Chapter Text
8 months later…
Jana handed over her clearing papers to the lady at the desk, one more step in her transition out of the military. As she waited for her paperwork to be verified, her mind was running a million miles a minute. She had decided a few months ago that she would get out. She had gone as far as she wanted in her military career and she wanted to pursue other things – mainly to start her PhD. As she had already worked through her bachelors and her masters in psychology, she wanted to focus on her future. She wanted to help others who were going through what she had gone through, and the best way was to become a clinical psychologist. She had applied to Baylor University, as they have a behavioral neuroscience doctoral program and by some miracle she had been accepted. She was so excited to start this new chapter in her life and could hardly wait to leave Alabama.
Things with Michael were also going very good, she thought to herself with a small smile. He had been coming in at least once a month – sometimes twice – and she had flown to Los Angeles to be with him a few times as well. They made it work somehow. They Skyped, they texted, they called and emailed multiple times a day. She didn’t think it was possible, but she fell more and more in love with him every day. He simply amazed her and she was so grateful for the relationship she had with him. How her new future would play out with Michael she did not know, and if she were to be honest, it did worry her a bit. She knew how rigorous the doctoral program would be, and the time constraints it would place on her. Michael was completely behind her though, knowing that this was her dream, the same as acting was his. They would figure it out somehow he told her.
The woman handed the papers back to her, and Jana looked them over carefully. “That’s it, ma’am. Enjoy your retirement.” She told Jana with a warm smile.
“Oh I am doing the early retirement thing...” Jana said hastily.
“Either way, you’ve done your time ma’am. What have you got planned for the future?” Jana smiled shyly, not sure how to proceed.
“Well, I am actually going back to school. Baylor to be exact.”
“Oh a Texas girl huh?” The woman laughed.
“Oh yes ma’am. Can’t wait to get back.” She really was excited to get back to Texas, although she dearly loved this part of Alabama.
“Well, like I said. Enjoy yourself. You are still young and have the whole world ahead of you. I wish you luck, young lady.”
“Ok thank you again.” Jana quickly stuffed all her paperwork in her bag, and headed out to her truck.
That was it, she thought, as she sat in her truck in a daze. She was cleared. The end of this month and she would be fully out of the Army for good. She was a little terrified if she were to be honest. The Army was all she had known for so many years. It was reliable, it was consistent, and it was safe for the most part. She thought back to many years ago when she had first made the decision to join, right out of high school. She knew now that she was trying to escape her past and took the quickest plane out of town – the Army. Just like that she was removed from the situation. Almost 15 years in and it was all coming to an end. For some stupid reason she felt like she was going to cry. What the fuck? She swiped at her eyes, feeling the tears pricking at her eyes.
This was a good thing, Sears! No, not Sears anymore, she reminded herself – it would be Jana now. No more last names for her. She sniffled again, feeling silly, as she texted Michael.
Jana: It’s done. I am a civilian now.
She sat there waiting for some time, hoping he would not be busy and could text her back. She really needed him right now. Finally her phone buzzed in her hand.
Michael: How do you feel? I love you..
Jana: I don’t know. Stressed out. Is that stupid? I love you more
Michael: No baby, not stupid. Been doing this for so long. Transition. I am sure I love you more
Jana: You’re busy right now, aren’t you? I swear I love you more than you love me
Michael: Yeah. Been shooting all day. Nothing’s going right. I thought you weren’t going to swear anymore? I’ll show you that I love you more than you love me
Jana: Ok I’ll let you go. Call me later? Can we agree to love each other the same?
Michael: Right. Will call you later. We can agree but I do love you more
Jana smiled down at her phone before shutting it off. She dropped it in the cupholder before putting the keys in the ignition and starting up her truck. She needed to get home and get stuff packed up. She had less than a month to be cleared out of her house and it was moving way too fast for her liking.