Archive of Our Own

It all started last night. That’s when Ilya first noticed it at least.

Shane’s demeanor had seemed off ever since he got in the car. Nothing notable to the point where Ilya felt like he should say something about it, but enough for him to raise his eyebrows a bit. It was late and they were driving from Montreal to Ottawa, which is about a two and a half hour drive. Shane was the one behind the wheel and Ilya rode passenger.

Throughout the drive Ilya offered on numerous occasions to take over just in case Shane needed a break, but Shane kept declining, saying he wanted to drive. This didn’t phase Ilya, Shane is more prone to getting really bad motion sickness so it wasn’t a surprise when he told him no, and just focused on the road.

So far, none of this is unusual.

What is unusual is Shane’s patience, more so his lack of it. Every five minutes he was huffing under his breath or complaining about something so miniscule that Ilya thought he was fucking around.

So Ilya, wanting to be a mediator for his boyfriend's “problems” , tried to solve whatever it was that was irritating him.

However, he quickly figured that only made Shane’s temper infinitely worse.

First it was the music. They have a shared driving playlist that is a mixture of songs they both like. It’s pretty mellow and easy on the ears, which is perfect for a decently long car ride, like this one. They’ve both agreed on this, but maybe Shane wasn’t in the mood for music because he had demanded for Ilya to turn the music off.

“Turn this off, it’s so loud and I almost missed my turn!”

Nothing is inherently wrong with that except for the fact that the song that was playing would be classified as a slow jam, so on what grounds could it possibly be too loud but whatever, this is Shane’s car and Shane is the one driving so he doesn’t mention anything, like how he could easily turn the music down by pressing the buttons on the steering wheel, and just turns it off himself. Problem solved.

He ignores the agitated tone laced in Shane’s voice, and just chopped it up to him being stressed out, however, it happens again when Shane says they should stop by the store to pick up groceries.

They’ll be at the cottage for a couple of weeks, so it’s better to get the grocery shopping out the way now instead of later. That also means one of them has to go inside. They don’t grocery shop together in case people start speculating on their relationship and so to prevent that, they alternate on which one goes in, and this time it’s Ilya’s turn.

Ilya stretches in his chair and lets out a deep, dramatic yawn, “Holy shit, I’m so tired.” He had fallen asleep cramped up by the window, and now his joints feel like they’re jumbled up in knots.

Shane glances towards him with an unimpressed look on his face and then rolls his eyes and goes back to driving. What the hell is his deal, Ilya thinks to himself.

“Is there something wrong?” Ilya asks, because frankly he’s so confused.

Shane chuckles to himself, but it’s clear that he doesn’t find the situation funny. He does a look over at Ilya and in the most petulant attitude Ilya has ever heard, Shane says, “Why on earth are you tired?”

Ilya is quick to defend himself. He straightens up in his seat, slowly feeling himself get worked up. “Because I had a busy day, Shane.” He’s trying to give the benefit of the doubt, but even that is starting to falter. “Is there a problem?”

What Ilya wants to say is do WE have a problem, but he also doesn’t believe he’s the issue in whatever Shane has going on.

“Nope, not at all.” Shane says popping the “p” in nope dramatically. He has an annoying smug look to his face. “Go back to sleeping.”

“Yeah, whatever.” Ilya tosses to the side, way too annoyed to fall back asleep.

The third time it happens is honestly so insignificant that it’s borderline ridiculous. At this point Ilya is almost tempted to jump out the car and walk if that will give Shane just an ounce of peace of mind.

Ilya was listening to music on his phone and Shane had ripped the earbuds out of his ears just to talk to him.

“Shane what the actual fuck is wrong with you today?”

Shane doesn’t respond to that. Instead he starts honing in on Ilya, “I kept calling your name over and over and you wouldn’t answer me. Maybe turn down your music and I wouldn’t have to do that.”

Like okay, yeah sure Ilya could turn down his music and none of this would’ve happened, but he also doesn’t think Shane had to rip out his earbuds for that though. He could’ve easily tapped Ilya on the shoulder and that would’ve worked perfectly fine.

He gives his attention to Shane since whatever he needs must be important.

“Run me through what you plan on grabbing from the store, I want to make sure everything you say is correct.”

Ilya somehow holds back that deep sigh that he oh so desperately wants to let out. At this point Shane is purposely trying to piss him off. That can only be why he’s acting like this. They’ve gone grocery shopping before, this isn’t their first rodeo. Ilya knows what he needs to grab, he knows all the organic foods and drinks Shane likes to have when they stock up like this, and he shouldn’t be surprised when Ilya’s not so strict food lifestyle gets played in the mix. But he can already tell Shane is going to say something, and frankly at this point Ilya is beyond irritated and Shane is too, both of them are not having a good time and Ilya, no longer feeling like a mediator, decides to add fuel to the fire.

He starts listing off random bullshit that he knows is going to piss Shane off.

“We definitely need energy drinks, maybe some chips and cookies. I have been craving that for a while. Oh I completely ran out of cigarettes so I need to get those too.”

It’s sarcasm, of course Ilya’s not going to waste either of their time buying things they don’t need, but the slight vein popping out of Shane’s forehead may be a sign that he’s pushing too hard.

“Is everything a fucking joke to you.”

“Yes” Ilya dead pans. He tries to play nice again by sweetening up his voice in hopes of calming down Shane because something is clearly wrong if they can’t even joke around like they always do. He wants to talk about it eventually, but not now when Shane is on the edge of strangling him.”зайчик”Bunny can you please relax, I promise to get your organic strawberries and green smoothie juice that looks like swamp water.” He places a hand on Shane’s thigh, running his fingertips on his soft skin before squeezing the thick muscle. “Now focus on driving and I will focus on shopping.”

Shane grumbles out a small “fine”, which is honestly surprising because he was expecting Shane to fire back with something harsh, but he doesn’t say anything. He remains quiet, for the entire car ride.

Even when they get home and are putting the groceries away, Shane doesn’t say anything, and the only time he does is when Ilya asks him a question, but even then his responses are short. He’s clearly not in the mood to talk, which is fine for now, but Ilya refuses to spend his vacation like this, knowing something is bothering Shane. A part of him feels bad for probably probing too hard during a time when Shane is not in a mood, but the thing that makes him doubt this is that Shane can be a very confrontational person; especially when it comes to Ilya. He’s not afraid to vocalize anything Ilya does that’s bothering him, so it really doesn’t make sense for him to keep it all inside.

At the end of the day Shane could just be tired and feeling irritable from work and just needs to rest. Maybe Ilya is overthinking everything and by tomorrow, it’s like none of this ever happened.

Yet, when Ilya wakes up first thing in the morning to an empty spot on the bed, he can tell that Shane still isn’t feeling like his usual self.

It’s bad enough that Shane already struggles with taking time off. He’s known for not relaxing when he has free time. It’s like there’s something in his head that won’t let him rest on his off day, and he can’t help it, but toppled with this unknown anger doesn’t help in the slightest.

He hops out the bed; dark, gray sweatpants sitting low on his waist with no shirt on, and makes his way down the hall and to the kitchen.

Shane was right about doing grocery shopping last night because waking up to having a full fridge stocked up is the equivalent of a kid finding out that Christmas came early. Ilya reaches for an energy drink on the side of the door, opening it to hopefully give him a final boost to wake him the fuck up. He’s not hungry at the moment, but he could definitely eat something small later and then maybe go take a shower once he finds Shane.

Looking over at the counter, he notices Shane left his water bottle. It’s still ice cold from what he can see, and there are cut up pieces of lemons, cucumbers and spearmint for his drink. He knows Shane does this for health reasons but god he’ll never understand how he can handle drinking something like this when he can just have regular water. He snatches the bottle from the counter and walks towards the center of the cottage where the sounds of soft, melodic music fill the air.

