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  1. Public Bookmark 60

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    Summary

    It was supposed to be casual, until Ilya saw Shane with his best friend. Now, he refuses to admit he cares, choosing to hurt Shane back instead. It is the start of a long, dark game. And both men are going to bleed.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,887
    Chapters:
    8/?
    Comments:
    90
    Kudos:
    195
    Bookmarks:
    60
    Hits:
    4,423

    23 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    last chapter read 8

  2. Public Bookmark 85

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    Summary

    A lot can happen in six months of no contact. For Ilya, it was vodka, distractions, and pretending he didn't care. For Shane... well, Ilya is about to find out. They’re supposed to just present an award and get it over with, but one look backstage is all it takes to completely wreck Ilya's carefully built denial.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    34,294
    Chapters:
    10/?
    Comments:
    130
    Kudos:
    288
    Bookmarks:
    85
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    7,018

    23 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    last chapter read 10

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Shane gasped and stumbled backwards. “Three weeks? You decided-” his hands flew to his mouth. “How could you do this without talking to me? This is what? To punish me because I won’t come out on your timeline?”

    Ilya felt a stab of anger. “You won’t come out on any timeline!”

    Shane blinked at him. “I literally drove here tonight because I wanted to know if you would accept six to twelve months!” 

    “A timeline,” he barked. “This is our lives, Shane. I want to be with you fully now. I know you are scared, but you need to be brave, and I am so deeply fucking unhappy being your dirty little secret.”

    “That’s not fair Ilya, it’s going to be complicated for me. I’m already the only Asian captain in the league! The media, sponsors, the Voyageurs? It’s going to need to be carefully managed-”

    Or: After the Boxing Day fight, Ilya loses faith in the idea that Shane will come out quickly and decides to make a wild move and agrees on a trade to Vancouver. Can these two idiots in love find their way back to each other?

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,504
    Chapters:
    3/20
    Comments:
    234
    Kudos:
    631
    Bookmarks:
    342
    Hits:
    12,053

    18 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Last chapter read 3
    Ilya trade to Vancouver

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    "Shane Hollander is retiring."

    Ilya rolled over to look at his wife, next to him in bed in one of his old Boston t-shirts. She was staring at her phone, scrolling rapidly.

    "What do you mean, Hollander is retiring?"

    Ilya thought back to the last time he'd seen — really seen — Hollander. Hollander had Ilya's cock in his mouth. Ilya could still remember the blend of annoyance and need on Hollander's face, the tears in the corner of his eyes. Ilya had wanted to dominate him, to take him apart, to wreck him and then put him back —

    Svetlana interrupted the memory.

    Or: Ilya and Shane stopped seeing each other before the Sochi Olympics. When Ilya hears Shane is retiring, he decides it's finally time to reconnect. Which means that, after 15 years of mutual unspoken obsession, it is time for both Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov to decide what each man means to the other.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    73,232
    Chapters:
    9/9
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    284
    Kudos:
    903
    Bookmarks:
    334
    Hits:
    25,730

    23 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    -complete 23.06.26
    Breakup
    ilya et svetlana
    Shane retraite

  5. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    Ilya let out a quiet laugh, shaking his head. “I want to be perfect for you, Shane. To make up for all the time we lost.”

    “I don’t want perfect,” Shane said quietly, stroking Ilya’s cheek. “I want something real. Something that we fight to make work, because we want it so much. Because being together is so much fucking better than being without each other.”

    ***

    Ten years ago, Shane and Ilya loved each other in secret and let each other go anyway.

    Now Shane, captain of the Ottawa Centaurs, is a single dad to four-year-old Ollie, and good at pretending he doesn’t think about the man he lost when they were younger and terrified of the fallout of being caught. Then one chance meeting turns into drinks, lingering looks, old feelings, and suddenly Ilya Rozanov is everywhere again.

    Some things, it turns out, never really leave you.

    As Shane and Ilya fall back into each other’s lives - and into something softer, steadier, and openly theirs this time — they realise maybe they’re finally ready for the life they used to dream about.

    Or: two hockey players who were each other’s first love reconnect ten years later and slowly build the family they always wanted.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    114,785
    Chapters:
    16/16
    Comments:
    2,620
    Kudos:
    4,895
    Bookmarks:
    1,796
    Hits:
    165,368

    07 Jun 2026

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Complète 22.06.26
    Ollie !