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The incident starts with, of all people, Trafalgar D. Water Law.
It’s the middle of the afternoon and Sanji is happily ensconced in The Baratie’s kitchen doing meal prep work when the doors slam open and an excited Amalie bursts in. She rushes over to where he’s standing, skidding to a stop and bouncing on her toes as she waits for him to pay attention to her.
Taking a final drag of his latest cigarette, Sanji stubs it out in the nearest available ashtray and runs his hands under a faucet to rinse them. Wiping them off on his apron, he looks down at his unexpected guest. “What have I told you about running in the kitchen?” He asks.
“There’s a bear on the deck!” She shrieks back, clearly delighted.
Sanji blinks, running those words over in his head a few times on the off chance that repetition will cause them to make sense. When that doesn’t work, he scrubs a tired hand through his hair. “You’re going to have to give me a few more details, sweet girl.”
“There’s a bear!” She repeats. “It’s white and fluffy and wearing a jumpsuit.”
Ah , Sanji thinks, feeling the opening strains of a headache coming on, so it’s going to be that kind of day.
*****
Gripping Amalie by the hand lest she fling herself at their new arrivals in a fit of excitement, he lets her lead him out to the docking area where he is unsurprised to find a familiar yellow submarine rocking gently with the waves. About half a dozen of the Heart Pirates, Bepo among them, have already disembarked, though their captain has yet to make an appearance.
“Why’s their boat so weird?” Amalie asks, her nose wrinkling as she gives the Polar Tang a once over. “Where are the sails?”
“It doesn’t have any,” Sanji explains. “It travels under the water using propellers … never mind,” he says in the face of her blank stare. “Maybe you can ask one of their crew to explain it to you if they’re sticking around for a bit.”
“Can I ask the bear?”
If Sanji recalls correctly, Bepo is the Heart Pirates’ navigator, not one of their engineers. On the other hand, presumably he has at least some idea of how his ship operates. “Let’s just find out why they’re here first.”
“Probably for the food,” a new voice says, and when Sanji looks around he finds Zoro approaching them from behind. “Unless you were expecting them, I guess.”
“I can assure you, I was not,” Sanji replies as the other man draws level to them. “And Law’s going to get my foot up his backside if he’s knowingly brought trouble to our doorstep. Again.”
“Pretty sure Law thinks it was always us bringing trouble to him,” Zoro points out, and Sanji scoffs.
“If that’s true then he and I remember both Punk Hazard and Dressrosa very differently, to say nothing about Wano. Oh, and speak of the devil,” Sanji nods at where a tall figure in a fluffy, white hat has just emerged. “Look who’s here.”
“You know him?” Amalie asks, using the hold Sanji still has on her to rock back and forth where she stands. “Will he let me see the bear?”
“Can we ignore the bear for a second?” Sanji asks, admittedly amused by how focused she is on the topic. “Let’s go say hi, okay?”
“Yeah!” Amalie crows, and it’s only Sanji’s pre-existing hold on her hand that keeps her from taking off full tilt across the deck. “Come on ,” she huffs when it becomes obvious that he’s not about to let go. “Hurry uppp!”
Allowing himself to be dragged over to the docking ramp, Sanji spares a glance over his shoulder to make sure Zoro’s following them, and then focuses his attention back on their guests. Law, now flanked on either side by Shachi and Penguin, has just landed on The Baratie and is watching their approach with a raised eyebrow.
“Blackleg,” he says, his voice washing over Sanji in the accent of his childhood as he inclines his head to the side. “Who’s your friend?”
Amalie stops then, suddenly growing shy upon becoming the centre of attention. Tightening her grip on his hand, she tries to subtly shift so that he’s standing in front of her, while at the same time not managing to keep herself from peering around at their guests.
Sanji quirks an eyebrow at her. “You want to introduce yourself?”
“Uh uh,” she says, shaking her head. “You can.”
“I see. Well, thank you for that.” Laughing quietly to himself, Sanji nods at Law. “This is Amalie. She’s, uh …”
“Ours.” Zoro supplies, crossing his arms over his chest and giving Law a look that dares him to comment.
Not even Law’s usually implacable expression is enough to hold in the face of that announcement, and his eyes widen in visible surprise. “I … see,” he says slowly, clearly at a loss for words. “Congratulations?”
“Mm.” Zoro grunts. “Why are you here, Trafalgar?”
“And is it going to bring chaos down on our heads?” Sanji asks, more concerned about that. “It might shock you to hear this, but our priorities are a little different these days.”
“No doubt,” Law says, having admirably regrouped and regained his normally dry tone. “You don’t have anything to worry about, however. We were just passing through and a number of the crew wanted to take advantage of our proximity to your restaurant.”
“Huh,” Zoro says, turning to give Sanji a shrug. “Guess I was right, they’re here for the food.”
“Good thing we have plenty of it,” Sanji notes, relieved to learn he doesn’t have to worry about any Emperors or Warlords arriving unexpectedly. Using his free arm, he gestures towards The Baratie’s main entrance. “Follow me then.”
*****
Most of the Heart Pirates spread themselves out in the main dining room, but Law, Penguin, Shachi, Bepo, and a bemused looking Jean Bart seat themselves at a table near the back with Zoro, Sanji and Amalie.
