Chapter Text
Ayaka finds it odd how Thoma seems to enjoy his job so much, and she makes sure to express it whenever he gets a little too excited.
"I don't get it," Ayaka sighs, pausing to hand a customer their coffee-to-go, "Aren't you only doing this for the college funds?"
Thoma's hums, thanking a customer on their way out before turning back to his fellow employee.
"Yeah, but I intend to stay longer than college."
Ayaka can only make a face as she prepares another order. She knows that Thoma likes the job, but staying after college? Especially when he's studying for something like a degree in psychology. It's completely different from a job in a coffee shop, and Ayaka will never get why he chooses to stay here instead.
The thought is quickly dismissed once another customer enters, and Ayaka recognises them.
"Lumine!"
You see, maybe working here isn't so bad. Not when your girlfriend is a regular and likes working in the shop itself. Ayaka sends her a small wave, and flushes when Lumine responds with a wink and a smile.
"Hi, Lumine. The usual?" Thoma asks, rolling his eyes at Ayaka's smitten-ness. As much he loves the two, sometimes they can be a bit... maternal.
"Yup, don't forget the treat for Paimon."
Thoma nods as he punches in her order, reaching over the counter to give Lumine's cat a quick head pat. She purrs under his touch, her soft white fur ruffling as she relaxes into her little carrier bag.
"So, found anyone hot to get with yet?"
"Lumine, for the hundredth time, no."
"Oh come on," Lumine sighs, pulling out her purse, "You're always whining about being lonely and single, but I never see you actually try and find a boyfriend."
Lumine is...right, as much as Thoma doesn't want to admit it. He does feel lonely and single, and he does very much want boyfriend, but men are...hard. It's either they're straight, taken, or not Thoma's type. But he gets what she means when she says he's not looking hard enough. He spends most days either in his dorm, or here at work, and it's no wonder Thoma's still single.
"I'm...holding out for the right guy."
"It's 'holding out for a hero', how dare you disrespect Fairy Godmother!"
"Did you go through the Shrek trilogy again last night?"
"Don't question my hobbies."
They share a laugh as Lumine pays. She heads to her usual corner of the cafe, not before giving Ayaka a sneaky kiss on the cheek on her way there. Thoma smiles at the gesture. He's always loved how affectionate the couple is, ever since they met 11 months ago, right here in this cafe. It makes him happy that his friends are happy, but it's always had a bad aftertaste.
Thoma would be lying if he says he isn't a little envious of the two. They got together so quick, and that bond they had has never wavered, and Thoma wonders if he'd ever have something as perfect, as strong as what Ayaka and Lumine have.
A ring from the bell above the door startles Thoma to reality as another customer walks in.
Right, he's still at work.
Not that he hates the job, he loves it. He loves the place, the work, the people, it's practically perfect for Thoma. He likes cooking and is generally good with people, so what's better than this? It's just that, as Lumine mentioned earlier, he's very much single, and he thinks maybe this job is playing a part in keeping him single.
Another shift goes by of serving customers, and watching Lumine flirt with Ayaka from across the room. Just an average, uneventful day for Thoma. He takes off his apron, clocking out for the day as he heads to his dorm in a cab.
"Hey Thoma!"
Thoma turns to the voice in the dorm's hallway, waving as he spots his friend Ayato, Ayaka's older brother. He's a handsome guy, on the taller side. He works out, and Thoma's seen him do it. It's hot. But Ayato is aro-ace, and is really not interested in dating of any kind. A little embarrassing, since Thoma did used to have a massive crush on the guy.
"Hey, you up for a party later? It's gonna be at Itto's place at 8."
Itto was a good choice too. Nice, funny, good looking, fucking ripped as hell. But he's dating Gorou. Two years and counting, Thoma admires it.
"Oh, maybe next time? I plan to do some studying, maybe clean my room a little."
"Ah, ok then. Hope you're doing good, Thoma. See ya!"
With a small wave goodbye, Ayato disappears around the corner of the hall, leaving Thoma alone... again. He sighs, turning back to his room door. He fumbles with the keys, slowly unlocking the door as he steps into his room.
