Chapter Text

Hinata

“I think— er, well I know, that I um...I really like you…like you like you.”

Hinata just stared up at Kageyama, completely baffled by what he was hearing. In no way had he been expecting Kageyama to confess to him when he asked Hinata to wait for him after practice. Hinata had maybe thought that he wanted to have a captain and vice captain meeting with him, something volleyball related. Never did he ever think Kageyama had feelings for him.

“Yeah so...I just wanted to tell you...and I um...maybe...well how–how do you feel about me?” Kageyama finished awkwardly. Hinata watched as the tips of his ears turned bright red.

“I...I can’t…” Hinata began, still baffled.

“Oh,” Kageyama blinked, looking even more embarrassed. “I didn’t mean to make you feel—”

“No no,” Hinata quickly said. “Not— what I meant was I...I like you too.”

“Oh,” Kageyama sighed in relief.

“But…”

“But?”

“But I can’t…” Hinata said shakily. “I like someone else. Also. Like, I like you and another person.”

“Oh,” Kageyama repeated sounding dejected again. “And you like them more.”

“No that’s the thing,” Hinata said getting anxious. He had been afraid that he was going to have to explain the thing he still had no idea what it was.

Since their first year, Hinata knew he had been nursing two small crushes. One on Kageyama and one on Yachi. It wasn’t liking a boy and a girl that threw him off, it was that he liked them equally. And for a long time he had expected one to dissipate and the other to grow. But he just developed both of the crushes at the same time.

But he knew they were different. Hinata liked them the same amount but they still felt like different feelings. His crush on Kageyama felt like strong hands and hard bodies and deep kisses, while his crush on Yachi felt like soft whispers and lingering hugs and gentle touches. And he knew deep down he wanted them both equally, but he also knew explaining that out loud sounded crazy.

“I like you the same,” Hinata said hoping to sound sure of himself. “I really like you, like like like you, but I also like like the other person. And I’m just confused.”

“I see,” Kageyama nodded quietly, his hands self consciously tightening their grip on his gym bag.

“But...but I do like you Kageyama,” Hinata said softly. “And...and I’m really happy that I know that you like me.” He smiled up at Kageyama who gave him a small grin back.

“I’m...I’m happy to know that you like me too,” Kageyama admitted.

They just smiled up at each other and Hinata felt the hot coiling in his gut that he often felt when he looked at Kageyama. Part of him wanted just to accept Kageyama’s confession and date him and push aside all his feelings for Yachi to the side. He knew that he would be happy with Kageyama and that they would love each other and never stop. But that hot coiling in his gut felt lonely without the fluttering in his chest he got when he was with Yachi. And he knew that though he would be happy with Kageyama, he would always think about Yachi.

“Kageyama I…” Hinata wasn’t sure how to begin. He knew what he had to tell Kageyama, he just wasn’t sure if he knew how to say it. “I really like you, but I can’t...I can’t date you.”

“Ok,” Kageyama nodded meekly.

“I just need to figure out my feelings first,” Hinata said, his voice wavering.

“I understand,” Kageyama said like it saddened him to say.

“But I really do like you,” Hinata said touching his hand to Kageyama’s arm. Kageyama looked up at him and gave him the soft smile he had grown into since Hinata met him.

“Can...can I still walk with you?” Kageyama asked uncharacteristically insecurely.

“Yeah of course,” Hinata smiled. “We’re still best friends right?”

“Of course,” Kageyama nodded.

Figuring out his feelings turned out to be a lot harder than Hinata originally thought. He should have known that something that had plagued his thoughts for years wasn’t going to be settled in a few weeks. But Hinata had hoped that conformation of Kageyama’s feelings for him would have helped put some things in perspective. But he only felt more confused than ever.

Every practice felt even more excruciating between small glances with Kageyama and longing stares at Yachi. Hinata wanted to scream and push away all of his feelings. But then Kageyama would wipe his face with bottom of his Tshirt and Hinata’s brain would short circuit at the sight of his slick abs. Or Yachi would skip over handing him a clean towel and a water bottle and his mouth would run dry from her overwhelming cuteness.

It felt like there was nothing Hinata could do. He had racked his brain for almost a month trying decide the best course of action; whether or not to tell Yachi how he felt about her. Eventually a decision was made for him.

