Chapter Text
Soft moonlight glittered through the window, the curtains having been pushed aside at some point last night. Empty bottles of varying types of booze littered the table and floor, as well as chip bags and other food stuff tossed haphazardly aside during a drunken escapade.
Fenris squinted in annoyance at the window and the bright moon that had woken him, still intoxicated and way too warm to be even remotely comfortable. It took him a long time to realize the source of that heat was the nearly crushing weight of a very much passed-out Garrett Hawke, and the elf wondered if he had perhaps been too harsh on the moon.
Being crushed under a man twice your size was a very real reason to wake up, as it endangered your capacity to breath and as a result live.
Snorting softly, Fenris shoved at the weight of his best friend. Nothing.
Garrett Hawke was a heavy man, not so much in weight, but in muscle. To be fair, he did have a bit of a gut going thanks to his affinity for junk food. And while Fenris was smaller in height and weight entirely, he was by no means weak. But moving Garrett was not going to happen unless fate intervened, and Fenris was far too tired and intoxicated to figure out how to get that to happen.
The elf flopped back down against the soft pillow on the couch, eyeing the light pushing through the window. The curtains off to the side fluttered just slightly, and it occurred to Fenris that the window was open just a bit. Sadly, the tiny breeze didn’t reach him at all, and he was almost ready to give into his fate of perishing in the heat.
So, in desperation, he did the first thing he could think of -and thinking was not a thing he was capable of at the moment. Growling, he smacked Garrett across the head, not hard enough to injure him terribly, but apparently enough to scare the fuck out of the bigger man, who yelped, and somehow ended up falling off of the couch and smacking his already injured head on the table.
“What the FUCK?” he cried out pitifully, laying on the floor.
Fenris blinked in confusion, suddenly free and able to breath. Still sweating in the tiny, hot apartment of his, but able to feel his body and his lungs, and he sighed gratefully. Sluggish with booze, he promptly forgot why he couldn’t breath well in the first place, and climbed off of the couch to open the window more.
The resulting flailing of limbs as the elf stepped and tripped on Garrett was comical, and while he didn’t smack his face on anything hard, Fenris found himself laying on his friend on floor and feeling far too tired to get up again. So he didn’t.
“Fen,” Garrett muttered. “Fen, get up.”
Fenris grunted. When had Garrett learned how to speak gibberish? He shifted slightly in annoyance. It was cooler down on the floor, and the elf wanted to sleep.
“Fenris!”
Garrett’s voice came out in a squeak, but it was loud enough to rouse the dozing elf. Fenris shifted again, not hearing the man yelp more, and looked up at his face blearily. It took him a very long time to make sense of the expression on the bearded face, slowly taking in the scrunched brows and bared teeth. Why was Garrett upset? The man never had a problem with him sleeping on him before. Had he done something bad lately?
“Is this about the other day when I ate your fries?” Fenris mumbled.
“Can you j- what? No, what are you talking a- No, can you just move, please?” the man answered.
“Why? I thought you liked me?” Fenris questioned, beginning to feel distressed.
He was far too tired and drunk to handle this right now. The elf struggled to get up, using the table as leverage, accidentally kneeing his friend even harder between the legs, causing Garrett to cry out in alarm. Thinking the man was just upset that he was leaving, Fenris ignored the sound and made it back onto the couch to curl up against the pillow and sulk. He was quite certain it was the fries.
“Fen...of course I like you, what?” Garrett’s voice was distant as the bigger man sat up and looked up at the elf curled up pathetically.
Slightly less drunk, and having eaten much more than the lanky elf, Garrett managed to piece together the situation a bit more better, and he rolled his eyes towards the ceiling in mild exasperation. He remembered the last time they had ended up passed out drunk and waking to the elf arguing with his dog. That had been at Garrett’s much larger -and cooler- house.
“No, you don’t,” Fenris pouted. “You told me to get off of you.”
“Fen, you were crushing my balls.”
Fenris scrunched his face up in confusion. He was expecting the man to confess that yes, it WAS about the fries, but he just hadn’t wanted to be mean. The elf was not able to make sense of why Garrett was now accusing him of crushing his man bits, but he knew he would not have it. He had finally allowed Garrett to stay at his place for the night, after they had picked up as much booze and junk as they could carry. He remembered vaguely kicking the man’s ass at Smash Bros, but otherwise he could not think of having done or said anything that would make Garrett hate him suddenly.
“Fen…?”
Garrett blinked at the silence. His friend brooding, he was used to, but the elf never ignored him quite blatantly. He looked closer, trying to see Fenris’ face better, and noticed the elf’s green eyes were wet. His jaw dropped in utter confusion, and he was unable to think of what to say. Why was Fenris so sad? Had he said something mean earlier? Surely he was not thinking about the fries still. Shaking his head, Garrett Hawke got unsteadily to his feet and flopped onto the couch, scooting under Fenris’ legs and holding them in his lap. He stroked the bare leg where the elf’s pants had ridden up slightly and hummed quietly.
“Why are you being nice now? You told me to get off,” Fenris grumbled crossly.
“You were crushing my BALLS, Fen.”
“No, I wasn’t. Why would you say something so mean?”
“....Fenris, you were literally crushing my man parts. You FELL on my man parts,” Garrett sighed and scrambled up the couch until he was behind Fenris, holding the smaller man against him, back to chest.
“What? Why would I do that?” the elf sounded so incredibly hurt and confused that Garrett almost felt bad.
“It was an accident, I hope.”
Fenris harrumphed loudly as he felt his friend stroking his hip and snuffling against his hair. The man reminded him of a dog sometimes. Garrett was certainly heavy enough to resemble his own dog, a giant of a beast with a comically stubby tail, and the elf found himself laughing thinking of Garrett running around with his butt wiggling and his tongue lolling out.
“Wha-why are you laughing? That’s not funny, Fenris!”
Garrett could no longer understand what was going on, but as long as his friend was not upset anymore, he would take it. He squeezed the slighter man closer and nuzzled against his neck, tangling his legs with the elf’s contentedly. For his part, Fenris felt his distress bleed out and he burrowed against Garrett, completely forgetting the entire ordeal in favor of finally going back to sleep. Before he passed out entirely, the elf murmured one last thing:
“Hawke, stop wiggling your butt. It looks stupid.”
To which Garrett just blinked, already dozing off as well. He had no clue what Fenris was talking about, but he agreed anyway. He just wanted to sleep now, even if his balls did still sting from the unintended abuse from earlier.
--
The next morning, Fenris yawned and stood up, groggily stumbling to the window to open it and let in more of the heavenly breeze. He blinked in the sunlight, turning away from it as his head ached in response, and looked at the sleeping man on the couch.
Smiling, completely forgetting last night, Fenris wandered back to the couch and crawled back into Garrett’s arms, this time facing him and nuzzling against him with a soft sound of content.
It was going to be a good day, hangover be damned.
End.