It's... nice. Not quite what he wants for a room, but it has the essentials and isn't a mess. Thoma lied through his teeth. He's not studying, he already did this morning, and he's not cleaning his room, it's already clean. Instead, Thoma flops onto his bed, the frame creaking under his weight.
The sheets are cold, and he hates that they are. Maybe if Thoma wasn't sulking right now, he'd be dancing with a hot boy at Itto's party, but no, he's on his bed, staring out the window, like the sad, single man that he is.
Thoma looks out at the cityscape, and he wonders if there's someone out there for him. If fate is real, he imagines that they're playing a sick joke on him right now. If they're not, then maybe Thoma really isn't trying hard enough. He wants to, he really does. He wants to be at that party, dancing and drinking, maybe kiss a few guys. But sometimes just want isn't enough.
As the night grows old, Thoma hasn't moved too much from his bed, but still isn't asleep. With the thoughts of potential boyfriends in his mind, Thoma finds himself daydreaming of his perfect guy and what they'd do together.
Dates, so many dates. Dates in a park, in an art museum, at a theme park, by the beach. Thoma imagines an attractive, taller man with him, holding his hand, hugging him, kissing him, touching him...
Great, now he's horny.
It doesn't take him long to deal with it, not with Thoma's vivid imagination. He pictures the guy undressing, naked and in all sorts of positions as he touches himself. It's odd, since this isn't any guy at all, just a faceless entity that Thoma imagines fucking him senseless.
He comes, and it feels good for a solid 30 seconds before Thoma realises that this is... really sad.
He could've at least looked up some porn, but no, he just masturbated to the thought of some sexy, nameless guy he's never met. Thoma really feels desperate in that moment, but figures it's something that'll go away tomorrow. So, he takes a shower and heads to bed, keeping any thought of the faceless hot guy out of his mind.
===
So, he was wrong about it being a one-time thing.
Everyday since then, he's felt a little worse than the day before. And everyday he passes by some mildly attractive guy on the streets or on campus, and he adds an aspect of them onto the imaginary guy he's been masturbating to, which he named "Mr. Right". It's cliché but hey, it's fitting.
"Mr. Right" is now a tall, well-built guy with multiple piercings. His hands are rugged and veiny, and fit around Thoma's waist perfectly. He also has a deep, gravelly voice, one that sends a shiver up Thoma's spine with just a whisper.
It's a shame that he probably isn't out there, or that the chances of Thoma actually meeting a guy like that are extremely low.
As he clocks in to his shift at the cafe, Thoma waves to Ayaka, who's shift starts a little earlier than his.
"Hey Thoma. You look... tired."
"Oh." Has Thoma been losing sleep over Mr. Right? He hasn't noticed, but if it's gotten so bad that Ayaka can physically see it, maybe Thoma really needs a boyfriend now.
"Just some late-night studying."
Thoma puts on his apron and starts another day of greeting customers. Most are regular patrons, just a handful of people looking for convenient to-go place. It all sort of blurs together for Thoma, since he's done this hundreds of times for the past year or so.
Things only start sticking when Lumine walks in, Paimon in her little bag as usual.
"Hey Lumine. So, what movies did you binge this time?"
Thoma laughs when he hears a groan from Lumine. He keys in Lumine's usual order and pets Paimon again. It's muscle memory by now.
"Look, I don't binge every day, y'know... but it was High School Musical."
"Classic. Perfection, except that Disney was too scared to make Chad and Ryan canon."
"I know right??? They totally fucked after that baseball song."
They share another laugh as Thoma watches Lumine kiss Ayaka again and head to her spot. It's a wonder that Lumine never forgets to kiss her girlfriend, and Thoma starts wondering if they've ever formally discussed that Lumine would do that, or is it just by habit. He assumes it's habit, a very sweet one at that. He thinks that if there ever was a day that Ayaka didn't show for work, Lumine would still end up pausing by the counter, just to imagine her girlfriend there.
