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The sun shone, birds chirped, and Koyori was holding hands with a cute girl. And not just any cute girl, no, it was her super cute Nene-senpai! And she'd asked her out on a date today!
‘So what do you think our babies would look like, Koyo-chan?’ Nene asked. She tip-toed along the edge of the curb, arm out wide as she let her steps be guided by some complicated rule. ‘Are they gonna have my eyes and your hair or get allll mixed up? Oh, but they'll definitely have your ears and tail, right? I'd be sad for them if they just have nothing there!’
Koyori laughed, and pulled her back just in time for a harried taxi driver to shoot past. ‘Careful there, senpai,’ she giggled. And if she got close enough to smell her a little, that just couldn't be helped right? ‘I really don't want to put your brain in a robot or something!’
‘But robots are cool!’ she said. ‘I could have a big shell, like a beetle!’
‘But you'd be all cold and hard, right? Just imagine trying to cuddle someone like that.’
‘Ah!’ she gasped. ‘And I haven't even petted your ears yet! You can't! You absolutely can't! Not before I've floofed all of you!’
‘Alright, alright,’ she laughed. ‘But, if we had daughters I'd probably be the one making them right? So what would you want them to be like, senpai?’
Nene hummed, swinging their hands between them. ‘Could you, like, make them peach-blonde like me but with everything else from you? Just imagine, your pretty eyes and then a fluffy tail and those cute ears in my colors! They'd be totally the adorablest!’ she decided, eyes sparkling. ‘Please tell me you can do that!’
‘Hey, wouldn't you want a little variation?’ she giggled, shaking her head. ‘They don't all need to look the same, you know?’
‘Wait, I could?!’ she gasped. ‘Then I want all the fluffy colors! A whole rainbow family of fluffy tails calling me mama!’
‘Or as many as we could actually raise, anyway,’ Koyori hummed. ‘Then again, if we're vat-growing cute little clones instead we could skip past all the messy and disgusting parts. That'd be nice too, wouldn't it? We'd get to play with them right away.’
‘Aw, but how could I call myself their mommy if I never changed a diaper?’ Nene frowned. ‘And that's no way to raise a child, Koyo-chan!’
‘Okay, okay, no growth vats,’ she laughed, holding up her hands. ‘But geez, how did we even end up here?’
‘Well, you talked about how annoyed Pekochan-senpai was because their daughter ended up looking all like senchou-senpai, and that made me think of how adorable little Perine was in her bear onesie,’ she smiled, and Koyori didn't mind the way her insides squeezed at all. ‘It just kind of happened from there, right?’
‘I did go along with it, I guess,’ she laughed, shaking her head. ‘Am I really that cute, though? You sounded pretty… enthusiastic there.’
‘Totally!’ Nene beamed, head bobbing eagerly. ‘I can die happy if I'll get buried in your tail, Koyoyo! Oh, can I call you Koyoyo too? It's so cute!’
‘Sure, why not?’ she laughed, heart swelling with something soft and fluttery. ‘And I'll call you Nenene, then!’
‘Koyoyo!’
‘Nenene!’
‘Koyoyo!’
‘Nenene!’
‘Koyo- ah, we're here!’ Nene said, and they looked up at the big red heart of a McChama’s.
‘Hey there!’ Haachama called out, brushing past in a flutter of polka-dots and precariously stacked trays. ‘Just take a seat, I'll be right there!’
She bustled off through a side door, and they were left with just enough time to squeak down on the plush red seats before she was back again, bright smile and yellow notepad at the ready. ‘So what can I get my cute juniors today? I recommend the Haato shake, now available in green and purple!’
‘Green and purple?’ Koyori asked, tilting her head. ‘Like, melon and grape flavor? Or something else?’
Haachama giggled. ‘No! They just taste, silly!’
‘Okay, I'll have the green shake then,’ she laughed. ‘I have to know what the heck that's supposed to mean now!’
‘I'm sure you won't regret it,’ she smiled. ‘Not for long, anyway!’
‘And I'll have the purple, then we can share!’ Nene added. ‘No extra straws please, I wanna taste Koyoyo too!’
