Work Text:
After the Cold War, tensions between the United States and Russia had intensified, but in suspicious ways. It was no longer like before when the United States had to be constantly on guard against Russia because of the imminent threat, whether it wanted to beat them in the space race or use any other methods to harm American citizens.
But that was only in the political sphere. The representatives were noticing a strange tension. Now, the United States felt a little uncomfortable when someone approached Russia or nervous when they stared too long. But that wasn't the strangest thing.
The strangest thing was the arrival of a letter at the US office. Intrigued, he asked who sent it, but... no one knew. Knowing it had already been reviewed before it arrived, he decided the best thing to do was open it. But the problem was, it was in pieces, which is why the secretary who handed it to him was so intrigued. He thought it might be a prank by his allies, so he simply threw the pieces in a drawer so he could finish his hamburgers.
Time passed, and the letter intrigued the United States, so he decided to piece it together to see what it could be.
He was worried it might be a threat to his country and that it had been sent to him as proof that he couldn't do anything, so, being the hero, he had to save his country.
He spent days trying to put it together because the writing was illegible and some parts were missing. When he finally managed, he realized it said:
"To the object of my affection, United States:
I decided to write this letter because I can no longer bear this feeling that's eating me up inside. I can only think of you, and I know I might be misinterpreting everything, but I feel that you feel the same way about me—that is, love. That's what motivates me to write this. I need to know if I'm right so I can know how to proceed. I made this letter difficult to decipher, and that also applies to the person who wrote it, so I can see if you're as interested in me as I am in you.
Sender clue: álbum estación central de "Los prisioneros" en vivo canción número 27 (me refiero al nombre de la canción)
Goodbye united states, good Luck"
United States was very surprised, but when he got to the end, he was very disappointed. He thought he could figure out who his admirer was. He knows it's difficult since it could be anyone—I mean, who wouldn't be attracted to him, isn't it?—but there's no way to know because he doesn't understand what it's supposed to say, and because it's in another language.
The bad thing is that he can't show it to anyone because, well, he might be a little interested in knowing who it is, and it shows.
Gathering the clues, he thinks it could be Italy or France because it sounds similar to their languages, so he calls France first. He had to wait a while before getting an answer, but when he did, he didn't let him speak and told him about the letter and the strange clues.
"You certainly have some passionate secret admirers, but unfortunately, I can't help you. I have no idea what the letter says."
United States realizes that France is useless, so he decides to investigate on his own. First, he has to decipher either the handwriting or the language, and then he has to translate the rest.
The United States works intensely for a week to solve the enigma. Several people are even surprised to see that he isn't eating but is completely focused on his search. Days later, he feels he's getting closer to the answer, and his anticipation grows. He can't wait to find out who it is. When he discovers it, he blushes a little because he didn't expect it. He didn't expect someone like him to have such pure feelings. After reflecting on it, he realizes that he also wants him back, very much so. And since he made him suffer, what better way to get back at his beloved? So, he ends his letter with:
"album pure de l’artiste Lara Fabian chanson numéro 10"
He wish it had been delivered a block from his house, even with a bomb threat; the end result would have been worth it.
I couldn't wait for my beloved's surprise to arrive.
