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Saving the World, One Blowjob at a Time by professorTodd
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
11 Jan 2026
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Summary
“Of all the arrogant, self-important pricks,” Harry fumed, slamming his bookbag down on the chair next to Alphard. The only thing keeping him from shouting was the librarian’s wrath.
Alphard blinked up at him. “Who did what?”
“Tom Riddle,” Harry sneered. “Who does he think he is ordering me around, telling me what to eat and when to study? I’m eight—sixteen years old!” he amended. “He’ll be trying to issue a bloody bedtime next!”
Alphard looked confused. “Tom? I didn’t even know you knew each other.”
“He assigned himself to be my bloody mentor,” Harry grumbled. “Like I need a babysitter.”
Alphard’s mouth dropped open. “Tom is your alpha? But he’s never taken an omega before!”
Harry winced at what he was pretty sure were sex terms. “No. I’m not calling him that.”
Or
Harry goes back in time to stop everyone from dying and ends up in a weird Slytherin hierarchy and saving the world by distracting the future dark lord with sex.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 23,300
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 135
- Kudos:
- 3,488
- Bookmarks:
- 825
- Hits:
- 49,626
Bookmarked by parkkbench
01 Jul 2026
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Summary
This isn’t what Harry had in mind when he went to deface public property.
Bookmarked by parkkbench
30 Jun 2026
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Summary
Malfoy shoots him a deathly glare. “I’m going to find a way to break this.” His voice is fierce with purpose and Harry finds it hard not to believe him.
“Sure, you and Hermione both,” Harry concedes, “but until then…”
Malfoy’s lips thin, gaze dropping to his lap. His hands clench and unclench, mere inches from Harry’s own. After a while, he whispers a barely audible, “Until then.”
or
Harry and Draco are just trying to make it out of their last year at Hogwarts alive. Along the way, they find each other.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 21,363
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 123
- Kudos:
- 2,438
- Bookmarks:
- 535
- Hits:
- 33,394
Bookmarked by parkkbench
28 Jun 2026
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Summary
“Can’t believe a pretty thing like you has to come begging to the Red Hood,” he says against Tim’s neck. “Thought they’d be lining up down the block for you. Thought Daddy would need to get the shotgun.”
“You’re the one with the shotgun,” Tim points out.
++
Tim’s benched with a broken arm and starts playing Jason’s personal Oracle. Things escalate.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 31,350
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 10
- Comments:
- 636
- Kudos:
- 15,343
- Bookmarks:
- 3,752
- Hits:
- 249,428
Bookmarked by parkkbench
01 Jun 2026
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Summary
The year is 1945, and Tom Riddle has just graduated from Hogwarts. Everyone wants to know what he’ll do next.
He is going to be great.
He just has to decide what that means.
A story about choices, the things that fill your belly, and the courage it takes to be known.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 30,166
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 333
- Kudos:
- 1,657
- Bookmarks:
- 499
- Hits:
- 31,840
Bookmarked by parkkbench
19 May 2026