‘One extra for me, please,’ she laughed. ‘I'm not just giving away my lips~’
‘Aw, but I want you to taste me too!’ Nene pouted. ‘Don't you want to taste me, Koyoyo?’
‘Ask me again at the end of our date,’ she winked. ‘I'm not that easy a girl, you know?’
‘One green and one purple shake, then,’ Haachama nodded, jotting it down. She produced two big menus bound in red leather from her tiny apron somehow, and presented them with a flourish. ‘I'll just leave you to your choices, then!’
She blinked out, and Koyori confusedly looked at where she'd just been. ‘How does she do that?’ she asked. ‘One moment she's right there… is that how she runs all those restaurants all by herself? It's always just her, right?’
‘It’s Chama-senpai,’ Nene shrugged, nose already buried in the menu, and she had a point there didn't she? ‘But hey, what are you gonna order? These burger sets look really yummy, but they're definitely too big for my tummy.’
‘Why don't we share one, then?’ she asked, ears perking up. There was no way she'd squander so obvious a chance!
‘You're so smart, Koyoyo!’ Nene beamed. ‘Oh, but you should pick then! I already got to pick our date and all, so it's fair if you pick the food!’
‘Alright!’ she hummed, looking over the double-page spread of culinary decisions that'd make any sane chef hang up their apron for good. ‘I don't really feel like anything in particular, though… maybe we should just go in blind?’
She closed her eyes and stabbed out a finger, and they both leaned in to see where she'd landed. ‘Looks like we're having the takoyaki burger set,’ she smiled back at Nene. She could have sworn it was on the other page, but she wasn't going to nitpick the small stuff today!
‘To share please, senpai!’ Nene added.
‘Great choice!’ Haachama said right next to them, and Koyori almost jumped out of her seat. ‘But first, here's two Haato shakes!’
She swallowed her heart back down her throat as she glanced back behind them. Seriously, how did she keep doing that? She hadn't even smelled her, not until she was just there in all her cloying sweetness!
‘You wanted to order, didn't you?’ Haachama smiled. ‘Nobody has to wait at McChama’s, that's our pride as a restaurant!’
Was it teleportation? Portals? Spacetime bends? Localised entanglement? She wanted to ask so many questions, but no, bad brain! No science! She was here with her cute senpai today!
Her cute senpai who'd innocently called this a date…
She glanced back at Nene as Haachama blinked off again, watching her kick out her legs and sip her shake with a happy hum. Was she just reading too much into it? She didn't look like she was thinking about stuff like that at all, right? Still, maybe, just maybe…
But spinning her wheels like this definitely wasn't going to get her anywhere, so she examined her drink instead. It was incredibly green, an almost glowing neon hue that reflected the bright lights above as if it were a solid surface. But when she tilted the glass it flowed… well, not really like water, but maybe thin yoghurt? Something sticky for sure, and she'd better not let her brain wander too much there either.
She took a small sip.
And… tasted?
It was a drink. It was cool, it was refreshing, it had a flavour. But that flavour was nothing. It wasn't tasteless, it was her brain refusing to register what it was. There definitely was a taste, it was even kind of good, but it also just… wasn't.
She peered down into the glass, the green sludge offering no answers whatsoever. ‘Hey, Nene-chan?’ she asked. ‘Does yours taste like weird nothing too?’
‘I know, right? It's sooo weird!’ she giggled. ‘Ah, but you should have some of mine too!’ she added, pushing it over. ‘C’mon, lemme taste how it mixes with your flavor!’
She remembered her extra straw a little too late, but really, when you got down to it it really wasn't any dirtier than kissing right? Just not nearly as much fun. Maybe she should just kiss Nene instead… but then the purple hit her tongue, and her brain shorted out again.
It was familiar, like grandma's lemonade and curry at the same time. Like every childhood favourite dish and refreshing drink on a hot summer day all tangled up and bouncing around in an echo, each slipping away the more she tried to reach for any one in particular. ‘It really just doesn't get any less weird,’ she laughed, shaking her head. ‘How the heck does she even make this stuff?’