“So,” Law says about halfway through his meal of rice and fish. He casts a glance over at Amalie where she’s busy spooning soup into her mouth. “When did the blessed event occur?”
“A while back,” Zoro says around his own mouthful of rice. “She kind of showed up out of the blue.”
Law gives him a heavy look. “I wasn’t aware children were something that just randomly happened to people.” He says mildly. “I’ll have to be sure to keep my guard up.”
Amalie giggles from where she’s sitting sandwiched between Sanji and Zoro. “You’re funny.”
All the members of Law’s crew minus Jean Bart start snickering, but the captain gives no indication he’s bothered. “Thank you,” he says, still in that same mild voice. “I’ll choose to take that as a compliment.”
Amalie makes a face that says she’s changing her determination of Law’s character from funny to straight up weird, but luckily she keeps that thought to herself. Sanji gives himself a mental pat on the back for that one, since there’s absolutely no way she’s picked up such manners from Zoro.
“She was a stowaway on a merchant ship that docked here,” he says, figuring they may as well offer up at least part of an explanation. “She got caught before they left and the captain didn’t take it well. One thing led to another, and now here we are.”
Law’s lips twitch in the barest hint of a smile. “I have a feeling that’s a very abridged version of events, but that’s fine. Do the rest of your crew know yet?”
“Oh yeah, they’ve been and gone,” Sanji laughs. “Every last one of them came out to meet her, and they call regularly.”
“Huh, I’m surprised Straw Hat never said anything,” Law muses. “We saw him not that long ago, and I would have expected him to be spreading the news to all and sundry.”
Sanji’s frankly a little surprised himself that Luffy hadn’t caved and said anything. Presumably Nami and Robin had been keeping a close eye on him. “Who knows what goes on in that one’s head?” He says aloud. “Your guess is as good as mine.”
“I hope not,” Law drawls. “I’m not sure I actually want to know how his brain works.”
“Touché,” Sanji agrees, saluting him with his fork.
“‘S he talking about Luffy?” Amalie asks, her voice muffled thanks to the way she’s busy licking her spoon clean at the same time.
“Yes,” Sanji says, already armed with a napkin to go after the mess she’s just smeared over the side of her face. “Child, you eat like your … that one,” he says, nodding in Zoro’s direction. “Hold still and let me fix you.”
Law’s chuckle can be heard over the sound of Amalie’s resulting disgruntled noises, and he glances over at Zoro. “I take it she has your name then?”
Zoro pauses with his fork halfway to his mouth, his gaze skittering sideways for a moment to lock with Sanji’s overtop of Amalie’s head. “We haven’t really discussed that one yet,” he says awkwardly. “Though, I guess … maybe?”
“Definitely,” Sanji says, not needing so much as a second to think about it. “Like hell is she getting my name,” he adds, appalled by the very idea. “I’d never allow that.”
Amalie stills in his grip, and Sanji uses this uncharacteristic moment of weakness to swoop in with his napkin, mopping up the worst of the mess before she can squirm away from him. “There,” he says, leaning back to admire his handiwork. “You are once again presentable.”
“Whatever,” she mutters, her cheeks flushing as she turns away from him.
Assuming he’s now fulfilled his parental obligations by embarrassing her in front of their guests, he opts not to press any further. Returning his attention to Law instead, he nods at the other pirate. “So, what have you lot been up to since we saw you last?”
“Nothing quite as dramatic as the two of you,” Law admits, shifting to rest his elbows on top of the table, his posture that of a man who’s willing to tell a tale or two. “But we’ve been keeping busy.”
Having no trouble believing that to be the case, Sanji settles in to let the man talk.
*****
The Heart Pirates finish up their meal, and leave not long after that. Law murmurs something about being on a schedule, which could mean any number of things coming from him, and herds his crew back to their ship with little fanfare. He does, however, remain on the deck with Sanji and Zoro while his people ready their ship to depart.
“Where’d the little one go?” He asks, glancing around curiously when he notices Amalie hasn’t bothered following them outside.
“Probably with Zeff,” Sanji says, unconcerned. “She’s developed the bizarre idea that he’s good company. I haven’t the slightest idea how that happened, although I suppose bribery on his part isn’t out of the question.”
Law raises one perfectly sculpted eyebrow. “Your family is extremely strange,” he comments.
Zoro snorts and thumps him on the shoulder, the move deliberately designed to be annoying. “You’ve sailed with us enough that you shouldn’t be surprised by that one.”
“I never said I was,” Law replies, stepping just far enough sideways to put himself out of reach. “Your daughter was a surprise, the two of you still being odd as hell was not.”
“Don’t use the ‘D’ word,” Zoro tells him, jerking his head in Sanji’s direction. “Cook still gets all squirrely about the whole thing every now and again. You have to be careful not to push him too far.”
“I’ll push you into the damn ocean if you don’t watch your mouth,” Sanji growls, a burst of heat flaring in his heel while he considers whether or not to make good on the threat. “And there’s no guarantee I’ll let you back onto the ship either.”
“Oh, don’t look at me,” Law says, raising his hands in front of him when Zoro’s gaze cuts over to him. “I make it a point never to get involved in domestic disputes. Give me a fight with that Navy any day over that.”
“Wise man,” Sanji says. “Wish I could have fallen for one of those.”