The bell on the door rings again and Thoma is brought out of his head.
"Hi, what can I get for you... Diluc?"
Thoma is stunned when he sees his new customer. The man's red, wavy hair is in a high ponytail, paired with a black turtle neck, beige coat and trousers, and matching black shoes. But the most surprising part is that Thoma recognises him.
"Thoma? From high school?"
Yes, yes Thoma remembers now. Diluc Ragnvindr, his first friend from freshman year of high school. The handsome, red head boy he sat next to in homeroom. If Thoma's honest, Diluc was probably his first ever boy crush, and is probably the reason he even realised he was gay.
"Yeah! Uhm, wow," Thoma says, still a little stunned. "It's been so long. How have you been?"
Thoma scans Diluc a little more now that he's calmed down. Diluc grew his hair out, a lot, and he even has a few piercings in his ear, a couple going trough his left eyebrow and one in his bottom lip. He's gotten taller too, now at least a one or two inches above Thoma. His shoulders are broad, and Thoma can tell he's been working out, but his waist is tiny, and Thoma honestly thinks it's smaller than his.
"I've been well. Working on a business degree, but I have a day off today, so I decided to wander the city a little."
"Ah, well that's good. It's great around this area. My campus is just up the street. There's a great library there, since you like to read and all."
"You... remember I like to read?"
Thoma flushes, because he probably remembers more. He doesn't know if he should punch himself, or be impressed he recalls anything from high school.
"Yeah, uhm, sorry, what would you like to have again?"
"Oh, just a mocha to-go... actually, no, when does your shift end?."
Fuck, now Thoma's really blushing, and he prays to whatever deity that Diluc doesn't notice. Is this a date thing? Is this how people flirt? Or is it platonic? Thoma doesn't know.
"Uhm, soon, actually. In less than an hour."
"Hm, then I'll have an earl grey here. I'd like to reconnect a little after your shift."
The rest of Thoma's work day couldn't have gone any slower. It was an agonising 50 minutes, taking orders and serving customers. The only part where time seemed to go back to normal was when he and Ayaka switched places, his co-worker giving him a knowing grin as he brought Diluc his tea.
"30 minutes left," Thoma said, placing the cup and saucer in front of Diluc. The man reached for the cup, and Thoma noticed the veins in his hands, probably a side effect from working out.
"Hope it goes well then."
As the clock hits 5pm, Thoma greets the workers for the next shift with a smile, and rushes into the staff room. He practically rips off the apron, hanging it by his locker as he gathers his belongings. It's nothing more than a hoodie, which he slips on, a laptop bag and his phone.
"Excited, are we?"
Thoma turns to see Ayaka by the door, her shift ending as well. She has an amused grin on her face, her arms crossed as she walks in.
"He's just an old friend of mine."
"Never said anything about a guy," Ayaka laughs, opening her locker. "Anyway, I know flirting when I see it. He's hot, and apparently you know him already, so I say go for it."
"It's been 6 years, Ayaka. I can't just immediately ask him out. I don't even know if he likes men!"
Ayaka waves him off, muttering something about someone staring. And with that, Thoma exits the staff room to find Diluc no longer at his table. Rather, Thoma walks out the cafe to find him waiting outside, scrolling through something on his phone.
"Ah, you're here." Diluc pockets away his phone as he approaches Thoma. He has a small smile, which Thoma finds rather new. Diluc was never a smiley kid, he was always that quiet, kinda emo kid who still somehow got the best grades in class. So, to see such a friendly smile on him is unfamiliar, but it gives Thoma butterflies anyway.
"Yeah... So, where did you wanna go? The library?"
"No, maybe some other time. Not much of a place to talk in."
"Right..."
Thoma looks around, wracking his brain for some place nice. Maybe the local park? No too many kids on weekdays. The theme park sounds nice, but they'll be too focused on the games, not actually talking. Maybe the museum? No that sounds like a date. Definitely not the beach, that really is too intimate.
"We could just go for a stroll around the city? How does that sound?"