‘I don't know, but this one tastes at least ten percent like you now!’ Nene declared. ‘Delicious Koyoyo flavor!’
They totally should compare that to the real thing. Verify the data. It was the scientifically responsible thing to do, right?
But before she could suggest some due diligence, Haachama manifested again.
‘Here you are!’ she declared, a mouth-watering gust of hot air wafting over them as she lifted the cover of her big dish. ‘Your takoyaki burger set! Enjoy!’
Koyori reached for the emergency bottle inside her cardigan, the one thing she'd never, ever leave behind even without the many pockets of her lab coat. But the incredible sight before her… it stayed her hand. Not for the dozen takoyaki threatening to spill out from between wide toasted buns cut wavily down the middle, not for the thick-cut golden-brown fries ringing the plate. No, what stopped her was the mayonnaise gushing out of the burger and all over her half of the plate in a thick tide of savory delight.
‘Senpai… it's beautiful,’ she breathed. Just this once, she might not need her trusty friend at all! ‘I didn't think I'd ever see a meal I couldn't improve!’
‘We make sure to suit our customer’s tastes!’ she winked. ‘Everything for the ultimate Haachameal experience!’
‘Luna would totally kill you if she saw this, though,’ Nene laughed. She pulled a constipated face. ‘Takoyaki are serious business, naa! Don't disrespect takoyaki like this, naa!’
But Haachama only crossed her arms with a smug smile. ‘Would you believe I actually came up with this for her?’
‘Wait, seriously?’ Koyori giggled. ‘You want us to believe she made you do this to her precious takoyaki?’
‘Yep! Or well, it was more like she showed up demanding I make them exciting again, all scared she was getting bored of them,’ she added with a fond roll of her eyes. ‘Then she got bored of this instead, but some of my regulars decided it was their new favourite thing so it just kind of stuck? But anyway, I'll just let you enjoy them while they're still nice and hot! Oh, and mind your tongues!’
Did she just- she didn't, right? Even she wasn't just going to right in the middle of a restaurant! Well, not unless Nene asked really cutely, or if she kept being so cute in general, or if some awful, awful coincidence just happened to make their lips meet… no, she had that much self-control! Nene’s lips would be that much more delicious if she just held back a little longer! She had to!
‘Koyo-chan?’ Nene quietly asked, an all too serious expression on her face. ‘Are you thinking what I'm thinking?’
Her breath hitched. Was she really-
‘It'd be really bad if we burned our tongues now, right?’ she continued. ‘And I don't have Lamy-chan to tell me to slow down… can you keep me safe?’
Ah. Right. Scalding. That was a thing that happened. To tongues.
‘Yeah, that'd be the worst!’ she quickly laughed. ‘But how are we going to eat this?’ she added, eyeing the daunting task ahead of them. ‘Cutting up a burger is just wrong, and it'll let out all the delicious mayo right? But if we try to eat this with our hands we're not going to be cute at all!’
Which left one obvious solution, didn't it?
And Nene was already holding up her half, mayonnaise dripping down between her fingers. ‘Say aah, Koyoyo!’
‘Just what I was thinking!’ she laughed. ‘Then, don't mind if I do!’
She leaned in. Fangs sunk into soft, yielding breadflesh, takoyaki parting their shells to fill her mouth with bursts of flavor amidst the tide of creamy joy. For a brief, blissful moment, she was in delicious heaven.
And then it was gone already, Nene holding up her empty hands at her with a giggle. Wait, no, not empty - they were all covered in mayonnaise! And why was she getting closer?
But it was mayonnaise!
Wonderful mayonnaise!
Nene-chan with mayonnaise!
No, she had to hold back! It wasn't as if she wanted to lap up every last drop, and more importantly there was no way Nene-chan wouldn't-
‘Hey, that tickles!’ Nene giggled, and when did her tongue slip between her fingers?
‘Ah, shorry!’ she said, lapping up a last drop as she pulled away. ‘I just lost control a little there, I think!’ she laughed, sheepishly rubbing her head. ‘I really didn't mean to!’
‘It felt kind of nice, though?’ Nene said, tilting her head, and what the heck was she supposed to say to that? ‘Ah, do you want the rest too?’ she added, holding up her other hand. ‘It's bad to waste food, right? And I don't mind letting you have me.’