“And on that note,” Law says, as Zoro very maturely sticks his tongue out in response, “I do believe my ship is ready to leave. Thanks for the food, I’ll be sure to stop by again the next time I’m in the area.”
“Law, wait,” Sanji calls after him, relieved when the serious note in his voice makes the other man turn back around. “All jokes aside, there’s a reason we haven’t been spreading the news about Amalie over hell and creation. A lot of our enemies may be dead, but not all of them are.”
“You don’t have to say it, Blackleg,” Law replies, and his tone is, for him, down right gentle. “I’m perfectly capable of reading between the lines. I’ll make sure this stays between me and my crew.”
“Thanks,” Sanji says, relieved. “I know it’ll get out eventually, but I’d rather push that off for as long as possible.”
“Understandable,” Law agrees. Nodding in farewell, he climbs up the ramp and soon disappears into the bowels of his ship.
“Well that was unexpected,” Sanji says as they watch the Polar Tang get underway. “Not to mention, it’s gone and put me behind schedule. Crap knows what the dinner rush is going to look like now.”
“Probably the same as it does every night,” Zoro replies. “I’m going back to the crow’s nest. I’ll be down later.”
“Uh huh.” Waving him off, Sanji ambles back towards the restaurant, moving through the dining room this time and all the way into the kitchen. It’s already bustling with his staff, and he spots Zeff parked over at his own station, industriously chopping vegetables.
Peeking around for a familiar tiny figure, Sanji’s surprised when he doesn’t find one planted nearby. He nods at Zeff, who’s now watching him warily out of the corner of his eye. “I thought Amalie might be in here,” he says by way of an explanation. “She disappeared while the Heart Pirates were taking off.”
“I haven’t seen her,” Zeff says, “but I’m sure she’ll turn up eventually. Maybe she’s in her room.”
“It’s possible,” Sanji admits, rooting around for an apron so he can get to work. “Hand me a knife, would you?”
*****
Amalie reappears at supper time, but barely picks at her food. Figuring he can possibly chalk this up to her late lunch messing with her appetite, Sanji tries not to read anything into it, although he can’t help but notice that she’s oddly quiet as well.
Finally, he caves. “Are you feeling alright?” He asks, watching as she pushes the food on her plate around in circles, smushing it to the side in a poor attempt to make it look like she’s eaten more than she has. “You’re not coming down with something, are you?”
“I’m fine,” she says, shoving him away when he presses the back of his hand to her forehead to check for a fever. “What are you doing?”
“Trying to see if you’re okay.” He replies. The brief contact she’d allowed had been enough to confirm her skin was cool to the touch, so at least there’s that much out of the way. “Is your stomach upset?”
“No, I’m just not hungry.”
Sanji frowns. “You are never not hungry. Marimo, back me up here.”
Zoro looks up from his own plate, which is already nearly scraped clean. “Cook’s got a point there, kiddo,” he says around the remains of a dinner roll. “S’not like you not to finish everything in front of you.”
“I said I’m not hungry,” Amalie stoutly replies. Pushing her plate away, she sits back in her chair with her arms crossed over her chest. “Can I go now?”
About to remind her how he feels about wasted food, Sanji pauses when Zoro catches his eye. The swordsman gives him a tiny shake of his head, indicating he too thinks something might be up. Biting back a sigh, Sanji nods instead. “Yes, fine. We’ll see you before bedtime.”
Amalie mutters something incomprehensible under her breath and scrambles down from her seat. Sanji watches as she heads in the direction of the stairwell, not taking his eyes off her until she’s out of sight and a scraping sound draws his attention.
“What?” Zoro asks, freezing under the weight of Sanji’s raised eyebrow. He glances at the hand he has curved over the edge of Amalie’s abandoned plate. “We both know this isn’t going to keep well as leftovers.”
Acknowledging his point with a nod, Sanji pulls a cigarette out of his pocket and lights it as the other man digs in. “Do you think I should have checked her for more than just a fever?” He asks after he’s taken a couple of drags.
“I think she’s probably just tired from the excitement of having Law and his crew around,” Zoro replies. “You saw how worked up she got over his navigator.”
“Except that vanished over lunch,” Sanji points out. “She didn’t even come say goodbye while they were leaving.”
“So she got a little overwhelmed. It happens.” Zoro shrugs. “Remember what it was like the first time she met Luffy and the others?”
“Sure, but she was still happy overall after that. She just needed a break from all the excitement. This feels different.”
Zoro sighs. “Have you ever heard the phrase ‘don’t borrow trouble’? Stop looking for problems where there aren’t any and give it a rest. I’m sure everything’s fine.”
“If you say so,” Sanji replies, exhaling a moody cloud of cigarette smoke. “But I’m going to make you regret it if you’re wrong.”
“What else is new?” Zoro mutters before returning to his food.
*****
Over the past several months, Amalie’s bedtime routine has evolved into something of a two pronged attack. Zoro’s been the one responsible for getting her washed and dressed in her pajamas from the get go - an arrangement he hadn’t been willing to give up once she’d become a permanent fixture in their lives. Equally unwilling to be left out, however, Sanji takes care of tucking her in and reading her a bedtime story, the two of them trading off after the first set of tasks have been completed.
