lavendercakepops



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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    when shane gets the injury that would come to end his career, in the moment he’s just thankful he didn’t break his jaw.

    or: shane knew, in the abstract, that one day he would play his last professional nhl game. it never occurred to him that hockey would choose that day for him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,427
    Chapters:
    5/5
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    20 Jun 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    When Shane Hollander looks into the future he sees— not a flat sheet of ice, not that, not anymore, but something equally as empty.

    His backup plan was always to go to university. He hadn't thought he'd ever need it, not really. Especially not near the end, when everything felt so certain. But his grades were good, his mom made sure of that, so when he woke up in the hospital he already knew what he was going to do next. But after?

    There's a standard path people take, he knows, that comes after school. But when he tries to picture it, slot himself into the picket fence and the corporate overhead fluorescents, it disappears. Like it was never going to be real at all.

    (Or: after ending up at a jazz bar to celebrate the end of finals season, Shane Hollander finds himself where he never thought he'd be— in the orbit of NHL superstar Ilya Rozanov.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    59,204
    Chapters:
    7/10
    Collections:
    1
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    2,018
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    4,421
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    2,238
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    142,138

    15 Jun 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya Rozanov has been drafted by Boston, the number one pick overall, but his father doesn't want him moving to America and so takes steps to block his visa. He's going to have to go back to Russia and stay there forever and that, thinks Shane Hollander, is wrong.

    It's so wrong that Shane can't stop himself from doing something about it. Even though that something is the most reckless, the only reckless thing he's ever done in his life. He marries Rozanov in secret, to keep him out of Russia and put him on a path to Canadian citizenship.

    Shane's got a five-year plan to get him there and when you have a plan nothing can go wrong. Right? Right. When you have a solid plan and a marriage that's on paper only there's no risk of feelings getting involved. Not on Rozanov's part and certainly not on Shane's.

    Right???

    (or, the story of how Shane Hollander fell in love with his own husband)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    150,160
    Chapters:
    21/21
    Comments:
    6,355
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    20,182
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    8,328
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    19 Apr 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Ilya opened one of his messages.

    Have you seen the news?
    Ilya, call me. Now.
    Please tell me you already fucking know.
    Jesus Christ, man.

    That was it. No context. No explanation. Just panic wrapped in vague bullshit.

    His jaw locked. “Are you fucking serious right now,” he muttered, thumb scrolling harder than necessary. Say it or don’t, you assholes. The half-answers made his skin crawl. It felt like they were all circling something awful, whispering around it, waiting for him to step close enough to get hit.

    His chest felt tight now, pressure building, so he did the one thing that made sense. He opened social media.

    Shane Hollander’s name was everywhere.

    Or

    Shane was hurt in ways everyone could see, and in ways only Ilya would carry.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,807
    Chapters:
    2/2
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    29 Mar 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Shane doesn’t realize he’s braced for silent eyes until he feels the absence of it — the weight of teammates immediately finding him and going quiet, waiting for him to fuck up, to say the wrong thing, to exist wrong. He expects the chatter of a room to drop when he enters and its disconcerting to find it doesn't yet in Ottawa.

    He stands at the entrance a beat too long.

    --

    It’s the start of Shane Hollander’s first season in Ottawa and he should be settled. The Centaurs are friendly, the room is easy, and Ilya is finally close enough to touch. But, as Shane is intimately aware of, old habits learned the hard way will linger.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,982
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    516
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    8,616
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    1,898
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    115,084

    20 Mar 2026