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Like Real People Do by third_crow for barelyevenhere
Fandoms: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
24 Jan 2023
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Summary
“Could I get a name for the order?” Marlene asked.
“Serious,” the man replied. “Like the star,” he clarified, and Remus mentally scratched out 'Serious' and rewrote 'Sirius' in his head.
“The… star?” Marlene asked, her pen hovering over the cup as she hesitated.
“S-I-R-I-U-S,” Remus said. He stocked croissants into the display case, not looking up. “The Dog Star,” he added, “brightest star in the sky, actually. Visible from both hemispheres.” When he looked over, the man– Sirius– seemed surprised, his eyebrows raised as Remus spoke, and when Remus finished, he blinked a few times before smiling lopsidedly.
“Er– yeah,” he breathed a laugh. “That.” There was a baby on his hip. Somehow, it had taken Remus a second glance to notice that.
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Or, Remus works as a barista and Sirius comes in every morning with the world's cutest baby, and man, these two just wrote the book on mutual pining, huh?
Series
- Part 1 of the coffee shop au
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 36,527
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 13
- Comments:
- 931
- Kudos:
- 19,999
- Bookmarks:
- 4,748
- Hits:
- 318,934
Bookmarked by Edith
12 Jul 2026
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Summary
Percival is eagerly awaiting important test results. Too bad MACUSA needs him for mandatory boring meeting TM.
Series
- Part 3 of My Husband
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 320
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 12
- Kudos:
- 1,937
- Bookmarks:
- 96
- Hits:
- 21,134
Bookmarked by Edith
08 Jul 2026
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Summary
It's Percival's birthday and he gets a special surprise from Newt.
Happy Birthday Colin Farrell
Series
- Part 2 of My Husband
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 1,342
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 3
- Comments:
- 2
- Kudos:
- 1,005
- Bookmarks:
- 48
- Hits:
- 24,116
Bookmarked by Edith
08 Jul 2026
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Summary
Omega Nate Davis had suspected his Alpha boyfriend Eric was cheating on him with his pretty PA, and now he had proof. All he wanted to do was wallow in his misery and forget the world existed.
But Eric's older Alpha brother won't let him. In fact, he seemed determined to get Nate back on his feet and, quite possibly, in his own bed.
Bookmarked by Edith
05 Jul 2026
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Summary
Derek Hale’s not an idiot, okay. He knew becoming an Alpha wouldn’t prevent him from going into heat. He just thought… he just thought he had more time, because Alpha’s don’t go into heat unless they’re in the presence of their true mate. And that, well, Derek hadn’t been expecting that.
Bookmarked by Edith
05 Jul 2026
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Summary
At thirty-seven, Clement Quincey had not expected to find a mate anymore, but his uncle has plans for him as well as the legal right to marry Clement to whomever he pleases. With a groom who is way too young and much too handsome to be faithful at his side, Clement is convinced his marriage is already unsalvageable before it has begun. However, Benjamin Norwood is quite intrigued by the man his father chose for him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,891
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 92
- Kudos:
- 4,258
- Bookmarks:
- 616
- Hits:
- 43,184
Bookmarked by Edith
05 Jul 2026
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Summary
Imagine Person A is a morning person and Person B isn't. A tries to get out of bed in the morning without waking up B, but B notices and cuddles closer to A, wrapping their arms around them so that they can stay in bed longer. A struggles and tries to roll over to escape, but only manages to get on top of B. B then grabs A's hips and slowly grinds against them, leaving A turned on and eventually caving into some morning sex.
In which Bilbo refuses to let Thorin get out of bed.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 3,127
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 4
- Kudos:
- 515
- Bookmarks:
- 80
- Hits:
- 8,718
Bookmarked by Edith
19 Jun 2026
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Summary
Lonely and desperate, Bilbo once called a phone sex line and enjoyed, for a time, pleasure with the exclusive and grumpy Tomas. He never in a million years imagined meeting him, yet that is precisely what happens, when Bilbo's workplace hires a new operator.
Bookmarked by Edith
19 Jun 2026
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Worth a Thousand Words by liasangria for mephestopheles
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types
17 Dec 2015
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Summary
In a box under the bed there lived a collection of memories (some of which were too saucy to leave lying around where just anyone might see them).
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 0
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 18
- Kudos:
- 544
- Bookmarks:
- 55
- Hits:
- 7,854
Bookmarked by Edith
19 Jun 2026
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To Drive The Cold Winter Away: A Christmas Tale by badskippy for Airborn
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
20 Dec 2016
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Summary
Bilbo is on his way home for Christmas! But his car doesn't want to cooperate! Now he's stuck and just what in the blue blazes is he going to do?!
Cue an old, unrequited flame to come to the rescue.