Sanji’s in the bathroom hauling on his own pajamas when he hears the telltale sounds of Zoro returning to their quarters. Poking his head out, he sees the other man wandering into their room, scrubbing a hand through his hair as he moves.
“She ready for me?” He asks, the words admittedly coming out somewhat garbled thanks to the toothbrush he has shoved in his mouth. He ducks back inside to spit a mouthful of foam into the sink.
“Yeah,” comes the reply, audible even over the sound of the now running water. “She’s kind of grumpy though.”
Sanji pauses in the act of patting his face dry with a towel. “Define ‘grumpy’,” he says, his voice muffled by the fabric. “As in - you’re admitting I was right earlier and you now think there’s a chance she might be sick?”
Zoro becomes visible behind him in the mirror when he pulls the towel away, apparently having padded into the bathroom without Sanji noticing. “She’s not that kind of grumpy,” he says then. “She’s just a little … off.”
“I am in awe of your keen knack for description,” Sanji huffs, not liking this one bit. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Zoro shrugs. “I said what I said,” he replies unhelpfully. “Go see for yourself.”
“Believe me,” Sanji says, racking the used towel and turning to navigate around the other man in the narrow space, “I fully intend to. Out of the way, mosshead. I’ve got places to be.”
He receives a grunt in reply, but Zoro obediently shuffles out of the way to let him get through. Presumably he’s going to get changed now himself, after which they can all hopefully put this weird as hell day behind them.
Exiting their quarters, Sanji pads down the hall until he reaches Amalie’s room. Pushing the door open with one hand, he peers inside and finds her already sitting on her bed with her arms wrapped around the stuffed bear Zeff had given her after her first night with them.
There’s an expression he can’t quite place twisting her features; whatever it is no doubt contributing to Zoro’s recent assessment of her mood. Hoping to be able to do something about that, he knocks gently on the doorframe to get her attention.
“Hey, miss,” he says. “Do you have any idea what story you want tonight?”
“None,” she replies without bothering to look up, and Sanji blinks, certain he must have heard that wrong.
“What do you mean, none?” He asks, leaning up against the doorframe. “You always want a story. You love them.”
“Do not,” she disagrees, still not looking at him.
“Alright, none of this is doing anything to convince me something isn’t wrong with you.” Pushing away from the doorframe, Sanji starts to make his way into the room, only to freeze when Amalie finally tilts her head up.
“I said,” she starts, her voice sharp and her eyes bright. “I don’t want a story. Not from you anyway.”
“Me?” Sanji blurts before he can stop himself. “What the hell did I do?”
He’s expecting her to snap back at him - maybe even start shouting - but what happens instead is even worse. Her bottom lip wobbles and there’s a notable catch in her voice when she says, “You mean you don’t even know?”
“Obviously not,” he says, raising his hands in a pleading gesture when she continues staring at him with a heartbreaking expression. “Amalie, what is it? What’s wrong?”
Blinking rapidly, she shakes her head, burying her face in her bear when he makes an abortive move in her direction. “It’s your fault if you don’t know, and I don’t have to tell you!”
“Okay, now that’s just ridiculous,” Sanji replies, struggling somewhat to keep a lid on his temper in the face of her refusal to meet him even partly halfway. “I get that you’re upset about something, but I can’t help you with it if you won’t tell me what it is.”
“I don’t want your help!” She barks, once again putting the emphasis on him personally being the source of her problem. “And I’m not ridiculous, you are!”
“Amalie - ” he tries, but she’s apparently done even pretending to humour him because she flops over on her side, facing the wall determinedly and refusing to look at him. “Amalie, I just want to talk .”
“Well I don’t ,” she returns, dragging the blankets up over her for added emphasis. “I want you to go away!”
“What the hell is going on in here?”
Sanji turns to where Zoro is now standing in the bedroom doorway, no doubt having been alerted by the sound of raised voices coming from down the hall. Having no idea how to respond, he shrugs helplessly and hopes that gets his point across.
“She’s mad at me,” he says when Zoro just stares at him. “But she won’t tell me why.”
“And I don’t gotta!” Amalie says helpfully from within the depths of her blanket cocoon.
Sanji flaps both hands in her direction in a ‘you see what I mean?’ gesture, before running them both furiously through his hair. “She started at me as soon as I came in. I have no idea what I did. Oi,” he adds, a thought suddenly occurring to him. “Will you talk to mosshead here if I leave?”
“No!” Amalie snaps, cutting off whatever annoyed retort Zoro was about to make over the insult. “He’ll just take your side.”
“Since when?” Sanji asks, honestly not even sure who he’s talking to at this point. “You’re not making any sense!”
A large hand wraps around his elbow, and he looks down to find that Zoro’s shuffled further into the room without him noticing. “I think,” he says, his good eye fixed on the blanket covered lump on the bed, “that we might want to leave her alone for a minute.”
“Well I think we should figure out what’s going on first,” Sanji retorts, trying without success to break free of Zoro’s grip. “Would you quit manhandling me, you overgrown ape?”
“Both of you get out!” Amalie yells from her makeshift cavern.
Zoro and Sanji freeze, the pair of them sharing a look in which Sanji capitulates and lets himself be dragged out of the room. The sound of the door closing behind them puts Sanji in mind of some kind of death knell, and he’s not surprised to find that Zeff’s been roused by the noise and is now making his way towards them.