Even though it’s early, the sun is illuminating the room so beautifully. The lights in the house are turned off, and in the middle of everything is a beam of light shining in the center of Shane doing his yoga routine.

It’s hard to tell whether or not Shane can sense Ilya’s presence, so for now Ilya won’t say anything and just watch his boyfriend at work.

Shane is positioned in an elbow stand, his back is curved so one leg is pointed forward while the other leg is bent in a stag. He has his eyes closed, probably focusing on the music as he tries to hold the pose.

Ilya has attempted to do yoga with Shane before, and he means attempt because frankly yoga is not an activity that’s made for him. He knows that it can sometimes be physically inducing, especially if you’re not used to regularly stretching your body, so the first time Shane invited him to practice together he made sure to keep an open mind that this might not be his cup of tea right away and he was quickly proven right.

Minus the fact that Ilya is as stiff as a board, he also wasn’t prepared for how boring it could be.

Cardio is what he enjoys. He likes to be able to physically see and feel the sweat from an intense workout and he just doesn’t get that same euphoric feeling when he does yoga. There’s also the fact that Ilya just can’t stand the calming music Shane plays. How the hell is he supposed to break a sweat from listening to soft melodies.

He still tries to get into it if not for Shane then for Shane’s mom, Yuna. She herself does yoga and is the reason for why Shane incorporates it into his lifestyle. It’s a family hobby that’s been passed down from generations, so of course Ilya is going to participate in it every now and then, even if he doesn’t like it.

Ilya figures he has to join one of those hot yoga classes but he doesn’t want to go alone and Shane has made it clear that hot yoga isn’t for him, but maybe with some slight convincing he can make Shane reconsider.

“Are you going to join me or are you just gonna stand there and watch.” Shane’s eyes are still closed, but he speaks into the air, pulling Ilya out of his thoughts.

So he can sense his presence. Ilya thinks to himself.

“I’d rather watch,” Ilya answers truthfully. “Wouldn’t want to disrupt you when you’re working so hard.”

Shane chuckles to himself as he slowly bends his back more so the leg that’s extended out touches the floor followed by the other one. He uses the strength in his arms to push up on his hands so he’s in a bridge and then gradually lifts himself up.

“You know I can do that too,” Ilya jokes. Which is a lie. Shane knows that. Ilya knows that. Back when he used to play hockey he had no choice but to maintain a certain level of flexibility, but now he's twenty five and just doesn’t always have the time to stretch. He’s still able to touch his toes and that’s good enough for him. That’s more than what some people can do at his age.

“Sure you can.” Shane replies walking up to Ilya, getting closer to him. He has a smile plastered on his face and already he looks like he’s in a better mood in comparison to last night. He places his hands on either side of Ilya’s waist and leans in for a kiss. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Ilya responds back. His hand is freezing and damp from condensation leaking on it, and that’s when he remembers Shane’s water bottle. He brings it up to eye level for Shane to see and shakes it. “You left this on the counter.”

He attempts to hand over the water bottle, so Shane can have something to drink, but before he can do that Shane holds his mouth open, tongue out, signaling for Ilya to place the water bottle in his mouth. Ilya’s eyebrows raise up in shock as he pops open the lid, placing the tip of the straw against Shane’s tongue. This is what they call princess treatment he thinks to himself. He’s heard that word countless times on social media and could only garner up a basic idea of it, but now, standing right in front of him with his mouth open, tongue lying flat against the bottom of his pretty, pink lip, it all makes sense to him.

At the end of the day, Ilya is human therefore he is flawed, so he ignores the devious smile on Shane’s lips, and watches him slurp the water into his mouth.

Shane leans back once he’s finished. “Thank you.”

If the energy drink didn’t wake him up before, now he’s feeling energized. “Yeah of course.”

Ilya looks him up and down, trying to completely ignore how attractive his boyfriend is looking right now. He seems to be in a better mood today.

Shane steps away much to Ilya’s disappointment and squats down so he’s back on the mat in a sitting position. He extends his left leg so he can touch his toes. “Did you just wake up?”

“Yeah, about twenty minutes ago,” Ilya responds. “You left me in the room by myself, I was so lonely without you.”

“I’m sure you were perfectly fine, I bet you couldn’t tell I wasn’t there.”

“Oh but I could,” Ilya rebuttals. “Usually it’s your snoring that wakes me up. This time, it was bird noises.”

Shane denies that instantly, shaking his head, “I don’t snore.”

“Yes you do, everyone knows this. Even people all the way in Florida can hear you.”

Shane releases one of his hands on his foot to flip him off, and Ilya dramatically covers his heart like he’s wounded. Ilya continues on like Shane isn’t waiting for him to stop talking, “It’s a compliment Shane, your snores remind me of cute pigs oinking.”

Shane’s snoring isn’t that bad, it’s definitely noticeable and Ilya has been woken up by the loud noise a couple of times, but he’s heard worse before. Back when he used to play hockey and he would have to share hotels with some of his teammates, he could count on both hands the amount of sleepless nights he had. Shane is nowhere near that level but it’s always fun to tease him

“Alright asshole, I’m going to pretend like you didn’t purposely come here just to piss me off.” Not intentionally but if he has a chance to rile up Shane why wouldn’t he. “Did you eat anything yet?”

Ilya waves around his energy drink like it’s his breakfast.

“So I’m taking that as a no.” Shane switches over to his right leg to continue stretching. “What about showering, have you showered at all?”

“No, not yet. I wanted to find you first to see if you want to shower together.”

Shane nods his head at that. “Yeah, I’m cool with that, just give me ten minutes, I’m almost done, and then after we shower we can make something to eat if that’s cool with you?”

That’s perfectly fine with Ilya, he’s in no rush after all, it’s just that— and at the end of the day Ilya is no expert so he could just be seeing things— but he can tell that Shane isn’t really putting in much effort into his stretching.

Like, you can barely call what he’s doing even a stretch. Because yes he’s touching his toes and to anyone that doesn’t know him they would think it’s whatever but—

Ilya knows him and he knows Shane can do better than this, and maybe it’s because Shane is still in a sour mood, or maybe it’s the fact that he’s tired so it’s making him gloss over his workout routine, but Ilya won’t allow that. If this was any other day Ilya would not pay this any mind, but after watching Shane work so hard on his body he refuses to let him be lazy.

Shane does a fake cough, pulling Ilya’s attention away from his mind. “You know you can still join me at any time.”

As fun as that sounds, which it doesn’t in the slightest, Ilya has something better in mind. The thoughts that are forming in his head are probably stemming from the fact that he hasn’t been around Shane in so long stav for last night, so he’s really missing him more than usual, and he’s really feeling an extra bit touch starved, which is why he walks behind Shane, who’s still doing his stretches (if you can even call it that), and crouches down behind him so his chest is pressed to Shane’s back and he places two soft kisses on Shane’s neck for comfort that has Shane instantly flinching.

“What are you—” but Shane’s voice breaks into a startled gasp as Ilya leans forward so his chest is pushing against Shane’s lower back, so he can have a deeper stretch. He can feel where Shane is trying to push back against him probably, because he can feel the tightness in his back and legs, and that’s good. That means there’s a pull in what he’s feeling.

“I’m helping.” Ilya checks to make sure Shane is okay before pushing more. “I can tell you’re rushing your stretches.” His chin is resting on Shane’s shoulder, crowding his space. He convinces himself that he needs to be this close to Shane so he’s sure that he’s doing his stretches correctly.

Shane’s chest is now pressed to his knee, and from this position his voice sounds muffled and rigid. Like he’s underwater.

Even when he’s bent like a pretzel he still finds a way to complain. “Who gives a fuck, I thought you wanted me to shower with you?”

