witblogi
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“I want to say I know what you’re doing, and it’s attempting to give yourself a sensible and proactive rectal exam, but I’m compelled with shock to tell you this looks very sexual.”
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The Prophylactic Deactivation Complication by witblogi
Fandoms: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
07 Mar 2021
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“Then we’ll have to conduct an experiment. A trial basis upon which after we can assess if it was an acceptable alternative to condoms. If you or I don’t prefer it after say five sexual encounters without a barrier, we can go back to condoms as the standard and in future regarding procreation re-negotiate on a per-ovulation basis.”
“Counter offer, one sexual encounter and I will be nothing but complimentary towards your genitals regarding the whole messy affair.” He moved in that way he did when he was negotiating, a little bounce. Amy narrowed her eyes shrewdly.
“Three encounters and you tell me what you really think.” She crossed her arms across her chest.
“Three encounters, I tell you what I really think… and you wear one of your old corduroy skirts ahead of time.”
“Done.” Amy beamed up at him.
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You can travel the wor-rld, but nothing comes close to the golden coast.
5+1 times California Gurls was Chowder and Farmer’s song
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“How weird are we talking? Does he want to take pictures of your feet in women’s shoes?” Scott mumbles through a mouthful of buttercream.
“That was weirdly specific, no, it’s just... I think he has a thing. Like for weddings.” Stiles hisses at Scott, eyeing the middle aged couple two tables over who keep looking over at them warily. Scott doesn’t seem to notice them.
Series
- Part 3 of Suggestive is my Middle Name
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"...But this is a serious problem! Derek doesn’t want to facetime with my Lower Manhattan.”
“Maybe he’s just an..uh uptown kind of guy?”Series
- Part 2 of Suggestive is my Middle Name
Recent series
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- Words:
- 15,446
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 189
Recent bookmarks
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Finger Food by JenfysNest
Fandoms: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Star Wars - All Media Types
15 Dec 2019
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Rey first comes across his video purely by accident. The number of times she’s sought his videos out after that, however, is entirely intentional.
In which Ben is an awkward virgin who practices his burgeoning fingering skills on fruit and posts the videos online. Rey is obsessed with his videos and his hands.
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- English
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- 16,404
- Chapters:
- 4/4
- Comments:
- 546
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Bookmarked by witblogi
14 Nov 2021
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The Dispatch Inquiry by April in Paris (April_in_Paris)
Fandoms: The Big Bang Theory (TV), Shamy - Fandom
24 Jan 2021
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Britain, 1935. Reporter Amy Farrah Fowler is dispatched to cover a gathering of scientists at the manor house of the eccentric Lord Sheldon Cooper. But disagreements cause tensions to rise at the estate. When one of the scientists is found murdered, can Amy trust her little grey cells to crack the case? Can she trust her heart to remain objective when it comes to the suspicious Lord Cooper?
An ode to Dame Agatha Christie.
Series
- Part 1 of Medford Mysteries
Bookmarked by witblogi
12 Jan 2021
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Ninety percent of everyone's problems could be solved by a robot that just texted NO to hockey players on a regular basis. Unfortunately, Sidney didn't have a robot.
- Language:
- English
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- 9,241
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- 1/1
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- 3
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- 597
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- 5,897
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- 1,681
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- 87,276
Bookmarked by witblogi
27 Jun 2019
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It’s almost funny. All he ever wanted was to play hockey, to play in the NHL, to win the Cup. This—Samwell, the team, the Haus—was supposed to be just a detour, but now it feels more like a destination he failed to realize he’s already reached.
(Or: Jack signs with the Falconers, graduates, and leaves. It's the hardest thing he's ever done. What comes after is even harder.)
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- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 157,904
- Chapters:
- 20/20
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- 2,316
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- 5,791
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- 136,412
Bookmarked by witblogi
12 Jul 2016
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A story that chronicles the lives of our gang as teachers and students leading up to the winter holidays. Merlin and Arthur are dumb face in love as usual, but it takes them a while to get any traction. Merlin has a lot to learn and Arthur just cares too damn much. Their colleagues are fed up, the kids are okay, Merlin and Arthur can't catch a break, and everyone loves Gwen. So not much different than canon.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 37,343
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 70
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- 704
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- 209
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- 13,316
Bookmarked by witblogi
22 Jun 2015