“What in the world - ?” The old man starts, but Sanji ignores him in favour of rounding on Zoro.
“You said she seemed off,” He hisses, pointing at the swordsman accusingly. “Not demonically possessed.”
Zoro looks like he’s gearing himself up to reply, but Zeff cuts him off with a wave of his hand. “Far be it from me to tell you two how to parent your kid, but I don’t think this is the place for this little chat. Odds are good she can hear you through that door.”
Sanji stiffens, and across from him Zoro does the same, the pair of them both turning in tandem to look at the unassuming door to Amalie’s room. “I suppose,” Sanji says slowly, “that we should take this downstairs.”
*****
If someone had told Sanji a year ago that he’d one day find himself in The Baratie’s kitchen in the middle of the night, stress baking and chainsmoking multiple cigarettes at once because his offspring is mad at him, he’d have laughed in their face. Unfortunately, that is exactly the predicament in which he’s now in. Even better, he has the added bonus of listening to Zeff and Zoro argue over potential causes of said offspring’s upset, like they’re an especially shitty soundtrack to round out his already terrible night.
“Well there must have been something,” Zeff is saying now, his moustache bristling as he tries and fails to hide his own agitation. “She was fine this morning. And for most of the afternoon.”
“We know,” Zoro replies. “She was good for most of Law’s visit too.”
“Don’t remind me,” Zeff huffs. “My grandbaby having lunch with a former Warlord. Tch!”
Sanji can’t help but look up at that. “What are you talking about?” He asks, his hands still stirring the ingredients in the mixing bowl he’s holding. “Who cares if he’s an ex-Warlord? So’s Mihawk, and we let him see her. Not to mention Jimbei.”
Zeff sniffs. “That’s different.”
“Regardless,” Zoro says, cutting in before Zeff can elaborate on this frankly baffling train of thought. “It wasn’t Law either. She didn’t have a problem with him or his crew.”
“That you know of,” Zeff says ominously. “Maybe they said something that upset her.”
“It’s me she’s upset with,” Sanji reminds him. “And besides, none of them really said much to her. We just ate and swapped stories about what everyone’s been up to.”
“Did they ask about Amalie?”
“Of course they did,” Sanji says, rolling his eyes. “She’s kind of hard to miss, and anybody who knows us is going to be curious about her.”
“Right,” Zeff agrees. “So what’d you tell them?”
“Not much,” Zoro says, picking up the thread where Sanji’s left off. “Just a really barebones version of how she ended up here. Oh, and Law was wondering about her name at one point.”
“Her name?” Zeff echoes, his brow furrowed. “The fuck’s that got to do with anything? What, did he think you two changed it when you took her in?”
“Not her first name,” Zoro clarifies. “Her last one. He was wondering if we gave her one of ours.”
A scratching sound rings out as Sanji sends the spoon he’s using completely through the batter and rakes it along the bottom of the bowl. “Son of a bitch.”
“Cook?”
“What in hell’s name, Eggplant?”
“I know what’s wrong with her,” Sanji says. Carefully setting the bowl down with fingers that have suddenly gone numb, he fumbles with the strings of his apron as he tries to get it off of him. “ Fuck . I know exactly what this is.”
“ … would you care to share with the class?” Zeff asks after the better part of a minute has passed by where the only sounds in the room are that of Sanji cursing at the apron. “Or is it on a more need to know basis?”
“Fuck off, old man,” Sanji retorts, still tugging ineffectively at the strings. “Just give me a damn minute, will you?”
“Here, let me do it,” Zoro says, stepping over and grabbing Sanji by the shoulder to turn him around. “You’re just making it worse.”
“Don’t you dare cut anything,” Sanji starts, but Zoro merely rolls his eye and keeps pulling at the strings. For some reason, they give him far less trouble and he’s able to unknot them in only a few moments.
“There,” he says, spinning Sanji back around so they’re facing one another. “Now, what the hell are you talking about? What do you mean, you know what’s going on?”
Sanji hauls the apron off and flings it towards the nearest available hook. “You just said it,” he replies nonsensically, running a furious hand through his hair. “Law asked about her last name, and what did you tell him?”
“That we hadn’t really figured that out yet, but probably mine,” Zoro dutifully replies.
“And I said?”
“You said definitely mine, not yours.”
“No!” Sanji corrects, waving a finger frantically in his face. “That is not what I said, not even remotely.”
“It’s exactly what you said,” Zoro replies, now clearly getting exasperated. “You said definitely mine because like hell is she getting yours. So what? It’s not like I’m going to disagree with you on that one. Your family fucking sucks.”
“Yes,” Sanji says flatly. “But Amalie doesn’t know that.”
Silence descends over the kitchen, and he watches several emotions play over Zoro’s face until, “Fuck.”
“Quite,” Sanji says, laughing mirthlessly. “No wonder she’s so upset. I as good as told her I don’t want her to be part of my family.”
“Cook - Sanji, that’s not what you meant - ”
“ I know that,” Sanji confirms. “That’s not the problem. The problem is how it came across. Get out of my way. I have to go fix this.”
For once in his life, Zoro does as he’s told and scrambles out of Sanji’s way as he storms past.
