Chapter Text
Gradually Sapnap notices that something is wrong. Patches of black mold begin to grow upon his restroom’s ceiling, grime collects under his sink, and fungi starts to spread outward from cracks in the floor. When Sapnap requests a maintenance worker to investigate the problems, they discover that water has penetrated the walls of Sapnap's one-room studio apartment.
Worried that the moldy walls, rotting insulation, and fungal spores could be health hazards, Sapnap asks the maintenance worker what he should do. Although the apartment complex’s landlord must pay for the repairs, Sapnap will still be unable to live in the studio apartment for two weeks while maintenance workers fix the pipes and remove the mold.
Hoping to live somewhere else temporarily, Sapnap seeks help from his friend George. Unfortunately George's one-room studio apartment is even smaller than Sapnap's place, so he cannot offer shelter for him. Instead, George promises to search for alternatives.
Without any other option, Sapnap resigns himself to wait.
Thirty minutes later, much sooner than expected, George calls back.
As Sapnap's ringtone echoes through the studio apartment’s stuffy air, he hurries from the kitchen to grab his vibrating smartphone. From inside its wire cage, his guinea pig Pork Loin squeaks with curiosity.
Flopping onto his miniature couch beside one wall of the apartment, Sapnap answers the call. “Hello?”
“Hey, Sapnap!” George's voice is no longer uncertain. Now it is triumphant as he boasts, “I actually found someone. One of my friends has a house in Orlando, only two hours away from you. He says he would be happy to let you stay at his place!”
“For the whole two weeks?” Sapnap is astonished. Relief nearly overwhelms him. “Who’s your buddy?”
“His name is Dream,” George explains. “I’ve known him for years! He’s super cool, and he’s got a big house, so don’t worry about taking up too much space.”
“What, is he, like, rich or something?”
“He’s got money, I’ll tell you that.” Brimming with pride, George describes, “He’s one of those rare rich people who are legitimately cool.” Sapnap hears typing on a keyboard until the other man offers, “Here, I’ll send you Dream’s phone number so you can arrange the details with him.”
“I’m excited to meet the guy.” As Sapnap receives George's message in his inbox, he cannot believe his luck! Hoping to express his appreciation, he adds, “Thanks for your help, man. I really -”
“Wait!” George blurts, then he apologizes hastily for interrupting. “I’m sorry, just… there’s something else I forgot to tell you. You should probably warn Dream that you’ve got a guinea pig. As far as I’m aware, he doesn’t like rodents, but I’m sure he’ll be willing to accommodate yours, especially since you only have one.”
“Okay, thanks for letting me know.” Opening his smartphone’s messaging application, Sapnap agrees, “I’ll tell him.”
When Sapnap and George say their goodbyes and hang up, Sapnap is overjoyed. Unable to keep the news to himself, he turns to his guinea pig in its cage. “Did you hear all of that, Pork Loin? We’re going to have a new home for a little while!”
Pork Loin’s pink nose twitches. It stares at its owner with beady black eyes, then it scampers across its soft bedding to chew on a sprig of hay.
“Yeah, I’m excited, too.” Returning his attention to his smartphone, Sapnap sends his first message to Dream’s phone number.
Sapnap: Hello Dream, this is Sapnap! I’m George's friend
The other man responds immediately.
Dream: nice to meet u! Like i told Sap, i’ve got a spare bedroom and plenty of space
Grateful for his host’s generosity, Sapnap asks hopefully, Is it alright if I move in tomorrow?
Dream: yeah sure no worries. you’ll be very welcome! :)
With Dream’s approval, Sapnap drafts an internal list of everything that he must bring in his car to Dream’s house. He does not want to do more than one trip, so he must pack efficiently. Then, through the buzz of plans in his mind, he remembers George's advice from the end of their call. Hurrying back to the couch, he lifts his smartphone again and sends a question.
Sapnap: Oh also! Is it okay if I bring a pet with me?
As George predicted, Dream’s laid-back demeanor shifts into wariness.
Dream: um,,, can i ask what kind of pet?
