Chapter Text
“He love me… He loves me not…”
Kurogiri ignores Tomura as he turns another petal into dust. And then the rose. Then some minion’s head.
When he tries to destroy one of his cups, Kurogiri believes enough is enough and teleports his hands to empty space. “This behavior has been going on for weeks, Tomura. What is this tantrum even about? Sensei is not mad that the USJ plan-”
Kurogiri recoils back when the young man slammed himself onto the counter and flapped around aggressively, effectively spreading dust on every part of the freshly polished surface.
Of course, Tomura didn’t give a flying flip about that. “It’s that stupid NPC! No matter how hard I try, I can’t get him out of my head!” He wailed, adding blood stains to the dust as he scratched his neck. Kurogiri, being the good bartender he is, pushes his young master off and immediately began scrubbing the counter. Tomura continued throwing his bitchfit to the floor.
“Why were his eyes big and worried when he saved me? His hands too, they strong and scarred but so soft…fuck!” He began to cradle his favorite hand to his face. “Father, help me!” Father of course, didn’t speak, so Kurogiri decided to take pity on the served hand and step in instead.
“While it is natural to develop gratitude for someone that saves you from death, you shouldn’t let it go to the extreme. Especially if that person is on the opposing side.”
“But he’s cute!” the young man whines, like that gave any justification. Beverage coasters are cute, yet Tomura destroyed twenty-six of them yesterday. “He’s cute and he saved me and I want him but he likes All M-Mi-.” It was physically impossible for Tomura to say ‘like’ and ‘All Might’ in the same sentence, so the pale-haired man just lies there making dying seal noises. Kurogiri, being the master at ignoring things, pretends he doesn’t notice.
“Tomura, even if you do fancy him, are you going to abandon your goal and go pursue him? What would Sensei say?” The screen near the bar flickers, and lo and behold, Sensei appears. Shigaraki immediately runs to the screen. Finally, Kurogiri can go back to cleaning again. He doesn’t need to listen because he already knows how this conversation will end. His master will ask what’s wrong, Tomura will scream and wail over his frustrations. All For One will patiently listen and his protégée will ask what to do. Being the intelligent man he is, All for One will tell the young master that he should pursue his feelings with young Midoriya-
Kurogiri drops the glass he was cleaning, but manages to save it just in time.
“…Pardon?” He was sure he heard wrong. There is no possible way the man would agree to this.
“I seem no harm in this. Tomura is loyal to his ambitions, and to gain support from others is always beneficial. All is fair in love and war, after all.”
Tomura is ecstatic. So ecstatic in fact, that he cuts even deeper into his neck. But who cares! Sensei thinks it’s a great side quest! How it would be good to have another heavy arsenal on their team! The despair it would cause All-Might if one of his students became a villain! He wouldn’t be roped with those other losers that played video games in their parent’s basement anymore!
As the young man continues to gouge out his own neck in victory, Kurogiri tries to reason with his master. “Sensei, surely you know how…disastrous this will turn out.”
“I appreciate the concern Kurogiri, but you know that everything I do is for Tomura’s sake. Tomura is a young man in love. Thus, we can only help him with his pursuits. I know you won’t fail me.” With that, the screen blacks out.
Kurogiri stares at the empty screen and sighs. Then he pulls out a bottle of the strongest liquor they have and starts chugging it down. If he can’t beat them, he might as well get on their level of craziness to enjoy the ride.
Unfortunately all he gets is a killer hangover that last for weeks. In his agony, he misses that Tomura has begun taking his quest for love to serious levels. He has read every article of love he can get his hands on, threatens everyone he comes across for advise, and has spent hours playing romance gaming. His excitement and dedication to winning the hero’s heart almost rivals that off his dream to kill All Might, and yet he has never seen the young man so nervous in trying to do so. It could have been considered almost cute if Tomura wasn’t well…Tomura. And if the little shit didn’t mess up his beautiful bar with his nervous frustrations.
Kurogiri grabbed a broom and marched over to the young master’s room. Lovesick or not, Tomura was going to clean up his mess this time around.
