Work Text:
Love hasn't been something easy, most likely only ignited when it meets what supposedly feels likely to be.
Waiting for someone to light the fire took more time than it should have.
It needs encouragement, the kind that one's finally accepting to do so. You cannot light the fire without meeting the perfect conditions, knowing it can get bad when the right time hasn't come just yet.
You need gasoline for the fire to have more impact.
The gasoline of love and incentive.
And that's what Doelle have been missing out on.
Don't get them wrong, they really love Emyrs like everything.
They really do.
It's just…the problem is all coming from them, not their relationship, but from Doelle themselves. They don't have that courage in them, having such a doubt about themselves even when things have been feeling smooth-sailing, only needing him to take the initiative. Because they aren't sure whether the place next to Emyrs belongs to them or not.
What if that place wasn't born to be them, but belonged to someone else instead?
What if Emyrs wanted something that they didn't have, something they couldn't afford, no matter how hard they've been trying?
What if they ruined such love, the kind that felt too precious and fragile like glass?
It's stupid and Doelle know it too. They sigh as their head leans against their office window, with Mirella and Seina looking at them full of concern, spacing out over something they don't know. They don't know about this—about them have been so strange lately, and Mirella can tell something's off almost right away. She's their sibling after all, who has been with them throughout the ups and downs in their lives before anyone else mattered.
"Are they spacing out again, Mire-chan?" Seina stands there beside her girlfriend as she sighs, knowing all too well what's been going on, but doesn't know how to make it right. Mirella just looks at her lover as she nods. This situation has happened to be the third time this month, and both of them are tired of it already.
After all, Mirella and Seina know about the love, the mutual adoration they have for each other. How could they not know about it, especially when they're the one knowing and understand it all, more than anyone? They know about all those silent glances Doelle have given to the other man, all with the endearment of someone who personally hung the stars. They know about this love not being one-sided, that Emyrs cares about the other just as much as the other does.
And here they are.
Stuck at the traffic lights that no one dares to take a step forward.
And it's painful just by watching it happen in front of you.
Seina's tired of such foolish acts already, and Mirella knows some kind of decision was made at that moment. She tries to stop her girlfriend, wanting to let both of them figure it out themselves because, trust her—she and Seina have been doing anything they can just to get them to be official already. And yet, she knows if she stopped Seina right now, then nothing would ever change, and things would keep happening in the most drastic, unfortunate way possible.
"Seina, mi amor, calm down please." Mirella tries to follow her lover, who has already made her way towards her sibling, trying to pull her girlfriend away from such trouble (emphasizing on trying by "tugging" by the hem of Seina's sleeve as gently as her doremin form), but nothing ever works out. She follows the others' steps as they are now standing in front of Doelle, eyes all focused on the other, who is now still spacing out by the window.
"Doelle, we need to talk."
His writing pages are left widely open as the ink has already dried from ages ago, meaning that Doelle haven't touched his paperwork for hours, just sitting here and doing absolutely nothing at all. That sight irks Seina even more as her hand is placed on the other's shoulder, gently shaking just to snap their attention back to where they currently are right now. "Doelle. Doelle! Can you hear me? I have enough, we need to talk!"
"Huh—What?" Doelle snap themselves out of their very own world as they turn to look at Seina, watching as her eyebrows furrow and her lips start to pout for no reason at all. That sight is, not gonna lie, adorable in a way or so, though they know Seina is being serious about this. They cough, trying to fully lock in as they look at Seina once again, now being more focused than what befell earlier.
"What is it, Seina? What do you want to talk about?"
"I need you to lock in and fix this whole—This! Everything!! All of them!!!" Seina groans as her hands waver almost everywhere, though her tone is full of accusation as she points towards the chunks of letters neatly tied and organized on Doelle's working desk. They are all hidden behind the books like some kind of sacred belongings that need extra protection, though all of them know way too well whose is that for.
