MagicNumberisPurple



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  1. Public Bookmark *

    Words:
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    28 Feb 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Bruce didn't intend for Batman to become a bat cryptid guarding Gotham, but it works in keeping crime down so he rolls with it, his gaggle of children eagerly diving headfirst into the role, but when the Justice League comes sniffing around the edges of his territory and his kids decide to do the funniest thing ever, can Batman keep up the biggest con of his life?

    But when has anything ever been simple in Gotham

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    26 Jan 2026

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Batman is so confused, every time he meets with the Justice league they seem to think he's a vampire. And it is a good cover so why not lean into it?
    Then he gets kids, who become heroes, and find it hilarious to play along.
    He should have just come clean in the beginning...

    or

    Justice league assume Bruce is a vampire due to rumours and he just rolls with it

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    19/?
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    20 Jan 2026

  4. Public Bookmark *

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    19 Jan 2026

  5. Public Bookmark *

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    Duke sputtered as Bruce's massive gauntlet-clad fingers fumbled clumsily at the edges of his helmet. "B—Batman, I swear if you break my mask—"

    Bruce ignored him, growling low in frustration when he couldn't find the release mechanism (because Duke had learned from Jason’s horror stories and installed a biometric lock).

    Steph landed nearby. "Oh my god, I think he’s trying to check your temperature like a sick kid. B, we have literal thermometers in the suits."

    Dick swung down next to them. "Nah nah nah, this is classic Batdad behavior—first comes the baby-carrying, then comes the 'must inspect child for ouchies' phase." He leaned in toward Duke. "He did this to me once after Fear Gas. Held me up by the armpits to check for head wounds."

    Bruce finally gave up on removing Duke’s helmet, only to press their foreheads together with an audible thunk. "...No fever?"

    Yeah. He was definitely a little inebriated on the gas.

    Duke went completely still. "...Did you just headbutt me?"

    "Safe?"

    Duke was starting to realize why everyone called Bruce "Caveman B" when drugged. (Damnit, Crane.)

    Series
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    18 Jan 2026