Hoping that his response will not cause Dream to rescind his offer, Sapnap types his answer carefully.
Sapnap: I have a guinea pig but he’s super chill
Dream: … in a cage? (i hope???)
Sapnap: Yeah don’t worry, he doesn’t bite or make noise
The other man’s previous responses were immediate, but this time, his next text arrives after a palpable pause.
Dream: ok I think that’s fine. we’ll find a safe spot for it
When Dream seals the deal by sending his address, Sapnap exhales an audible groan of relief. Placing his smartphone down upon the couch cushion beside him, he rubs his face with his palms. Hauling himself off the couch, he stretches. Around him, the studio apartment is silent except for the echo of its owner’s footsteps and the faint dripping of water in the walls.
Sapnap spends the rest of the night packing for tomorrow. I guess I needed a vacation at some point, he muses to himself. He only hopes that his host Dream will be as friendly as he seems.
***
The journey to Orlando, Florida, requires almost three hours of driving. Sapnap encounters city streets, freeway traffic, and plenty of humidity as he crosses the Floridian landscape. Thirty minutes before his scheduled arrival at Dream’s house, the host texts him an invitation to lunch.
Sapnap: Are you sure it’ll be okay if I leave my stuff in the car while we’re inside?
Dream: yeah u should be fine. the restaurant has a parking lot and outdoor seating, so we can sit at a table beside ur car
Following Dream’s advice, Sapnap chooses a parking space directly beside the restaurant’s outdoor seating section. Before leaving, he turns on the air conditioning inside the car so his guinea pig Pork Loin will not overheat.
“Alright, buddy, I’m going to eat with a friend now,” Sapnap whispers to his confused pet. Gently pressing one finger against the wire cage, he blows a small kiss to the guinea pig before exiting the car and locking the doors.
When Sapnap hops onto the concrete curb and skirts the restaurant’s corner, he realizes that he has no idea what Dream looks like. He never thought to ask George for a physical description!
As luck would have it, the restaurant is full of people. Sapnap enters the front doors to witness dim lighting, crowded tables, and busy wait staff. A short line lingers near the register as customers wait for a table.
Barely able to hear his own thoughts over the chatter around him, Sapnap sees multiple single men who are around his age. Dream could be that rude guy who is asking the wait staff member for a refill, he could be that bearded guy drinking alone at the bar, he could be that guy who is talking on his phone in the dining area’s back corner, or he could even be that super-attractive guy who is walking toward Sapnap right now -
“Hey, are you Sapnap?” Oh god. He is, indeed, the super-attractive guy who is walking toward Sapnap right now. Slowing to a halt, he looks down at the other man and gestures to his outfit. “Thanks for being easy to identify. George told me you like to wear blue denim jackets even when it’s hot outside.”
“That’s right.” Subconsciously Sapnap pulls on the hems of his blue denim jacket. Keeping his composure despite the surprise of being recognized so quickly, he asks “You must be Dream?”
“I am.” Dream tilts his head with a pleased smile. “I just ordered a table outside for us.”
As those words leave Dream’s mouth, a wait staff member calls the men’s attention from a pair of glass doors that lead to the restaurant’s outdoor seating section. To Sapnap's relief, Dream kept his promise to request a table under an overhang directly beside the parking lot. When the wait staff member seats the pair, they murmur quick thank-yous and sit on opposite sides of a small round table. Midday sunlight streams from an angle overhead, illuminating Sapnap's left shoulder and Dream’s right side.
“Thanks for inviting me out for lunch.” Glancing up from his menu, Sapnap explains, “I didn’t realize how hungry I would be after the drive. It’s weird because I was just sitting in my car, doing nothing but pressing the foot pedals and turning the wheel.”
“Maybe it was the stress that tired you out,” Dream suggests. Trailing his index finger down one side of his own menu until he decides on an item, he explains, “Even if you think you’re doing nothing, you burn energy just by sitting and thinking.”
From here, Sapnap and Dream dive into a friendly conversation. While Dream describes Orlando’s collection of amusement parks, zoos, and museums, the other man listens politely. In return, Dream listens with avid interest when Sapnap tells stories about his studio apartment and his journey to Orlando.
