ash_terz

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    “They both want to fuck you. That entire family is trying to fuck you. I think we should call the police. Put restraining order for your hole.”

    “Ilya, are you drunk?”

    “Hollander, this is a serious problem!”

    “Just because he is gay, it doesn’t mean he wants to fuck me.” Shane scoffs. “Maybe he’s a bottom too.”

    “So, that’s your problem? Not that he wants your hole?”

    “Ilya, I swear, if you don’t stop saying that word—”

    “It’s wrong, you know,” Ilya informs seriously. “You fucked Rose Landry. Now Peter Landry is trying to fuck you. All the holes are connecting. This is basically incest.”

    “Didn’t you sleep with those Swedish twins in Cabo?”

    “They were not identical. It does not count!”

    OR: Ilya's life gets plagued by a different Landry this time, AKA an interpretation of the 'let's sleep with other people' fight mentioned in TLG, AKA, an ode to Jealous Ilya.

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    03 Jun 2026

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    22 May 2026

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    01 Feb 2026