“Um Hinata?” Yachi asked as Hinata unlocked his bike from the bike rack by the gate of the school. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

“Yeah sure,” Hinata said putting the chain in the small basket on his handlebars. He turned to Kageyama who was waiting next to him unsure if he should go or wait. “Um you can go on ahead, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Ok,” Kageyama said giving a quick look between them before walking away.

“What did you want to talk to me about?” Hinata asked wheeling his bike over to the gate where Yachi was fidgeting with her blazer.

“Um...I’m not exactly sure how to say this,” she said biting her lower lip. Yachi gave a quick glance around to make sure they were all alone before speaking again. “I… I really like you!”

“Wait what.”

“I really like you Hinata and I want to know if you can accept my feelings for you,” Yachi concluded in a rush. Hinata watched her cheeks burn an attractive pink.

“Yachi I…” Hinata began feeling the usual fluttering in his stomach that he gets from Yachi beginning. “I really like you too.”

“Really?” Yachi asked excitedly.

“Yeah,” Hinata nodded.

“That’s...wow, I’m so happy!”

“I know, me too but…”

“But what?” she asked, her excitement deflating.

“I like someone else too,” Hinata said having déjà vu.

“Oh?” Yachi said looking heartbroken.

“I mean I like you, I like you a lot— like a lot a lot,” Hinata clarified. “But I also like someone else just as much…”

“Is it Kageyama?” she asked carefully.

“How...how did you know?” Hinata blinked in shock.

“I just had a feeling is all,” Yachi smiled.

“Is it obvious?” Hinata cringed thinking about all the younger members on the team and how they probably talk about the two Captains and their feelings for each other.

“Not super obvious,” Yachi said delicately. “But I kinda guessed he liked you.”

“He does,” Hinata squirmed in place. “And I really like him too. But I like you the same amount. And I thought I would figure everything out but I’m only getting more and more confused.”

“Have you told him all this too?” Yachi asked.

“More or less,” Hinata sighed. “I just feel…”

“Feel what?”

“Like I’m going to end up hurting one of you guys,” Hinata frowned sadly. “And that’s the last thing I want to do. And I don’t think I can’t just choose one of you know that I know I could have something with either of you. I just...I like you both,” he finished weakly.

“I understand,” Yachi nodded. Hinata laughed softly. “What?”

“Nothing, it’s just that Kageyama said the same thing,” Hinata smiled. “You guys are too tolerant of my bullshit.”

“Your feelings are not bullshit,” Yachi said shaking her head. “It’s important for you to figure out how you feel and I’m willing to wait to find out.”

“What if I never figure it out?” Hinata whispered worriedly. “What if I never know how I feel?”

“I’m willing to wait to find out,” Yachi smiled.

Having his feelings out in the open was surprisingly liberating for Hinata. Now that he no longer had to hide his feelings for both Kageyama and Yachi, he was much more free with how he felt. Gone were the days where he would restrain himself around them, hoping neither would notice how much he liked them. He could now openly flirt with them and be however much affectionate as he wanted to be. And he loved it.

Hinata would drape himself over Kageyama’s lap during lunch watching the tips of his ears burn and redden. He’d place his hand on the small of Yachi’s back as they stood listening their coach. On the bus rides back he’d lean on Kageyama’s shoulder, sometimes threading their fingers together. And when Hinata would walk Yachi to her bus stop, he’d hold her hand and place a kiss on the back of her hand before he left.

It wasn’t until the end of the school year that Hinata actually came to the startling conclusion of what he really wanted.

The three of them laid on the grassy knoll a few minutes away from the school. They had no more practice and they were a week from graduating. All their university plans were pushed out to the back of their mind as they laid on a small blanket Yachi had brought for this very purpose. Hinata lay in his back with his head on Kageyama’s chest, his left hand loosely threading with Kageyama’s, and had Yachi resting her head on his chest, his right hand slowly playing with her hair. He felt so content and at peace had hadn’t realized he’d said it aloud until the other two reacted.

“I wish I could just be with the both of you,” Hinata said softly.

Almost immediately Yachi lifted her head and Kageyama leaned up to look at Hinata. Looking between the two of them, it finally dawned on Hinata what he had said. Quickly sitting up, Hinata desperately tried to think of something to say to backtrack.

“Um I mean I…” Hinata stumbled, not sure what to say.

“Actually Hinata,” Yachi began carefully. He looked up at her. She had moved next to Kageyama, who was sitting up next to her looking just as nervous as Hinata felt. “Kageyama and I have been talking. And we have a plan— well more of a suggestion really.”