After both men order their food, they barely notice the amount of time that passes until they receive their meals. Once they thank their wait staff member, Sapnap takes the opportunity to change the subject back to his scheduled two weeks with Dream.
“Thanks for letting me move in on such short notice, especially since I brought a guinea pig. George mentioned that you don’t like rodents.” Although Sapnap is unaccustomed to conveying appreciation so much, he does not want to seem like he is taking advantage of Dream’s kindness.
Not looking up from his garlic bread and salad, Dream dismisses him. “As long as the guinea pig stays in the cage, it won’t be a problem at all! The real trick will be to make sure that Jonathan doesn’t find out about it.”
The unexpected mention of a new name startles Sapnap. “Who’s Jonathan?”
“George didn’t tell you about him?” A warm smile spreads slowly across Dream’s face as he glances up from his food. Self-consciously he taps his fork against the edge of his salad bowl. “He lives with me. He’s very special to me.”
“I didn’t know you lived with someone,” Sapnap remarks with surprise. George never mentioned that Dream was taken! However, Sapnap realizes he probably should have guessed that such a friendly, handsome man would have a partner already. He wonders whether he feels jealous of Dream… or jealous of Dream’s partner.
The other man’s teal eyes glow with fondness as he nods, “Oh yes, Jonathan is my whole world, pretty much. He’s lived with me for years, and I’m grateful for him every day.”
“Wow, that’s amazing.” Gritting his teeth, Sapnap does not want to wonder why he feels afraid to ask if Dream and Jonathan are partners.
After both men finish their meals, Sapnap offers to handle the bill. However, Dream insists on paying for everything, including the tip, before they leave the table. When they are ready to go, Sapnap stands up and follows Dream so they can leave the restaurant together. He expects that the host will simply offer to meet him at the house, but instead the other man follows Sapnap to his car.
“It looks like you shoved your entire apartment into there!” Dream gapes at the pile of belongings that occupy the car’s passenger seat, back seats, and trunk.
“I didn’t want to make more than one trip from my apartment to your house,” Sapnap explains, using one hand to shield his eyes from the sunlight above. Pointing at his guinea pig’s wire cage, he adds, “That’s my little buddy Pork Loin.”
“Pork Loin?” Dream raises an eyebrow.
“Because he’s a guinea pig.”
“Ah,” the other man nods with understanding, then he shoves both hands into his jean pockets. He appears relieved to see that the guinea pig is still in its cage, then he clicks his tongue. “Well, then, I guess I’ll see you in a few minutes?”
“Yeah, I’ll meet you at the house.”
“Epic.” Taking his cue to leave, Dream turns, waves over his shoulder, and walks away.
Sapnap watches his host disappear around the restaurant’s corner, then he sighs. When he lifts his smartphone to check the time, he is shocked to see that almost two hours have passed.
As he completes his journey, Sapnap discovers that Dream’s house is located close to the restaurant where they ate lunch. He lives in a wealthy suburban neighborhood in Orlando; Sapnap cannot help but whistle at the clipped lawns and uniform house designs as he drives past them. Splitting his attention between driving and checking the houses’ addresses, Sapnap nearly misses Dream’s residence before he slams his foot down upon the brakes.
“Sorry about that, Pork Loin!” He apologizes over his shoulder when the guinea pig dives for shelter in its miniature plastic dome.
Dream’s pristine car already waits in his driveway. The host was courteous enough to park on one side of the driveway so Sapnap could fit his car beside it.
Carefully entering the driveway, Sapnap avoids the man who lingers near an off-center mailbox on his left side. Once Sapnap turns off his engine, he hops out of the driver’s seat to greet his host again. He is ready to tell Dream that he is completely willing to handle all of the unpacking alone, but Dream speaks first.
Conflicted, the other man admits, “Hey, Sapnap, before we go inside, I should warn you about Jonathan.” He appears oddly nervous when he mentions his companion’s name.