Tomura hated that love was more complicated than he though. Why couldn’t he just kill the dragon and get the princess? It was so annoying. But when he catches sight of his freckled angel at the Sports Festival on TV, his heart flutters and he smiles so wide he taste blood.
“Remember to watch the other contestants as well, Tomura.” Sensei gently reminds him, and Tomura waves him off.
“I know, I know.” He grumbles, but it’s kind of hard to do so. They’re not as interesting as his Izukun. They don’t win races without using their quirk and break out of mind control with sheer willpower. They don’t take Tomura’s breathe away like Izukun does when he keeps on breaking and fingers and then keeps on breaking them, just to help his opponent out.
(Just like he did at USJ, eyes filled with pain and tears but focused on him with such intensity. “Don’t let go! I’ve got you!” he yells with a wobbly smile even as Tomura’s fingers continue to crumble away his skin and flesh, even though it would be easier to let go and let Tomura fall and fall…)
Tomura hates them. He doesn’t like how that girl clings to the teen and makes him flustered instead of him. He doesn’t like how purple baggy-eyes orders him around because when he should be the only one controlling Izukun. And Tomura really, REALLY doesn’t like that Izukun breaks his fingers for Endeavor’s son, because that bastard doesn’t deserve Izuku’s kindness. Izukun’s kindness is only meant for him!
The curly-haired teen is out of the tournament and Tomura wants to disintegrate the TV, but he can’t since he has to watch these noobs and learn their weaknesses so he can kill them later. So the young man sits there and disintegrating his bowl of popcorn, grinding his teeth because he really hates them.
The one that won the contest seems to hate them too, and Tomura laughs when the blonde won’t accept that stupid award from All Might, because he probably knows that it’s just a feeble distraction from the literal and figurative chains he’s wrapped in.
He would make a good addition to the team. And maybe help with making Izuku join the league as well. Izuku would probably be happy to have a friend here or something. But that would probably take a while and Tomura wants Izukun by his side now. What else could Tomura give to make his little hero like him? A lot of websites he read from love guru’s said to make it special and meaningful, but even with all the stalking he’s done, Tomura doesn’t really know Izukun that well. And they said if you want someone to like you back you have to listen to them and hang out with them to know them better. But in order to get a date to know them better you have to show them that you care about them by giving them gifts. Which just leads him into a glitch!
He tried to tell Kurogiri his problem, but the irritable man wouldn’t even listen to him unless the made the bar spotless! Any other day Tomura would have disorganized the alphabetized bottles and disintegrate his ties just to be petty, but he was desperate.
“This better be some damn good advice or I will kill you.” Tomura growls and sloshes water on the floor, purposely spilling some over Kurogiri’s polished shoes. Kurogiri gives him the stink eyes and the young man responds by sticking out his tongue but realizes too late that he just accidently licks his father instead. The wispy man watches in amusement as Tomura shrieks apologies to the hand.
“I would say get the boy something he would like, but he’s seems to be quite into hero merchandise and so that’s out of the question.” Which is a true statement. The last time they were dragged into a hero shop, Tomura woke up naked and stapled to a wall by All-Might posters, armadillos were trying to eat Kurogiri’s left shoe, and many buildings were on fire.
“I suggest giving something that lets him know you are thinking of him. Secret admirers and such often leave gifts with messages acknowledging their love.” Kurogiri rescrubbed a shot in thought. “Perhaps, make the gift hand-made? That usually shows the person that you care about the greatly, and makes the gift more special.”
Overall it was pretty shitty advice, but Kurogiri said the magic words: hand-made. And just like that, an idea popped into Tomura’s mind that was so perfect he began dancing with the mop. Of course! Why didn’t he think of this sooner? He could have kissed the bartender in happiness, but they both know Kurogiri would have literally punched him to the moon, consequences be damned. Kurogiri takes his relationships very seriously.
“Let’s go Kurogiri.” He barks at the man with a smile that would make children cry. “We have some shopping to do.”