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Skrillex has had enough to drink and smoke that he's not at all afraid to take this ridiculous human virility challenge. He's seen a few videos on YouTube and it seems simple enough: he must demonstrate his virility to potential mates by dousing his body in ice water, and it must be documented. He is then to challenge some other human males to prove their virility in the same way. The ritual seems redundant; he already has the most attractive female this planet has to offer taking his knot. But he has been challenged, so he must go through with it. Compared to the mating rituals back home, this is ridiculously easy: he doesn't even have to climb anything or sing.
Some identical females line up behind him and his human friends, holding buckets of ice water. Skrillex slows his heart rate, opening his gills wide and discreetly sliding his nictitating membranes shut in preparation, and his human friends prepare their bodies in whatever way they can. He removes his glasses and sits calmly as he and his friends issue the virility challenge to other human males in their tribe.
Then comes the water, and what happens next is entirely unexpected. He allows it to flow over his body, wetting his hair and clothing, but his human friends yelp in shock. How odd. They did know that the water would be cold, did they not? This is known, after all, as the Ice Bucket Challenge. He worries for them, but as his preening reflex kicks in he finds himself entirely unable to assist them. He must approach the camera. Even though he is happily mated, he must display, especially as his lek has spectacularly failed in displaying their virility. If they expect to mate it is up to him to demonstrate their fitness as a group. His gills close but his membranes stay shut as water continues to drip down. He discreetly runs a hand over his body, drawing as much attention as possible to its strength and beauty. At least if he manages to excite any potential mates, the other males in his lek may be able to capitalize on that for themselves.
Later that day, as is his custom, he checks the comments:
Paris Hilton? You've gotta be fucking kidding me, I thought Ritchie was better than that.
Paris is a lovely, fun-loving human who has treated him with nothing but respect since they have known each other. He wonders why humans are always so very quick to judge one another, but they are probably simply jealous of her vast wealth.
i dont understand isnt the whole point to raise awareness, he didnt even mention als wtf. fuck skrillex, what a bitch
Skrillex has no idea what an ALS is or why he should be raising awareness about it. He googles and what he finds horrifies him and makes his blood run cold. Skrillex slowly feels very queasy as he realizes that this wasn't a virility challenge at all. The whole idea of this challenge was to raise awareness of the existence of this human sickness. As he reads over the symptoms, tears prick at his eyes and he shuts his membranes again so as not to worry anyone.
An ALS is something that affects humans from time to time. It makes them very, very sick, he discovers. Their muscles slowly waste away until they can't even move. Humans aren't very strong to begin with, and he can't imagine what it would be like not to be able to run, jump, skip, sing to attract mates. And apparently many humans don't even know that the ALS afflicts members of their species. Skrillex's gorge rises and he swallows it down. He pulls out his phone, needing to hear his mate's voice immediately.
"Babe?" He removes his glasses and wipes at his eyes. "Babe, I think I really fucked up..."