ripjaw1216



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    Shane Hollander agrees to an arranged marriage because refusing could start a war. He expected a transactional relationship, minimal emotional involvement, and maybe some occasional awkward small talk.

    Instead he gets a six-foot-three stupidly attractive Russian alpha who is apparently determined to follow Shane around campus like an overprotective guard dog.

    meanwhile Ilya Rozanov was fully prepared for a spoiled, haughty omega.

    But Shane was earnest, stole his cloths, cried over his gunshot wound, and called him mine in front of his father.

    Now Ilya’s a little obsessed.

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    09 Jun 2026

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    Ilya Rozanov does what he does best: post on social media and stress out Harris Drover.

    The fic starts on New Year's Day 2024 after Ilya posts an upcoming year's "enemies" list.

    This is a series that alternates between Hockey Husbands + the rest of Centaurs team being insane on the internet, Harris putting them in media training, and it immediately failing as soon as they leave the room.

    Basically, it's just the Cens being absolute menaces!

    Series
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    29/?
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    09 Jun 2026

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    centaurs ✅

    [picture] The middle of the Ottawa-Buffalo game. In front of a net, Ilya Rozanov is on one knee on the ice, flanked by two Buffalo players, stick outstretched toward Shane Hollander who has the puck on his stick.

    CENS WIN

    OTT 5 FINAL 1 BUF

    [video, 15 seconds]

    The post-game press line, Ilya Rozanov sweaty and shirtless, a mic held in front of his face.

    ESPN reporter: Ilya, what an amazing assist in the second period power play. You were literally swiveling on one knee avoiding two defensemen, and sliding the puck to Hollander to score.

    Rozanov (grinning): Well, sometimes you have to go down on one knee for your man, you know.

    [Caption] Married life #Cens style: scoring goals with your husband!

     

    Or: During Shane's first season in Ottawa, Ilya keeps breaking the internet with his interviews and shenanigans. The internet, predictably, keeps losing its shit.

    Series
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    09 Jun 2026

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    “If I gave Jackie a day of getting to have sex with me whenever she wants as a thank you for tidying the living room, I think she’d divorce me,” Hayden says.

    “Nah, man, she’d kill you,” J. J. says, which is probably true.

    Shane shrugs. “That sounds like a straight people problem.”

    Hayden is truly glad that the times of Shane torturing himself by being in the closet are over. But. Well. This conversation is kind of making him miss those days.

    ---

    Finally, after everything, Shane is a happily married man. Incredibly happily married. It only becomes a problem once he thinks it qualifies him to dispense relationship advice.

    Or, five times Shane gives relationship advice his friends disagree with, and one time he doesn’t.

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    08 Jun 2026

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    It starts, as many things do, slowly. He quietly stops seeing Galina. He lies about taking his medication. The medication hasn’t been helping anyway. Then it’s Shane noticing he isn’t doing well, and begging Ilya to talk to him. There is nothing to say.

     

    Objectively, everything is fine. His life is amazing. He’s married to the love of his life, they play for the same hockey team, they don’t have to hide their love anymore. They have a dog and a place that is home. He has a family with Shane and his parents. He has friends with the centaurs and Svetlana. On paper, his life is amazing.

     

    The thought definitively doesn’t help the guilt he feels when he holds the handful of painkillers.

    Or: Ilya commits suicide. But when he dies, he finds himself as a ghost and is forced to watch Shane grapple with his death.

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    07 Jun 2026