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Watching the light dance in Viktor’s eyes was a silent, secret pastime that Yuuri enjoyed far too greedily. He thought he had seen almost every flicker spark in those eyes. Curious emotions that Yuuri assumed he had already mastered; a new kind of hunger burning within those depths as Viktor watched the Grand Prix Final for the first time as a spectator.
Filing the curve of Viktor’s lip and set of his brow not to praise, or anger, or distaste but- to the longing look of desire dancing within that set of piercing blue eyes.
Uncertainly filling Yuuri’s chest until it was set to burst, unsure if he would ever be worthy to walk the same footsteps as his idol without failing to fall multiple times along the way.
“By the way Yuuri… What did you want to talk to me about?”
Emotions again laid bare on the surface for Yuuri to sift and sort; trust balancing uneasy threatening to break on the tip of his words.
“Right.” Pausing for breath, trying to calm his racing heart and sweating palms from cracking bones under skin with the weight upon his shoulders. “After the Final, let’s end this.”
His own fingers suddenly taking all of Yuuri’s interest, background noises fading to a dull thrum before Viktor’s piercing voice pulled him back through the grey.
“Yuuri! You don't mean any of that!”
Yuuri knew what he meant, knew what he saw during the Short Program as Viktor gazed at the ice longingly from one competitor to the next. Guilt pressing down on Yuuri’s shoulders while stabbing at his heart with his competitors jeers that he was keeping Viktor away from them; that he was only a disappointment in their eyes every time his feet touched the ice.
Viktor’s warm hands, always so tender and comforting suddenly becoming painful on Yuuri’s shoulders as he held on. As he tried to cling to the thin connection of thread tethering their fates together, even as it was unravelling from both ends.
“I don't want to be the one holding you back, the one person you end up hating the most for taking your love away from you!” Tears threatening to fall as Yuuri again couldn't bear to look Viktor in the eye, to have his resolve crumble at just one smile from the most handsome, kind, giving individual that Yuuri had ever met.
Viktor had paid his faith in spades by giving Yuuri a whole new view on skating life, the only pay back he could see was to let that love free to blossom.
"But Yuuri don't you see?” Viktor’s soft fingertips trailing down Yuuri’s chin, pulling his gaze gently to Viktor’s own, “My life was barely breathing before I truly saw you; my love nonexistent before I met you. You-“ Viktor pulling Yuuri even closer towards him, warm breath fanning on his face as he continued, “are both my Eros and Agape, my devil and angel all wrapped up into one amazing Yuuri.”
Yuuri held speechless as Viktor leaned in the final few inches, strong resolve crumbling with the heat of Viktor’s fingers and the soft press of lips against his own in a silent plea of understanding. Viktor pulling back only after putting every ounce of emotion behind his kiss, staring at Yuuri even more longingly.
“If you doubt me, just watch my expressions during your free skate. Watch how those reactions and emotions could never be- were never meant to be shared with anyone else. You changed me in ways I never even thought possible and, I'll be damned if I'm too weak to keep you by my side now.”
Viktor’s arms encircling him in a fierce hug, Yuuri caught shaking in disbelief that Viktor would ever think himself weak in Yuuri’s eyes.
“But Viktor- “ Cut off by the soft brush of a finger against Yuuri’s lip, pressing firmly to silence before pulling away with finality of the final word.
“Just watch today and if you still have any doubts on just what you have truly done for me and yourself, then and only then, make your decision after the free skate. Results be damned, just let me know after that moment what you feel in your heart after your skate.”
Yuuri in shock as the remainder of the night bled into the following morning. Viktor’s words coming back to him at breakfast, during warmups, and all through the afternoon until it was time for him to take the ice.
Vision fading to black as Yuuri gathered all of the years of frustration and heartache under his feet, envisioning smashing them all underfoot as the first chords of the song signalled him to life on the ice.
Eyes opening to connect across the rink with the only gaze that mattered in the entire arena - a striking blue filled with complete trust at whatever course Yuuri decided to follow in his routine.
Yuuri repaying that burning desire for life and especially, love as he soared across the ice.