Series
- Part 14 of Bagginshield One-Offs
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 9,194
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 54
- Kudos:
- 604
- Bookmarks:
- 117
- Hits:
- 7,047
Bookmarked by Edith
19 Jun 2026
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Summary
Thorin is a bartender and spots a handsome man with golden curls and blue eyes sitting at the bar barely 4 feet away from him. Unfortunately, the man has a date sitting next to him. A striking man with dark, curly hair and pale blue eyes. He shrugs away the feeling of disappointment and continues to work. About an hour later, when the man with dark hair had left, presumably to go to the bathroom, Thorin asks if the gold-haired man wants anything to drink, he says,
“Ah… An angel shot, please?”
(If you don't know, at a bar someone can order an angel shot to let the bartender know they feel unsafe. There are three different ways to order an angel shot.
Neat - Customer wants to be escorted to their car.
With Ice - The customer wants the bartender to discreetly arrange for a cab.
With Lime - The customer feels they are in immediate danger and want the police called.)
Bookmarked by Edith
19 Jun 2026
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The secrets to happiness by Kytanna for navyfeather
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types
08 Apr 2020
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Summary
When Thorin attended Kíli's football match the last thing he expected was to meet a cute stranger with beautiful eyes. But Thorin has been burned far too many times and is not sure if he's ready to take another chance at love.
Maybe a misunderstanding will be the solution to his problems.For the Tumblr prompt: "Modern AU, Frodo and Fili and/or Kili play a sport, but for opposite teams. Thorin and Bilbo sit next to each other. The infamous scoling other team/praising their children begins between them, turning into a heated battle who's team/child is better! That until one team scores, and the belonging uncle is so over the moon they grasp the other's head and take them in for a deep kiss ★∪★"
Bookmarked by Edith
19 Jun 2026
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The One in the Waiting Room by ErinacchiLove for alkjira
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types
04 Nov 2015
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Summary
Bilbo and Thorin meet at a maternity hospital waiting room while Primula and Dís are giving birth.
Bookmarked by Edith
18 Jun 2026
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The Right Thigh by DreDri
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
02 Jul 2013
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Summary
“I am totally fucked.” Bilbo said aloud just before the song ended.
They picked up another song almost immediately and Bilbo downed his beer and began to wonder why he had ever stopped coming to things like this.
Bookmarked by Edith
16 Jun 2026
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Summary
In which the Company are entirely too nosy about matters that are supposed to be a secret, and Bilbo learns that being concerned about propriety is overrated when you could be making friends instead.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,997
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Comments:
- 311
- Kudos:
- 19,499
- Bookmarks:
- 3,909
- Hits:
- 164,934
Bookmarked by Edith
14 Jun 2026
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Summary
Forget-me-not: a small flower, with four petals, which are normally found in shades of blue with a pink or white centre. These are traditional flowers of intent in the Shire, used to express true love, and remembrance.
In which Bilbo plans to leave Erebor, and Thorin tries to understand why.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 24,876
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 126
- Kudos:
- 4,484
- Bookmarks:
- 1,142
- Hits:
- 54,200
Bookmarked by Edith
10 Jun 2026
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Green Magic by SOABA
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
21 Oct 2019
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Summary
Seeing Fíli in Azog’s clutches wakes a long-dormant magic in Bilbo and the tides of battle are irrevocably turned.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 10,085
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Comments:
- 131
- Kudos:
- 4,056
- Bookmarks:
- 1,129
- Hits:
- 52,763
Bookmarked by Edith
07 Jun 2026
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Summary
“I speak of Thorin’s marriage,” Dain announced.
Bilbo’s mind stuttered to a stop. “What?”
“Thorin’s upcoming marriage. It is widely expected.”
Everything in the Great Hall suddenly seemed louder, almost suffocating. A cold tension swept through Bilbo’s body as the idea tried to take hold. Thorin? Marriage? To whom?
Bookmarked by Edith
07 Jun 2026
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as is the custom by ever_yours
Fandoms: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types
12 Dec 2021
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Summary
After everything, Bilbo becomes an integral part of castle workings—and honestly, there’s not much waiting for him back at the Shire. So he stays, and decides to learn more about dwarrow culture while he’s at it. As it turns out, dwarf kings are significantly more affectionate than he’d expect...
(Or: Four dwarf traditions Bilbo adopted, and one very pleasant custom that dwarves and hobbits share.)
Bookmarked by Edith
07 Jun 2026
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Shipment by rutobuka
Fandoms: The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
06 Jun 2026
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Summary
Bilbo is hitching a ride on a dwarven cart back to Erebor, and accidentally takes a peek at some interesting wares ordered by Queen Thorin. (Comic)
Bookmarked by Edith
06 Jun 2026