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  1. Public Bookmark *

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    A tall blonde man at a quiet corner of the bar had turned out to be far less drunk than he had seemed, and now Napoleon’s wrist was caught in an iron grip, and he had been hauled up close for inspection with no apparent effort. His ‘victim’, Napoleon noted, startled, was like a deliberately ruined painting, movie-star looks gashed by a thin, hard line of a mouth and pitiless blue eyes; there was a cold savagery to his poise, his immaculate charcoal suit, his fine-combed hair that shone a dull bloody rust in the muted mood lighting of the bar. Pointedly, the stranger picked his watch out of Napoleon’s grip, and pocketed it.

    Valentine's Day gift for Vawn/Typohime

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,048
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    123
    Kudos:
    3,390
    Bookmarks:
    493
    Hits:
    25,838

    15 Feb 2016

  2. Public Bookmark *

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    Napoleon has a problem. A conundrum, really. The sort of thing that could get him in rather a lot of trouble if he lets it get away from him. Napoleon is not the sort to let a potentially compromising issue go unchecked, but in this case he's sorely tempted to make an exception and let the chips fall where they may.

    His conundrum, you see, is Illya's hands. Napoleon can't stop thinking about those hands on him. What's more, he's finding he doesn't really want to.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    5,458
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    65
    Kudos:
    2,213
    Bookmarks:
    390
    Hits:
    22,025

    17 Nov 2015

  3. Public Bookmark *

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    Five times Napoleon actually surprised Illya, and the one time Illya managed to surprise him.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,370
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    953
    Bookmarks:
    190
    Hits:
    10,717

    12 Nov 2015

  4. Rec *

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    Illya kills an American spy in Zurich.

    Three days later, he’s staring into the face of a dead man standing in his hotel room.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,592
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    342
    Kudos:
    4,855
    Bookmarks:
    1,448
    Hits:
    55,305

    02 Nov 2015

  5. Rec 43

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    Summary

    After Napoleon’s death, Illya settles into his life without him... though it’s not quite as without him as he’d thought it had been.
    Obligatory Halloween fic, mfu style.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,961
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    28
    Kudos:
    388
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    3,908

    31 Oct 2015

  6. Rec 42

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    Illya remembered his last conversation with his father vividly. He was sixteen. In two years, he would kill his first human being, but at sixteen he was a child born to a life of privilege, surrounded by other children of privilege, and at fifteen he and his friends had begun, slowly, to become aware of the mystery of the fairer sex, or, at least, of girls their age.

    It was summer in Moscow, a warm day, the sky sprawling above like a gate to Heaven, an impossible open blue laced with wisps of silver. Illya did not know it yet, but the world had already shifted under his feet. A month from now, he and his privileged friends would be in an orphanage, with nothing but the shirts on their backs. Now, however, Illya had little thought in his head but for the argument in the morning that had ended with Pyotr pushing Vasily into a duck pond.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,429
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    83
    Kudos:
    541
    Bookmarks:
    42
    Hits:
    6,591

    30 Oct 2015

  7. Public Bookmark *

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    "Honestly, I’m surprised we got through that in one piece. You’re lucky I was able to improvise so well.”

    The second he says it, Napoleon tenses. Shit, he’s just broken what he’s sure is a cardinal rule of undercover work with your partner: Never mention the sexual acts you do to them in the middle of a gay club to maintain your cover (no matter how well it worked, or how incredibly arousing it was).

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,349
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    93
    Kudos:
    1,642
    Bookmarks:
    237
    Hits:
    29,353

    30 Oct 2015

  8. This has been deleted, sorry!

    29 Oct 2015

  9. This has been deleted, sorry!

    24 Oct 2015

  10. Public Bookmark *

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    “Admit it, it is surprising.” Napoleon says, quietly. It is surprising, dammit. From the day he was recruited, he had always assume he would die in an ugly way, bleeding out in some bat country where, if they actually put a name on his grave, it would be the wrong one. Nobody ever expected him to survive.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,114
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    29
    Kudos:
    709
    Bookmarks:
    101
    Hits:
    5,544

    22 Oct 2015

  11. Rec 72

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    Illya killed his first man when he was eighteen. The spetsnaz were called in as part of the raid on Kengir, when prisoners in the labor camp had launched a surprise rebellion and had seized the camp compound. The man he killed was a sentry on a rooftop, one of the prisoner-rebels, and Illya would never see his face. He had felt only a faint surge of excitement, when the rifle had kicked into his shoulder, then satisfaction, as the spotter confirmed his kill. The kill was surgical and neat, like shooting a hare.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,956
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    81
    Kudos:
    545
    Bookmarks:
    72
    Hits:
    10,631