He feels Shane trying to come up but the weight of Ilya’s body on his back is stronger as he keeps him back down in place. “Hold for fifteen more seconds.”

Shane groans, but nonetheless follows Ilya’s orders. His back rises up and down as he slowly breathes through the pain, concentrating on trying to hold out as much as possible. Once Ilya thinks he’s good, he wraps an arm around Shane’s chest, the other hand grabbing Shane’s shoulder and he gradually pulls him right back up in his original sitting position.

“Okay redo the other leg.” Ilya says, tapping Shane’s left leg.

"I already did it.” Shane replies, turning around to look at Ilya. His voice is firm like he doesn’t plan on budging.

“Yeah, I saw, and it was a very shitty job, so do it again, but this time better.”

Shane’s eyes practically roll in the back of his head as he extends his left leg out. “You’re so annoying.”

“Yes we’ve established this.”

Shane turns around to scowl at Ilya, like that’s all of a sudden going to get him out of doing this.

Ilya lazily runs his fingers up and down along his spine. “You know if you dropped the attitude you would’ve been finished by now.”

“You know if you dropped the attitude you would’ve been finished by now,” Shane mimics in a high pitched voice. “Fuck you.” He mumbles as he goes to touch his toes.

Ilya doesn’t say anything as he holds back a laugh. He carefully pushes down on Shane’s back making sure to not overly do it. His left leg isn’t as flexible as his right leg, so there’s a bit of resistance from Shane, which is to be expected. He counts aloud to forty-five and releases from Shane.

Shane kisses his teeth as he turns back around to look at Ilya. His eyebrows are pinched down, with a frown on his face. “You know you can count in your head, right. Yoga is meant to be done in silence, if you couldn’t tell.”

“Oh? Is that why you have music playing right now?" Ilya says, pointing to the stereo on the table. “Music is still noise if you couldn’t tell.” Ilya throws out, repeating Shane’s words at him.

The same scowl repeats on Shane’s face and Ilya is almost tempted to kiss it off. “Alright on your back now.”

Shane side-eyes him, but still moves to lay on his back anyway, and now he’s flat against the mat, with his knees pointed to the sky and hands resting flat against his chest. “What am I doing now?”

Ilya doesn’t answer right away, instead he slides between Shane’s legs, and using one hand he places it on the back of Shane’s thigh, pushing until his knee is resting by his chest in a laid down lunge. Shane gasps from the initial shock of being manhandled straight into the position.

The air around them feels more intimate than usual when Ilya crowds closer into Shane’s space. Their foreheads are touching, and Shane feels the first swoosh swirl in the pit of his stomach. So many thoughts are racing through his head, the one being why is Ilya so adamant about Shane completing his yoga routine and two,

Can Ilya please stop touching him like that, it’s really distracting.

It becomes hard to speak when he looks up at Ilya through his peripherals, sweat seeping from his hairline and he sees Ilya’s eyes travel down to where that bead of sweat slowly trickles down past his ear, disappearing in his neck.

His eyes grow sharper and with a better grip Ilya moves his hand up to the back of Shane’s knee and pushes a lot more. “You can feel it, right Shane?” Ilya asks.

Shane’s eyes open up wide as he scans every single spot on Ilya's face. He swallows thickly, not really knowing how to answer that, “Huh?”

“The stretch,” Ilya further explains. He switches over to the other leg, hiking it up to Shane’s chest. Shane holds it for him, giving Ilya the opportunity to run his hand along the upper part of his hamstring. “You can feel it right here, yes? This is how it’s supposed to feel,зайчик.”bunny.”

Shane once again doesn’t say anything, as he stares up at Ilya. His eyes look more watery than usual and he can tell his heart rate increases with the way short breaths leave his mouth. The air around them feels thick and heavy and it doesn’t help that the humidity in Canada is strong this morning.

Ilya knows what he’s doing by not allowing any space between them.

He’s not playing fair and he knows it, but he also doesn’t care. Shane has been acting up for the last twenty four hours, so it’s nice seeing Shane’s crankiness slowly absolve from him.

He pulls away from Shane’s space and in one swift motion flips him over so Shane is flat on his stomach. He leans over mouth pressed to Shane’s ear, “Go into a split.”

“Ilya,” Shane complains.

“Перестань жаловаться.””Stop complaining.” The sooner you do this the sooner we can shower.”

He half expects Shane to whine some more. He can still see a bit of defiance in his eyes like he’s ready to push Ilya some more, which Ilya welcomes with open arms because he’s prepared to push Shane back. But there’s nothing. No snide remarks, no cursing under his breath or angry facial expressions. Shane doesn’t look exhausted, but all that fighting plus his workout must be taking a toll on his mind and body because he slowly seats himself, legs stretched out in a “v”, and using his hip muscles he pushes himself forward until he’s sitting in a middle split.

Ilya makes quick work to put his hands on his thighs, straightening out the split to make sure it’s perfect.

Ilya has to hold back a breath as he watches Shane all splayed out in a split. He knows he shouldn’t feel surprised, Shane worked hard for his flexibility and it’s not like it’s the first time he’s ever seen Shane do a split before, but still. It has his body running hot at just how easily nimble Shane is, and he wants to see more of his flexibility.

And it’s like Shane can read his mind because without any hesitation he immediately lowers himself down so his chest is touching the floor, arms extended out in front of him, reaching the fullest of the stretch. He tucks his head into the mat, probably concentrating on trying to not lift his hips up. Even though he stretched a decent amount prior to this, it’s still a lot to maintain a middle split, especially at his age.

Ilya has to give him props for that, so he does.

He rubs along Shane’s back, trying to soothe him as much as possible. “You’re doing so good baby, look at you.” Ilya praises him in awe.

“Thanks.”

‘Does this hurt at all?”

“No I just— can you press down on my waist please.”

Of course he can, he doesn’t have to ask Ilya twice. He places both hands on Shane’s waist and leans his weight, and mentally moans when Shane doesn’t complain. He’s completely still as if he’s not holding Ilya’s entire weight on his hips.

Ilya hovers over Shane’s body, still maintaining the weight on his lower hips as he watches Shane’s face, and from this angle Shane’s head is now tilted, his eyes are closed and his cheeks are flushed pink.

He looks peaceful like this, almost like he’s sleeping.

Ilya brings one of his hands to Shane’s hair, combing out the strands covering his face. His hair is longer than usual. Shane was growing it out for a role and wound up loving the length. So does Ilya. He loves when Shane feels confident enough to try new things with his appearance.

‘Holy shit,” Ilya mumbles to himself, Shane hasn’t once tried to get up.

“Hmm?”

He didn't realize he said that outloud, instead of repeating what he said he decides to check in on Shane. “You still with me, sweetheart?”

Shane licks around his mouth, wetting his lips, “Yeah.”

A small part of Ilya wants to keep going, to see how long Shane can stay like this until he’s fidgeting on the ground. Shane’s physical ability is always so impressive to see, and the added layer of him being pliable is mixing in beautifully with the way Ilya is feeling right now.

Ilya isn’t new to this. The feeling he gets when Shane becomes extra sweet around him. He removes himself from Shane’s back, and stands up so he’s in front of him. Ilya extends both arms out and Shane easily takes them to help him on his feet.

They make their way to the bathroom, Ilya draped over Shane, and it’s less of them walking and more like they’re waddeling, which is definitely not sufficient, but neither of them seem to care. Ilya tucks his face into Shane’s neck where his natural scent is more potent now with sweat, this should be gross, but it’s actually the opposite. He kisses along the damp, salty skin.

They separate once they’re in the bathroom with Shane going to sit on the counter and Ilya turning the faucet to the shower on. He makes sure the temperature is set very warmly. Ilya prefers the water to be lukewarm; especially when the weather is hot as opposed to Shane who likes a very hot shower year round, so they settle for something in the middle.

