Work Text:
Ari and Dante are watching the stars in the back of Ari’s truck. As Dante blabs on about constellations, Ari is vaguely aware it’s been a while since he’s said anything. He can’t bring himself to change that, however. He doesn’t really mind being quiet. It helps him recharge. Yeah. He’s tired.
Ari glanced up to see Dante has stopped talking and is now looking at him with an analyzing gaze. Ari hopes Dante doesn’t think he’s lost in his head again. Ari can be quiet and expressive. If he only wasn’t so tired all the time…
”Ari? You okay? You haven’t spoken in a while.” Dante propped himself up on his elbow and brushed Ari’s hair out of his face. Ari nodded, leaning into Dante’s hand. “Just… don’t feel like talking?” Dante muttered. Ari nodded again. “Do you want me to stop talking?”
Ari shook his head, pulling himself closer to Dante and nuzzling his chest. Dante smiled. Even when Ari couldn’t find the words to express his love he could certainly be affectionate. Dante began to talk about the desert, petting Ari’s hair.
Ari found out how nice it was to not have to talk. He got to recharge a bit, and nobody expected anything of him. It reminded him of his childhood, when him and Bernardo would play with cars together, without saying a word. Before he knew it, Dante was waving a hand on front of him with a concerned look.
”Now you’re stuck in your head again.” Dante declared, lying back down and rubbing Ari’s back. “I love you… even when you can’t say it back… I need you here with me… I can’t lose you to your own head.” Ari didn’t know what to say. Even if he did he didn’t know if he could say it. No words would come to him, his voice refusing to sound. Before it was tranquil, but now it frustrated him. He opted for expressing this in a grumble, but it game out more whiny than intended. His face shone red and he hid in Dante’s chest, who rubbed his back soothingly.
Dante drove them back home, where they sat in the truck in Ari’s driveway for a bit. Dante held Ari’s hand and rubbed it with his thumb. Dante could almost tell what Ari was thinking because he mumbled to him. “You don’t have to have an answer as to why you’re feeling the way you are. Just let yourself feel, Ari. It’s okay to not be okay. I can feel the exhaustion radiating off you like an unsteady tide.”
Ari did nothing for a moment, and Dante was about to wave his hand in front of his face when he saw the tears that had sprung to Ari’s eyes. Ari swallowed, licked his lips, and spoke in a raspy voice. “I’m sorry…”