qpenelope
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Summary
She’s buying a box of condoms when she meets him.
“Those are shit, you know,” he says, jerking his chin at the pale purple box in her hand. “Can’t feel anything.”
She stares at him for a moment too long. The bell above the door jingles merrily as a rowdy group of schoolboys enters the store.
“Excuse you,” she replies, cheeks turning pink.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 8,076
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 7
- Comments:
- 139
- Kudos:
- 5,952
- Bookmarks:
- 1,430
- Hits:
- 78,515
Bookmarked by qpenelope
25 Mar 2026
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Summary
It was small, slim, about the length of her hand; the leather cover was soft, the sewn-in binding was crisp, and the thick vellum pages were empty. 'Tom Marvolo Riddle' was printed in ancient, flaking gold leaf across the front.He had been a Slytherin, a prefect, and head boy in 1944.
She had checked.
[ ALTERNATIVELY - Hermione finds Tom Riddle's diary. ]- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 18,876
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 21
- Comments:
- 295
- Kudos:
- 10,569
- Bookmarks:
- 2,399
- Hits:
- 145,561
Bookmarked by qpenelope
20 Mar 2026
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It takes a Village to make a relationship--Or, at least, a bunch of over-reaching grumpy old farts, a military leader with a bit too much to drink, a nosy but well meaning kunoichi, eight ninken, and the power of youth. And a really cranky chakra monster with nine tails and a penchant for swearing.
Series
- Part 1 of Making Arrangements
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 189,984
- Chapters:
- 19/19
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 320
- Kudos:
- 3,594
- Bookmarks:
- 1,539
- Hits:
- 110,591
Bookmarked by qpenelope
04 Mar 2026
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Summary
Wherein Kakashi seems oddly dedicated to making Naruto lose her mind.
Or: Five times Kakashi makes Naruto blush, and one time she returns the favour.
Bookmarked by qpenelope
19 Feb 2026
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French Kissing, the End of the World, and Other Impossible Ordeals by Tsume_Yuki
Fandoms: Naruto
02 Mar 2020
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Summary
This is it, centuries of excellent genetics, of carefully selected marriages to maximise the potential of future generations and it’s going to be Sasuke who introduces idiocy to the Uchiha bloodline.
The ancestors must be rolling in their graves.
In which Sasuke is smitten, Naruto is a badass, and timetravel happens.
Series
- Part 1 of - by Uchiha Sasuke
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 16,194
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 19
- Comments:
- 720
- Kudos:
- 9,030
- Bookmarks:
- 2,392
- Hits:
- 184,110
Bookmarked by qpenelope
18 Feb 2026