Diluc tilts his head, his crimson eyes peering at Thoma as he waits for a response.
"Yeah, that sounds nice. I'd like that."
===
"Look, I swear I only cheated off you once, and in my defence, you got it wrong anyway."
Diluc laughs at the memory, his hands buried deep in his coat pockets as they walk around the concrete sidewalks of the city. It's a little cold, nearing the end of autumn as winter creeps around the corner. The ground is a little wet from a light shower earlier in the afternoon, and Thoma has to make sure he doesn't slip on anything.
"Still, it was your fault we got detention together," Diluc says, eyes scanning the buildings around them. It's a beautiful evening, with the bright neon lights of colourful adverts reflecting off wet surfaces, soft music played by some street performers behind them, and just the general bustle of city life.
Thoma's mesmerised as well. He's lived in the city for about 5 years now, but something about tonight makes him appreciate the beauty of it all just a little more.
"It's getting late."
Thoma turns to Diluc, who's still engrossed in the city scene. The lights make his eyes shine, the light breeze ruffling his long hair. Thoma realises in that moment that the small crush he had in freshman year hasn't gone away, but is instead in front of him, all grown up and still as beautiful.
"Yeah, it's been fun, Diluc."
"I was actually wondering if you'd like to have dinner with me. It's alright if you have other plans tonight."
Well, Thoma did tell Ayato he'd consider going to a party with him, but there's always at least 2 parties a week over here.
"No, no, I'm free tonight. Dinner sounds great!"
"Alright then," Diluc smiles, turning back the way they came, "I saw a great restaurant on our way here. I've been meaning to try it for a while now."
Turns out the restaurant Diluc referred to is super fancy, and Thoma feels out of place even looking at it. It's filled to the brim with rich, fancy people in suits and silk dresses, and Thoma suddenly feels underdressed in his hoodie and jeans. Diluc, on the other hand, doesn't bat an eye at the gaudy appearance of the place, as if he's used to it already.
"Table for two please, thank you."
Thoma eyes the hostess that Diluc spoke to, her dress monochrome and tight-fitting. It's exactly what Thoma expects the staff would wear here, but he's not exactly in a position to judge, seeing as his sneakers are partially dipped in rainwater.
She leads them to booth by the window, the glass stretching from the ceiling to the floor, light from the giant chandelier reflecting off the surface. She hands them menus and leaves, the sound of her heels clicking fading off as they're left to decide on dishes.
"Uhm, just so you know, I don't think I can afford anything on here," Thoma whispers, scanning over the ridiculously pricey menu in front of them. $20 for spaghetti? That's the most Thoma's ever seen for something that's basically glorified noodles and ketchup.
"Oh that's fine, I'll be paying."
"What? That's insane. I don't remember you being this loaded."
Diluc chuckles, turning his menu over towards Thoma.
"See that?" He points at an item labelled 'Ragnvindr Dandelion Wine'. Thoma's heard of it. It's a pretty recent brand, but it's already being regarded as one of the best wines around...
Oh.
"You... own that?!" Thoma almost spits out the tacky lemon water he's been sipping. Somehow, he's never bothered piecing together why he recognised the brand name, but now it all makes sense.
"Oh no, my father does. He says I'll be set to take over his position after I graduate. Ironic, since I don't drink alcohol myself."
Diluc flips the menu back to himself, turning the page over to look at something other than wine. Thoma is still processing the sudden info, but he continues browsing the menu anyway.
It's all absurdly expensive, and Thoma being a college student with a crazy amount of debt means that he would feel guilty ordering anything off these pages. They look good, and most of the descriptions sound amazing, so Thoma tries reassuring himself that it's not everyday you'd get to have dinner with a rich winery owner's son...
It's not helping, and Diluc seems to notice.
"If you don't like it here, we can go somewhere else."
"No, no, it's fine. I'm just... are you sure I don't have to pay you back or anything?"
"I'm sure. Order anything you'd like," Diluc says with a smile. Though it's a very rich person thing to say, Thoma finds the gesture quite sweet. It doesn't keep him from worrying about the price, but at least he's able to pick out his dish.