*****
Sanji’s long since reached Amalie’s door by the time Zoro catches up to him, and is glaring at it hard enough that he’s surprised he hasn’t burnt a hole through it. “It’s locked,” he says as the other man approaches. “And she is not interested in opening it.”
Zoro considers this. “Break it down?” He suggests after a few moments of contemplation.
“Tempting,” Sanji admits, “but probably not the best way to defuse the situation.” He reaches up and knocks for the third time in as many minutes. “Amalie, would you please open the door? We need to talk.”
“Go away!”
Sanji gestures at the door with both hands. “For the record, that’s the same result I got the other times I tried.”
“Can’t say I’m surprised based on the degree of the mixup.” And that’s Zeff heard from, the aging chef having come up after Zoro, puffing slightly from his expedited climb up the stairs. “Poor thing’s probably feeling fairly raw right now.”
“Thank you,” Sanji groans, giving serious thought to banging his head against the door in front of him. “I’m so glad I have you here to help me right when I thought I couldn’t possibly feel any worse.”
Opting to try and avoid giving himself a concussion, Sanji simply presses his forehead to the store instead. “Amalie, sweetheart, this has all been a big misunderstanding, I promise. If you can just give me a few minutes, we’ll get it sorted out.”
“I don’t want to,” Amalie says from inside, and Sanji doesn’t think he’s imagining the hiccup in her voice. “I don’t want you to say mean stuff again.”
“No, no, I promise you that is not going to happen,” Sanji insists. “And as for what I said earlier, you misunderstood what I meant, but that’s on me because I didn’t think about the context you were missing. Please open the door.”
Silence, over which Zoro can be heard muttering, “Did he ever do this to you at this age?”
“No,” Zeff replies, ignoring the dirty look Sanji shoots at the pair of them. “Eggplant was never one for hiding away when something had him upset. He was much more in your face about that kind of thing.”
“Not helpful,” Sanji mutters.
“Hey, all I’m doing is answering the man’s question,” Zeff says, hands raised defensively.
Ignoring him, Sanji raps his knuckles on the door again. “Young lady, if you put me in a position where I have to air my deep seated childhood trauma through the keyhole of this door, well, I’ll do it, but it’s going to be embarrassing for both of us. Please open up.”
“Cook,” Zoro groans, while elsewhere Zeff buries his face in his hands.
“What?” Sanji demands, pointing a finger at him when he gets an exasperated eye roll in return. “Don’t you look at me like that, Marimo. Desperate times call for desperate measures.”
“I’m going to bed,” Zeff says then. “One of you can tell me in the morning if you’ve done irreparable damage to the kid or not.”
“That’s not funny!” Sanji calls after him as he stomps off. He gets the sound of Zeff’s door slamming shut behind him in return. “Rude old bastard, who does he think he is?”
“Your father,” Zoro retorts, pointedly ignoring Sanji’s resulting sputtering. “Now are you sure you don’t want to just break the door down?”
“Positive,” Sanji replies. “You know I’m right. If we barge into her private space every time she needs a little distance, that’s going to send a terrible message. Having said that,” he adds, deliberately raising his voice to ensure he’s heard through the door, “I bet it’s going to make everyone feel a whole lot better if we talk this out before we all end up going to sleep with hurt feelings.”
Zoro gives him a flabbergasted look, but Sanji immediately hushes him when he makes to open his mouth. He can hear the faint sound of footsteps approaching the door, and after several long moments, it clicks open.
“Thank fuck,” he breathes, running an exhausted hand through his hair as the tiniest of cracks appears between door and wall. He can just barely see one of Amalie’s eyes peering up at him accusingly. “There you are, sweet girl. Will you please give me a chance to explain?”
A number of seconds tick by in silence, and then the door opens wider with Amalie stepping back to give him room to enter. He throws a look over his shoulder at Zoro. “Are you coming?”
“Should I be?” Zoro wonders. “I don’t want to make things worse.”
Sanji gives him a flat stare. “Under the circumstances,” he says dryly, “I don’t think even you could do that. Just back me up, will you?”
Taking Zoro’s answering nod for the acceptance he knows it’s supposed to be, he sucks in a fortifying breath and steps carefully over the threshold of the room, mentally bracing for impact if Amalie reacts poorly to his presence.
She doesn’t say anything, though. Instead, she simply walks back over to her bed and climbs into the blanket nest she appears to have made for herself, grabbing her bear along the way.
“Well this looks nice and cozy,” he says, hoping to break the tension a little. Judging by the halfhearted shrug she gives him, it doesn’t work, so he runs a hand through his hair and then waves it at the foot of her bed. “Can I sit?”
Another shrug, and now she refuses to meet his eye. “I guess.”
He shares a quick look with Zoro who silently motions him forward, and then carefully settles down in the allotted space. “Okay,” he says, unsure of how to begin. “So, first of all, am I right in assuming this about when we were talking about names during lunch?”
Amalie presses her lips together so tightly that the skin around her mouth goes white and angles herself so she’s staring at a blank spot on the wall. There’s also no missing the way her shoulders are shaking.
Sanji hasn’t felt this ashamed of himself since, well, he’s not sure he’s ever felt this ashamed of himself, which is saying something. “I’m, uh, going to take that as a yes,” he says weakly.
Suddenly overcome with a need to touch her, he leans forward and curves an arm around her small frame, catching her at the exact moment the dam breaks and she starts to cry. “Oh no, no there’s no need of that,” he murmurs. “Come here.”