    21 Oct 2015

  12. Public Bookmark 29

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    Summary

    Five times Solo (sort of) asks Kuryakin about the scar on his temple, and one time he almost finds out

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    716
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    221
    Bookmarks:
    29
    Hits:
    2,992

    14 Oct 2015

  13. Rec *

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    Summary

    Slowly, Napoleon sat up. His cellmate was surprisingly young, possibly in his early twenties at the very most, rangy, with long arms and legs, his blonde hair cut short, almost to the skull. His blue eyes were narrowed in suspicion, his mouth flattened into a sharp line, and he was dressed in a filthy thin undershirt that had once been white, and a pair of BDU pants that were caked with dried blood on the right thigh. He was also quite possibly the most beautiful young man Napoleon had ever seen, and for a moment Napoleon thought that perhaps he’d had a harder knock to the head from the smugglers than he had thought.

    His cellmate looked Napoleon slowly over - the dusty, stained suit that was probably by now unsalvageable, the shirt with the top button ripped off, tie long missing, the cufflinks, the polished shoes, now mud-caked, and started to frown. “You are the American contact?” he asked quietly, in a thick Russian accent.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    6,916
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    103
    Kudos:
    2,096
    Bookmarks:
    416
    Hits:
    27,267

    09 Oct 2015

    Bookmarker's Notes

    Bottom Illya YAAS

  14. Rec *

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    Summary

    The first thing Napoleon says when he wakes up is: “Told you I was sick.”

    His head is pounding, and there isn’t a part of him that doesn’t hurt. Even breathing is painful, and cold fire burns through his lungs with each inhale. The world is a bit too bright, and Napoleon feels ready to sleep a week.

    He wriggles so he’s curled more comfortably. Illya stares down at him from the side of the bed, and Napoleon thinks he almost, almost, looks guilty.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    1,486
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    20
    Kudos:
    1,492
    Bookmarks:
    171
    Hits:
    15,841

    04 Oct 2015

  15. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    When the gun goes off, Illya doesn’t think as he throws himself in front of Napoleon.

    He doesn’t die, but he makes a lot of people angry, Napoleon most of all. He tries to make Illya swear he’ll never do something that stupid again.

    Illya refuses.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,879
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    223
    Kudos:
    2,709
    Bookmarks:
    488
    Hits:
    24,594

    04 Oct 2015

  16. This has been deleted, sorry!

    02 Oct 2015

  17. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Napoleon isn’t quite sure he can put yes, because your superiors don’t get to see you gloating when you’re not playing chess against yourself, and they don’t get to discuss dumb opera plots with you, they don’t get to see you engrossed in cheap paperbacks and treat them like first editions because you care that much about what they say, and they don’t get to see that you have a personality and that it’s everything but unpleasant when one gets to know you, and I don’t understand why would anyone think it’s a good idea to treat you like an asset and not a person in words that might not sound completely ridiculous, never mind that he’s not even sure Illya would take such a rant seriously.

    Or: where Illya has issues asking for what he wants if it falls under the unnecessary-to-his-job radar and Napoleon just might be a bit over in his head, but he's entirely willing to rectify that situation.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    21,720
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    274
    Kudos:
    3,792
    Bookmarks:
    1,068
    Hits:
    50,416

    01 Oct 2015

  18. Public Bookmark *

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    Summary

    Illya had very reluctantly agreed to ‘take a break’ with Napoleon after a year spent working for U.N.C.L.E., and was now regretting it. Granted, given how secretive Napoleon had been about it all, Illya had become increasingly convinced as they stole away from New York that their ‘little holiday’ was going to perhaps involve felonies, deviant sexual behaviour and perhaps an international incident or two.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,919
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    87
    Kudos:
    1,637
    Bookmarks:
    282
    Hits:
    18,703

    01 Oct 2015

  19. Public Bookmark *

    Tags
    Summary

    It ends the way it began, with the strike of a match.

    Or, Illya can always spot a lie.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,230
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    34
    Kudos:
    1,790
    Bookmarks:
    306
    Hits:
    16,120

    30 Sep 2015

  20. Public Bookmark 44

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    Summary

    Napoleon Solo and Illya Kuryakin are just two men- with (unfortunately) conflicting personalities- trying to stop a criminal organization in possession of nuclear weapons. Set modern day, rather than the 1960s. NapKin.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    17,850
    Chapters:
    7/7
    Comments:
    42
    Kudos:
    221
    Bookmarks:
    44
    Hits:
    8,023

    29 Sep 2015

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