“Why?” Hiding his concern, Sapnap leans against his car.
“Because you’re not the first person to visit my house. Other people have met Jonathan before, and usually people want to leave after they meet him. Sometimes it's because they think he’s scary, sometimes it’s because he doesn't match their expectations, and sometimes people say he’s too large.” After the confession, Dream clears his throat awkwardly, as if he wishes he did not need to reveal this information to his new guest.
“Wow, Dream, that’s awful.” Sapnap has no idea what else to say. “I’m sorry that people have been so rude to Jonathan. I hope he’s okay.” Hoping to express his sympathy, he promises, “Size doesn’t define anyone’s worth.”
“I’m so glad you understand, Sapnap.” Dream sags with relief. His smile shines with gratitude for his guest. “Sometimes people say they don’t judge based on size, but when they see Jonathan, it’s almost like they don’t actually mean it.” Clicking his tongue, he shakes his head with a half-smile, giving Sapnap the distinct impression that he is tired. “Fortunately Jonathan forgives easily. He has plenty of self-confidence. I’m sure he’ll like you.” Then, with a light-hearted chuckle, Dream rolls up his sleeves and changes the subject. “Anyway, enough standing around! I’ll help you unpack your things.”
“Awesome.” With an internal sigh of relief that his host is happy again, Sapnap turns to unlock his car doors.
Working together, both men unpack personal belongings, clothes, technology, and toiletries from the vehicle. Sapnap removes items from his car and places them upon the driveway while Dream carries items from the driveway and into the house.
At the end of the move-in process, the guest removes his guinea pig’s cage from the back seat and locks the doors again. With a satisfied sigh, he announces loudly, “Alright, I think that’s all!”
From inside, the host responds, “Okay!”
Sapnap's belly churns with anticipation as he leaves his car behind and approaches the porch steps. He scales the three stairs with a single leap, then he slows down as Dream steps aside and holds open the front door for him. “Thanks.”
“No problem.” With an expectant smile, Dream closes and locks the door behind his guest. “Welcome to your home for the next - how long is it supposed to be?”
“Two weeks.” Sapnap's response is breathless as he observes the house’s interior. Immediately he feels a sensation that the house is unusual.
The main living area’s dark hardwood floors are clean and polished. The kitchen on Sapnap's left side is pristine and well-organized. Sunlight streams through the curtains, illuminating the area in a way that should be gorgeous. Instead, Sapnap narrows his eyes as he tries to pinpoint what exactly is different from what he imagined before his arrival.
Struggling to interpret Sapnap's bizarre reaction, Dream asks hopefully, “Do you like it?”
Unwilling to criticize his new friend’s house, Sapnap answers with forced enthusiasm, “Yeah, it’s great!”
Leaning against one wall, he lifts one foot as he prepares to remove his shoes. To his surprise, Dream protests immediately.
“No, keep those on, please!”
“Oh, sorry.” Slightly confused, Sapnap lowers his foot back down to the floor. As his host prepares to help him carry his stuff from the living area to a bedroom, Sapnap lowers his voice. “Wait.”
“Yeah?” Dream lowers his voice, too, even though he appears unsure about why Sapnap did it first.
“Is, uh, Jonathan here?” Sapnap asks quietly. He expected to meet Dream's companion right away, or at least to hear footsteps from another room, but the house is silent.
“Oh yes, Jonathan is here.” Dismissing Sapnap's worry, Dream explains, “He rarely leaves his room during the daytime, and don’t worry, you don’t have to talk softly.” Raising his voice until it is nearly a yell, he calls into the house, “Jonathan, our new housemate Sapnap just walked in!”
No response.
After waiting awkwardly for several seconds, Sapnap asks shyly, “Are you sure that he heard?”
“Yes, but Jonathan doesn’t have the best hearing, so I have to talk loudly to him sometimes, especially from across the house.”
“That’s good to know,” Sapnap hums his acknowledgment and tries to remember the information in case he ever needs to speak directly to his host’s companion.