As he turns around he notices Shane is leaning with his back pressed to the mirror. He no longer looks exhausted, the opposite actually. He has a small glint in his eye as he looks over at Ilya.

“What is it,” Ilya asks, initiating the conversation since Shane doesn’t seem to want to.

“Nothing,” Shane answers briefly. He eyes Ilya up and down and then straightens up a little. With a smirk on his face he beckons Ilya over with a hand, “Come here for a second.”

Ilya, who’s clearly skeptical, makes his way over. He stands in between Shane’s thighs and lets his hands rest on the soft skin. Shane rests his hands on Ilya’s shoulders, smiling down on him. All the petulance from earlier is practically gone now, he looks so at ease now. He’s happy, grinning so widely, and that internally fills Ilya with pride. He likes knowing that he can be a source of support for Shane, even if Shane doesn’t directly ask for it.

Shane attempts to lean down for a kiss but Ilya stops him by putting a hand on his chest, halting his movement. Shane’s eyebrows scrunch up in confusion as he tries to figure out what the issue is, but Ilya is already starting the conversation “Don’t you think we should talk first?”

“Talk about what?” Shane asks and he looks genuinely confused.

“How you were acting earlier, especially last night. Something is bothering you.” Ilya states affirmatively.

“I don't know what you mean.” Shane goes to kiss Ilya again, but Ilya still isn’t having it, and puts a bit more pressure on Shane’s chest to stop him.

“Shane, you have cursed me out so much today and yesterday and I don’t understand why.”

Shane is quick to respond back, “No I haven’t.”

Now that has Ilya clicking his teeth. He literally has, and Ilya is used to it from time to time because it’s a part of Shane’s vernacular, but all the time? Especially over minor inconveniences? Ilya’s patience is running thin, and Shane, either one, doesn’t seem to catch on to that, or two doesn’t care to realize that. “Shane, you were just doing so well earlier, please don’t play dumb with me right now.”

It’s blunt, direct, and harsh but Ilya doesn’t care at all. He’s so over this.

“Fuck you, don’t be rude to me,” Shane chides, pointer finger digging accusingly into Ilya’s chest.

“Sweetheart I’m not trying to be but you’re literally acting like a—“ and it’s at this moment when Ilya finally connects the dots. From the way Shane keeps cursing him out, to him being irritable over the smallest things Ilya does, and not to mention how all of that pent up anger subsides as soon as Ilya touches him.

Ilya may not be good at math, but two plus two will always equal four, and right now everything is slowly adding up. He doesn’t finish his sentence when the answer is looking at him in the world's deadliest stare. Without even thinking, he grips onto Shane’s hips pulling him down so he’s pressed against the counter, standing in front of Ilya, and he maneuvers Shane’s arms so they’re behind his back, locked in place, and his other hand comes up to grip his jaw tightly. Both of them sizing each other up in a stare off.

“You wanna tell me what’s up with your attitude?”

“I already fucking told you—”

“Watch your mouth.” He squeezes Shane’s cheeks harder making his lips purse together. “It is a yes or no question.” He squeezes tighter, practically digging his finger tips in Shane’s jawline. “So either tell me yes or no.”

Silence

Shane doesn’t say anything. Not a mumble or sound leaves his squished lips. He just looks directly at Ilya and by every second his body flushes with a new shade of pink, and Ilya can feel Shane's skin running hot.

He steps forward so whatever space that was left between them is now gone and that’s when Ilya feels it.

It’s no surprise that the tension that was surrounding them earlier on the mat has made its way to the bathroom. Ilya rolls his body against Shane and is met with Shane’s half hard cock pressing against his. The pressure has Shane exhaling raggedly through his mouth, and his eyes blink rapidly at Ilya’s.

Ilya just smiles down on him like he finally has Shane cornered. “Ah now I get it.” He whispers to himself, but Shane can hear him. “This is what you need, yes?” He never lets up on the pressure on Shane’s cock still rocking into making him squirm in place. “Spent all this time testing me and for what exactly?”

Shane doesn’t say a word, but his big, brown eyes bore daggers into Ilya’s. Using the hand that’s still digging into Shane’s jaw he shakes him around a bit, trying to get him to talk. “Come on Shane, use your words and tell me what you want.”

Shane still remains silent. Ilya pulls back a bit to glance at him. “зайчикBunny doesn’t want to listen I see. That’s okay.” And truly he means it, because he will get Shane to talk one way or another, he’s persistent like that.

He steps away from Shane, and begins to strip down until he’s naked and the smile that forms on Shane’s face quickly gets wiped when he sees Ilya heading over to the shower, and not towards the bedroom.

“Come on, let’s shower now.” Ilya ignores the fact that he’s hard too and wants more than anything to take Shane right here and right now and make him feel so good despite the fact he’s been a brat for the last 48 hours.

They hop in the shower together and wash off as quickly as possible. Normally they would help each other out, but not this time, so they clean off in silence and it feels like the longest eight minutes of Ilya’s life.

Ilya is the first one to leave, toweling off his hair first and then his body. Shane follows quickly behind, and looking closely, Ilya can see the little droplets of water clinging to Shane’s clavicle as it slowly rolls down his torso. Shane is truly a sight to be seen, it’s a miracle that Ilya was able to hold himself back for the past hour because now he can feel the last bit of restraint he has quickly dissolved.

Before Shane can wrap the towel around himself, Ilya is grabbing him by the waist, pulling Shane against him so they’re face to face, and kisses him. Shane grips the back of his arms for support. Ilya’s hands wander down his waist to the back of his thighs, trying to lift him. Shane gets the hint and instantly jumps and wraps his legs around Ilya’s waist and together they walk to their bedroom, neither of them breaking away from the kiss. Shane tastes like his drink from earlier, which should deter Ilya away, but it doesn’t. Lemons and mint in a drink are gross, but suddenly when it’s on Shane’s tongue it’s the best thing Ilya has ever tasted. It makes him kiss Shane harder.

Ilya’s shins hit the bed frame and they fall together, Ilya on top of Shane. The soft mattress feels nice and cool on their skin; especially after being in their sauna-like bathroom. Ilya, being in between Shane’s legs, scoots them up so they’re closer to the headboard and Shane makes himself comfortable by resting his head on the pillow.

That’s really good, Shane better get as comfortable as possible because Ilya is about to put him through the best and worst torture humanly imaginable.

Ilya first places a hand on his jaw like he did earlier in the bathroom, and makes Shane look directly at him. With his other hand he spits on it and lets his hand fall to Shane’s dick. It starts off slow with Ilya gliding his hand leisurely along Shane’s cock in a loose grip so he doesn’t come quickly. Shane looks down as best he can as he watches Ilya stroke him. Ilya’s big hand wrapped around his thick cock, he’s not even doing anything profound or intricate with his movements, but the sight is enough to have Shane gaping his mouth open like a fish out of water. It’s already starting to feel overwhelming like a simmering fire is heating beneath his skin.

“Baby?” His breath starts to increase rapidly, he’s not close yet, but he could be if Ilya speeds up a little more. “Baby baby baby.” He tries to touch Ilya’s wrist in hopes of making him go faster but Ilya lets go of his face to grab his hand and puts it above Shane’s head to stop him.

His eyes bore into Shane’s, not in terms of anger but more stern. “Don’t touch unless I tell you, do you understand?”

Shane understands loud and clear but he really doesn’t care. Not when his soul feels like it’s about to burst out of his body. It’s been so long since they’ve touched like this and that familiar feeling boiling in the pit of his stomach is making him go restless in his spot.

He tries to control every muscle in his body begging him to not cum but it’s futile. His legs begin to shake as he bucks into Ilya’s fist to set his own rhythm. However, that's still not enough. Shane’s face contorts in agony from not being able to calm his need to come.

