thefunctionofarubberduck



Recent bookmarks

  1. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    In the summer before his sixth year at Hogwarts, Harry decides to take his own words to heart - it is time to let the Gryffindor go. As he tries to navigate the world with the eyes of a Slytherin, he surprises everyone with what he discovers he’s capable of.

    After all, Slytherins use any means to achieve their ends, even when they are not a fan of the means.


    The sequel to Evitative.

    Discontinued.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    107,493
    Chapters:
    17/?
    Collections:
    39
    Comments:
    6,967
    Kudos:
    36,187
    Bookmarks:
    8,003
    Hits:
    953,547

    06 May 2025

  2. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    In the summer before his fifth year at Hogwarts, Harry is drawn to a room in Grimmauld Place. Like the Gryffindor he is, he enters the room without fear. The room is a library, and Harry is surprised to find that he’s eager to learn.

    Then he gets the bad news: he’s been accidentally expelled from Hogwarts, and he needs to be sorted again. Everyone is confident that he’ll go straight back to Gryffindor, but with what he's been learning, Harry’s not so sure.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    222,453
    Chapters:
    29/29
    Collections:
    213
    Comments:
    9,011
    Kudos:
    90,912
    Bookmarks:
    24,156
    Hits:
    3,118,235

    06 May 2025

  3. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    When Harry fails to keep his anger at bay and Voldemort possesses his mind, the events that follow lead him down a long road to realizing the world isn't as black and white as it seems.

    Chaos, hilarity, and tragedy ensue with a Dark Lord being honest all the time, a rival becoming something else, and a world demanding to be saved. Featuring frightened Death Eaters, deep conversations with a monster, Pureblood traditions being ridiculous, and the fight to do the right thing with no true options.

    Harry's life just gets more and more bizarre with each passing moment.

    ~~~

    Or, the one where Harry's life gets split in half, and he has to figure out how to bring it back together.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    456,640
    Chapters:
    30/30
    Collections:
    60
    Comments:
    5,303
    Kudos:
    29,792
    Bookmarks:
    9,989
    Hits:
    1,614,848

    07 May 2025

  4. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Draco has been trapped in life so long that freedom always feels just out of reach. With the help of Harry and so many others, he learns how to get a grasp on it and never let it go.

    Featuring the pride of Slytherins, the complexities of Fathers, the weight of a name, and loving the biggest idiot in the world.

    ~~~

    Or, the one where Draco's life hasn't gone as planned for anyone, but maybe that's not such a bad thing. After all, life is full of surprises.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    124,818
    Chapters:
    6/6
    Collections:
    3
    Comments:
    561
    Kudos:
    5,514
    Bookmarks:
    1,092
    Hits:
    124,868

    07 May 2025

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
    557,263
    Works:
    4
    Bookmarks:
    5,689

    19 May 2025