Expecting at least a token fuss, he’s surprised when she puts up no resistance to him hauling her into his arms. “Shhh,” he hushes, crooning the noise into her hair. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. I’m so sorry.”
“Did I do something wrong?” She whimpers, and Sanji’s pretty sure he feels his own heart shatter at her words.
“Of course you didn’t,” he rushes to say, rubbing a hand over her back as he clutches her to him. “You could never. Not like you mean.”
He wonders as he rocks her in his arms just how much of her recent anger was a front to hide her hurt feelings. Probably most of it, if he’s being honest, fully aware he’d done similar things with Zeff as a child, too young to know how to articulate what was really wrong.
Feeling completely out of his depth, he lets her cry against him, her tears soaking into the collar of his t-shirt as he murmurs mindless words of comfort that seem to be getting them nowhere. Desperate, he searches for something, anything he can do to make her feel better.
Strong arms wrapping around them jolts him out of the trance he’s fallen into and he sees a shock of green hair pass in front of his face as Zoro leans down to kiss the top of Amalie’s head. Then he’s up again, and Sanji feels those same lips brush against his temple.
“Just tell her,” Zoro says, still securely holding them both. “It’ll be alright.”
“Yeah,” Sanji says raggedly. “Yeah, I know.”
He takes a deep breath to steady himself and glances down at Amalie, able to see only the top of her head thanks to the way she’s curled in on herself. Hoping she won’t mind, he nudges his thumb and forefinger under her chin, tilting her head up to look at him.
She stares back at him, her blue eyes immeasurably sad, and he mentally kicks himself for how badly he’s managed to fuck this up. It’s his job to protect her, he’s not supposed to be the one causing her pain.
“Cook,” Zoro says, and Sanji nods in a tacit admission that he’s let the silence drag on too long.
“I know,” he says again. Steeling his shoulders, he closes his eyes and tries to think about how to explain.
“I don’t want you to have my name,” he says, tightening his hold when she hiccups, “but not because of anything you’ve done. My name is a nasty thing that belongs to people who bring only pain and suffering to others, and you are too good for it.”
“You know how Zeff raised me, but isn’t my biological father?” He asks, waiting until she nods before he continues. “Well the other one’s still out there somewhere, and it’s his name I’ve got, which I hate. He is a bad, bad man who’s hurt a lot of people, myself included. I don’t want his name for myself, and I would never, ever give it to someone I love.”
“That’s what I meant earlier,” he says, reaching out to dry her eyes with his thumb. “You are worth far more than the likes of that ugly name, and I’d never want you to carry it. Do you understand?”
“Not really,” she says, and Sanji has to bite down on a completely inappropriate urge to laugh.
“I guess that’s fair,” he says, the words coming easier now that he’s started speaking. Needing the space suddenly, he pushes back against Zoro, pressing until the other man releases his hold but doesn’t move away entirely.
“It’s like this,” he says, choosing his words carefully. “I was born to people who mostly didn’t want me, and, with one exception, those of them who are still alive think I’m a failure, a disgrace. It took me a long time to realize they were the ones in the wrong, but now we have nothing to do with each other. The only thing we share these days is our name, and you have no idea how much I wish we didn’t have even that much in common.”
“My name,” he continues on, voice turning fierce, “is not something I would ever give to someone I love - not to you and not to this clown here,” he adds with a nod at Zoro. “Not Zeff or Luffy or any of the crew. It’s not because I don’t want to share a name with you, though. It’s just that I don’t want to give you the one that I have. I don’t even use it myself.”
“So it’s not because you don’t want me?”
“Of course not,” he breathes, holding her tightly. He’d thought they’d dealt with this insecurity, but apparently it’s still something they need to work on. “You are one of the best things to ever happen to me, and I wouldn’t trade you for anything.”
“Promise?” She asks, staring up at him with big, searching eyes.
“Cross my heart,” he replies, the same way he always does when she asks him that. He’s rewarded with a genuine, if small, smile and finds himself needing to hug her some more, resting his chin on top of her head and breathing in the clean scent of her hair.
“Squishing,” she complains, and he doesn’t need to see her face to be able to picture the way she’s wrinkling her nose.
“Too bad,” he says, huffing out a laugh. “You had me worried there, so you’re just going to have to deal with a little fussing for now.”
She wriggles around, head butting him until he moves enough that she can peer back up at him. “You really wouldn’t trade me for anything?” She asks.
“Not a damn thing,” he confirms. “Which should tell you plenty if we’re being honest because I’d hand over kelp-for-brains here for a packet of beans.”
Amalie’s resulting laugh mixes with Zoro’s outraged squawk, and Sanji has to fend off the other man’s elbow when he tries to dig it into his side in retribution. “Stop that,” he hisses. “All you’re doing is proving my point.”
“Serves you right,” Zoro snorts, trying to eke around Amalie, who Sanji is now using as a shield. “You’re an ass, curlybrows.”
“Hey, it could have been worse,” Sanji protests. “I’d give Zeff away for free.”
“I’m flattered.” Zoro mutters, but there’s no missing the fondness in his eye or the amusement curving the corners of his lips up in a smile. He knows what Sanji’s doing, and has no problem with playing along.