“Oh my god just go faster.”

Ilya does the opposite, if Shane thought he was already going slow, this time it feels like his hand is barely moving.

“You know,” Ilya starts. “You have been so mean and bossy to me all day. Cussing me out, nagging me, it’s very annoying don’t you think?” This is all rhetorical because Ilya doesn’t give Shane the chance to respond, instead he gets closer so their lips are almost touching and he speaks into Shane’s mouth. “So now we are going to do things my way.”

Shane whines in confusion, tossing his head from side to side against the pillows in frustration, “Ilya what the fuck are you even talking about.”

“Aht, I just told you earlier to not cuss at me, and you just did it again, do you think that’s nice.” This time Ilya gives Shane a chance to respond.

“I’m sorry?”

It comes out as a question, because frankly Shane doesn’t even know what he’s supposed to say, all he knows is that he wants Ilya to make him come and he’s not doing that right now.

Ilya has a smile on his face, but it’s not his usual happy smile. It’s the kind of smile he wears when he knows something that the other person doesn’t.

He moves over to whisper in Shane’s ear. “Yes you will be.”

He mouths over Shane’s neck, laving over the slightly salty skin like it’s the best thing Ilya’s ever tasted, and it could be all in his head from not seeing Shane in so long but Shane tastes so heavenly.

Shane arches his back and gasps as Ilya leaves open mouth kisses on the side of his neck, and all Shane wants to do is dig his hands in his hair to press him deeper, but he’s not able to. Ilya’s hands are still wrapped around Shane’s wrists in such a vice grip that it is practically impossible for Shane to get out of. Granted, if Shane really wanted to he could, but there’s something mentally that’s making him feel helpless under Ilya’s touch.

Ilya makes his way up to Shane’s mouth and slots their lips together in a heated kiss that already has Shane whimpering. Ilya kisses Shane deeply, slipping his tongue inside his mouth, and Shane takes that as his cue to run his tongue against Ilya’s. It’s a mind numbing type of pleasure being with someone who knows how to kiss well, and having Ilya as a partner is proof of that. He deepens the kiss more, making Shane sink in the pillows at the sheer power of his kisses.

The wet smacking sounds of their lips fill the room along with their heavy breathing. Ilya takes Shane’s bottom between his teeth tugging on the plush muscle just the way Shane likes it. It’s messy and wet with saliva coating both of their lips, and Shane can feel where he’s slowly starting to leak from how intense this all feels. To be kissed in such a way that has you losing your mind.

Shane rolls his hips up to search for any type of relief against his achingly, hard dick, which he realizes is not okay when Ilya breaks the kiss.

A wet string of saliva is connecting their lips as Ilya speaks, “Quit moving.”

Shane doesn’t stop, not when he’s so close, “I can’t help it.”

“You wanna come?” Shane nods his head, but Ilya wants to hear words instead of actions, “Speak up, I don't know what that means.”

Exasperated in the moment, Shane gives in. “Fuck, yes, Ilya please.”

Ilya smiles down at him and leaves a loud peck at the side of his cheek. “That’s all you had to say.” He makes his way down his body, stopping at his chest first. Ilya takes Shane’s nipple in his mouth.

“Oh shit,” Shane groans. His arms are still above his head but only this time Ilya’s hands are keeping him in place, he’s doing this all on his own. He watches as Ilya switches to the other nipple, licking and sucking the sensitive area until it turns a pretty rouge color.

Shane grasps with one hand at the pillow above, needing something to ground him. “That feels so fucking good.”

Ilya hums at the praise and then travels down to his stomach giving him the same treatment he did earlier to his neck and chest. Nipping and pulling anywhere he can get his teeth on, and he can feel Shane underneath him vibrating. He pauses once he’s eye level with Shane’s cock, it’s resting hard against Shane’s navel.

Ilya breathes on Shane’s cock, while looking at him and his cock twitches against his stomach as he dribbles precum everywhere.

“You’re such a mess right now Shane.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm.” He takes Shane straight in his hand and drools directly on Shane’s tip and runs his hand up and down until his dick is coated in saliva. “So fucking beautiful.”

Ilya’s thumbs the head of his cock smearing the saliva and precum together to make him appear extra wet and Shane gasps at the lewd sight of it.

He tries to bring a hand to Ilya’s to make him move faster but remembers that he’s not allowed to and lets his hand fall to the bed, “Fuck, please.”

Ilya likes when Shane becomes like this. When he’s being all sweet and polite and using his please and thank yous when he wants Ilya to do something for him. Shane being vocal about his needs in the bedroom isn’t new, even when he’s being a brat.

Ilya licks from the bottom of Shane’s dick all the way to the top slowly and then engulfs half of him in one go. He uses his hand to stroke the part of Shane that’s not in his mouth and in tandem his mouth and hand meet as he sucks his way down his dick. Drool starts to pool out of his mouth and on his hand. He doesn’t break a sweat though when he looks up to see Shane shaking and shuddering all over.

He mouths at Shane’s sensitive tip, causing him to grasp tightly at the bedsheets. “Oh shit.”

At a particular suck, Shane’s body shoots up in a perfect arch and then falls helplessly back in the sheets. His dark, bronzy eyes are completely glazed over in pure want, and all Shane can do is think, breathe, and feel Ilya.

Ilya pulls off quickly to jerk him off in steady motions. He runs delicate kisses along Shane’s thighs, and then mumbles against them, “It’s okay, you can touch me now sweetheart.”

And just like that, Shane’s hands cling on to Ilya’s curls like it’s his one and only life line. He threads and pulls his hair grateful that he has something to grasp on to while his body convulses. “Holy f-fuck Ilya I’m so close.”

Ilya’s heartbeat is booming out of his chest, but that doesn’t falter him in the slightest. He hums along the thick cock in his mouth like he gets how Shane feels. He can sense that he’s getting close and is about to come any second now, and only focuses on the tip, licking and sucking on it to pull any kind of sound out of Shane.

“Oh shit—” Shane’s abs cave in as he crunches up. All of a sudden his body feels like he’s being rung tight and he has to grasp on to Ilya’s hair as tightly as possible, to the point where it feels like he’s going to have strands in his palms. “Oh fuck I think I’m gonna— you’re gonna make me fucking—”

But he’s cut off when Ilya pulls off of him with a pop, and his rock hard cock makes a wet slapping sound against his stomach.

Shane knows what’s happening right now, Ilya is about to edge the fuck out him. He looks down at his weeping cock leaking more precum messily everywhere and he truly doesn’t know how long he can keep this up for. Shane doesn’t like to have his orgasm denied. Every now and then it’s fine, because the build up to after waiting to come feels so mind boggling insane that there’s been a few times he’s passed out from it, but this is something he enjoys once in a blue moon.

He’d rather be made to cum over and over again than to hold it in, especially when this is the first time in a while since Ilya’s touched him, and he knows Ilya isn’t going to go easy on him when Shane has purposefully pissed him off.

“No no no, please don’t stop.” Shane sits up so he’s on direct level with Ilya, and grabs at his arms, begging him to touch anywhere on his body, but Ilya’s already shushing him with kisses all over his face.

“Shush, it’s okay, you are fine I promise.” but Shane is whimpering and shaking like a kicked puppy in the cold. This isn’t fair and he knows Ilya is going to be mean and drag this on for as long as possible. Ilya runs his thumb along Shane’s bottom lip, and Shane instantly reads his mind and takes the digit in his mouth and suckles on it. “You’re being so good to me, always so sweet when you become like this, just be patient okay.”

Shane isn’t paying attention to anything. He can’t. Not when he’s lapping Ilya’s finger as if it were his actual dick. This satiates his needs for the time being, having Ilya’s fingers stuff his mouth so he can finally calm down for a few minutes. He bobs his forward and back, coating his finger in as much saliva as humanly possibly and then releases the finger, gasping for air.