As Dream and Sapnap begin carrying boxes from the house’s main living area to one of the bedrooms down a hallway, Sapnap realizes exactly what is odd about Dream’s house. All of the furniture is taller than average: the couches, the tables, the chairs, and even the elevated bed in Sapnap's new bedroom. No matter where he is in the house, Sapnap can see the entire floor’s area. Remembering George's warning that his host does not like rodents, he wonders if Dream owns only high furniture to prevent infestations.
Eventually Dream and Sapnap finish the moving process. Sapnap carries Pork Loin’s cage into his new bedroom while Dream carries the last box of his personal belongings behind him. Once they realize there are no more items left to move into the bedroom, the guest debates whether he should start unpacking now, but the host has a different idea.
“Alright!” Clapping his hands together for a small celebration, Dream announces, “Time to plan for dinner!”
“We just ate lunch, like, -” Raising his smartphone, Sapnap prepares to check the time, but he is stunned to discover that more time passed than he thought. “Wait, what? It’s already 4:30pm!”
“Yeah, exactly: almost time for dinner.” Without waiting for Sapnap to catch up, Dream suggests readily, “How about we leave now? We can take my car and unpack your stuff later tonight. It’ll take us at least twenty minutes to find a restaurant and drive there.”
“Sure, that works.” Shoving both hands into his jean pockets, Sapnap discovers that his stomach is already churning with hunger at the thought of food. “Can we buy sandwiches?”
“Absolutely.” Dream grins and jerks his head toward the bedroom’s doorway. “Let’s go.”
As both men walk from the bedroom into the hallway, Dream begins to lead his guest toward the front door until he glances back. Looking over one shoulder, his teal eyes drift past Sapnap before he halts. Pointing behind his new friend, he instructs, “Wait, Sapnap. You have to close your door.”
“Huh?” When Sapnap follows Dream’s finger, he sees that he left his bedroom door open. Although he does not understand why the door should be closed, he retraces his steps to close the door anyway. “I got it! Sorry.”
“No worries.” Like usual, Dream dismisses the apology as he starts to walk forward again. “Personally I don’t care about your door, but I don’t want Jonathan to get curious and look through your things. If the door is closed, then he won’t go inside.”
“Uh, okay.” Despite the wary questions that swirl within his mind, Sapnap falls quiet and accompanies his host as the two men leave the house and climb into Dream’s car.
As they drive from the suburban neighborhood into the main city of Orlando, Sapnap spots a local cafe from the passenger seat. After finding a place to park, the men approach the cafe and dive into easy conversation just like at lunch. Even when they have to wait for their food to be ready, neither Dream nor Sapnap complain about the passage of time.
“I have a garlic bread grilled cheese sandwich for ‘Dean’ and a roasted pepper panini for ‘Snap’!”
Smiling at each other as they hear their misspelled names, Dream and Sapnap retrieve their sandwiches from an employee before leaving the cafe. In the car, Sapnap stores two paper bags of hot food under his bent knees as delectable scents fill the car.
Back at the house, Dream and Sapnap enter the front door and escape Florida’s humid evening air. Once the door closes, only the dull hum of the kitchen refrigerator greets them. Again, Dream alerts his companion to their arrival, “Hello, Jonathan, we’re home!”
No response.
Sapnap does not bother to ask whether Jonathan heard Dream this time. However, he still feels a burning curiosity. As Dream carries their paper bags to the kitchen, Sapnap slips away from his host for the first time to peer down the hallway. Squinting in the low light, he notices that his bedroom door is still closed. “Hey, Dream?”
“Yeah?” Dream’s response mixes with the sound of running water as the host washes his hands in the sink.
“How do I know if Jonathan went into my room or not?”
Briefly Sapnap worries if the question will offend Dream, but his host sounds mildly interested when he answers, “Is the door open?”
“No.”
“Then he didn’t,” Dream replies curtly. His tall figure’s shadow stretches down the hallway as he steps around the corner and into view. “Jonathan doesn’t close doors behind himself.” His footsteps echo behind Sapnap until he sidles up beside his guest in front of the closed door. “Now that you mention it, I wanted to ask where you put your guinea pig. You put the cage in the bedroom, right?”