“Really?” Hinata asked.

“Yeah,” Yachi nodded, looking more and more nervous. “We were thinking that maybe you could date the both of us?” Hinata just stared at her blankly. “Like I’d be your girlfriend and Kageyama would be your boyfriend. We’d share you, sort of.”

“And...and you guys would be willing to do that?” Hinata asked in awe. “For me?”

“We’d be willing to do anything for you,” Kageyama said almost under his breath. Hinata felt his heart practically burst with happiness.

“We’ve talked about it a lot and we think we are ok with it,” Yachi said looking up at Kageyama for support who nodded back at her. “We really want to try. And if being with you means all three of us, then we are willing to do that.”

“Really?” Hinata asked excitedly. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “When...when did you guys talk about this?”

“Yachi came up to me after she confessed to you,” Kageyama said. “But we came up with the idea together.”

“Actually Kageyama found the polyamorous relationship article online,” Yachi smiled looking up at him. Hinata saw Kageyama’s face blush with embarrassment and he found it infinitely endearing.

“I… I didn’t think you’d be happy with just one of us,” Kageyama admitted quietly. “Maybe if you dated both of us, at the same time, you wouldn’t have to choose unless you wanted to.”

“I don’t want to have to choose,” Hinata shook his head. “I like you both equally.”

“And we like you,” Yachi smiled.

“And you guys are ok with this?” Hinata asked.

“We wouldn’t have suggested it if we didn’t want to try,” Yachi said confidently.

“Ok,” Hinata grinned. “Yeah, let’s do it. We can figure out as we go along.”

“Of course,” Yachi smiled back. “Right Kageyama?”

“Yes,” Kageyama nodded.

“Wow,” Hinata breathed looking between Kageyama and Yachi. “You’re my partners. Like my actual girlfriend and my actual boyfriend. I never thought that would happen.”

It took Hinata about a week to realize that their new situation was real. And about a month to realize they were all ok with it. At first Hinata would try to keep the two relationships separate, to make them feel like they were each it’s own valuable and important entity. But that became very draining very quickly.

He tried splitting his time equally between his two partners. First he’d go on a date with Yachi, they’d go to the park and walk around and talk and sit on the swings and Hinata would hold her hand, and when he walked her home he’d kiss her goodbye. Then the next day he’d go on a date with Kageyama and they’d go to the arcade and they would get into a competition to see who’d win the most tickets and Kageyama would win but he would buy Hinata a stuffed animal with his winnings and when Kageyama would walk him home he’d kiss him goodbye. And that worked. For a week.

But then Hinata began to miss Yachi while he was with Kageyama, and he’d began to wish Kageyama was there when he was with Yachi. And he felt horrible. But he knew it wasn’t that he didn’t want who he was with at the moment, it was that he wanted them both at the same time, all the time.

“Ok guys,” Hinata said settling back on his bed. “I wanted you both here today so I could talk to you. Both of you. At the same time.”

“Ok…” They said in unison from their seat on either side of him on the bed.

“Alright, so um… we started this whole… three people thing so that I could be with both of you.”

“Right…” they said.

“But that’s the thing,” Hinata frowned. “I don’t feel like I’m with both of you.”

“Are we doing something wrong?” Kageyama asked looking concernedly at Yachi who wore a similar expression of concern.

“Are we making you feel pressured?” Yachi asked.

“No no, it’s not you guys, it’s me—”

“Are you breaking up with us?” Kageyama asked.

“No! Will you just listen!?” Hinata shouted. “I...I want to date you both. Like at the same time. Like I want to go on dates all together. I don’t like not spending time with the both of you. You’re both my partners and I want to date you both all at once.”

“So...you want us all three to date?” Kageyama asked sharing a look with Yachi.

“Well...kinda yeah,” Hinata nodded. “At least I want to date the both of you.”

“...ok,” they agreed.

“So how… How do we do this?” Kageyama asked.

“Um...like this I guess,” Hinata said pushing Kageyama to lay down on the bed. He pressed his back against Kageyama’s front and then pulled Yachi to lay on her side with her back to him. As they got comfortable and adjusted to the slightly tight arrangement, Hinata felt Kageyama slip his hands around his waist as he settled his hand on Yachi’s hip. “We can make this work,” he smiled as the warmth of his two partners made him drift off to sleep.