lindirlos
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Summary
a statue of an angel looks down on you.
you take in the sight in all his glory
but when your gaze fall to its eyes it seems…
it seems—
its eyes are locked on yours and—oh, this is what it feels like to be seen.
you fall down to your knees, head down and hands joined in prayer:
“angel, i can be your loyal servant;
i will not leave you unless you kill me,
i will not disobey unless you tell me to.
i will worship you ‘till my knees bleed."——
or: a study on the warmth of one’s heart.
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it will take one bullet to make you bleed. you will stumble on your feet because of the impact.
it will take two bullets to make you spit out blood. you will fall to your knees as a hand reaches for the wound.
it will take three bullets for death to reach you. you will close your eyes and exhale your last breath.
or maybe, it will take four bullets. or five or six or seven.how many bullets will it take for you to drop the act? or will you empty the gun, pretending to be something you are not?
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or: how to approach life when you are not a human.
Recent series
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this is what it feels like to be alive (this is what it feels like to be dying) by lindirlos
Fandom Tokyo Debunker (Video Game)
01 Nov 2025
Summary
to be alive means being able to breathe;
it means being able to experience happiness, anger, sadness and elation
it means being able to love, hate, worship and despise
it means being able to be yourself, however that may be, as long as the real you can finally come outto die means to exhale your last breath;
it means feeling only desperation, or nothing at all, as you wait for your time to come
it means leaving behind everyone you have loved and forgiving everyone who has done you wrong
it means no longer recognising yourself in the mirror and hating what you have become- Words:
- 5,751
- Works:
- 1
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Summary
Hyunjin has been at JYPE psychiatric facility for six months, and he has no intention of leaving. He's perfectly happy deflecting questions about his feelings, tonguing his meds, and sharing a singular (illegal) iPod nano with Jisung, Seungmin, and Innie. So what if he can't exactly remember chunks of his childhood, and so what if the mere notion of rejection makes him want to rip his hair out? So what if he's running out time before he's passed on to the next inpatient hospital?
Felix has been a dancer for the Poirot Ballet since he was thirteen, and he has no plans of stopping dance (or his determined path towards perfection) any time soon, no matter how much his body wants to take him out of the game. So when he's sentenced to two weeks of mandatory inpatient treatment for a supposed 'Adderall dependency', he's less than thrilled. After all, he's been nothing but a perfect, moldable, emotionless doll for years. How is he supposed to fake a sickness he doesn't have, while keeping his actual 'illness' secret?
And why does that asshole Hwang Hyunjin have to be so goddamn beautiful?