Did she… she had to have some idea of what she was doing to her here, right? There was no way she wasn't aware of the implications at all!
But Nene just smiled that adorable smile of hers, and it was all she could do to grab the napkins and thrust them at her instead. ‘Here!’
She pouted, but did give her the moment she so badly needed to pull herself back together. But only a moment, before the napkins fell to the side and an eager face turned on her again. ‘My turn!’ Nene said, and opened her mouth wide like a seal expecting a treat. ‘Aaaah!’
‘Are you sure you don't want to keep your eyes open at least?’ Koyori giggled. ‘You'll definitely make a mess, you know?’
‘You have to surprise me!’ she declared, and what argument did that leave? She carefully picked up Nene’s half, tragically devoid of mayonnaise with some thick brown sauce welling up instead, but surely Haachama had her reasons right? Nobody who put proper mayonnaise on food could be a bad cook!
She gently pushed it up against Nene’s mouth, and her first chomp promptly smeared the sauce all over her face.
‘Well, that was predictable,’ Koyori laughed. She carefully put the whole affair back down, and reached for the napkins again. ‘Can you hold still for a moment? It's gonna get all over your cute jacket if we're not quick.’
‘But hey, I got you all over me!’ Nene said as she dabbed at her mouth. ‘That's super lovey-dovey, right?’
‘Geez, you're such a kid sometimes,’ she giggled, shaking her head. What the heck was supposed to be romantic about this? She totally just felt like a mom here…
Nene abruptly turned her head, and she paused. ‘Nene?’ she asked. ‘Hey, I can't get it off properly if you move like that.’
‘... I was serious, you know,’ she quietly said. ‘When I called this a date, I mean.’
Her breath caught, a sharp intake of air that did nothing for the sudden tightness in her chest. ‘So when you said-’ she started, but that wasn't the right question here, was it? ‘You… like me too?’
Nene nodded, a rapid bob of her head that sent drops of sauce flying but she didn't care. ‘Yes! You're super cute, and sexy, and smart, and I wanna kiss you silly every time you laugh at my stupid jokes! So please don't call me a kid!’ she said, earnest eyes seizing hers. ‘I- I wanna do adult things with you, Koyoyo!’
‘Ah,’ she dumbly said, and what was this strangely light feeling, like she could just float away? But Nene was still looking at her, and her first impulse was to apologise to those big green eyes, but that wasn't right either was it?
‘Then, um, do you want to kiss me now?’ she asked, heat climbing up her cheeks. ‘Because I've kind of been thinking about kissing you this whole time, to be honest.’
She wasn't sure who moved first but then they were both leaning in over the table, tangy sauce on Nene’s lips, and for a moment everything was wonderful.
Then someone scraped her throat next to them, and they jolted back to Haachama’s amused smile.
‘Save the rest for somewhere else, please,’ she chided, as if she wasn't looking at anything unusual. ‘I had the upholstery deep-cleaned just last week, okay?’
Couldn't she have waited at least a little longer? Just when she finally got to… but as she glanced back at Nene, she realised the rest of the restaurant was gone around them. Or no, not gone, it was just really hard to look outside their booth? Like a fuzzy static that made you want to look anywhere else, somehow. Did Haachama… give them some privacy?
‘Um, thank you?’ she tried, but Haachama gently shook her head.
‘Don't thank me, I just wanted this delicious little moment allll to myself,’ she winked. ‘But don't you guys worry about the bill now, okay? I'm plenty satisfied already~’
She sauntered off, an idle snap of her fingers returning the restaurant to normal. And then it was just the two of them again, sheepishly looking at each other.
‘So… that was nice?’ Koyori tried. ‘I mean, not the part where we got interrupted, obviously, but before that!’
Nene touched her lips. ‘Can we do that again, though?’ she asked, tilting her head. ‘I only tasted sauce, I think.’
She laughed, tension snapping like string. ‘Let's get out of here first, okay? I really don't want to get Haachama-senpai mad at us.’
And that, she didn't need to tell Nene twice.