Ilya pulls him by the chin in a chaste kiss, and mutters against his lips. “Get on top of me.”

They swap positions with Ilya laying on the bed and Shane moving to go on top of him, however, Ilya stops him dead in his tracks when he notices Shane facing towards him. “No no, turn around.”

The slow realization hits Shane, and his eyes open up wide like saucers. “Oh shit okay.” Then turns around so his back side is facing Ilya and he hovers over his waist, hands planted on Ilya’s knees.

It’s not Shane’s first time getting eaten out so Ilya doesn't know why he’s acting brand new to this. In a swift motion he pulls Shane at his hips so his ass is right above Ilya’s mouth. He holds Shane down by wrapping two arms around his waist so he doesn’t move, and licks a fat strip right over his hole. Shane groans from the initial sensation and Ilya doesn’t let up for a second.

Ilya loves oral. He loves being able to please somebody simply by the skill of his tongue. It’s a talent that he’s really proud of, because to hear Shane hiccuping from getting tongue fucked is the most beautiful sound in the world. He digs his fingers into his thighs when he feels Ilya run his thumb alongside with his tongue, slowly alternating between barely pushing his thumb inside and then back to using his tongue.

Shane’s voice breaks off into a gasp when Ilya spits directly into his hole, and Ilya hums in delight as he eats out Shane, pleased to know he’s making him feel good.

Blindly reaching over, Ilya grabs around until he comes in contact with a clear, plastic bottle. He doesn’t have to look at it to know their shared bottle of lube is less than half way gone. He pumps a dollop size amount on his fingers, rubbing them together, and then circles Shane’s hole with his pointer finger, and gently pushes inside until he’s met with some slight resistance. He pays attention to see any discomfort from Shane and when he doesn’t he keeps fingering him by pushing a quarter of the way and then teases it in and out.

Shane rolls his hips harder, pushing back on his finger to take more and being Ilya the saint that he is, helps him. He feeds his finger in Shane’s rim so it’s all the way inside of him and in that same moment Ilya feels a warm, wet mouth take his cock.

Ilya groans, head tilting back against the mattress, “Fuck sweetheart that feels so good.”

Shane moans around Ilya like he’s tasting the best thing on earth and Ilya has to fight back every ounce of him that’s begging to fuck in to Shane’s warm, dripping mouth. Shane is meticulous with it, he starts by using his tongue and mouth and suctions on the base of Ilya’s dick. He licks his way up and deepthroats him in one go, letting Ilya’s dick sit in the back of his throat.

Ilya grips tightly at Shane’s cheek and with his other hand he pushes in two fingers twisting around as he tries to focus back on giving Shane the same amount of pleasure. His voice comes out strained when his tongue traces in a vein like motion on the side of his cock, “You must love having me in your mouth, don’t you? You like choking on my dick?”

Shane garbles around his cock, he definitely said something but it came completely muffled out, but he takes that as some sort of yes. He watches from below as Shane sucks his fingers in and out of his hole, in thrall with how he’s doing all the work by rocking back and forth.

The plump part of his ass tenses up, and Shane removes his mouth from Ilya, babbling against his cock. “Baby you can fuck me now.”

Ilya smacks his ass, the noise ringing out strongly and Shane’s breath hitches.

He looks over at Ilya pleading with the most beautiful, sparkling eyes he’s ever seen. He bites his bottom lip and releases it with a whine when Ilya slips three fingers in, filling him up. “Shit please don’t stop.”

Ilya chuckles against the thick part of his ass, “First you tell me to fuck you and now you’re telling me to not stop.“Что я должен делать?””So what should I do?”

“Делай со мной всё, что захочешь.”Do whatever you want with me.”

It’s like a sudden boost of adrenaline courses through Ilya. One moment Shane is sitting on his chest and then the next he has him on all fours, legs spread wide to accommodate Ilya’s body.

He brings his cock to hand, acting like he’s going to slip it inside of Shane, but instead brushes the head of his dick along his hole in a teasing motion. “мой зайчикMy bunny will let me do whatever I want, right?”

Shane nods his head vehemently, but that doesn’t work for Ilya. He lets his cock rest on Shane’s ass cheek, and leans over so Ilya’s chest is pressed against Shane’s back and he wraps a strong hand around his throat.

He squeezes the side of Shane’s neck hoping to get a verbal answer from him, “Hmm?”

Shane gasps, that fuzzy feeling perforating his mind and then he’s smiling, content lingering on his face, ”Да.””Yes.”

He tilts Shane’s head to the side first leaving a peck on the side of his flushed cheek and then he mutters out, ”Да?””Yeah?” He watches from above as Shane’s eyes go wide and mouth gape open as he slowly eases himself. Shane feels so warm and tight around him. He squeezes and clenches trying to let in as much of Ilya as he possibly can. ”Тебе это приятно?””Does this feel good?”

Shane can no longer keep up speaking Russian anymore now that he’s aware that he’s about to get royally fucked in the mattress in a matter of seconds. He braces on his forearms with as much strength as possible. “Yes this feels good, you always feel so good inside of me.”

Ilya leans back up, placing one hand on the center of his back and the other rests on the ample part of his waist as he begins to properly thrust inside of Shane.

The pace doesn’t start off slow or fast, but at a moderate tempo that has Ilya having to catch his breath because holy fuck. Shane looks incredible. His back is in a natural bow and you can see all his muscle definition. All those years of working to be toned being put on display for Ilya’s eyes to admire. For his fingers to press and scratch along to carry new marks for only them to see. His eyes travel down to the lower part of his back where his Venus dimples lay.

He places his thumb in the dimpled area, and groans out at the sight. “This is what you wanted yeah, wanted me to fuck you good.”

Shane grips the sheets, head falling forward, eyes scrunched up, moaning loudly. “Il-Ilya.”

“What is it sweetheart, talk to me.” Ilya is ruthless, never letting go of Shane as he pounds into him. “Come on, you had so much to say earlier, what happened now?”

Every time he goes to speak, the words die in his vocal chords and only noises get punched out of him. He feels so good, but he’s also tired. They’ve been going on for what feels like hours and he just wants to come. His dick keeps bouncing with every hard thrust Ilya gives him splattering precum everywhere. He lowers his upper body down so his chest is on the mattress and he extends both arms out, clinging onto the sheets to point where you can see his veins popping out of his arm from how hard he’s gripping.

From this position, Ilya watches with his mouth open in awe at the way Shane’s ass swallows his cock in one whole. The plump parts of his ass bouncing over and over again with beautiful succession, and the best part about this moment.

Ilya has stopped moving.

Not for too long, but the last two minutes, Shane has been the one putting in the work to make them feel good. Ilya has to dig his nails into Shane’s sides because the sight of Shane’s fat ass taking Ilya’s equally fat cock has him almost coming in Shane right then and there.

Shane reaches behind him, and Ilya is already on him, he grabs his forearm in a tight grip, and goes back to fucking Shane.

“O-oh Shit.” The added layer of being restricted on top of Ilya’s dick filling him up so nicely is making his whole body tingle everywhere. “Shit, Ilya can I come, I wanna fucking come.”

Ilya pushes at Shane’s body so they collapse on the bed, with Ilya pistoling down into him. “You wanna come baby?” His voice is dripping with malice that has Shane falling deeper. “Then do it, go ahead and come for me.”

Ilya isn’t being fair, Shane thinks to himself. How is he supposed to come when Ilya has his whole body trapped underneath him. The sheer momentum of Ilya’s thrust are making his cock rub against the sheets deliciously, but it’s literally not fucking enough. He squeezes the back on Ilya’s triceps that’s gripping his arm as he bites at the comforter, no longer being able to control how loud he is.