After the waiter takes their orders, silence surrounds Thoma and Diluc, just the occasional clink of ice from their cups. Diluc swirls his water, similar to how someone would swirl their alcohol. Thoma guesses it's something he picked up from the wine industry.
"So, Thoma, what are you majoring in?"
"Ah, I'm taking psychology. Mostly cause I like people, and everyone's told me I'm good at dealing with people, so why not?"
"Do you like it so far?"
"Yeah, it's pretty interesting. It's just the math that bothers me, but once your past that, psychology's kinda neat."
Diluc hums, taking a sip from his cup. God, he even drinks it like it's wine. It's kinda hot. Thoma feels the heat rise to his cheeks and drinks his water as well, fingers playing with the string of his hoodie.
"So... how's your brother? Kaeya, was it?"
"Ah," Diluc sighs, glancing out the window and into the dark city. The sun had fully set, making the neon lights shine even brighter.
"He joined the military a while back. I considered joining as well, but eventually decided that college was better. I hear from him occasionally, but not as much anymore. Not after I finished high school. Though, I'm surprised you still remember him."
"Oh, I'm just... good at remembering things about people."
"No wonder you're taking psychology."
They share a laugh, and Thoma sinks into the soft cushion of their booth, relaxing a as he continues to chat with Diluc. He forgets that they're in an expensive, extravagant restaurant, and rather focuses on the fact that he's having dinner with an old friend.
One that he frankly misses a lot.
Thoma remembers when he was a freshman, and he was immediately labelled as the nice kid on the first day. No one expected him to become best friends with the quiet, emo kid, but him and Diluc were inseparable. They'd eat together, do projects together, walk home together, it was the best year of school Thoma ever had. He also remembers crying when he had to move away. He'd never seen Diluc cry before Thoma had to leave, but he remembers Diluc sobbing into his embrace on the last day of freshman year.
As their food arrives, the two continue to talk. Thoma gets a few looks for trying to talk with his mouth full, but it's worth it when he sees Diluc laughing at his expression. The food is great though, and Thoma can sort of understand the price, but it's still way too high, no matter how good this spaghetti is.
"Yeah! And it's even crazier because apparently beetle fighting is an actual competitive thing? Like, what? Screw college, I'm getting paid to watch bugs fight-"
Diluc chuckles into his napkin as he wipes his mouth, finishing his food just after Thoma. Despite Thoma's uneasiness when they first entered, he's really enjoying himself here. He thinks it's because it's Diluc, and he's relieved that their chemistry hasn't grown any weaker over the years.
Diluc downs the rest of his water as he calls the waiter for the bill. Thoma can only imagine what the total will be, but decides not to think too hard about it. Diluc fishes out a jet-black credit card from his wallet and hands it over as the waiter leaves to handle the payment.
"If you don't mind me prying, Thoma," Diluc starts, clearing his throat, "but are you seeing anyone as of now?"
If Thoma's heart rate could increase any further, he swears he'd need to be sent to a hospital.
"Oh, uhm, no- I mean- yeah no, I'm single right now, yeah," Thoma manages to blurt out, averting his gaze out the window. It doesn't help though, because he can still see Diluc's reflection in the window.
"Uhm, how 'bout you?"
"Me? Well, I'm still single. I would try and find someone, but college work combined with part time work at the company? It's hard enough to even maintain friendships."
"I feel you. Don't really have time for a boyfriend with this much coursework."
"Boyfriend?"
Crap, Thoma didn't mean to come out to Diluc this soon, but the same time, he doesn't know if this would be the last time they'll see each other in a long time, so he decides to just go with it.
"Yeah, I'm gay. I like men, a lot."
"Hm, I'm pansexual myself. I like to think my love is never bound to specifics such as gender, but I do find myself leaning towards the masculine types."
"That's... so cool. Really! It's so interesting to hear about how people identify and feel about themselves and others. I just think it's such a complex, human thing to do, and it's just so beautiful and fascinating to me. I just wish more people could see it like I do."
