Chapter Text
Over the next week Ed started his work with the Maritime museum, brushing up on the local history, making a couple trips out to visit the space and talking with the owners, standard prep work before the bigger review. Though the museum wasn't too far, the commute gave him time to reflect on how his life had shifted these past few months because of Stede. Their shopping trip spurred something inside him, challenging his own notion of who he was and wanted to be. Maintaining such a stony image had been exhausting, and now that he had a taste of freedom, he was ready to turn over every rock he could in the process of finding himself. So on his way home from the museum, he made an impulse decision, called around for a few minutes before pulling into the parking lot of a barber that could fit him in, and texted Stede that he would be a bit late for dinner.
As each inch of hair drifted to the floor, Ed could feel the weight lift off him, both literally and emotionally. He’d really taken Stede’s comment from last weekend to heart, realizing how much he had been hiding behind a barrier of silver. It was just hair, right? It would grow back if he wanted it long again, but right now, he wanted a change, yet another moment that felt like a fresh start. Excitement fizzing in anticipation of Stede’s reaction, he strolled through the front door of Stede’s flat, following his nose to the kitchen where dinner was bubbling away. “Hey, love, what’s cookin’?” Ed asked, beaming, as he leaned against the doorframe.
“Oh perfect, you’re just in ti—” The clattering of falling silverware startled both of them as Stede’s eyes widened, taking in the freshly groomed man in the doorway. “ Edward? Oh my… you–!? ” Ed loved seeing Stede’s brain go offline as he ran his hand through the short curls that sat perfectly on the top of his head. “You like? Thought it was about time for a change, ya know, new me and all. Just in time for the big night.”
Stede was silent as he walked over to Ed, reaching out and running his own hands through the cropped silver hair. “Did– Did you mean to do that?” Stede asked, and laughter bubbled up in Ed as he considered what kind of circumstances would result in an accidental shearing.
“‘Course I did, silly man. I’ve been thinking about it all week, and decided it was time on the drive home. Something I needed to do, for myself. It was a part of me I didn’t let anyone else take for so long, but sometimes you have to let old things go in order to grow, right?”
Eyes still full of amazement, Stede’s head seemed to nod on its own as his mind processed the transformation in front of him. “Edward, you are a wonder. You’ve done so much for yourself just in the past week, but I know this has been much longer in the making. I– I’m so proud of you for doing what you want.”
Ed let his smile run freely across his face as Stede matched in stride, and pulled him into a grateful embrace. “Thanks, love. Couldn’t have done it without you. S’like I’ve been waiting my whole life for you to come in and fucking tear down my walls to make room for me to build someone I’ve always wanted to be. Couldn't do it on my own, needed help.” As he nuzzled into the now familiar scent at the crook of Stede’s neck, he sighed and felt himself release a breath he’d been holding for a lifetime. He felt this surge of contentment like he could draw from this well of love forever and it would never run dry.
“I love you, you know?” Edward whispered as their embrace tightened, not missing the hitch as Stede nodded against him and replied, “I think I’ve always loved you.” Soft words from people that had made a thousand choices that had taken them on different journeys but somehow still ended up here, which was a pretty fucking amazing place to be.
They nipped at each other as they distractedly had dinner on the couch, not wanting to leave each other’s side, warmed from the inside out from the good food and the better company. They decided to turn in early, satiated with the knowledge that they both loved each other, unconditionally. When they made their way to Stede’s bedroom, Stede rushed over to one of his trinket boxes and pulled a few smaller boxes. Edward looked curiously at what Stede had retrieved, and before he knew it, he had two soft little boxes shoved onto his lap.
“So, I still had that suit I’d worn to your first exhibit all those years ago. That’s actually what I’d been hoping to wear to The Revenge opening party. I’d taken it to a tailor but they absolutely botched it, almost a complete and total loss. Horrendous service from Badminton & Co., don’t ever use them. Anyway, I was devastated, I hadn’t worn that suit much, but it held so much significance for me. Quite fortunately, I met a fabulously fun new jeweler about a week prior and got a bit of an idea. I wanted to see if I could still have this thing I loved while allowing it to take the shape of something new so I had him make some pieces for me. And then I realized that really, they were for us . I want you to have these bits of me from long ago that I couldn’t give you at the time but were always yours.”