Ilya moves quickly to tug the blanket out of his mouth and then threads his hand in Shane’s hair, pulling at the roots. “Let me hear you. You said you needed to come so fucking do it.”

Shane doesn’t realize how high pitched he sounds right now, at this point he feels like he’s on an entirely different planet. Shane’s eyes scrunch up because yeah he’s pretty sure he’s about to come, but he also can’t tell because he’s never come hands free before. “Please Ilya just touch me I can’t” Shane hiccups in the middle of his words. “I can’t take it anymore.”

Ilya releases Shane’s hair from his hands, and before Shane can fall back into the safety and the comfort of the sheets, he’s being hauled up to his knees, back pressed to Ilya’s sturdy chest.

“You can’t take it anymore, is that what you said?”

It is but Shane shakes his head denying everything. “N-no I can take it. I can take it, it’s just I wanted to—” his voice gives out when he feels those familiar fingers wrap around his throat and the hand that’s wrapped around his waist slide down to his pelvic region.

“Wanted to what?”

Shane gasps, clutching onto Ilya’s forearm that’s holding onto his neck. His voice comes out breathless when Ilya’s hold becomes tighter around his throat. “Baby?”

Ilya tugs his earlobe between his teeth, releasing the cartilage. “What did you want Shane?”

Shane’s been practically begging for this all night. He’s hoping, pleading, praying that Ilya will be nice and give him an ounce of grace. He opens his eyes, now bleary with tears streaming from them and looks over at Ilya to speak,

“Please let me come.”

Ilya’s hand finally travels down to touch him where he needs it most and it’s like Shane is a marionette and Ilya is the puppeteer that’s controlling him because he can no longer keep himself up anymore. Instantly, Shane crumples at his touch and collapses into Ilya’s space.

He slides his hand into Ilya’s curly, dirty blond hair and grips it as tightly as possible as he whimpers away in the crevice of his neck, “Oh my god, oh fuck, Ilya, fuck, fuck f-fuck—”

“Finally gonna come for me sweetheart?”

Shane is past saying words now, “uh huh.”

“Then watch yourself.” He tweaks Shane’s nipples to add an extra layer of stimulation.

Shane's head falls to his cock and watches with an open mouth. Ilya’s hand is stroking just the tip, just the way Shane likes it. It’s at a fast past and Ilya keeps letting his thumb slip along his sensitive slit.

Drool drips from Shane’s mouth to add to the viscous pool of liquid coating his hard cock.

“You’re always so fucking wet.”

Shane nods in agreement because that’s all he can do. The squelching noises from his cock along with the sound of skin smacking full the room, and the noises add to the pleasure running through his body.

His body runs taut, but Ilya’s pace never breaks for a second, while he jerks Shane off.

“Oh my god I’m gonna come.” Shane’s words come all slurred out. His fingers scrap Ilya’s skull, and he knows that definitely hurts but he’s to fucked out to care. More tears leave his eyes when the taste of his release is right there.

He watches, just like Ilya told him to, as the first round of spurts shoot out. It lands all over the bed and Shane can’t stop the scream that’s wretched out of him. It feels like he’s coming for ages. His body goes limp and he’s pretty sure his dick is about to fall off, but in the best way possible.

His mind doesn’t comprehend it yet but he slowly sinks into the mattress face first, and the sheets aren’t cold anymore but they still feel soft on his firey skin, like he’s laying on a marshmallow. There’s also a heavy weight on top of him, it should probably feel uncomfortable, and maybe because all of his senses are heightened by tenfold it doesn’t feel like much, but it honestly feels nice to be squished between Ilya and their bed.

Ilya hasn’t pulled out of him, he’s not moving, just giving time for Shane to adjust.

Shane tilts his head to the side, mind still out of it. He can feel where Ilya is trying to pull out and Shane can’t have that and squeezes around him.

He’s sensitive but he also doesn’t care, “You haven’t come yet.”

“Yeah I know, it’s okay.” He was planning on jerking himself off, he already put Shane through the wringer, he doesn’t want to over do it.

“If you want you can still—“ words are hard right now, Shane is tethering that edge of trying to stay awake and falling asleep. “You can still use me, I’m fine with that I promise.”

Ilya kisses the back of Shane’s shoulder, how can someone be sweet and so perfect. Literally the perfect person for Ilya. He ignores Shane’s whining when he pulls out to maneuver him on his backside.

Ilya runs his fingers lightly up the center of his chest, “I want to see you.” He makes sure to start off gentle as he eases his way back into Shane. It takes every fiber in him to not say fuck it and start pounding into his ass. Shane is so warm and wet around him, and his hole keeps constructing his dick in the most beautiful way imaginable.

“You gotta stop doing that, baby.” Ilya pushes his legs up so Shane’s knees are bent close to his ears and Ilya has a better grip at his thighs.

Shane’s speech is slurred when he talks, “I can’t help it, you feel so good.”

Shane looks completely fucked out, his eyes are staring directly into Ilya’s soul like he’s trying to pick him apart, but he also looks completely lost. Each thrust Ilya gives him makes a squeak noise erupt from his vocal chords. There’s dried up tear trails on the corner of his eyes and Ilya wants to make new ones reappear.

Ilya knows he’s not holding up any better. His face is most likely red from exertion, he can feel a vein popping right out of his forehead. It’s like tunnel vision and the only thing he can focus on is Shane.

He feels himself fall deeper as he really starts ramming into Shane, “Oh f-fuck.”

“Are you gonna come inside me?” Shane is putting in that voice he does when wants something desperately from Ilya. It’s so pretty and so addicting, like a siren. Shane blinks up at him rapidly asking, “Isn’t that what you told me earlier?”

He needs Shane to stop talking right now, he’s so close to losing it and his voice is only making it worse.

Shane keeps going, “Aren’t you gonna come for me?”

“Fuck.” His nails dig deep in Shane’s plush thighs.

“Don’t you want to come inside your baby?”

“тише,””Hush,” Ilya grits out, he shoves three fingers in Shane’s mouth to shut him up. Shane sucks on his digits coating, the fingers in as much spit as he can.

Ilya’s hips stutter when Shane spits in his fingers and then focuses on only sucking on the tips, “Oh my fucking god.” He turns his head away from the indecency of Shane’s mouth and looks down where they’re connected.

It’s such a fucking mess. It’s sopping wet with a mixture of Ilya’s precum, saliva and possibly Shane’s fluids coating his hole and Ilya’s cock. The sight of it is filthy but also so fucking hot that Ilya almost falls over. He can feel himself throbbing in Shane and he just knows he’s mere seconds away of coming inside of him.

“I’m gonna fucking come.” He clutches into Shane’s stomach as he drives into him. Shane looks down to see and holds his dick and balls in one hand to catch the sight of everything.

Ilya’s nails claw at his abs leaving deep red marks in its way as he comes inside of him. Every part of his body is pulsating at such a high degree that he can’t stop convulsing. This has to be the hardest that he’s ever came.

The vicious substance coats his cock and Shane’s hole and Ilya is almost tempted to grab his phone and take a picture so it can be immortalized forever. He can’t tell if he’s stopped coming or if his body is playing tricks on him and he just wants to stay fucking Shane until he passes out.

Fuck his body feels so tired.

Ilya falls on top of Shane while still inside him not wanting to leave his space. Eventually he needs to pull out soon, but that also means cleaning the sheets and both of them are way too exhausted to do that.

So they lay together calming down their racing heartbeats until they feel comfortable moving again.

🎬🎬🎬

“Thank you for helping me.”

It’s the first thing Ilya hears as he looks down at a well satisfied Shane. His cheek is squished on Ilya’s chest, and he has his leg hooked around Ilya’s waist in a side cuddle. They had recently cleaned up, by first taking a shower to rub off all the sticky remnants from earlier, and then Shane reset the bed while Ilya brought in a bowl of fruit along with Shane’s water bottle that he left in the living area.