“Yeah, I’ll show you.” Opening the bedroom door, Sapnap flicks on the overhead light and points to a tall table across from his twin-size guest bed. “I put Pork Loin there.”
Dream hums his acknowledgement. Slipping past Sapnap into the bedroom, he leans sideways to assess the wire cage and its height off the floor. Clicking his tongue, he remarks apologetically, “Maybe you should put it higher.”
“I can do that.” Intrigued, Sapnap scoops up the cage and soothes his confused pet with shushing noises as he carries it across the bedroom. His athletic shoes clomp against the dark hardwood floor; none of the house’s rooms have carpets. Placing the guinea pig’s cage higher, on the top surface of a dresser, he asks, “How about here?”
“Much better,” Dream approves. He places one hand upon his hip and uses a thumb to push fluffy hair out of his eyes before he suggests, “Now how about you come back to the kitchen and eat?”
Eagerly Sapnap agrees. The host and the guest return to the house’s kitchen, where Sapnap washes his hands and Dream unwraps their two large sandwiches. Together the two men eat from plates on the kitchen countertop. Sapnap sits on a bar stool while Dream stands on the polished tiled floor across from him. For several minutes, the house is quiet except for muffled sounds of chewing and deep breaths in between bites.
Suddenly Sapnap realizes that there was only enough food for two people. While Dream tosses dirty napkins into the kitchen’s waste bin and scrapes food scraps into the sink’s garbage disposal, Sapnap hops off his bar stool. “Hey, Dream?”
“Yeah?” While washing his hands for a second time, Dream looks back over one shoulder with raised eyebrows.
“Forgive me for asking, but… is Jonathan going to eat dinner, too?”
“No, he ate in the morning,” Dream responds casually. Drying his hands with a towel that drapes over the oven’s handle, he adds cheerfully, “But I’m sure he would appreciate that you asked.” Once Dream stands fully again, revealing the broadness of his shoulders beneath the kitchen’s overhead light, he turns to meet Sapnap again. “Oh, and also, before I forget to remind you!”
“What is it?”
“Before you go to sleep tonight, close your bedroom door because Jonathan will definitely try to sleep with you if you don’t,” Dream advises calmly. “Once he’s inside a room, it can be really difficult to get him out, so yeah, close the door.”
“I’m sorry, what?” Sapnap's voice pitches with alarm. “Why are you telling me this now?”
Unsure about why Sapnap is yelling at him, Dream tries to reassure his guest, “Oh, don’t worry! Jonathan is really very gentle. Like I said, he can be a little intimidating at first, but once you truly know him -”
“Do you seriously expect me to just lay down here at night with the knowledge that someone is going to try to get into my bed?” Sapnap cannot believe what he is hearing.
“That’s why I told you to keep your door closed, so Jonathan won’t try to sleep with you! Were you even listening?” Dream scoffs with frustration. “Ugh, fine, you know what? Come with me. I’ll take you to meet him, so you can see there’s no need to be afraid -”
“Absolutely not, you’re not taking me to meet him!” Heart pounding, Sapnap lurches backwards when the other man reaches toward him. His throat feels scratchy and dry as he warns, “Dream, you’re freaking me out.”
“I’m sorry, I’m not trying to scare you,” Dream apologizes. The sincerity in his voice is distressing as he skirts around the kitchen countertop, moving slowly to avoid spooking his guest. “I just wanted to warn -”
“I heard you!” Sapnap interrupts his host. Shaking as he backs away toward the front door, he stammers, “Listen, I’ll make an arrangement. I can find somewhere else to stay.”
“What?” Dream’s voice pitches with protest. He stops in place. “But all of your stuff is here already!”
“I don’t care!” Panic rushes through Sapnap's mind as he realizes that, to reach the car key in his bedroom, he will have to pass Dream. “I don’t want to be here anymore. I want to leave. Now.”
