Work Text:
URANUS'S DIARY
Hello? Hello? Hi!
Property of: Caelus Urano
If found, please return it to me immediately!! Also, please ignore the red stain on the first page. Neptune accidentally spilled one of my red paints.
Solar System age: 5.2 million years-old
ENTRY #1
Dear Diary,
Hello! Hi! Um, should I even address this diary or am I simply writing to myself? Anyways, hello, my new diary! You were gifted to me by the Sun, my host star. The Sun likes to give us random gifts on random days or occasions, and this diary was one of them. So I decided, why not make use of it?
I'm sorry, maybe I should introduce myself! My name is Uranus. I know it's an unfortunate name, but we're here anyway. I'm happy to write to you now because I feel a bit alone at the moment here in my star system. My cousin and my only friend, Neptune, is missing again. I guess it's because of his long orbit around the Sun, or maybe he's playing hide and seek with asteroids around the Kuiper Belt? I don't know, but I hope I can see him again soon. I don't like being alone.
Well...I was alone, until something crazy happened today! I got this diary a few days ago, but I only decided to start writing it here because I have nobody else to talk to about what just happened. I was just practicing my painting when suddenly...BOOM!
I saw tiny rocks in front of me! I was so scared, I almost ran away! But I couldn't, because they were captured by my gravity, and I was afraid of hurting them!
Diary, they were the cutest things ever. There were five of them. They were so tiny and soft and sweet.
I asked the Sun what these creatures were, and he said they're my moons! I have moons, Diary! Moons!
The realization of having moons somehow drove me to tears. But I couldn't cry too much and too loud because I might wake them all up! They just finished forming, and each of them were sleeping so peacefully. I wanted to hold them and cherish them forever. I don't know where these little ones came from, but I'm guessing I formed all of them? Or were they captured by my gravity?
For example, one of my neighboring planets, Saturn, was screaming a lot the other day because "rocks" started appearing in his orbit, captured by his gravity. He said, "There's so many of them! Help me! Get them away from me!" Poor guy was so scared and overwhelmed!
But for me, I just wanted to cry. Look at how cute they are! Here is a photo of me with my little moons.
See? Don't you think they're the cutest things ever? I even have names for all of them! The largest one out of the group, I named her Titania, because she looks like the element, titanium. The purple one is called Umbriel, because she reminds me of the shadows, like an umbra. That cute one is named Ariel, because her face looks radiant, her colors like that of a mermaid's tail. Then the one with the pacifier I named Oberon, but I forgot where I got his name from. The smallest one is called Miranda, because when she sleeps, she mutters little phrases like "mimimi," and that's so cute!
I seriously want to cry again just thinking about them, Diary! I hope I can keep these moons forever. I've never parented a moon before, let alone quintuplets of them. But I promise to be the best father to little Titania, Oberon, Umbriel, Ariel, and Miranda! I'll write again tomorrow, Diary.
Good-bye!
Uranus
Solar System age: 5.2 million years-old
ENTRY #2
Dear diary,
Hello again, Diary! It's almost time for us planets to go to sleep, but I think I'll be out late. I'm tired because I had to put all five of my moons to bed again, but I'm staying up in case Neptune comes back. I hope I can see him again, I've been worried about him.
But for now I'll focus on my new moons. They're a real handful, Diary! And it's just been a day!
Oberon always has a pacifier, because he cries a lot and he cries loudly. Umbriel seems rather silent, although I caught her hissing at Ariel. For a moon that just formed, she already had teeth. Really sharp ones! Ariel cried because she was afraid of Umbriel, but when I gave her one of my old toys, a plush star, she became quiet. I'll let Ariel keep the toy, since she seems to calm down every time she held it with her teeny tiny gravity. Meanwhile, Miranda bit Titania. Maybe Miranda was hungry? I wasn't so sure what to feed them, so I had to quickly go out to the nearest store to buy some organic baby moon food. Don't worry, the moons were left safe with Jupiter, another one of the planets. He has yet to form any moons. You know, he's so big for a planet. I wonder if he's actually going to become a star?
Maybe I should also talk about other things besides my moons. I don't want to sound too annoying to you, Diary. Like, there's the other side of the Solar System, where five rocky planets hang out. Although they're much smaller than I am, they're definitely not as cute as my moons! Oops, sorry not sorry. I'm intrigued because they all look like a solid friend group, the rocky planets, I mean. I recall their names being Mercury, Venus, Theia, Proto-Earth, and Mars. I wish I could have a solid friend group too, but my only friend keeps disappearing, and I'm scared of being around the two giant planets, because they're obviously gargantuan! Instead, I watched the five rocky planets play some games altogether using asteroids. Oh, I hope they don't hurt each other. That looked so dangerous!
Anyways, today was a fun day spent with my moons. Do I have a favorite one? No, I don't. I love all of them equally! I can't stop admiring how adorable they all look. I really hope I'll be able to do well as a moon dad. They're just such precious little things! I feel sleepy now, so I'll go head to bed too. Of course, I'll be awake if my moons need anything. I don't want them to cry too much and become stressed. It feels right to keep them happy and healthy.
Good night!
Uranus