Doelle just look at Seina, then at the Mirella who is just standing there with her arms crossed, clearly in agreement with whatever her partner just said. They look at them—Mirella and Seina- then to the letters lying there as if they were some kind of reminder of whatever's occurring in their life right now. Doelle know they can't just beat around the bush like this any longer, and yet, they don't know how to make it right either.
What if they mess it up, ruining what's bonded between them and Emyrs?
What then?
"I…don't know," is all that they can ever come up with at such a moment, as Doelle try their best to ignore the stares the two girls have been giving them. Seina just stands there in bewilderment, clearly still in denial that Doelle just said something like that without even thinking twice. She tries to calm herself down as she walks around the room, with Mirella helping her to calm down a little bit from the situation itself.
"Look, Doelle," Mirella says as she slowly takes Doelle's hand and starts drawing doodles to ease the other's discomfort.
"I know love is scary and all, but I know you're just gonna be the perfect person for Emyrs out of anyone out there. Hell, you are even better than that fucking bastard." Doelle just look at everywhere except for their own sister, afraid of listening to something they might not want to hear, and what doesn't sit right to it.
And yet.
"You love him, and no one can ever change that. Not even Nana and not even me."
The cruelest fact of all is that they want to hear it. They know deep down inside, that is true—the fact that they have been trying their absolute best to avoid, and yet they just no other way to avoid it—not when their love for Emyrs has been way too loud to ignore. They know their sibling is right, always with caution and actions of hesitation lingered in every second passing by.
"So please, don't be scared of love. Just follow its call and stop ignoring it."
Mirella says as she softly smiles as she looks at Seina, especially when she was also in the same situation when she first loved Seina and now they're all here together. Seina sighs as she walks towards them, giving both Mirella and Doelle a brief hug as her way of showering love without making everything worse."You have us here. Me and Mire-chan, we're here to help you with anything."
"Thank you, Seina. Thank you, Mire." Doelle giggles at the comfort thrown their way, watching as the girls staying by his side without asking for anything more. They watch as the other two tighten their hug with them, giving them the comfort that they truly deserve.
"And I'm sorry for crashing out on that, but you need to get those letters away soon. I'm sick of seeing i—"
"Seina Mitsuki." Both siblings say in unison, as Seina laughs harder, clinging to them both like a big teddy bear embracing them both.
"Okay okay, I'm sorry hehe."
—
And well.
Seina isn't wrong about that.
They really need to get those letters away.
Doelle sighs at the sight of such letters lying across their working desk, all with different inks and all written on different dates. It's hard just to see them here, knowing how much they've been loving since eternity just to pour their heart out into words.
Being a writer is a blessing but also a curse.
Because all they know is to pour their feelings into words, while Emyrs love action spoken louder than words.
They aren't the type to love someone as loudly as exposing their so-called through action, but more like a soothing presence willing to be there for someone who's in need. Their love isn't type to ignite with huge explosions, but more like gasoline poured into the never-ending flame of love.
It needs time to grow stronger and bigger, until the fire is big enough for the other to finally notice it.
That's how Doelle love, and that's how their love shines.
But that also means they need time for it to finally bloom, until they are all so certain that the other is made to be for them—for the love that always feels like it's lacking something, of something spoken out loud to be heard, big enough to be seen, and noticeable enough to be touched.
For now…
Doelle sighs as they open a new page with fresh ink and pen, ready to write another letter for their own collection.
The collection named "Love for the eminence of what's yet to be ignited."
Of the gasolina pour in such love that has yet to be exploded.
.
.
.
.
.
Until then, my love.
Until my heart beats too loud and my eyes start to look around for you.
Until I'm certain of what's named between us two.
I will be the one carrying us both, all with actions that would eventually bloom.
I will be the one loving you with everything, all with words that never spoken out loud.
Tick tack slowly through my heart, to the line of thread waiting to be tied.
The flowers paint under the sign of our love.
Letting gasolina pour on us, my love.
My dear Romeo.
— Doelle.