Ed opened the boxes, stunned into silence by the magnitude of this moment and the impact of these words. His breath left his body as he saw what was inside –an exquisite pair of earrings that resembled the delicate, dangling ones his mother had worn only bigger, bolder, with deep brocade teal and red sparkles woven into them– and a ring, simple and elegant with a clear glass stone that showcased fragile teal fabric. Ed recognized the significance in the pieces immediately, the threads of their first encounter that had unraveled their lives before they could weave themselves together again. Then Stede opened a box that had been resting in his own lap, displaying a silky red fabric that was connected by a brooch that mirrored the teal of Ed’s jewelry.
“I thought these would be a perfect final addition to both our outfits. You don’t have to wear both, or honestly either if it’s too much, that’s fine! Just know that this is how I see you, how I will always see you. You may not see yourself as an artist, but I see you as art . Brilliant and bold and something I will always want to keep in my life, however I can have you.”
Edward took a shaky breath in, the last damn breaking, the final, little wall that was pretty much already rubble at this point, utterly destroyed by Stede with a sledgehammer. There were words that Edward would eventually say but now could only come out in tears as he sobbed in Stede’s arms. Eventually, Edward responded with the only thing he could think of in the moment besides ‘ I love this man’ . The only other thing that was running through his brain he said aloud,
"You can have all of me, I’ve always been yours.”
And Edward gave all of himself to Stede that night, parts both new and old and parts he didn’t even know about yet. He trusted that Stede would love him through everything.
When they arrived at the Gala the following night arm in arm, Ed had a moment of panic as they made their way into this ocean of people, people that would see this brand new version of himself. It passed quickly though, as he felt the strong, steadfast presence next to him, and he guessed really it had always been him , he just didn’t have what he needed to put it out in the world yet. But everything was different now, he had someone who loved him through everything, the handshaking and the hobnobbing (which Edward was actually quite good at when he let himself have a little fun). He had someone who loved him through all the fake smiling which tonight turned out to be real smiling because Stede kept cracking jokes and whispering gossip about all the guests that he’d picked up from his assistant Lucius ( Lucius! ), causing Ed to giggle at the most inopportune times.
After dinner had been served and all the honorees had all given their humble thank you speeches, a photographer went around documenting the evening. Edward and Stede had found Oluwande, who they quickly learned was dating the elusive Jim, the beguiling artist glued to his side. They all stood chatting together about Jim’s latest piece when the photographer came over and asked for a picture of the group before taking separate ones of the couples.
While the photographer snapped away at a beaming Oluwande and a stoic Jim, Stede leaned over and in classic Stede fashion, whispered “What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?" Edward mumbled that he didn’t know and as he fell into his usual habit of striking a serene pose and smoldering for the camera, and as the man moved to capture them, Stede leaned against the curve of Edward’s shoulder and said, "So-fish-ticated“.
It was the dumbest thing he’d ever heard, and Edward managed to keep it together for a few seconds as he heard the shutter click, but he couldn’t keep the giggles at bay for long. He erupted into laughter and pressed backward into Stede and felt arms wrap around his lace-clad middle. Stede snickered next to the jewels that gleamed on his ears.
“Good one, right?”
“Oh god , that’s been the worst dad joke yet!” Edward laughed as the camera moved on to the next group, the man complimenting their outfits before wandering off.
“Oh you love them,” Stede swatted at his side as he beamed with affection, and Edward had to admit he did love them. He loved every single part of Stede. He wished he could take all of his grandiose feelings and put them into a bottle so he would always have something to pour out for Stede. He wished he could perfectly capture their history and journey in one single moment he could hold on to forever. And as it turned out, the photos from that night did a pretty damn good job of doing just that.
When the email file containing the evening’s memories showed up in his inbox a few weeks later, Edward scrolled through and his breath caught at one of the images on the screen. He ordered a sizable print of it immediately, it would be the first photograph of many that adorned their walls, slowly turning Stede’s house into their home. In that flash, one of the dozens of new beginnings they shared together was captured, two people that had both given up and gone through so much but ended up finding themselves again in each other. Two threads that, in time, were destined to be woven into a beautiful fabric. It was a reminder that sometimes you don’t always have to completely get rid of the old things, they may just need a bit of mending so they can be even better than before.
