Oikawa: yeah!!!!
Iwaizumi: Fuck do I know
Iwaizumi: Nothing makes sense
Iwaizumi: Why tf would you be at
Shiratorizawa?
Oikawa: i mean i get why i would go to
seijoh
Oikawa: but why wouldn’t i be at
shiratorizawa?
Iwaizumi: You hate Shiratorizawa,
especially Ushiwaka. His mere
existence aggravates you to no
end. Not to mention he keeps
telling you that you should’ve
come to Shiratorizawa, and
that pisses you off more
than Kageyama
Oikawa: i wouldn’t go that far, no one can piss me off more than tobio-chan (´｡• ᵕ •｡`)
Oikawa: but well
Oikawa: you’re not wrong
Oikawa: ushiwaka can rot in hell tbh
Oikawa: not any time soon tho, we still
need to go to nationals
Oikawa: maybe after graduation
(ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
Iwaizumi: You really are a piece of shit
Oikawa: rude, iwa-chan! (҂ `з´ )
Oikawa: aren’t you mad tho?
Iwaizumi: About your crappy personality?
Yeah. I don’t know why I
associate myself with you
Oikawa: (இ﹏இ`｡)
Oikawa: you’re the one with the crappy
personality, iwa-chan~~
Oikawa: but no, that’s not what i meant
Oikawa: assuming this is all real
Oikawa: aren’t you mad i went with
shiratorizawa?
Iwaizumi: Not really. It’s not like you
actually went
Oikawa: but i did!!!!!
Oikawa: i’m currently going to
shiratorizawa
Oikawa: semi-chan is sleeping above me
rn!!!!!!
Iwaizumi: The third-year setter?
Oikawa: the ~back-up~ third-year setter
Oikawa: i’m the starting setter (๑˘︶˘๑)
Iwaizumi: Of course you are
Oikawa: i’m serious!!!!!! ヽ(*｀ﾟД´)ﾉ
Oikawa: here i’ll send a pic as proof!!
Oikawa:
Oikawa: i took this earlier this week, aren’t they cute~ (⭑￫ 𓎟 ￩ ⭑)
Oikawa: well taichi, shirabu-chan,
tendou-chan, reon-chan and
shikki are cute
Oikawa: ushiwaka looks like a turd (´～ヾ )
Iwaizumi: I would say you snuck onto
Shiratorizawa grounds to take
that, but you’re not the type
Oikawa: you rlly think i’d sneak in???
!!(⊃ Д)⊃≡ﾟ ﾟ
Oikawa: well i didn’t!!!
Oikawa: not that i would’ve needed to
anyway since i go here (⁎˃ᆺ˂)
Iwaizumi: Alright, alright. I believe you
Iwaizumi: So you actually go to
Shiratorizawa?
Oikawa: yes!!!! (-`д´-)
Oikawa: is it rlly that hard to believe
<(｀^´)>
Iwaizumi: Yeah, actually. Like I said, you
hate Shiratorizawa
Iwaizumi: You’d probably give up volleyball
before going to Shiratorizawa
Oikawa: i would die before giving up
volleyball
Oikawa: well i do
Oikawa: go to shiratorizawa
Iwaizumi: Why?
Oikawa: mhmm why indeed~ (*´ ˘ `*).｡oO
Oikawa: anyways it looks like there are
two of us
Oikawa: there’s a me that goes to seijoh
Oikawa: then there’s me, who goes to
shiratorizawa
Oikawa: and there’s a you that still talks
to me
Oikawa: and a you that doesn’t
Iwaizumi: Sorry again
Oikawa: what for?
Iwaizumi: You said you haven’t talked to
me since our first interhigh. I
guess I’m sorry for getting your
hopes up
Iwaizumi: By texting you, I mean
Oikawa: ah
Oikawa: well at the end of the day, i still
got to talk to you
Oikawa: even if it’s not...what i expected?
Oikawa: like honestly? i still think this is
some kind of twisted dream
Iwaizumi: I still think this is a prank.
Though I guess getting my hw
packet from you while I was on
the phone with you doesn’t really
make sense
Oikawa: haha
Oikawa: yeah
Iwaizumi: I’m surprised you’re not
Iwaizumi: Idk geeking out more over the
situation
Oikawa: wdym
Iwaizumi: We talked about how this could
be alien shit
Oikawa: oh right!!!!!!
Oikawa: do you think we were somehow
abducted and they’re running
experiments on us so now we’re
just?? hallucinating???
Oikawa: DO YOU THINK THIS IS A
SIMULATION (°ロ°) !
Iwaizumi: No
Oikawa: booooooo (=｀.´=)
Oikawa: well you can’t prove that it ISN’T
Oikawa: so who knows!!!!
Oikawa: maybe everything we’ve ever
known ISN’T real!!!!!!
Iwaizumi: I just pinched myself and it hurt,
so yeah
Iwaizumi: Not a simulation
Oikawa: what if
Iwaizumi: You can’t feel pain in a
simulation
Oikawa: pain is part of the simulation
Iwaizumi: No
Oikawa: you can’t just reject my idea
before i say it!!!
Oikawa: what happened to the scientific
method?????
Oikawa: you gotta test my hypothesis
before rejecting it!!!
Iwaizumi: We’re not in a simulation
Oikawa: well what is this then (`⌒´メ)
Iwaizumi: Idk some sort of weird shit
Iwaizumi: Maybe alien shit
Iwaizumi: But not a simulation
Oikawa: ( ￣＾￣)
Oikawa: so
Oikawa: you go to seijoh?
Iwaizumi: Yeah
Iwaizumi: I do too right?
Iwaizumi: I mean the other me
Oikawa: yeah
Oikawa: i wonder
Oikawa: if there’s a you that goes to
shiratorizawa
Iwaizumi: Maybe. I mean apparently
there’s a you that does
Oikawa: haha yeah
Oikawa: well i rlly should sleep
Oikawa: morning practice and all
Oikawa: gn, iwa-chan! gl with your hw
packet σ(≧ε≦σ) ♡
Iwaizumi: Thx. Gn