Diluc smiles as he collects his card from the waiter, sliding it in his wallet.
"I do too."
===
"Do you have a ride home, Thoma?"
"Ah yeah, I'll just call a cab."
Thoma shivers from the change of temperature, from the warm restaurant to the chilling breeze of the outside. He's about to hail a cab, but Diluc places a hand on his shoulder.
"I can get my driver to make a detour to your dorm. He's on his way here anyway."
At this point, Thoma isn't surprised that Diluc has a personal driver. It's some classic rich people shit, and he'd be lying if he says he doesn't want to experience it.
"Fine, but you're being too nice, Diluc."
"Can't a man be nice to an old friend?"
When the driver pulls up in front of the restaurant, Thoma doesn't even register that the car is theirs. It's a sleek, black, and longer than most cars.
'A mini limo', Thoma thinks, 'I don't know cars.'
They slide into the backseat, which is rather spacious. The seats are soft and heated, making Thoma practically melt into it. Ok, being stupid rich is becoming too enticing. Thoma can only wish to have something like this in his car, well, metaphorical car. He doesn't have one yet.
The drive to Thoma's dorm is rather quiet, save for the times that he has to give directions to the driver. He watches as Diluc looks idly out the window, flashes of neon city lights whizzing past them. His fingers toying with a necklace he wears, hidden under his turtleneck. It's oddly familiar, and Thoma finally puts it together when it slides out, revealing a silver fire symbol.
"You... kept our necklace?"
Diluc snaps back to reality, looking down as he realises he's pulled the necklace out.
"Oh, yeah, I wear it everyday, actually."
"That's so cheesy," Thoma sneers. He swears he sees a little red in Diluc's face, but dismisses it as the lights.
"Nah I'm kidding, I kept it too!"
Thoma untucks the chain necklace from under his hoodie, grinning as he shows it off. He remembers getting it for Diluc before he was supposed moved, just so they had something to remember each other by. He'd never expected Diluc to have kept it, let alone wear everyday.
The car slows to a stop in front of Thoma's campus as Thoma gathers his belongings. He steps out of the car, turning back to say goodbye. But Diluc isn't in the car, rather, he's holding the door open as he steps out as well.
"Wait-"
Before Thoma could process it, he's engulfed in a warm hug. Diluc's arms wrap around him, his head resting against Thoma's shoulder.
"I missed you."
Thoma smiles, wrapping his arms around Diluc as he similarly buries his head into Diluc's clavicle. He smells like cinnamon, and also a tinge of wine.
"I missed you too."
===
Thoma watches as the car drives off with Diluc in it, not before waiting for Thoma to enter his dorm entrance. He doesn't take his eyes off it until it rounds the corner, disappearing from Thoma's line of sight.
He makes his way to his dorm, unlocking the door as he tosses his bag to the side. Thoma locks the door behind him before flopping onto his bed. It's a familiar position, one that he's been in most night before.
Thoma thinks back to today's events. A surprise reunion, a stroll in the city, a dinner with Diluc, Diluc catching up with him, Diluc's voice, his piercings, his hands, his...body...
No, no Thoma's not doing this tonight. He can't, not when he actually knows the person. It's just going to make things weird... but it's not going to fix the problem he has right now.
Back to 'Mr. Right' it is.
The first 20 seconds goes well, Thoma is able to stick to the image of a faceless man sucking him off, but things start derailing once he imagines himself grabbing a fistful of hair.
It's red.
He tries dismissing the thought, but the more he imagines, the more he realises that his "Mr. Right" is just Diluc. The piercings, the hands, the body, everything. And very quickly does the faceless man gain a face and a new name.
"Fuck... oh my god, Diluc... mmh, Diluc-"
Thoma comes, and it feels good, no, fantastic, for about 30 seconds.
Then he feels bad, so incredibly bad. It's the worse he's felt the past days, and he thinks he's going insane. But he decides that he'll forget it in the morning, so he takes a shower and heads to bed, trying his best to forget what he did.
Spoilers, it doesn't work.