Chapter Text
Peter and MJ had been friends since they were kids, and even back then, MJ had been the bigger out of the two. Even without the genetics factor, his parents, especially his father had done a lot to ensure that he’d grow up to be strong, and obviously, his father’s vision of a strong man was someone who was tall and lean (“None of that ridiculous bulging out of the shirt nonsense Maadhav, those are all superficial.” MJ was tempted to point out how his father's views on strength were pretty superficial too.).
So, growing up, MJ had been the big kid. He remembers being freakishly tall in elementary school, standing next to Peter Parker, who was small and skinny, towering over him, and it gave MJ an overwhelming urge to protect Peter. Where his father had obsessively trained him to be physically strong, his mother had taught him to be a good person, to keep everyone safe, especially people who looked up to him, and well, Peter certainly looked up to him. Not just in the physical sense, but it seemed like this kid valued his opinion, unlike the others in their class. And despite his appearance, Peter didn’t assume him to be scary, or a bully, which is what some of the other kids thought of him, just because he was much, much bigger than the average elementary school kid.
Naturally, Peter and MJ became best friends. During school, they sat together, and whenever one of their classmates decided to pick on Peter (because Peter was the easy target), MJ would jump to his defense. When it came time to disperse from school, they would head to Peter’s house because MJ’s parents were often working till really late. That isn’t to say they never went to MJ’s. His mother insisted that Peter come over and spend time with them whenever they were home because she couldn’t bear the possibility of Peter’s uncle and aunt thinking she didn’t care about her son and his friends. Either way, when school was done for the day, they would catch the bus to Peter’s or MJ’s depending on the day, and would spend all evening together. Peter would pull him to the dining table, and together they’d sit and do their homework, occasionally distracting each other by kicking each other’s feet or poking each other with their erasers, and once that was done, they’d go to play. Some days they would play out in the yard, running around pretending to be pirates, or knights, and some days they would stay inside and just watch TV, or dance around to silly music.
MJ was the kind of person who showed his love through touch. He liked holding hands with his mother and hugging her when he sensed her sadness, and eventually that extended to Peter.
They always held hands. And when Peter was upset, MJ would hug him close and let him talk, or cry. Once, MJ hugged Peter and out of some weird urge, had picked him up and spun him around, which had made Peter laugh, so MJ decided he’d do it whenever he could, just to hear that laugh. Sometimes they’d fall asleep in front of the TV and MJ would unconsciously hug Peter close, and that’s how Aunt May or his mother would find them. It was adorable when they were children.
Things changed when they started going to middle school.
They were still best friends, they still spent most of their time together, but MJ stopped being so touchy. He knew his father didn’t approve every time he saw him and Peter holding hands, from the way his expression would sour. There were nights when dinner would end with his father yelling at him about how MJ didn’t need to be so physically affectionate, especially with Peter, and his mother would squeeze his hand sympathetically before eventually siding with his father, because she was his wife, because she’d been raised to always agree with her husband. At first, he didn't understand what the big deal was and it would take him a while to figure out why his father didn't like his friendship with Peter, or just, Peter in general.
MJ, as much as he didn't like his father, couldn't stand the thought of being a disappointment, so he stopped. He stopped holding hands with Peter, stopped the casual touches, stopped hugging him close whenever he needed comfort, opting for a pat on the back instead. He could tell it confused Peter, upset him even, to see MJ so visibly pull away from him and put a physical distance between them.
He tried to make up for it, by making sure he was always present in Peter's life. He didn't need to always hug Peter and hold his hands to be his friend. They could be friends without all the physical affection.
Eventually, they settled into their new normal, they would hang out after school when they weren't too busy with assignments or exams, and the only time they were in physical contact was when they would shove at each other for fun, or pat each other's backs. Peter might have been upset about the lack of hand-holding and hugs before but he was totally fine now. They were fine.
MJ wasn't.
Because somewhere along the line he'd realized what his father had seen in him that he himself hadn't seen. His father, of all people, had picked up on his want and need to be in close proximity with Peter more than the other kids he'd eventually made friends with. Just Peter. He thought back to all those times his dad had yelled at him for being so affectionate with his friends and remembered how Peter was the only one that had been brought up.
Of course his father had to be the one who noticed how even though MJ was always physically affectionate with friends, he held Peter a few seconds longer than he held anyone else. Tapped his fingers against Peter's arms and shoulders to reassure himself of Peter's presence. He didn't do that with anyone else. Not even his mom. And he missed it. He missed all those times he'd held hands with Peter, how he'd rub his thumbs over MJ's knuckles and smile at him. Missed how Peter would laugh and kick his legs out in excitement as MJ picked him up by the waist.
God he missed that laugh. Peter didn't laugh like he used to.
So, the night before their first day in high school, as his friends were excitedly texting each other about how they'd reinvent themselves, as Peter texted him goodnight, MJ sat in his dark bedroom, thinking about all the things that had changed and would continue to change, because he'd learnt something new about himself.
Maadhav Jai Kumar was in love with Peter Parker.