LiutenantMars



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  1. Rec *

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    Five years ago, Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov quietly went their separate ways. They handled their heartbreak differently. Shane cut off his family and friends and focused only on hockey, not that it helped, his game has totally fallen apart. Ilya had the support of the Centaurs, even if they didn't know why they were supporting him.

    But when Ilya announces his retirement at the end of the next season, it shakes Shane back to reality. He has one season left to play against the man he still loves; and then, would he ever see him again? As Shane starts to piece his life back together, the biggest missing piece is still Ilya.

    Ilya had planned to just enjoy the last season he'd play of professional hockey and obviously try to win another cup. But when Shane reaches back out, he has much more to consider. He never expected to talk to Shane again, but he can't deny that it's everything he's wanted in the last five years.

    Can they salvage what they had? Should they even try? How can Shane and Ilya be a part of each other's lives again?

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    134,160
    Chapters:
    18/18
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    19 May 2026

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    "Why are you not scared?"

    "I am scared," Ilya admits. "I just am tired. Of hiding me. Of hiding you. Of hiding how much I love you. I want to go to the rink— how do you say it? Authenti."

    "Authentically," Shane supplies, automatically.

    "Yes. Authentically. I want to go to the rink authentically, as me," Ilya confirms.

    Ilya looks at Shane, pauses until Shane meets his eyes. "I want to say: I, Ilya Rozanov, love a man, and that man's name is Shane Hollander."

     

    -

    Or, sometimes it takes a little more time, and some courage, to be with the one you love.

    Language:
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    Chapters:
    9/9
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    21 Apr 2026

  3. Rec *

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    I slept with Buck, he imagines saying out loud. To Bobby, probably. Bobby gives good advice, always listens carefully, like it matters. Doesn't judge, at least not out loud.

    Gave. Bobby gave good advice. Bobby is never going to look at Eddie across the big table at the station loft with a faintly amused expression on his face while he tells Eddie something that Eddie deep down already knew.

    I slept with Buck. I don't know what to do.

    Bobby would raise his eyebrows and say, Well, maybe you should talk to him.

    Language:
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    11,180
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    1/1
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    281
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    08 May 2025

  4. Rec *

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    And look: this whole thing could probably be resolved with a single honest conversation. He’s sure that with a little communication they could all manage to come to some arrangement. In fact, Patrick is pretty certain that he could fix their marriage himself by finally getting them both into bed at the same time. But Art is extremely reticent to voice what he actually wants, and Tashi can’t do anything without making it into a game, so here they are, each sneaking into Patrick’s bed and pretending that they’re mad about it.

    Patrick has no problem voicing what he wants or being direct. He wants Art. And he wants Tashi. If they could get their shit together and realize that they both want him, too, he’d probably be the happiest man in the goddamn world.

    Language:
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    23,610
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    1/1
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    20 Sep 2024

  5. Rec 91

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    After New Rochelle there's Cincinnati. And then, of course, it’s back to where it all started.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    19,420
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
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    19 Jul 2024