Chapter Text
It was a surreal experience. Jamie Conway, a man who thought he had lost everything, finally held his published novel in his hands. His name, printed neatly across the cover, didn’t feel like his own. The smooth cover of the paperback felt heavy in his hands. He carefully flipped the pages, treating his book as if it were some sacred object. He brought the book to his nose, taking in the scent of the freshly-printed pages. He closed his eyes in pure bliss, feeling like the only man in the world.
I hope she’s proud of me, he thought to himself. A framed photo from his youth sat on his desk, depicting a simpler time: his two parents, healthy and smiling, his brother Michael, and Jamie. He smiled softly as he set the book down next to the photo. He took a step back, admiring the new apartment he called his own. It was smaller than his old apartment, but Jamie didn’t mind. Amanda had picked the last one out, and he needed to free himself from anything and everything that reminded him of his ex wife.
Jamie was suddenly torn from his thoughts as his phone rang. He ran to his phone, promptly answering. “Hello?”
“I just picked up a copy of your book, Coach.”
“Allagash! You bought my book?”
“Damn right. I’m proud of you.”
Jamie’s face burned as his cheeks matched the red cover of the very book they were discussing. “Thanks, Allagash.”
Tad quickly changed the subject. “You free tonight? I thought we could celebrate,” he replied, his smirk evident in his voice. “I know how much this means to you.”
“Yeah. When and where?”
“I’ll pick you up in an hour. Be ready. Look nice for me, alright?”
“See you soon, Allagash,” Jamie replied, hanging up. He changed into a nice suit almost immediately, feeling the anxiety in the pit of his stomach. He was excited, yes, but his excitement never came without a hint of anxiety. Jamie checked his hair and his tie dozens of times, wanting to look good for Tad. His heart nearly stopped when Tad finally knocked on his door.
“I know you’re in there, Coach,” Tad teased. Jamie, who was fixing his tie yet again, yelled from his room. “It’s unlocked!”
Tad entered the apartment and carefully closed the door. He liked Jamie’s new place. It felt alive. The walls were lined with bookshelves. Jamie’s favorite books adorned the shelves. Multiple genres and authors covered his walls. Fantasy, sci-fi, realistic fiction, textbooks, literary theory, and history books were all filled from cover to cover with sticky notes and annotations. Tad was pleasantly surprised by how well-read Jamie was. He met Jamie back in college, and his love for literature was obvious then too. His eyes always lit up when he described what he was reading and writing in his literature classes. Tad always found Jamie’s excitement about that sort of thing to be quite wholesome. He would be lying to himself if he said he didn’t miss it. It was a relief to see Jamie getting back into the very subject he loved. Tad walked around the apartment, eventually standing before the desk that helped produce the same novel they were celebrating. A book sat on the desk, filled only halfway with the sticky notes that Jamie took notes on. He clearly hadn’t tackled this book in its entirety yet. Tad, waiting for Jamie to finish up, decided to flip to a random page and read Jamie’s notes. He had written a lot of questions about the content of the book and the character in it. It was nothing short of impressive to see how Jamie’s mind worked while reading. He closed the book before inspecting the rest of the desk.
Tad’s eyes were drawn to the photographs. An old family photograph sat next to a photo of Tad and Jamie together at a Christmas party. They both wore these ridiculous sweaters. It was Tad’s idea. He chuckled at the thought of Jamie seeing that photo while buried in some serious work. The photos were framed and cleaned often. Tad’s eyes wandered again, finding a calendar that Jamie had written some dates on. Various appointments and meetings dotted the calendar. The novel’s release date was circled. Another date, however, caught Tad’s eye. Written in red pen and surrounded by some hearts was Tad’s Birthday. His heart raced, questioning why Jamie would have done that. What did the hearts mean?
“Hey, Tad, I’m ready!” Jamie replied, now standing behind him. Tad immediately turned around and held something out to Jamie.
“I have something for you,” he said, trying to use his usual smirk to hide the blush that was creeping onto his face. “Congratulations, Coach. There’s more to come, but this will do for now.”
Jamie took the gift into his hands and inspected it. A beautiful, deep red rose sat perfectly in his hands. “Thank you, Tad,” he said, the usual playful tone gone. His face was, once again, the same red as the rose. He found a glass to use as a makeshift vase. It would work until Jamie found something else. Nobody had flowers around since Amanda, and she wanted the vases. Jamie let her have them, not thinking he would need them.
“Do you not have anything to put it in?” Tad had asked, watching Jamie move through the apartment with the glass in his hand.
“It’s fine, Tad,” Jamie said, his eyes not meeting Tad’s.
Tad went along with it, dismissing Jamie’s claim. However, he knew he needed to get Jamie something better than a glass he once used to drink his woes away. Jamie set the glass down and approached Tad, fixing his tie one last time.
“Do I look okay?” Jamie had asked, his words teetering on self-consciousness.
Tad’s hands planted themselves firmly on Jamie’s shoulders. “You look beautiful as always, Coach. Let’s get going.” Tad was silent, thinking, before speaking again. “Bring your book with you.”
Jamie’s fingers wrapped around his book again, admiring it again. He was still in disbelief at the written words in his hands. He shook the thoughts away and returned to Tad’s right side. Tad’s fingers gently wrapped around Jamie’s slender arm, feeling the muscles tensing underneath the fabric of his clothing. Their eyes met for an extended period. For the first time in years, Tad didn’t see the grieving cocaine addict anymore. He saw a man with ambitions and a future brighter than the nightclubs Jamie used to frequent. His blue eyes were hopeful, though an air of apprehension surrounded them. Jamie was nervous about something, but he was way calmer than he was five years ago. Tad took that time to admire Jamie’s other features as well. Soft freckles dotted his face. His hair, perfectly fluffy, framed his face. Jamie’s thin lips were perfectly upturned with that beautiful smile. Tad’s eyes softened. Amanda didn’t know what she was missing. Jamie hadn’t aged much, but he grew into his features. A now twenty-nine year old Jamie Conway had the most beautiful features Tad had ever seen. Tad was no stranger to pretty faces in the city. Dreams were born and destroyed in this city: aspiring actors, singers, stage performers, models, and the like. Nobody was as captivating as Jamie was at that moment. If Tad gave in to his reckless behaviors, he would have kissed Jamie right then and there. His heart swelled with pride as Tad recalled everything that had happened to the author next to him and how far he had come. Jamie deserved everything the night had in store for him and more. Tad released Jamie’s arm, instead guiding his hand to the small of Jamie’s back. Tad’s voice was softer than usual as he started walking.
“Let’s make this a night worth remembering, Jamie.”