Spartaness
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When six paying customers become trapped inside a luxury bathroom showroom, Robert sends Sonar and Waterboy into a venture-backed luxury bathroom experience to perform the least dignified rescue operation in Z-Team history.
Float Capital calls it an adaptive cleanse cycle.
Waterboy calls it bad plumbing.
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Robert has three active calls, one sleeping dog, and no visible stapler.
Unfortunately, Sonar has follow-up questions.
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Vers likes systems, clear odds, and problems that misbehave just enough to be interesting. The warehouse equations have stopped resolving. The city's pattern is wrong in a way she can feel without seeing. The bar is loud enough to count as a different background.
Then someone two stools down tries to sell her a soft con dressed up as a back-room blackjack game.
Saying yes is the worst call she's made all month. It is also how she ends up embedded at SDN, sideways into a team of disasters she was never supposed to become load-bearing for, and on the wrong side of two people who become structurally irreplaceable before she notices. The structure won't hold.
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Cult calls are always paperwork with chanting.
Sonar and Malevola have handled this sort of nonsense before. Usually there are candles. Usually someone mistakes Malevola for the wrong demon. Usually Sonar ends up committing public service through fraud literacy, tactical bullshit, and one or two decisions Blazer would absolutely put in a laminated behavioural category.
Tonight, there are hostages, a cursed artifact, a rich prophet-founder with poor governance, and Ch’aad.
Ch’aad is underperforming.
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Do You Want to See Something Cool? by Spartaness
Fandoms: The Wildsea (Roleplaying Game)
21 Apr 2026
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The mountain is wrong. The old-world machinery under it is worse. Vers has a model, Ilyra has a crew, and neither of them has enough self-preservation to leave it alone. A standalone omake featuring temporal distortion, salvage-site bad ideas, distributed motion, and a level of professional interest that may qualify as its own hazard.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 27,633
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 1
- Hits:
- 11
Recent bookmarks
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Summary
You are alone. You have been alone for a very long time.
Until you are not.---
The hatchling can't escape the loop, and discovers the one other being who knows what it's like to be trapped forever.
Bookmarked by Spartaness
23 Nov 2023
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Separated by vast gulfs of time and space, the last of their two people, their meeting defies probability.
And yet, they meet.
Bookmarked by Spartaness
26 Oct 2023
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Essek ventures into the dark depths of the mysterious Aeor with his friends, the Mighty Nein, but when a battle comes to a head and Essek makes a choice it throws his life into chaos and he struggles to right it. Everything is the same and different, his knowledge and actions are questioned and tested and Essek comes to some very startling realisations along the way.
A multi-chaptered fic answering all of the Essek Week 2021 prompts, join Essek on a journey unlike anything he has experienced as he attempts to make good on a rare opportunity afforded no one else.
Series
- Part 1 of The Fullness of Time
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 162,788
- Chapters:
- 22/22
- Comments:
- 510
- Kudos:
- 741
- Bookmarks:
- 200
- Hits:
- 21,171
Bookmarked by Spartaness
03 Sep 2021
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Demonology and the Tri-Phasic Model of Trauma: An Integrative Approach by Nnm
Fandoms: Good Omens (TV)
05 Oct 2019
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As soon as Aubrey Thyme, psychotherapist, had opened her office door and seen her new client, Anthony J. Crowley, sitting in her waiting area, she was observing and assessing him. At first glance, she paid attention to the following:
--His clothing was expensive and stylish;
--He wore very strange but noticeable cologne;
--His relationship to the seat he occupied could only, very loosely, be described as “sitting;”
--He looked angry;
--He was wearing sunglasses.What Aubrey Thyme, a professional, thought, upon first seeing her new client was: you’re going to be a fun one, aren’t you?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 99,423
- Chapters:
- 16/16
- Collections:
- 65
- Comments:
- 6,925
- Kudos:
- 33,427
- Bookmarks:
- 11,950
- Hits:
- 596,110
Bookmarked by Spartaness
09 May 2020
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Conversations with a Cryptid by AMournfulHowlInTheNight
Fandoms: 僕のヒーローアカデミア | Boku no Hero Academia | My Hero Academia
26 Dec 2017
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Summary
The man was over a century old. There had to be more to it. In hindsight, it hadn’t been one of Izuku’s better ideas.
Series
- Part 1 of Conversations with a Cryptid
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 67,379
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 94
- Comments:
- 2,650
- Kudos:
- 19,027
- Bookmarks:
- 4,092
- Hits:
- 471,372
Bookmarked by Spartaness
17 Dec 2017