A small hand curling around the neckline of his shirt brings an end to their tussling. “Can I ask a question?” Amalie asks when they look down at her, and Sanji shrugs to indicate she should go ahead. “If you hate your name so much, why don’t you just change it?”
Sanji stares down at her where she’s still curled into his chest, thrown by the unexpected query. “Uh, well,” he stutters. “I guess I never really thought about it before. Besides, what would I even change it to?”
“You could have mine.”
His heart skipping a beat, Sanji looks over at Zoro and finds the other man staring back at him with a laser focused gaze. He blinks. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
Zoro doesn’t flinch or break eye contact. “What do you think it means?”
“I don’t - I’m not - ” Sanji gapes at him, the wheels in his head turning over slowly as he tries to process what he’s pretty sure is happening. “Is this - is this your idea of a marriage proposal?!”
“That depends,” Zoro replies, still infuriatingly calm.
“On what?!”
“On whether or not you’re going to say yes.”
“Of course I’m going to say yes,” Sanji shrieks, flailing his arms helplessly. Between them, Amalie is watching this ridiculousness unfold like a spectator at a sporting event, hopefully categorizing all the ways not to let herself get proposed to in the future. “That’s not the point .”
“Then what is?” Zoro asks.
Lord above, where does he even begin? “It’s the middle of the night,” he says, ticking things off on his fingers. “We’ve just barely recovered from a moment of excessive family drama. We’re in our pajamas. There are no romantic accoutrements to be seen, including, I feel I must point out, rings . Zeff can probably hear us and is going to laugh in our faces in the morning. Not to mention, our child is a witness because we are in her bedroom . Does none of this mean anything to you?”
“Nope,” Zoro says easily, an obnoxious grin crossing his face. “It’s been ten years and I love you, dumbass. Marry me?”
And Sanji must have brain damage or something because that’s the only explanation for the feeling of happiness that’s bubbling up in his chest. “Alright, fine. Sure. I suppose I’ve done stupider things in my life.”
Zoro matches his beaming smile with one of his own and hooks a hand around the back of Sanji’s neck, using his hold to drag him in for a kiss. Unfortunately, they manage to make it last for only a few seconds before Amalie starts making grossed out noises.
Pulling back, Sanji grabs for her, tickling her mercilessly with both hands. “Think you’re funny, do you?” He asks over her resulting shrieks of laughter. “Or do you just feel like ruining important moments for people?”
“You said he got it all wrong!” She protests in between giggles. “Are you gonna have a wedding and can I come if you do?”
“Yes and yes,” Sanji replies, letting her up with one last dash of his fingers along her side. “Anyone who thinks I’m getting married without a party is sadly mistaken, and obviously I want all our friends and family there.”
“Ugh, you’re going to make this into a big thing , aren’t you?” Zoro complains, heaving an overdramatic sigh. He nudges Amalie in the shoulder with his knuckles. “You’re going to have to help me keep him under control, okay?”
Nodding enthusiastically, she bounces on the spot. “I can do that,” she promises. “I’m good at helping.”
“I know,” Zoro confirms. Then he stands abruptly, climbing to his feet in one fluid motion and hauling a squealing Amalie up with him as he goes. “Alright,” he says, throwing her over one massive shoulder as she kicks him in delight. “Who’s up for celebrating?”
“ Marimo ,” Sanji scolds, even as he stands as well. “It’s hours past her bedtime at this point.”
“And?” Zoro replies, Amalie bobbing up and down as he shrugs. “Special occasions don’t recognize bedtimes.”
“I want ice cream,” Amalie adds helpfully, her voice carrying easily despite the fact that she’s dangling upside down against Zoro’s back.
“Absolutely not,” Sanji protests. “You don’t need sugar at this hour.”
“But I’m hungry!”
“You’re hungry because you hardly touched your supper,” Sanji says confidently. “If you’d actually eaten it you wouldn’t be having this problem.”
“I was too sad to eat,” she replies. “My feelings were hurt.”
Sanji’s breath catches, but before he can stutter out a response, Zoro’s cutting in.
“She’s playing you,” he says, twisting his arm in a move that gives him the necessary leverage to shift Amalie onto his hip in a more natural carry. “Like a goddamn fiddle.”
Based on the unrepentant look on Amalie’s face, Sanji’s going to assume that’s a safe bet. Unfortunately, he’s equally aware that he’s about to fold like yesterday’s laundry. Heaving out a heavy sigh, he moves in close enough to cup a hand over her head. “You really want ice cream?”
“Yup!”
Sanji sighs again and smacks a kiss onto her forehead. “Alright,” he says, shifting to press another to Zoro’s cheek as well. “Ice cream it is, and I’ll see if I can find something non-sweet to impress your palate as well.”
He’s not fast enough to evade the arm Zoro snakes around his waist, and if he’s being honest he’s not overly interested in trying. Meeting the other man halfway, he allows himself to be tugged in for a proper kiss, unable to keep from smiling as he goes.
“Don’t need anything else,” Zoro rumbles, “but if you want to lead the way, I’ll follow.”
*****
Miraculously, Zeff does not laugh at them the next morning. He does, however, suggest that they should invite Law to the wedding as a thank you, which is somehow worse. Burying his face in his hands, Sanji despairs of his entire, ridiculous family.