The room had been quiet for a while, the tv was on low with a random movie playing as background noise as they lay together, enjoying each other's company.

Ilya runs his hand through Shane’s hair, occasionally scraping his nails gently on his scalp. He doesn’t know what Shane’s talking about, but he presumes he means helping him with yoga. “It’s no problem to me Shane. I like helping you stretch.” He throws a wink in for good measure.

Shane smacks his chest playfully, “That’s not what I was referring to. I just mean, I like how when something is really bothering me, you don’t take my silence as an answer.” Ilya scrunches his eyebrows in confusion, so Shane elaborates more. “I know that sounds weird, and for some people they may think it’s overbearing, but I-I don’t know. I just like how you won’t stop pushing me until I finally break.”

Ilya understands, at least he thinks he does, Shane is someone who has no problem vocalizing when he’s upset, at anyone for that matter. It’s just the type of person that he is, however, there’s the small occasion where he may need to be “provoked” in order to finally speak his mind. The signs are usually there, with Shane suddenly becoming short tempered, and his emotions fluctuating like crazy. One minute he’ll be fine and the next moment he’s getting angry over something that’s easily fixable.

It’s all about being seen and understood. Sometimes if Ilya is in a bad mood, he’ll stay quiet and the only way for him to talk about how he feels, in a way that’s most comfortable to him, is in Russian. For someone who’s practically fluent in Russian, he just feels that English doesn’t directly translate how he’s feeling on an emotional level. It’s definitely a perk having a boyfriend who’s willing to learn his mother tongue because now he doesn’t have to struggle as much as he used to whenever he’s feeling perturbed.

It almost feels wrong for Shane to thank him for something like this, as if Ilya taking the time to figure out what his boyfriend needs is worth being grateful for. That’s simply ridiculous to him, so he just listens as Shane rattles on.

“This has been the most eventful year of my life, and it feels like I’m constantly moving, moving, moving and I never get a chance to just breathe. Don’t get me wrong I’ve been loving every second of it but I’m still trying to balance my public life and private life and it’s really difficult.” Shane chuckles weakly, “I don’t know how you do it.”

That’s the thing, Ilya doesn’t know either.

Sure he’s been in the public eye longer than Shane, and he’s an openly bisexual, Russian immigrant that has fought tooth and nail to be respected in this god forsaken industry. He’s seen the way people comment on his sexuality, to people saying they found information on how his parents were these “evil spies” trying to get their hands on “private, American documents”

Don’t ask him because he doesn’t know either.

He’s seen all the speculative bullshit on everything he’s ever done, because when you’re in the public eye like that, you will always be constantly monitored, and that is probably one of the hardest things to accept.

One thing he’s realized is that he’s overly cautious. He wants to protect what they have. It’s gruesome the way the media will do anything to find some dirt on you just so it can make headlines, regardless of how true or not true it is. That’s why they do everything in their power to not be seen with each other unless it’s a public event. All it takes is one damning photo from the press for all hell to break loose and truthfully neither of them are ready to handle that yet.

“Does it ever bother you that we have to hide our relationship because of me?”

Ilya doesn’t like the wording of Shane’s sentence, he’s nearly contorting his face in disgust at the fact Shane would even say something like that, “I mean yes, of course it does. I don’t like to keep what we have a secret, but I don’t think it’s your fault.” This conversation is extremely complex. It would be easy for Ilya to point the finger at Shane and blame him for their need to keep secrecy, but that would also make him a shit person. “I know why you’re not ready to come out yet and none of that has anything to do with you.”

It’s not the fact that Shane isn’t ready to come out. If given the opportunity he would upload a post of him kissing Ilya and a heartfelt explanation of his sexuality in a heartbeat. Coming out was never the issue, it’s the consequences he’s fearful of. It’s the possibility of not being taken seriously in the industry, along with being denied roles.

You’re now considered a liability.

Not to mention, the amount of hate that one can experience, you’re truly not protected in a space like this. With Ilya he knows that he can never step foot in Russia for probably as long as he’s alive, and although he’s accepted that, he also acknowledges how fucked up the situation in itself is. So he will gladly keep what they have out of the public if that means protecting Shane and himself from anything vile.

“Shane, if it was such an issue to me, I just wouldn’t be with you.”

Shane chuckles lightly, “Okay well ouch.”

“No I’m just saying—”

“I get what you’re saying.” Shane's face rests in a permanent pout now. “It’s just frustrating, you know.”

“Yes, frustrating and not fair, but hey, that means I keep you all to myself.”

They’ve had this conversation before on numerous occasions.

The first time this topic was brought up was after their first date. Both of them became wine drunk and Shane accidentally mentioned he couldn’t imagine his life without Ilya. There was a sudden shift in the air after that but Ilya chalked it up to be a joke. Maybe the wine was making Shane a bit loose-lipped, and he was talking for the sake of talking. Ilya laughed. Probably not a good time to do that, but didn’t know what else to do, his heart was racing, with the feeling of how too fucking real everything was becoming.

It was late, the sky was devoid of color and they should probably be sleeping by now, but the energy surrounding them is what’s keeping them both awake. They’re at Shane’s apartment, sitting on his couch, Ilya’s hand is on top of Shane’s as they have a heart to heart.

Ilya listens carefully as he tries to concentrate on Shane’s words, the alcohol has taken an effect on both of them, but he still understands what Shane is saying.

“I hear you зайчикbunny, I feel the same way.” Maybe now isn’t the time for nicknames, but Ilya can’t help himself. Not with Shane scrunching his nose so cutely like a bunny. Even though it’s been so long since they sat down and really talked like this, the conversation flows so easily.

Shane picks up one of Ilya’s hands placing it on his lap. He strums along his skin, avoiding eye contact, and he’s shaking his head. As if he doesn’t believe Ilya fully understands what he means.

Shane licks his lips as he tries to speak more clearly and direct with his words. “I need us to be honest with ourselves okay. If we’re really going to be serious about this, I need you to be honest with me–

“I’m always honest with you.” Ilya cuts in. His heart is racing a million miles per minute, and they haven’t even addressed the ginormous elephant in the room.

“And you can’t sugar coat things with me anymore.”

That makes Ilya very uncomfortable. He never really liked confrontation. It was such a bad habit of his to let things sit and simmer inside his mind until it all boiled up and he exploded. He likes to believe he’s changed since he was younger but Shane doesn’t know that. He nods his head, acknowledging Shane’s words.

Shane adds on, “It’s okay for you to be blunt with me. I want you to speak freely, even if it might hurt my feelings.”

“Okay,” Ilya whispers out.

That night was very emotional, but also needed, for the both of them. Many tears were shed and there were definitely not so soft words said to each other, but that was okay.

It was okay because it allowed for them to come to terms with who they were in the past, where they are now, and the expectations that both of them had for the future, if they still wanted something like that with each other.

Before anything, they were best friends. They grew up together, and got lucky enough to build a beautiful relationship out of their special bond, and they have matching tattoos to symbolize it.

The moon tattooed on Shane’s ankle and the sun tattooed on the back of his shoulder. It was Ilya’s idea and Shane fell in love with it and they both got it done on their friendiversary. It was something simple that meant the world to them.

This is his best friend, boyfriend, and partner crime. In every universe they will always be together, and Ilya has no doubt about that.

“You look like you’re about to fall asleep.”

Ilya tilts his head down at him, Shane’s eyes are closed but he has a soft smile placed on his face. “So do you. I think it’s time for a nap.”

Shane scrunched his eyebrows, “It’s literally only noon.”

Ilya makes a point, “So? Do naps have a scheduled time?”

He pulls Shane up closer to him and with that they spend the rest of their day together resting in each other's arms.