“Okay, fine!” Raising his hands in a placating gesture, Dream maintains serious eye contact. He speaks slowly, “Sapnap, I’ll make you a deal. If you let me introduce you to Jonathan, and if you still want to leave after you meet him, then you can go and I won’t argue. I’ll help you pack everything up again, I’ll give you money for gas, and I’ll pay for a hotel room for you to spend the whole two weeks. All you have to do is meet Jonathan, and then you can make whatever decision you want, alright?”
As the other man speaks, Sapnap's boiling panic reduces to a simmering unease. Swallowing hard, he hopes that he is not making a terrible mistake when he agrees, “Alright, that sounds fair.”
“Awesome.” Moving forward and turning to stand beside his guest, Dream reaches to hold Sapnap's hand. Nimble and thick fingers intertwine. “Please follow me. I’ll take you to his room.” Gently he squeezes his guest’s hand for reassurance.
Sapnap is a quaking mess as Dream leads him to a new room of the house: a rectangular sun room with a brown-tiled floor, three glass walls, and a glass ceiling. The only wall that is not glass - the wall that separates the sun room from the rest of the house - is painted to look like a lush green jungle. Fake plants, fake rocks, and chunks of driftwood decorate the sun room’s floor. A kiddie pool full of water sits in one corner. In another corner, a massive heat lamp cranes over an equally oversized pile of towels.
Standing speechless in the sun room’s entrance, Sapnap discovers the truth.
Jonathan is neither Dream’s roommate nor his partner. In fact, Jonathan is not even a human!
Jonathan is a 9-meter-long, 100-kilogram albino Burmese python. Beneath the heat lamp’s bright red light bulb, the yellow-and-white reptile rests unmoving in a big heap. The python’s head pokes out from the center of his spiraling coils.
“That’s Jonathan?” Sapnap's jaw drops with shock and sudden clarity. “He’s a snake?”
“Yes,” Dream confirms with exasperation, as if this fact had been obvious the whole time. Observing the reptile, he explains, “I turn off the heat lamp at night to mimic nighttime in the wild. Since Jonathan is a reptile, he loves heat, so usually he tries to sleep with people to keep warm overnight.” Turning to Sapnap, he prompts, “Satisfied?”
“It’s huge!” Unable to contain his astonishment at the reptile’s colossal size, Sapnap gapes. “Why is it that big? How is it that big?” He barely notices that his fear from minutes ago has vanished.
“Well, of course, size doesn’t always matter as much as you think.” Amused, Dream sends Sapnap a suggestive wink before he continues, “And don’t worry, Jonathan is a total sweetheart. I got so lucky with him. Sometimes snakes can be really finicky.”
Despite Sapnap's immense relief that his life is not in danger, he also doubts that a snake can be “a total sweetheart”. Warily he steps forward to view the gigantic reptile more closely. The snake watches him with two mahogany eyes, but it does not move.
“Are you sure that Jonathan won’t bite?” Sapnap asks nervously.
“Of course! I’ll show you.” Gesturing for the guest to copy him, Dream kneels and waits for Sapnap to follow suit. “Make yourself smaller so you don’t scare him.” Tapping the brown-tiled floor with one hand, Dream beckons, “Here, Jonathan, don’t be shy. Say hello to Sapnap!”
Thankfully the snake appears curious rather than aggressive. Lifting his head slightly, Jonathan begins to unravel himself. Painstakingly he unfurls the first two meters of his enormous length to slither slowly toward Dream’s hand.
As the snake approaches, the host grabs Sapnap's sleeve and places his uncertain hand on the floor beside his own.
“Let him come to you,” Dream instructs. “I fed him an entire rabbit from the butcher this morning so he wouldn’t want to bother anyone for a while.”
As Jonathan’s head reaches Sapnap's hand, his uncurling body reveals a lump in the center of the snake’s length. Sapnap's stomach churns with morbid curiosity when he realizes the lump is the rabbit that Dream mentioned.
Observing his beloved pet with undisguised admiration, Dream nudges Sapnap. “You can pet him, if you want.”
“No thanks, I’ll pass.” Sapnap shivers when Jonathan’s forked tongue flicks out to taste the air.
“Suit yourself,” Dream shrugs. Gently he strokes the smooth yellow-and-white scales of Jonathan’s head. As the snake moves unnervingly closer to the house’s guest, Dream whispers, “Oh, look, he wants to give you a little kiss!”
The snake stares at Sapnap without blinking. Its forked tongue flicks out again and brushes his hand, tickling the skin. Sapnap inhales sharply, but he does not jerk his hand away.
“Dream, why would you give it a human name?” Although the guest is no longer afraid, he is still irritated that no one told him the truth. “I thought Jonathan was, like, your boyfriend!”
“First of all, I gave him a human name because he has a soul, too, just like human beings. Also, to answer your second question: no, I don’t have a boyfriend. I’m single.”
To Sapnap's surprise, that is actually not upsetting news. Maybe it is great news.
“Wait, Sapnap, hold on.” The host interrupts his guest’s thoughts. Frowning, Dream recalls, “Didn’t you name your guinea pig after a food?”
“I -” Sapnap opens his mouth to defend himself until he realizes that the other man is right. “Alright, fine. Yes, I named Pork Loin after a food.” Sheepishly he looks back at the snake, which is slowly recoiling to slither away from its visitors and toward the kiddie pool in the other corner of the room.
Initially Dream smirks with triumph, then his smile becomes awkward. Sharply contrasting against his own haughty attitude from one minute ago, he clears his throat and asks carefully, “Do you still want to go?”
Facing his host, Sapnap stares with bewilderment.
“Because you said you don’t like the idea of living with Jonathan in the house,” Dream explains hastily. “And, I mean, I promised that if you still wanted to leave after you met him, then I would help you pack -”
Realizing what Dream means, Sapnap races to cut him off. “Oh no, I’m good!” He surprises himself with his own eagerness to clarify, “I thought Jonathan was a person, and I was worried that he might hurt me or something, so that was why I panicked. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to yell at you.”
“That’s understandable. You don’t have to apologize.” Thankfully Dream understands. Probably without even thinking about it, he extends one hand to rest upon Jonathan’s girth as the enormous reptile continues to slither past them and into the kiddie pool. By now, both men can see the creature’s tail. Dream sighs heavily, then he confesses, “You know, except for George, I haven’t had a visitor in a long time. Most people are afraid of Jonathan, so no one else comes to my house anymore.” His teal gaze becomes distant as he remembers rejections by previous guests. “Even when I show people that I have a permit to take care of him, no one seems to believe me when I say he won’t hurt them.”
“Well, I think you’ve got everything covered.” Hoping to console his new friend, Sapnap reaches with a hesitant hand before placing it on Dream’s back. He rubs the other man’s shoulder, which is bony but also remarkably muscular. “Clearly you care a lot about it - I mean, him - so much that anyone would assume you consider Jonathan a human being. He’s lucky to have you.”
“You think so?” Dream snaps his head around to stare at Sapnap. Soft lips part as his eyes shine with amazement.
Sapnap's heart soars when relief lights up Dream’s face. Despite the exhausting day and stressful evening, he loves the sight of the other man’s happiness. “Yeah, I do think so. I want to stay here overnight… and I promise I’ll keep my door closed.”
As his guest agrees to remain in the house, Dream stands up. Guiding Sapnap to stand alongside him, the host leans forward and wraps his arms around the other man for a warm hug.
Surprised, Sapnap tenses, then he relaxes when he discovers how gently Dream is holding him.
“I’m so happy that you’re staying with me, Sapnap,” Dream murmurs beyond the smaller man’s shoulder.
Sapnap does not lie when he responds, “I’m glad to be here, too.”
After several seconds, the two men realize their positions and pull apart. Sapnap looks away; Dream looks in the opposite direction.
“Well…” Dream comments.
“Yeah,” Sapnap responds, equally flustered.
Neither the host nor the guest have considered yet exactly how long the upcoming two weeks will last. Despite the rodent in his house, Dream realizes that living with Sapnap does not sound bad at all. Despite the extremely large python in his new home, Sapnap agrees with Dream.